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Please keep discussion strictly to the improvement of the article. You can discuss the content at PVCC, /cwc/, and if you're desperate, the ED forums. Please see CWCki:NOTAFORUM


Seriously, this isn't a place to discuss trolling plans, how Chris is stupid, etc. The forums above are the place to do it. This should be in regards to improving the article. The article has been lock until ~1600 GMT 01 September 2009.


It's not a Captain's Log because Chris is apparently too angry. I called it what the CWCville Library calls it but if anyone wants to change it, so be it. --Champthom 14:19, 28 August 2009 (CEST)

For those who care to know, this is where the title came from for the Library. Not necessary for the page, but just throwin' that out there. Shiny 23:49, 7 November 2009 (CET)


So wait, does this mean the other Captain's Logs AREN'T dead serious? Damn, I just got all of Vivian G's information and was on the phone with the cops for them to track her and her false merchandise down, but now that I see it's a false alarm, I'll go draw grotesque images of Sonees and Rosees being mutilated, because that apparently isn't a big deal either. Evang7 15:31, 28 August 2009 (CEST)

Christ on a cracker that was scary. Not in that he's even remotely intimidating, but in that he thinks throwing a tantrum will force the universe to obey his whims. The poor stupid bastard. Ensign disposable 16:16, 28 August 2009 (CEST)

I think it just kind of shows how babied and spoiled he is/was by his parents The Snorlax - despite all that he's been through (regarding things getting online), his first resort is to scream, make pathetic threats that everybody knows he isn't going to follow through with, and stamp his feet. What a pathetic man-baby. Dammerung

I think it's a reaction to the stuff that's been getting sent to his house, I personally sent him anywhere in between 540,000 USPS boxes or 560,000 USPS boxes, my other troll friend has sent him a lot of Qur'an's and bowlflex dvd's. Some others that I know sent him magazine subscriptions, Tempurepedic kits, signed him up for junk mail, etc, etc. It's quite clear that this is a reaction to his own stupidity and releasing his dox for us slanderous trolls to cause a shitstorm with. --Spookycupcakes 16:31, 28 August 2009 (CEST)

540,000 UPS boxes? That's pretty impressive! But if that's the case, why does he particularly want us to remove the footage of his house? Dammerung
Because he thinks that we're the ones going to his house and leaving shit on his front lawn, remember, he's really, incredibly thick. Now lets see, it's been about a week and a half since he released his dox (in the exact same order as you would need to fill out an ebay form lol), and I started sending him USPS boxes with iMacros for the next 24 hours or so, so he must be recieving them just now, along with the other stuff too. I sent them as "Ian Brandon Anderson", so things must be getting pretty spicy in the chandler residence.--Spookycupcakes 17:24, 28 August 2009 (CEST)
  • So are you like sending him boxes on USPS's dime? I hope so, as opposed to spending your own money. Somebody should tell him that he can make a pretty sweet fort with them; or perhaps take them to one of those recycling centers that actually pay you for bringing stuff in (or is that just for metal?), and he could make a little cash with them. - Needlepants 19:27, 28 August 2009 (CEST)
  • The idea of Chris building an immense fort with all of those boxes is an awesome one.Dammerung
  • Seriously, somebody needs to tell him that he should make a fort. Even tell him that's why the boxes were sent! Then we'd get a video of the fort, and it'd be supremely awesome. You know what, I'm going to tell him that he could make a fort. - Needlepants 19:47, 28 August 2009 (CEST)
  • Now you too can be like the cool kids and send him boxes, make sure you have iMacros installed too, that way it doesn't get tiresome. EDIT: It's free to send boxes, I think USPS only gets charged.--Spookycupcakes 19:33, 28 August 2009 (CEST)
  • Thanks for that, although for a different reason. I'm gonna sell some shit on eBay, and I need boxes for that. - Needlepants 19:47, 28 August 2009 (CEST)
I can't wait to see the video he'll make out of that incident. "THE MURDEROUS TROLLS ARE SENDING ME BOXES!" Dammerung
Ha, yea and I also think that his parents told him to take down everything about the house off the internet, so he's just doing everything literally. So chances are he'll leave his DOX vid up since there's no visual reference to his house. EDIT: I called up Bob and asked him if he recieved any boxes yet, and then Bob said "No, it's none of your business knowing about our mail!" and then I could overhear Chris whining to his mom, so then I said "Well Bob, Keep it up because there's only going to be more from here on out. Tell Chris I love your "Public Disclaimer" video. So then Bob told chris asking what the hell that is, and then chris' power level went over 9000 and then the telephone hung up. Pretty epic. --Spookycupcakes 17:32, 28 August 2009 (CEST)
I think things are going to get very epic soon. Maybe that'll even get a mention in issue 10, if it ever does come out. Awesome job, man! Dammerung
Issue 10: Those Slanderous Boxes! Chris gets out of the mirror and finds Cwcville flooded by boxes. He says "huh", pauses for a while, says he's leaving the mayor's post, leaving a legacy of a dysfunctional city with a brand new ecological disaster area. --wwwwolf (wake me when you need me) 20:06, 28 August 2009 (CEST)
To add insult to injury, all those boxes were sent to "Ian Brandon Anderson".--Spookycupcakes 21:06, 28 August 2009 (CEST)

This is one of those things that makes me glad my own madness is much less than his and getting treatment for. And I still actually pity him. Amazing, I know. (God damnit get this kid grown man manchild some help). - Needlepants 19:27, 28 August 2009 (CEST)

How do you help a self-centered retard who is too underdeveloped to even understand feelings of embarrassment or empathy. For crying out loud footage of him fucking a Japanese blow up doll have been leaked unto the Internet and what does he do? He just goes into his fantasy land and goes on adventures with Hedgehogs. We're dealing with a mentally deficient person make no mistake about it. And Mary Lee Walsh already tried to give him help by making him attend Anger Management and see a psychologist. Chris thanked her by demonizing her and making horrid Rule 34 of her. There is little that can be done. Crow 22:19, 28 August 2009 (CEST)
  • Stranger things have happened, although he would probably require institutionalization. If he had gotten proper help when he was younger (ie. his parents gave a damn)... well, that'd be a whole different story. I'm not trying to completely absolve him of responsibility for his (hilarious) actions, but his parents did quite a number on him by spoiling and coddling him as opposed to getting him the support that an autistic (or whatever he is) child needs, which is why things like empathy and whatnot are foreign concepts for him. If a professional ever tried to help him, it'd be a fascinating case. - Needlepants 23:37, 28 August 2009 (CEST)
  • I think that Chris has schitzophrenia, Psychosis, Agressive Schitzophrenia, and bi-polar disorder. --Spookycupcakes 01:45, 29 August 2009 (CEST)
  • As I said, it'd be a fascinating case. - Needlepants 01:48, 29 August 2009 (CEST)
  • Naw not even Chris is that fucked up. My guess is that Chris is a nice mix of autism and narcissism. I even wrote an essay about it a while back. It's still on my userpage if anyone's interested. --Hayate666 02:23, 29 August 2009 (CEST)
  • I need to read that, then... I don't think he's as messed up as Spookycupcakes says, but I think he does have some schizophrenic symptoms in the form of his various delusions, like how he is completely, utterly convinced that there's a fanbase, or that he can curse people. He's not full-blown schizo, but he seems just removed enough from reality to have some tendencies in that area. (and I still stand by the idea that institutionalization is probably the best course if he were to get legit, actual professional help, or at least a lot of therapy (like 3+ times a week kind) and possibly definitely some medication) - Needlepants 04:49, 29 August 2009 (CEST)
  • If I were to make a movie about chris, I think it would either be a combination about how Chris would percieve the world, and then how everybody percieves chris, or it'd just be a more solid adaptation of Vivitheg's novlette. I like the former. It'd definitely be an oscar grabber.--Spookycupcakes 07:05, 29 August 2009 (CEST)
  • Just a protip for everybody busy with analysing Chris: before you can pin schizophrenia on him, you need to discover a time in his life, usually somewhere around his twenties, that he was having a psychotic breakdown. This kind of breakdown usually doesn't stop without some serious medication, which he never received as far as we know. Also, don't forget that schizophrenia and autism are diagnosis's that rule each other out according to the DSM-IV, because they cause a lot of the same symptoms. It's safer to say that he just has autism than to say he has schizophrenia, because there's little to no proof for the latter. --Hayate666 21:53, 29 August 2009 (CEST)

I now feel INCREDIBLY bad for Bob and Barbara. If it was just Chris in that house, then I'd send the video out to the po-lice, but this here is just an old man trying to keep his house.

Christian Weston Chandler, you are not only a disrespectful scumbag to your parents, but you are also a legal liability to them, causing financial injury as well as shame. Granola 07:42, 30 August 2009 (CEST)

I don't feel that bad for them, after all, they seem to neglect the mess that has been created and allowed the house to get as cluttered as it is. --Osorno

This is why I hesitate sending these videos to the health department. Then again, these people are not just innocent old people, they know exactly what they are doing. Fat Nigger 08:18, 30 August 2009 (CEST)

I'm sure that as we speak, many people are getting in contact with the health department. I personally don't care about Bob and Barbara. They're lazy, stupid, negligent fucks, and they're terrible parents as well. Part of the reason why Chris is the basement-dwelling permavirgin reject of society that he is today, is that these pathetic excuses for parents gave Chris no help with his assburgers whatsoever, as he grew up. If they had given him the proper treatments, social skills training, etc Chris would probably at least have a job and income, and know how to behave properly in public, on dates, etc. He may have even matured and stopped drawing lame-ass comics of Sonic recolors half-way through his highschool years. He may have even had at least one sexual relationship. I say, let them get kicked out of their house. End this stupid trolling saga that just isn't funny anymore. Hell, maybe the health department will get Chris instituionalized at the same time. It would be very good for him, and it would keep him out of the malls where he stalks women.. --Ass40

What's so hard about... cleaning up the damn place? Just rent a dumpster, and get rid or sell everything you don't need, and find a place for the stuff you do but aren't using right now. - Needlepants 16:20, 30 August 2009 (CEST)

As Chrissy mentioned during his tour, his folks are packrats. They don't want to clean up because they can't imagine letting any of their crap go. -Schismtracer 03:28, 5 July 2010 (UTC)

I called the greene county health department, they were closed so I left a message. Then I called chris and his home phone and told them about it, but they didn't pick up so I had to settle for a message again. Sucks that my boxes and other peoples crap isn't the root of this problem, but I'm sure it'll play a part. --Spookycupcakes 18:00, 30 August 2009 (CEST)

So, did anything ever come out of this? Any visits from local services, inspectors, what have you? If not, it's a real shame, because that would have been a supreme moment in their lives. It would be like ripping a bandaid off, but at least the wounds could be attended to. Since Barbara's hospitalization, it might be possible to get a "health check."Germex 17:35, 28 October 2009 (CET)