Autism

Chris claims to be a high-functioning autistic male. Most likely has Asperger's but still exaggerates the impact of autism on his life. People who tell him to get help are playing "kick the autistic." His stupidity is blamed on his "autistic mental block." It is not currently clear exactly how he came to be diagnosed as "autistic", other than that he was diagnosed at the age of 6, receives government disability checks (his "monthly tug-boat") for this mental disability, and has been using his condition as a crutch from almost day one of his diagnosis.

Things Chris blames on his autism

Everything.