Difference between revisions of "Sonichu Entertainment of America"

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(this wasn't Chris's idea)
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{{quote|Let's make Sonichu and Rosechu great again!|Christian Weston Chandler for [[Wikipedia:Donald Trump presidential campaign, 2016|President]]}}
#redirect [[Announcement 04/16/2016‎]]
 
'''Sonichu Entertainment of America (SEA)''' is Chris's small business company that started on [[Announcement 04/16/2016| April 16th, 2016]].  It is a pre-IPO, global entertainment and media company which will be hosted by [http://www.zazzle.com/ Zazzle] selling [[Sonichu 8|fun for the whole family]].  This is a step up for Chris taking advantage of his Internet fame and [[Sonichu| his original creation]].  Sonichu Entertainment of America is an [[Homos| Equal Opportunity]] employer.  It is (by Chris's logic) an 8A [[Tomgirl| woman]]-owned small business.  Chris shut down his [[Etsy]] shop shortly after announcing the company, possibly indicating that he believes Zazzle to be a better outlet for selling his Sonichu junk, as well as T-shirts, hats, mugs, and other products.
 
==Reason for Creation==
[[Chris and the industry|Most people]] start a small business to provide services and innovation.  Although Chris wants to expand his clientele, the chief reason for the formation of the business is because producing the insipid crap to sell online is starting to feel a bit like work, and he wants some henchmen to do the actual work for him. Watching the "launch" video reveals in very short order that he wants any and all employees to be women so he can fuck them, although of course Chris claims his aim was to focus more on drawing the comics as well as focusing on his transition from being a Female Lesbian Soul to Full Woman Lesbian. 
 
==Help Wanted==
Chris is in essence looking for artists who could reproduce [[Chris and art|his masterpieces]] and sell them, Chris naturally believing that a career artist would be required to reproduce his hideous childish art.
==Positions and Job Descriptions==
===''Artist''===
An "artist" would create the Amiibos and medallions.  Basically an assembly worker making Sonichu crap.
====Description====
*"Learn" from Chris-chan about assembling Amiibos and medallions.
*Create potential prototypes
*Collaborate with Chris about new ideas
====Qualifications====
*Love and adore the adventures of Sonichu and Rosechu
*Be experienced with arts and crafts
*[[R.L. Stine|Eighth grade reading level]]
*Have similar traits to Chris-chan but [[Chris and his ego|not in totality]]
===''Animators/Video production assistants''===
This position would help with creating the animated or CGI Sonichu cartoon series and hopefully not end up like the [[Sonic Boom Protests|blue-armed bandit]].
====Description====
*Create a cartoon or CGI animated Sonichu cartoon with Chris having total creative control and voicing himself and Sonichu.
====Qualifications====
*[[CADD|Be able to make a cartoon]]
===''Romantic coordinator''===
A romantic coordinator is a [[Hooker incident|professional matchmaker]] that Chris would actually pay for and [[Honest Content|trust]].  He claimed he was too [[Mass debating|busy]] to handle this himself. He mentioned that his "associate" wrote this section, in what is an obvious lie but a rare instance of Chris being seen to have shame.
====Description====
*Compete with the lesbian love market and find Chris a [[sweetheart]]
*Create a course in women's self-defense/martial arts, [[Date Ed|dating education]], and lesbian sexual positions.
*Escort Chris in certain [[Fridays After Five|public events]]
*Fight  against trolls
====Qualifications====
*Be [[Chris and health|fit and in shape]]
*Be a [[The Incredible Lioness|femme fatale]]
==Salary and benefits==
*25% of the profits.
*[[Chris and his ego|Exclusive access]] to Christian Weston Chandler himself
*Talks of [[Chris and negotiation|collaboration]]
*Access to private company promotions, conventions, and company slumber parties (tbd)
*Chance of romantic encounter with the boss
 
Anyone interested could send a Youtube video as a video resume or send [[Chris's resume|a resume]] to his gmail account.
 
Chris would be paying these people 25% of all profit each, presumably meaning if he had any more than three employees he wouldn't be making any money himself (and what existing profit there is is less than a single person could live on, let alone several people). Although the "artist" and animator positions were advertised to people of either sex, Chris very obviously wants to work with women so he can seduce them.
 
There are more than a few problems with the creation and advertisement of these positions, chiefly the allusion to romantic advances as a supposed perk of the position. Not only would that creep out potential employees, it would also be considered [[Chris and the law|sexual harassment]], especially with Chris's history [[Catherine|with]] [[Megan|dating]]. It comes as some surprise that two of the three positions are open to [[Jerks|men]], with only Romantic Coordinator being a female-only position.
 
==Future==
There is no chance whatsoever of anybody applying for these positions as a serious job venture. There is, however, an extreme likelihood that [[trolls]] will use these job "opportunities" as chances to get close to Chris, which Chris hasn't realised, naturally. As an actual business, even with Chris as its only employee, it is doomed - aside from negligible profits, Chris is plagiarising literal hundreds of instances of intellectual property, and while he's being doing that for years, now he's actually trying to profit off of it.

Latest revision as of 09:48, 21 July 2020

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