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Welcome to the CWCki!

The encyclopedia about Christian Weston Chandler .

WHERE NO SHIT IS TOO MINOR!

We currently have 2,622 articles...and counting!

*Any names, or persons, discussed in this wiki,
that may seem similar to anyone in real life,
are purely coincidental, or otherwise parodic.*

Da Update
It is December 2018. For all current updates about Chris, visit the Kiwi Farms. Presently, the CWCki lacks enough editors to maintain all of its updates, leading to "Da Update" being discontinued on 11 October 2018. Articles are still updated when possible by the remaining editors. Unfortunately, registration for new users has been disabled since 21 August 2018, due to abuse from spambots.

Quote of the Now

“	Mmmmm... I'm not acknowledging you right now.	”
Chris in his most recent sighting.

Begging Counter

Do not donate to or buy anything from Chris: he lies about needing money and habitually neglects his customers and supporters (and worse). It has been…

215

days since Chris last begged for money.

Record Streak: 1,054 days

279

days since Chris last uploaded pages to meet his (formerly) paid obligations to the Sonichu comic.

Record Streak: 1,699 days

5,359

days since Chris last applied for a job.

Record Streak: 5,359 days

An Etsy customer gambled that Chris would deliver and lost, still bitter over it three years later.

Article of the Now

The Father Call is a phone call that occurred on 4 November 2009. In this call, Solid Chris spends 2 hours on the phone with Matthew Devoria (born 1957), the father of his would-be sweetheart Kacey, and a retired U.S. Marine who served in the Gulf War. Chris uses the opportunity of speaking to the dad of his sweetheart by boasting of his now-legendary honesty, before flimsily attempting to defend himself from an angry father.

Their conversation is illuminating. What follows is probably the bluntest personal assessment Chris has ever received to date: Matt berates Chris for his laziness, egotism, lack of empathy, inability to grow up, unhealthy lifestyle, obesity, treatment of Kacey and general failure at life. To this day, Chris has never taken any of Matt and Kacey's advice to heart; throughout the call he retorts by saying that he leads a hard life, which includes such laborious tasks as doing menial chores, mowing the lawn and cleaning the house. He also claims to be strong and that he exercises regularly, as well as eating healthy by going to McDonald's only once per week and shoving vegetables down his throat.

(More...)

Did You Know

... that Chris had unintentionally rickrolled the internet with his song for PandaHalo?
... that this webiste, the CWCki, is a LOAD OF BULL?
... that Chris got married... to five of his imaginary friends and an enabler-made OC?
... that God and Jesus told Chris that Blanca was to be his TRUE and HONEST sweetheart?
... that a Forgiveness Blessing can counter the extreme bad luck and misfortune associated with the Curse-ye-ha-me-ha attack?
... that Uri Geller, a famed magician, tried to give Chris a reality check when he sought psychic training?
... that Chris is capable of taking care of himself?
... that Chris once attended a Relationship Management Class intended for couples?
... that Bob wanted Chris to shut that goddamn thing off?
- ... and that Chris was working on it!?
... that Chris did not discover masturbation until the age of 16?

This Day in Christory

Today in Christory, in 2001, Chris embarks upon the long journey of racking up over $2000 worth of debt on his credit card on eBay, also leaving him open to more forms of trolling, and purchases of My Little Ponies.

(more...)

Picture of the Now

Video of the Now