User talk:Beat/Sandbox

Chris and Remorse

Yeah, you're on to something interesting here. The pattern of long-winded explanations in his apologies is clear -- see also his excruciating descriptions of sex acts for Megan back in the day. One of the crucial components of a good self-delusion is the belief that everyone else thinks exactly like you do, or would if you just had the chance to explain things... Dkaien 18:50, 3 November 2009 (CET)

Good so far. I think a key component of his "remorse" is that, over and over again, he's really just sorry that he got caught. This is very similar to the behavior of small children, who often fail to understand the difference between the mechanistic action-and-reward system of apologizing and averting trouble, and genuinely regretting a past error. Yet another example of the fact that Chris's only real problem is that he sees the world through the eyes of a five-year-old. Pretty much all of his fucked-up misadventures can be traced back to that. Sygerrik 20:16, 3 November 2009 (CET)

Chris's Closed Mind

I like what you're putting together. I was actually starting to write up an article intended to be something like, "Chris and Hypocrisy," to discuss all the things Chris does and is okay with, but then turns around and condemns others for doing the same things. I hadn't gotten far, but I'd planned to touch on some of the same things you're discussing here. Alteceastlansing 06:53, 3 December 2009 (CET)

Chris and Hypocrisy is awesome, so I'm just gonna see if I can incorporate what I've written here into it. It's entirely possible however that taking that action would just make Chris and Hypocricy LESS awesome, so I might just delete this altogether.--Beat 01:58, 14 December 2009 (CET)

Asperchu

If we have a main namespace article, this should really be called "Asperchu." We're more interested in what actually is invoking Chris's rage and not the guy himself. Instead, what I suggest is we have an Asperchu article which is somewhat along the lines of what you're going at here (documenting the relationship between Chris and Asperchu) while maintaining the Fan page where readers can read more about specifics of Asperchu (characters, plots, etc.). --Champthom 03:08, 11 January 2010 (UTC)

Asperchu already redirects to Fan:Asperchu. I figured that since Chris was screaming for Alec's death, that made him a notable troll. Still, I guess I can tweak it a little bit to be about Asperchu instead of Alec.--Beat 03:29, 11 January 2010 (UTC)

I really like the page so far, though Champthom is right that it should be focused on Asperchu first and Alec second. ALBASPERCHU 10:30, 11 January 2010 (CST)

When the man himself tells you to rewrite it, I fucking rewrite it! This shouldn't take long.--Beat 16:42, 11 January 2010 (UTC)

Your observations on Wild

You're exactly right. Chris cares about Wild's opinion because he thinks Wild has a personality. Remember, he thinks Bubbles has a "caring, but stern" personality when she is in fact utterly one dimensional. Same with all of the Rosechus and it's not a far cry that the Sonichus suffer the same fate. He doesn't have to show us their personalities because he already knows that, so we should as well. Chris is, after all, the guy who expected us to know what he dreams about.

Chris doesn't want to off Simonla because then he'd fear that Wild would come after him(Kind of like Xent's Magi-chan fic), and he'd have to kill Wild too. Then the Combo might try to kill him for murdering their leader, and he'll have to kill them and all of their satellite characters. Reginald, Layla, Blake, Silvana...then Sonichu would protest the murder of his friends and attack Chris, so he'd have to kill him. And then Chris will have made Rosechu a widow, and he'll have to kill her, as Crystal was not a Pokemon in the dream and Rosechu cannot be his sweetheart. And then he'll have to kill her kids so they won't be orphans, thus offing Crystal.

Tl;dr, if he kills Simonla he'll go on a murderous rampage and eventually kill the Sweetheart Sue and the Crystal Sue.

• A little far fetched, but I think that its a good idea to try and cause something similar ourselves. What if we didn't stop at Simonla though? What if we took something precious to Chris and blackmailed him with it? What if we go beyond Evan's forcing him to kill Simonla and just force him to destroy the entire fucking town? There goes his safe haven, and then he'll be forced to face the real world. I propose a vote. All in favour of nuking CWCVille say Aye. --Edward 19:26, 13 February 2010 (UTC)

• That would be nice, but what hurts Chris more? Knowing that his safe haven is now a radioactive husk(the Sonees were in the "horrible death by radiation" zone and shat out their innards), or knowing that if he goes to his safe haven, Wild will be there to accuse him of murder?--MoarLurk 20:32, 13 February 2010 (UTC)

• I don't know. We are assuming a lot about Chris with the whole 'Wild will be against him thing'. He thinks they are real, sure, but he still has god like power of them, and he still dictates what their personalities are. How do we know that he won't just imagine Wild as forgiving him for it because he was blackmailed? Now if no one was alive to forgive him on the other hand, then he'd feel some kind of guilt, and no one would be able to tell him that its all ok. Beacuse, everyone will die painful deaths. --Edward 02:23, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
  • Let's put it this way--Chris once had to take Ivy and Panda out of the comic and his first reaction was "KILL THEM BOTH". Chris was confronted with bullshit accusations of Rosechu being a former male Raichu and his first thought was "QUICK, LIE YOUR WAY OUT". He'll never pick the most rational approach to anything, and despite his godlike power/allies he's very bad at using it to his advantage in situations where they really would have helped. There are at least three things he can do to fix this and he can't think to do any of them.

1. Kill Simonla and magic Wild into moving on. 2. Use the reboot as an excuse to replace her with a new character(He doesn't even need to think of one, the mailbags gave him three Rosechu OCs and there are more on DA). 3. Have her evolve into another character entirely--Pokemon cannon can justify total personality and appearance changes and Hobo Chris could use his powers to make everyone think she was always like this.

Chris is too stupid to just make Wild move on and as with everything else uses his "pure gold on first try" approach.--MoarLurk 03:18, 14 February 2010 (UTC)

Well, Evans just released the new pages of Simonlas death. Her toilet explodes. Its the most hilarious thing I have EVER seen in my life. Now just think how hilarious the nuking of CWCVille could be? Eh? Anyway, hes already killed Simonla, meaning he'll get that whole guilt thing from Wild. Now we can force him into nuking CWCVille at a later date. This way he experiences both pains; The trauma of dealing with an emotionally broken Wild who blames him for Simonla's death and shortly after Wild finally moves on, he'll have to nuke the whole town. Now won't that make Chris feel bad? --Edward 04:22, 14 February 2010 (UTC)

• Wild is going to run off and murder Simonchu or Evan or Liquid or Jason. After that, Chris will feel better. Hopefully Evan heads him off before he does the predictable. It'll hurt him because we're saying "No Chris, YOU CANNOT DO THAT", the words he hates the most.--MoarLurk 04:33, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
• I wouldn't call his mental fortress impregnable. Plus, if he tries to create a character that is exactly like Simonla in any way Evan will be pissed again. Also, Chris is attempting to vent his rage at Evan via the comic. Ban him from doing so and he'll have to vent at the PSEye.--MoarLurk 07:24, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
  • You gotta remember, we're talking about the inside of Chris's head here. It's a pretty fucked up place, but it's still one he's in control of. I doubt there's anything we can do on the internet that will make CWCville an uncomfortable place for him to be. He'll either toss up the mental block or jump through whatever hoops he needs to to make sure it's still his happy place.--Beat 07:30, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
    • This is the part of the head that's easiest to understand--the comic has always been his way of coping with people who piss him off. Everyone from Wes to Alec gets beaten up or vilified and Chris probably copy/pastes this onto his actual memories. When he can't do that or doesn't feel like drawing, he rages at the internet.--MoarLurk 07:44, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
    • I think its genius. Remember, he literally thinks that his comic and CWCVille are entirely real. He relieves his stress by venting in the comic, because he knows that in real life he has no such power over people. Wes, Mary, Bagget, Alec, Jason, ect. He does these things to them in CWCVille because he can't do that in real life, and lets face it, if he did do that kind of shit in real life (such as destroying a building with people still inside it) then he would be executed as a terrorist. Now what if we anchored him to the real world? If Evan's influence in the real world managed to stop Chris from doing his will in CWCVille, it would destroy him. Then we should go with my idea afterwards and nuke CWCVille. I'm determined to see that hellhole become a smoking crater! --Edward 15:44, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
    • I'm not sure if nukes are the effect we're going for--he'll just claim another CWCville was blown up or something. I know Chris hates impotence--he hates losing contests because he uses them to validate his self-worth. Right now, he's probably thinking "Heh heh, DIE YOU EVAN, DIEEEEEEEE! YOU SHOULD LEARN NOT TO DEFY A GOD!" as he draws Wild murdering him. If Evan came up and said "Chris, by the way, you lose your website again if you attempt to include me or any of my characters in your comic", he'll be forced to scream on Youtube.--MoarLurk 18:42, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
      • We will remedy this situation then, by making sure that Chris dedicates multiple pages to proving that its the real CWCVille. And as far as Wild and Evan go, he probably is. Wild is hardly going to go and kill Mary Lee Walsh for Simonlas death, is he? Chris has gotten rid of his villians now. If his mailbag ansew is to be accepted, and people like Wes Iseli and the Manajerks were also 'cured' by Chris, then he now has only three villians; Silvana, who we already know will later join Chirs, Clawdorf and Metal Sonichu/Count Graduon. So hes going to have Wild defeat either one of those three, or an Evan stand-in. --Edward 21:17, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
      • Evan's trying to head him off at the pass, so we'll either get RAGE or Chris trying to cheat. Oh, and you forgot Gio and Robotnik. If Chris had common sense, he'd blame the bombing on Team Rocket and kill some random mook. But he doesn't, and if we force him to kill the mook the mook will turn out to be Evan.--MoarLurk 21:27, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
      • Sounds like what Chris would do. And I really don't count Gio or Robotnik because i'm fairly sure that Chris has completely forgotten about their existance. Not that he hasn't forgotten about the existance of every Character who is either him or one of the main Hedgehog boys, but still...--Edward 22:12, 15 February 2010 (UTC)

IRC THING

So the grayed out technical lines worked better in my head than they do onscreen, and I'm at a total loss as to what I should color all these guys. Still, anything's better than horizontal scrolling.--Beat 17:11, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

FUCK YOU JANUARY 3 YOU'LL BE THE DEATH OF ME.--Beat 23:07, 13 March 2010 (UTC)

Chris and Patriotisim!

Champthom says it can't be done. He's probably right, but I'm gonna tool around with it anyway. There's not a lot that can be said about Chris's nonexistent politics, but does have a lot of very strange views on how the US operates that might make an interesting read if done properly.

Also, why is my sandbox talkpage so long?--Beat 15:55, 16 April 2010 (UTC)

I think the possible patriotism article could include a section on Thomas Jefferson, as a particularly hilarious segment of Sonichu 10 had Magi-Chan standing in front of an American flag wondering what Thomas Jefferson would think of the Asperpedia people.Ganondorfdude11 21:30, 16 April 2010 (UTC)

Another thing, Chris also has weird views on other countries as well. His war paint video, kilt video, and Christian Love Day video belie his cultural ignorance. That seems to be a theme in his "patriotism." He thinks that invoking a patriotic sentiment gives credence to his position, even when he doesn't know anything about the culture or country he is invoking. Ganondorfdude11 21:33, 16 April 2010 (UTC)

I'm trying to keep speculation to a minimum here, but the line about how Chris would have been shot or put to work in a camp gets to me a little bit. To the best of my knowledge, any stable, developed nation (The US, Canada, The vast Majority of Europe, Japan, Australia, essentially anywhere with a stable government, good infrastructure, and without massive amounts of poverty,) Chris would likely grow up to be very similar to the way he is now. Giant useless manbabys exist in pretty much every nation where daily life isn't a grave hardship.

Had he been born in a developing, war-torn, or otherwise miserable nation, I figure there's two distinct possiblities. One would be that he wouldn't have survived past Childhood, either because his autisim caused him to wander into a dangerous situation, or because the way he acted put others at risk. The second is that the constant Hardship would beat the laziness out of him, and he would become much like every other person growing up there.

That said, this is all useless speculation. I'm just typing all this as I try to find a way to say Chris is lucky he's an american without inviting a thousand edits claiming that he's as he is BECAUSE he's American. It's a factor, sure, but I don't think he'd be significantly different had he been born in Bristol England or Auckland New Zeland.--Beat 19:02, 2 May 2010 (UTC)

I think even the stars & bars flag would be inaccurate; sure he's a bigoted redneck but even they find his views extreme (CWCville would hardly be the best example of "states rights"). Would a swastika be invoking Godwin's law too much? Or maybe a Soviet or Chinese flag, I don't know, something to reflect his totalitarian views. Bill Lumburg 20:30, 2 May 2010 (UTC)