Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2
Shortly after the Jack Thaddeus Phone Call was released, a second one was released as well.
Transcript
Chris: Hello?
Jack: [Using a mocking high-pitched voice] Hi Chris, it's me, Kim.
Chris: No it's not.
Jack: Oh oh oh, okay I-I guess you saw through my ruse, Chris. You know. It's me Jack, your best friend... Are we friends Chris?
Chris: Hmm
Jack: Hmm?
Chris: Whatever, I don't know, but anyways what's up.
Jack: What? What do you mean- what do you mean "whatever"? What do you mean "whatever"?[Chris tries to interrupt] Goddammit man, anyways I got shit on Clyde. You-you wanna know.. you wanna know it?
Chris: Okay, what do you have on Clyde?
Jack: Well, first of all, he wears glasses.
Chris: Okay, he wears glasses.
Jack: Yeah
Chris: Go on
Jack: Second of all, he likes pokémon... for some reason. His favorite pokéman is Bidoof.
Chris: Okay ... Bidoof, okay.
Jack: Bidoof!
Chris: Yes, I know what a Bidoof is.
Jack: Yeah-eh, I'm sure you are a Bidoof
Chris: Okay well-
Jack: He also likes Sonic...
Chris: Okay.
Jack: and uh... let me see what else does he... hmm. Well Chris, that's- I guess that's all that I'm gonna tell you for now, but how was your day? I saw you made a video.
Chris: What?
Jack: I saw you made a video.
Chris: Yeah okay... Yeah, a holiday greeting video.
Jack: Uh-huh, have- I have a question Chris... Have you ever heard of St. Mary's Hospital?
Chris: St. Mary's Hospital, I have heard that name before-
Jack: In Richmond, Virginia.
Chris: Okay, so that's where- so that's where it's located.
Jack: Yes
Chris: Alright
Jack: From 1989 to 1999, I lived in Richmond.
Chris: Okay.
Jack: You also lived in Richmond.
Chris: Yeah, but I not live that-that long a time. I lived there shorter-shorter length than you... Obviously, because I lived there from '92 to 2000. Which-uh-which is like, that's like- 8
Jack: That doesn't matter, I was still in the same fucking city as you at the same time. And something else, my mother worked in the cathlab at St. Mary's.
Chris: Okay.
Jack: Now, I hear that Bob had bypass surgery. Is this true?
Chris: Yes he did.
Jack: When was this?
Chris: This was quite a few years ago, during that- during that decade.
Jack: Interesting, did- did he get it done at St. Mary's?
Chris: Hmm, I'm not sure wha- I'm not sure it was St. Mary's, uh, it was the hospital closest to uh Cloverleaf Shopping Center.
Jack: uh
Chris: That's- uh- that's a good way of describing its location anyway.
Jack: Well... o-okay I was- anyways, yeah, my mother might have operated on you father... isn't that creepy?
Chris: Okay... [Chris speaks away from the phone] Yes mom? Mom [Indistinct]
Jack: Uh-oh, UH-OH, uh-oh oh. Snorlax
Chris: 'sup mom?
Jack: [Mockingly impersonating Chris] Hi mommy, hmm. I just wanna cuddle up into your fat rolls, hmm. Yeah, hmm, yeah, [Mockingly hums like Chris while indistinct conversation happens in background, then snickers to himself] .
Chris: Okay, okay sorry about that, my mom was checking in.
Jack: [Still impersonating Chris] It's your mommy, hmm?
Chris: [Oblivious to mocking] Yeah well she wants me let the cat- let- let the cat in 'cus it's going to be very cold tonight... Uh, so anyway you're saying you mother might have operated on my father?
Jack: Yes.
Chris: Okay, well okay that's good.
Jack: I find that very creepy. I might have even run into you while you lived in Richmond.
Chris: Huh. Well, I wouldn't have known it or I wouldn't remember it at this time. So it's a possibility, yes. hmm.
Jack: That's interesting.
Chris: What-
Jack: Have you ever thought about moving out of your house?
Chris: Eventually, maybe.
Jack: Where would you want to move?
Chris: I'm not sure right now, but I would say that- I would say a nice little house in Charlottesville.
Jack: Pfft, you afford a place in Charlottesville? That's funny.
Chris: Hmm.
[Ends at 4:55]