Main Page

Welcome to the CWCki! The encyclopedia about Christian Weston Chandler . WHERE NO SHIT IS TOO MINOR! We currently have 2,622 articles...and counting! *Any names, or persons, discussed in this wiki, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise parodic.*

Da Update It is January 2019. For all current updates about Chris, visit the Kiwi Farms. Presently, the CWCki lacks enough editors to maintain all of its updates, leading to "Da Update" being discontinued on 11 October 2018. Articles are still updated when possible by the remaining editors. Unfortunately, registration for new users has been disabled since 21 August 2018, due to abuse from spambots.

Quote of the Now “ To the individual taking the recent pictures of me, we have cameras, and we know what car you drive. We will not release your license plates. But the puzzle pieces were easy to put together. Square mirrors, and that was not even my car in the mirror. Plus the time you u-turned and took my picture. Point is, I really do not like photos of me being taken without my prior consent, in stores or anywhere, period. I can very well easily go to the proper people, including store management or authorities, with the respective footage and find you. So, to this guy and the rest of you, Please Stop taking pictures or videos of me behind my back and without my consent. Thank you. ⚡️💙⚡️ ” Chris

Begging Counter Do not donate to or buy anything from Chris: he lies about needing money and habitually neglects his customers and supporters (and worse). It has been… 221 days since Chris last begged for money. Record Streak: 1,060 days 285 days since Chris last uploaded pages to meet his (formerly) paid obligations to the Sonichu comic. Record Streak: 1,705 days 5,365 days since Chris last applied for a job. Record Streak: 5,365 days An Etsy customer gambled that Chris would deliver and lost, still bitter over it three years later. Article of the Now SLGBTQ is a CWC-ism variant of the more common acronym LGBTQ, an acronym for "lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer". Chris coined his variant on the term sometime in April or May 2017 but did not explain the reasoning behind his alteration until a Facebook post on 21 May 2017. He has since used the term consistently in contexts where most people would use the more conventional acronym, cementing its CWC-ism status. The "Q", for the blanket terms "queer" or "questioning", is a reasonably common addition by modern activists. Chris paid fairly little attention to the letter in his explanation; he likely picked it up from organizations such as the Human Rights Campaign or Cville Pride, both of whom routinely include it. More notable is Chris's inclusion of an "S" for "straight", which he explained as being to welcome non-LGBTQ people "with open hearts". As straight people make up the vast majority of the population, Chris's new acronym covers almost everyone (with the notable exception of asexuals), thus defeating the purpose of identifying LGBTQ people as a minority group with common attributes. (More...)

Did You Know ... that even now, Chris does not think he is fat? ... that Sarah Jackson, Chris's sweetheart and a Decepticon, was brutally murdered by Optimus Prime? ... that Chris loves to give dating advice to high schoolers in spite of never having been on a real date as a teenager or an adult? ... that Chris repeatedly dreamt his sweetheart amid a watery maze? ... and that Chris expects his fans to know what happens in his dreams? ... that Chris recorded himself screaming at a toilet? ... that Chris has a fourth love doll, Yumi? ... that Chris claims to weigh 216 pounds? ... that Sega knows about Chris's attempts to change Sonic's arms back? ... that Chris rates jail a 2/5? This Day in Christory Today in Christory, in 2010, Chris visited the Charlottesville Best Buy and spent $60.87 on Nintendo DS games and a pink memory card. (more...)

Picture of the Now

Video of the Now Click to load content