My Little Pony

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“	I recommend buying yourself a My Little Pony figure of your favorite color or whatever. Now, uh, stroking the hair of said pony is very relaxing and therapeutic, and also rubbing it against your cheek. That's... nice.	”
Chris' advice for young men^[1]

Chris: The original brony.

My Little Pony is a line of toys and animated programs first created in 1981 by Hasbro. It is intended for girls aged 4–8, but its 2010s incarnation earned favorable acclaim among adults, and a cult male following called "bronies", with the other term "pegasisters" used for female fans. Chris is one of the few bronies to exist before the Friendship is Magic cartoon gained popularity; he picked up an interest in the franchise after being introduced to it by Megan in 2007, buying several of the toys as well as making custom-made My Little Pony dolls for his friends. He has since developed an interest in the Friendship is Magic cartoon.

Chris's early fascination with the series, long before it regained popularity with its fourth generation, means that he has occasionally been referred to as 'the first Brony' by observers, though Chris didn't refer to himself as part of the fandom until 2011. Due to past Shenanigans and his affair with his own mother, Chris is shunned and unwanted by most, if not the entirety, of the community.

Chris and ponies

One of Chris's ponies, as seen in his bedroom.

Prior to Chris's discovery by the internet, he had already made several homemade pony figures. The homemade ponies vary between being blatant ripoffs of anime characters, most notably the titular character from Naruto and Edward Elric from Fullmetal Alchemist, and horrible Mary Sues such as Cheroki-Chan, who is clearly based on the comic-book version of Chris, and Crystal, whose origin is obvious.

In his infamous FUTURE MESSAGE, Chris first made his love of My Little Pony known when he recommended to all his viewers that they buy MLP figures of their favorite color to stroke and rub against their cheek, claiming that it was "very therapeutic" and that one could talk to the ponies and pretend that they were girls they wanted to ask out, to help them build confidence. At the time, this was viewed as a very revealing aspect of Chris's life, earning him the mockery of Encyclopedia Dramatica and 4chan yet again.

In CWC Update 18 March 2009 More Updated, his My Little Pony figurines can be seen hanging from his ceiling.

Friendship is Magic (2010-2019)

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is the longest-running incarnation of My Little Pony, premiering during the 2010s and running for nine seasons, concluding its run in October 2019.

Chris is a fan of the series, and was greatly distraught over what he feels is its premature ending.

After Friendship is Magic (2019 onwards)

Main article: My Little Pony Protests

“	This is an official command from your CPU Blue Heart in agreement with Princess Celestia of Equestria all of which in our sister dimension. Thank you.	”
Chris using his messiah complex to address Hasbro for the continuation of Friendship is Magic.^[2]

Friendship is Magic ended its nine-year run in October 2019. Chris, at 37 years of age, couldn't bear to see his favorite cartoon end, and instead wallowed in his delusions and became convinced from his imaginary friends that G4 would continue. He took to video and Twitter to try to convince Hasbro to listen to him and to cancel their plans to reboot My Little Pony into its fifth generation, or G5.

In 2020, much to Chris's dismay, Friendship is Magic was succeeded by a spin-off series, My Little Pony: Pony Life, which reunites most of the regular cast albeit with a radically-different animation style, which Chris likens to Teen Titans Go! by giving it the unaffectionate nickname, "GOPony"; however, his main gripe against the show is likely the fact that the cancellation of G4 failed to meet his unrealistic prediction of the show continuing to Season 14, with all the main characters evolving into overpowered Alicorns.

In 2021, upon news that the My Little Pony G5 reboot was proceeding, Chris snapped out of his phase of role-playing as Sonichu, which he had kept up for over ten months, in order to personally bash the upcoming cartoon. Soon afterwards, he began protesting the new generation, albeit in a more subdued way than before. By the time the reboot premiered, Chris was in jail, but his last upload prior to being placed behind bars was a furious rant directed at Hasbro, and his old habits flared up once more, claiming that the very existence of the show would plunge reality into chaos. Even after his release and eventual return to the internet, Chris continued to protest G5 on Twitter - most recently, he has blocked the majority of the voice cast associated with the show in an act of protest, and has since come to believe, inexplicably and preposterously, that the G5 characters are 'demons in disguise', that the show - and Pony Life before it- are Russian propaganda, and that G5 has triggered World War III. What prompted this radical shift, outside of existing delusions, is currently uncertain.

Chris and the Brony fandom

Main article: Brony

Bronies are teenage-to-adult fans of My Little Pony, in particular the My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic generation. Bronies have organized conventions themed around the series.

Cutie mark

"Shaking my ass at Walmart is my destiny, 'cause that's what my cutie mark is telling me."

In the My Little Pony universe, a cutie mark is a symbol on both an individual pony's thighs, representing their special talent and interest. Chris's "special talent", it seems, is being a tomgirl. Before the Tomgirl Saga, Chris likely would have defined himself by his art or perhaps his love quest, but at this point seems to be anchoring his entire personality to his tomgirl status. Somewhat ironic is the fact that despite the implication of tomgirlhood being his special talent, Chris is a very, very unconvincing tomgirl.

In a leaked video released on 25 February 2012, Chris was spotted showing off a drawing on his left thigh which he calls his "cutie mark". It is the combination of the two gender symbols, surprisingly not having anything to do with Sonichu for once. It does not seem to be a real tattoo, but instead is drawn on, most likely with his felt-tip pens.

OCs

Merchandise

This article is still yet to be completed due to stress.

We get a lot of stressful torture in our lives that makes us crash into slumber. Given that inspiration is a big variable, and we may have been lacking of it, this article will be completed as soon as possible, at our own pace... HONEST!

Regardless of his considerable debts, Chris is not hesitant to splash out his monthly tugboat on unnecessary Pony merch. The following is a list of known My Little Pony merchandise purchased by Chris:

Item	Description	Reference
Rainbow Dash doll	See reference.	^[4]
My Little Pony: Equestria Girls Triple Play Blu-ray	Chris uses the Blu-ray as a reference when explaining that his Lego MHS was partly inspired by the MLP spinoff.	^[5]
Vinyl Scratch glasses	As seen in the pepper spray video, Chris likely bought this toy set (or similar) which came paired with the glasses.	^[6] ^[7]
Fluttershy t-shirt	Also known as "The Clopper".	^[8] et al.
My Little Pony: Equestria Girls Minis (at least 3)	Chris created his Christine Doll using parts from Vinyl Scratch and Fluttershy "Minis". He also bought a spare Vinyl to pose the dolls together.	^[9]
Sonic Rainboom t-shirt	See reference.	^[10] et al.
I'm Done Adulting. Let's Be Pony t-shirt	See reference.	^[11]
Fluffle Puff plushy (with bag)	Plushie of a popular fan fiction character (BronyCon 2017).	^[12]
Guardians of Harmony Fan Series: DJ Pon-3 figurine	Blocked by Nowacking, Chris bought this for the VA as part of a failed truce (BronyCon 2018).	^[13]
My Little Pony Quilt Set	See references.	^[14] ^[15]
Various Funko POP! MLP Vinyl figures	Among which is Princess Celestia and Discord.	^[16] et al.
Princess Luna plushy	See reference.	^[16]
Fallout: Equestria Bottlecaps	Chris bought these from an online artist because they were "affected by the convention cancellations".	^[17]

In the comic

Sonichu #12-9 front cover

Like any eight-year-old girl with the hopes of marrying a blue prince in a fairytale wedding with her favorite pony by her side, Sonichu Special #2 reveals to its unfortunate readers that Chris might have harbored similar thoughts, as his ideal wedding also features a My Little Pony menagerie.

After having received a blessing from the best [wo]man Sarah Nicole Hammer, the recently united Chris and Ivy leave the church where the wedding was held in a carriage pulled by what many trolls speculate to be a badly-drawn Rainbow Dash, which is harnessed to the carriage with what appears to be the Boulder Badge from Pokémon.

In Sonichu #12 Robee performs the "Sonic Rainboom", a stunt performed in the show when Rainbow Dash goes fast and makes a rainbow. In a bonus epilogue set in Ponyville, Night Star introduces DJ Jamsta and Lolisa Rosechu, who perform "Love is Love" live in concert.

Chris' passion for both his comic series and My Little Pony came together in 2017, when he announced work on the Pony-centric comic, Sonichu #12-9. He revealed that #12-9—formerly labeled Sonichu #13 because superstition—would include the self-described fan-fiction but potentially canon life story of Night Star.^[18]^[19]

The comic follows Night Star as she overcomes hurdles similar to the inspiring franchise, with a dash of Chris' naïve take on romance. As per previous issues, a number of story elements were influenced by contemporary sagas, including Jessica Quinn and the Idea Guys. Several members of the Mane Six and Discord appeared as cameos throughout the story. Characters from the movie, mostly Captain Celaeno and Tempest Shadow, even played a major role in the plot in the fourth part of the comic.

Aside from a Special, which was used to iron out Ben Saint's canon-defying comic, Night Star makes a brief appearance in the next issue of Sonichu.

Gallery

The Original Brony

The Gallery of My Little Pony Straightness
Chris' creation	Original	TCG card	Notes
The original Cheroki-Chan, made with Chris's own hair and Crayola Fuckin' Model Magic The improved store-bought Cheroki-Chan	Pony in Seaspray Pose		Chris's depiction of himself as a pony...or rather, a horse- too awesome to be a common pony. Just as Chris, Cheroki-Chan has a few quirks, likes to draw and color, but above all, he is noble and honorable. Cheroki-Chan "creams" of finding a sweetheart for himself, yet is having problems, mainly from being rejected once by that multi-green pony, possibly camouflaged.
Camo-Flage	Pony in Rainbow Dash pose		Representation of Megan Schroeder. She rejected Cheroki-Chan's advances, and she is Jonhlamence's little sister.^[20]
Mimmbo Bo Boruto	Pony in Rainbow Dash pose		Custom pony based on and made for Daniel Mimms. Naruto is another inspiration.
Squall Metal Alchemest	Pony in Rainbow Dash pose		An inter-dimensional pony with motherly issues. Based on Edward Elric from Fullmetal Alchemist, though part of the name may come from Squall Leonhart of Final Fantasy VIII.
Crystal	Pony Cutie Keen Bean		Commemorative pony of Crystal, Chris's future daughter.
Jonhlamence's cyberwarrior	Pony in Rarity Unicorn Pose		Camo-flage's older brother combined with the Pokémon Salamence. Based on Megan's brother John.
Ty Game	Pony in Rainbow Swirl Pose		Gamer Pony. A Christmas gift for Tyler, the son of Tony the Gym Leader.
Bee Riana	Ponies Toola-Roola (left) and Meadowbrook (right)		When he bought the two-Ponies-set, Chris took Toola-Roola's antennae and put them on Meadowbrook to create Bee-Riana. A gift for Briana, one of the daughters of Gym Leader Tony.
Educait	Pony in Sunny Daze Pose		A nerdy Pony. It is of the Wallflower type. A gift for Caitlyn, the youngest daughter of Tony the Gym Leader.
Honeysumerah	Pony in Sweet Breeze Pose		Based on a shallow Pop Star. "Stickler for a tickler" comes from a throwaway Family Guy gag, from "When You Wish Upon a Weinstein".
Modest Manna	Pony in Sweet Breeze Pose		Mormon pony.
Linnhadey	Pony in Beachberry Pose		'Unique and Lovin' it' Pony. Based on Linnea, Anna's friend and co-worker.
Federico	Pony in Beachberry Pose		Spanish Pony. He is annoying because "chicos are chicos." Most likely based on Federico Venegas, a young Spanish boy who Chris, for unknown reasons, befriended despite Federico being 14 years younger than him.^[21]
Buttonbeck	Pony in Diva Pose		Generic soulless and flavorless Pony.