User:Lime/Wild Mass Guessing

Mayor and frequent loiterer Christian Weston Chandler is Chris-Chan Sonichu!

It would explain why CWC is always hanging around with the Sonichus and Rosechus, why he wears that medallion around his neck, and why their names sounds so similar. They're the same person! (Sorry, I had to do this, tradition and all.)

• Man, you crazy. You so crazy.

CWC (the comic character) is in an insane asylum, and Sonichu is an account of his fantasies

The comic can't seem to figure out what 'level' of reality it works on, as within the comic itself, Sonichu is a fictional character, an Animated Actor (being 'married' outside of 'the pages' but not within?), a real being, a being created though the will of CWC, and they can cross between CWCville and the 'real world' despite CWCville supposedly located in the real-world state of Virginia. The incongruities of the entire comic just screams madness.

The entire comic is actually how Comic!Chris sees the world of Quickville

Let's look at the facts. Allison Amber pretty much does everything a Mayor ought to do while Chris dicks around with hedgehog pokemon. Odds are, Comic!Bob was the previous mayor of the city, which is really named Quickville(He sees it as CWCville in his mind), and Allison lets him hang around her office and pretend to be mayor out of pity.

Chris likely follows Sonichu and company around and is certain that they all love him. He can't transform, but he wishes he could so he could be as awesome as his hero is. All the relationships have actual depth, but since Chris is the naive manchild he is in the real world, he assumes that they are all based around sex and proving your heterosexuality.

The retconning of Mary Lee Walsh to Slaweel Ryam? That's her actual name, Sonichu got sick of Chrissy calling her Mary and tried to explain that the two were different people. Chris being Chris, he took this to mean that Slaweel was impersonating Mary. Sonichu gave up after that.

• But than, why did Darkbind help out against the "Jerkops"?
  • Chris was actually loitering around an enemy base that he thought was a McDonalds inside a Wal-Mart. Darkbind had to save him from the three giant robots Slaweel had hidden there, and Chris later decided that the robots were the managers of said Wal-Mart. He then decided that he'd fought them all off. It explains why this is the only time "Mecha-Jerkops" appear.

"Solid Chris", "Liquid Chris" and Solidius Chris (better known as David Gonterman) are all clones of the same original sample: Ed Wood

This one explains itself. Liquid Chris somehow got the better part of the deal. David Gonterman appears older due to advanced aging. Solid Chris appears to have a fondness for wearing panties, much like Ed Wood.

But why were clones of Ed Wood made? There are several possibilities:

• The scientists involved were huge fans of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and bad movies, and wished that bad movies on the level of Plan 9 would continue to be produced. It backfired, as none of them went into film.
• It was a government experiment to see if writing bad fiction was genetic. There may be more clones, and they're writing generic pulp fantasy and science fiction novels. Uwe Boll may be one as well.
• It was actually Ed Wood's plan to have spare bodies for him to possess from beyond the grave. Chris's latest video (with him talking to himself in two different voices) seems to indicate that the plan has come to fruition.

Solid Chris seems to be affected by an advanced form of the FOXDIEYOU virus. In his appearances between 2007 and today his hairline has receded, he appears to have gained lots of weight and in general he just appears older.

• Evidence against: Ed Wood was charming, hard-working, and by all accounts, a sweet guy who just had no talent. Considering how rarely Chris updates his comic, his hateful views on gay people (I don't know how he feels about transvestites like Wood, and remember, those panties were not his idea), and his generally asinine personality, he has little in common with Wood except lack of talent. If he is a clone of Wood, then that's all that carried across.
  • Solid Chris is the evil, corrupted clone whose DNA sample was corrupted by the dark fizzy substance that is cherry cola, and had poor parenting who further warped the pitiful creature. Liquid Chris is the good clone, raised in a loving home and inherited Ed Wood's good qualities. Gonterman is somewhere in between. (additionally, Chris now wears a sports bra out of his own free will)
    • Obviously, Solid Chris got all the recessive genes.
  • Perhaps Solidus Chris is Christan Humber instead.
    • But won't there still be a possibility of Solid Chris defeating Liquid?

WMG: Cly(de) Cash and most, if not all the trolls, are really an advanced-but-insane A.I.

Clyde Cash and the other trolls are not real human beings, but rather an A.I. that's gone rogue, but instead of trying to take over the world, it just trolls people on the internet. For while its builders could build a brain for it out of microchips, they couldn't build it a heart.

Sonichu is part of Instrumentality as viewed by Chris.

It's presenting a world to him where he has absolute control, in an effort to get him to let down his AT Field. Like Shinji, Chris seems pretty good at being emotionally distance, so it's not working too well.

Chris isn't real

He's a character created by a talented artist depicting the life of a tormented autist. The Chris on the the videos? It's just an actor.

• It's himself, but he's trolling everybody, pretending to be an aspie.
  • Or he does have Aspergers, but is just playing up the stereotypical traits for laughs. So he is truly high-functioning, but just acts the opposite of it for humorous effect.
    • Doesn't explain why he clearly lives with his parents in a trash-filled house.
    • They could wreck the place before making a video, to make it look like a shithole?

• Unlikely. You have to be the greatest troll ever to Forge a psychological report, an entire history, and photos of a fictional person from babyhood to 27-28 yrs. old.
  • This is WMG. "Unlikely" means nothing (or, alternatively, is the entire point).

In a continuation of the last theory, Chris's life is just an elaborate hoax

All of the videos Chris posts are part of an ongoing Vlog Series like Lonelygirl15 or Kate Modern; the videos that he takes down are archived on YouTube channels such as TheCWCvilleLibrary either by the creator himself or by an accomplice. The Sonichu comics? Not the product of a Psychopathic Manchild, but of the ingenious creator wanting to give his series a distorted backstory of sorts. All the pictures from Chris's childhood? They're mostly real save for a few edits (some of the pictures were edited to include Bob and Barbra, Chris's parents), but they belong to either Chris's actor or a totally different kid who looked similar to him. Videos showing Chris IRL, such as the infamous Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes Pokémon and McIntire Park news reports? The first and second are fake (or the former is real, but Chris's character is based on the child in the video—not my idea, someone came up with that theory in the video comments of either it or a mirror IIRC), while "Chris" walked into the third one for the lulz. Most of the major trolls, such as Clyde Cash, Vivian Gee and Liquid Chris? They're in on it. Everything else we know about Chris's life is also completely made up, and spread through sites such as Encyclopedia Dramatica and CWCki to make the series all the more authentic.

• • As much as I want to believe this (because it would be epic), how do you explain the two recorded-in-actual-legal-records arrests of CWC?
    • They're real, Chris is just that dedicated.

The Ghost Buggy shown in Sonichu 7 is actually Uboa

lol, Shameless Self Promotion.

• It would explain the creepy dimension Sammy ends up going through.

Sonichu will end with a Downer Ending due to Creator Breakdown

One day, a troll will do something to affect Chris so drastically that he is sent into a deep depression. He takes out his sorrow on his dearest creation, his comic, and all the characters die in increasingly dark and depressing ways (murder, suicide, because of a broken heart and so on) until only Chris's Author Avatar is left. With his friends all gone, comic!Chris is left with no choice but to kill himself. Basically, the ending will be like this.

Alternative: Sonichu will end with a Downer Ending due to Creator Backlash Chris either grows out of the whole Man Child thing (HA!) or ceases making comics due to the trolls like he threatened to do in a few of his videos. Out of either disgust at what he's created or troll-induced spite, he ends all the characters' lives in brutal and over-the-top ways and nukes CWCville.

Sonichu will have a GainaxEnding that combines nearly every WMG above this It will be revealed that Chris is a clone of EdWood, and he will fight Liquid Chris, DavidGonterman (Solidus Chris), and later UweBoll (Plasma Chris). Ivy will kill herself, believing that Chris had died in the battle with David Gonterman.

Liquid Chris will die, but kills Wild Sonichu and destroys the Sonichu Balls. Uwe Boll will manage to depower the Sonichu Medallion as a dying action, but the depowered Chris will brutally murder Uwe with a rusty pipe. Mary Lee Walsh (who is the attractive version the trolls use) mourns over Liquid's death, as she never got to tell him she loved him. Count Graduon approaches her with an offer of power.

Rosechu, Angelica and Bubbles will be killed by Silvana and the other evil Electric Hedgehog Pokemon; but Rosechu possesses Silvana, at last fulfilling her dream of having a pickle. Whether or not she gets to 'test drive' it is left up for debate.

Sonichu will give up his body, transferring his mind to a pickle (which grants him godhood somehow), to re-empower the Sonichu Medallion, so that Chris can defeat Count Graduon. However, this is not enough, and the Sonichu Medallion will be destroyed.

Mary Lee Walsh will refuse Count Graduon's control and absorbs his power instead, becoming a gigantic naked version of herself that starts absorbing the souls of everyone in the world, starting with [=CWCville=]. Most of the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon will be turned into fanta.

Pickle!Sonichu and Silvana!Rosechu will merge and become a divine, transcendent being named Godchu that enlightens Chris to his true nature of being Asexual; and that his Love Quest was really a Companionship Quest. Godchu then travels off to create a new universe.

With Chris' true nature revealed to himself, he loses his Virgin with Rage status, as he as always wanted... but not by losing his virginity, but rather his rage. This moment of enlightenment extends his consciousness across time and space and he contacts the various Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, including Sonichu and Rosechu (even though Sonichu and Rosechu no longer exist in the true sense). He asks for their power, but they tell him that he doesn't need their power... as he was the one who created them; he only forgot that he was God of CWCWorld due to his memory being altered by the AI Clyde Cash so that he was just the 'Mayor' of [=CWCVille=] in an effort to harness his awesome power. He is, however, still a clone of Ed Wood. We're not sure how this works.

With this, Chris' memory as a god of his fictional realm reawakened, and the answers all falling into place, he will transform into Collossal Chan, and battles the gigantic naked Mary Lee Walsh. Due to being asexual and knowing it finally, he is not distracted by MLW's Template:Gainaxing and manages to destroy her... both both Chris and Mary Lee Walsh explode into millions of soul fragments, where they land, beautiful flowers grow, even on the surface of the moon. The land in which they battled becomes a literal sea of blood.

We are then treated to CWC's mental journey as he explores how he had selfishly twisted the world, and how he does not deserve his godhood, but neither wants to give it up, but also ponders cosmic suicide, and we never learn his decision.

At the end, Liquid Chris is lying on a beach at the edge of the sea of blood, confused as to why he's still alive when Wild had just killed him. The spirits of the other Clones appear, telling Liquid that he is now the True and Honest Christian Weston Chandler, as they all decided to give up their chance at resurrection to give him the gift of life; because he could play a real guitar as opposed to Guitar Hero. Mary Lee Walsh also appears from the sea of blood, and tells Liquid she loves him, and the True and Honest Christian Weston Chandler smiles; as his Love Quest is over.

Then there are twenty pages of the comic that are just solid blocks of color, but the last page is black with one white phrase printed on it:

"...Ivy, I did it. I really did it."

WMG: Someone, somewhere, will write (or has already written) a DavidGonterman/[=CWC=] SlashFic Think about how similar the two of them are: They're both infamous on the Internet for their [=~DarthWiki/So Bad It's Horrible~=] works and their bigoted natures.hottip:!:Okay, to give Gonterman credit he's improved on both aspects. Let's have the hypothetical ship be a TimeParadox between past!Davy and present!Chris. Certainly, the two of them were made for each other. However, their love is not meant to flourish, as even the PowersThatBe cannot handle the immense amount of Template:Squick. If a fic with them as an Template:OTP were to be created, then the Internet, and maybe even the universe itself, would implode (and we won't/didn't notice). [=GodJesus=] help as all.

Also, if the above clone theory is true, said SlashFic would also be ScrewYourself clonecest. Huzzah!

WMG: Christian will become a national celebrity. The current business involving his possible eviction from his house will result in Chris finally backing up his threats of legal action and taking his situation to the courts as a harassment suit. Granted, the foundation for the case would be incredibly weak, but some slick, hotshot, JackThompson Jack Thompsonesque lawyer will manage to take the case all the way to the Supreme Court in a bid to win fame for tackling cyberbullying, TheNewRockAndRoll the new threat to American society. The case will be laughed out of court, but not before the media has spent months going over every sordid detail of Christian's life, spreading his infamy to the general public. After the case falls apart, Christian will be exploited by many tabloids, talk shows, used car commercials...basically, he'll be the new Gary Coleman. He will be a household name, forever remembered as that one guy you're glad you're not, a figure of self-parody who keeps digging himself deeper.

We expect to see terrible things from you, Mr. Chandler. Terrible, terrible things...

WMG: Christian's sexuality is Magi-chan's plaything.

Magi-Chan can bend anything; that includes sexuality.

• Huh, that would explain why he doesn't have a heartsweet...
• So she (he?) never released the cure for homosexuality into the water. That was a lie to leave Chris' guard down

WMG: TheProposition "When?" said the moon. Christian will shoot Naitsirhc to prevent him from telling schoolchildren that it is okay to be gay. Nait will quietly acknowledge "You got me, Chris." Then, in his dying state, stumble outside, sit down on a small hummock, and watch the sunset. Chris, unable to deny pity for Nait, will mumble to the children "I'm going to be with my brother." He will join Nait on the hummock and together they will watch the sun set. Nait will whisper "What are you gonna do now, Chris?" As Chris realizes that everything he knows is now gone and that he cannot think of an answer, Nait will slump to the ground, dead. Fade to black, and roll credits.

WMG: NoEnding Due to all the STRESS in Chris' life, there's a good chance he will never finish it.

• Well, he hasn't updated the comic since the end of February 2010. Supposedly he is "http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/100_2188 not going to be on the internet much", because strike:http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/CWC_Blog#26_May_2010 sitting on his dirty, crapped ass and playing video games BlatantLies being active within his community is more interesting. Since writing his comic requires more effort than filming himself raging or ranting, there's a good chance that we won't see Sonichu anymore...

WMG: Sonichu is Template:Videodrome The reading of Sonichu comics is in fact a BrownNote, causing brain tumours. It was specifically devised to attract the attention of internet trolls, give them the tumours, and kill them all, in order to protect the internet from getting "too soft". If we're lucky, Chris will be shot to death by Jason, causing his skull to erupt in cancerous growths. "Death to Sonichu!" Jason will shout, "Long live the trolls!" Jason will then stumble onto a derelict ship somewhere, where a TV message, ostensibly from Ivy but probably actually from Blanca, will tell him that he has nothing left but to commit suicide.

WMG: The people of [=CWCVille=] burn Chris (comics version) as a virgin sacrifice Think about it. He's their "king". He's a virgin. He's a fool. The townsfolk have set the whole thing up as part of a springtime festival to trick him into being a sacrifice to ensure a plentiful harvest. They will lock him inside a gigantic TheWickerMan wicker effigy and set it alight, while Sonichu himself leads the villagers in a chorus of "So Need a Cute Girl".

• Where do the bees come in?

WMG: Christian is the horrifying result of an attempt to clone DavidGonterman and ProfessionalWrestling The Ultimate Warrior We all know about the eerie similarities to Gonterman. But how else could we explain Chris's screaming, incoherent, homophobic, and occasionally violent YouTube rants than by assuming there's a little bit of The Ultimate Warrior in him, as well? And you know how Chris uses strange words or euphemisms in his comics and RealLife? Well, any AtopTheFourthWall or TheSpoonyExperiment fan can tell you that the Ultimate Warrior has, too, in his comics. ("foked", "destrucity", etc.)

Only one question remains: Who the hell would think combining those two was a good idea?

• TheSpoonyExperiment Dr. Insano
• UweBoll?

WMG: CWC is the evil counterpart to StephenFry. Fry is funny, charming, intelligent, gay, and with an interest in technology that extends to amassing thousands of followers on Facebook. CWC is funny only by accident, repulsive, stupid (and not in an autistic way), homophobic, and whose interest in technology extends only to putting crap on the internet and downloading porn. The face that Fry is British and CWC is American could be counted as another one, but that would have UnfortunateImplications. Besides which, if he were really Fry's opposite, he'd be French.

WMG: CWC is the evil counterpart to Template:XKCD Randall Munroe. Stronger similarities, including relations to a girl named Megan (which the haters have officially declared must be stalking related) and an overall lack of effort in their comics art. Munroe, however, used his influence to http://xkcd.com/481/ make the world a better place.

WMG: Chris' entire life is a defictionalized version of Kafka's Metamorphosis. Or, barring that, there are still lots of obvious parallels.

WMG: Christian is Porky Minch from Template:Mother 3

Just look at the facts:

• Both created a city centered entirely around their own ego ([=CWCville=]/New Pork City)
• Both created an artificial "son" as compensation for being unable to father one biologically (Sonichu/The Masked Man)
• Both surround themselves with mementos of an old "friend" that has long since abandoned them (Megan/Ness)
• Both are children trapped in an adult's body
• Both have neglectful and careless parents
• Both are chubby and somewhat overweight
• Both merge creatures together (The Chimera's/Sonichu)

• • As much as I like this theory, those symptoms are relatively common traits of nerdy, socially inept manchildren. (taken UpToEleven in these cases, naturally)
  • This theory is explored in more detail in http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/User:Clydec/porkypasta this copypasta.

WMG: The main trolls of Christian Weston Chandler are the heroes from Earthbound

Ness is Cylde Cash, Paula is Vivian Gee, Jeff is Liquid Chris, and Poo is Jason Kendrick Howell.

WMG: Alternatively, they are the heroes of Template:Mother 3

• Lucas=Clyde Cash
• Duster=Alec Benson Leary
• Kumatora=Vivian Gee
• Boney=???
• In that same vein, Claus could be Ryan Cash.

WMG: The reason he wants a boyfriend-free girl is because he doesn't mind a GirlOnGirlIsHot girlfriend with a girlfriend Just saying.

WMG: The Medallions of Fail are not made of clay, but rather PsychoNauts psitanium

Over the past several years, Chris-chan has become less and less sane. Psitanium makes the mentally unstable less stable. Simple as that.

WMG: Alternatively, The Medallions of Fail are Horcruxes

There are many PlotCoupons that can cause a person in possession of it to slowly lose their sanity, but Horcruxes can be disguised as retarded looking bling. Chris made the medallions long ago and they somehow got the pieces of someone's soul bound to them (seriously, who'd think to look for someone's soul in some fat moron's retarded medallion?). Ever since then they've been slowly causing Chris to lose more sanity from the limited amount he already had.

WMG: No, all of the Relics of Fail are Horcruxes.

Creating a Horcrux requires a murder. Chris murdered BILLY MAYS to make the Amnyfest Ring into a Horcrux. He caused Ryan Cash's death to make the Sonichu Medallion into a Horcrux. Mike Jackson -- the Gitar. Sarah May -- the Attraction Sign. Patti -- the SailorMoon poster. Presumably he just has to strangle Clyde Cash to make his PS3 into a Horcrux, and then take care of Liquid Chris to Horcrucise his Man-bra.

WMG: One last theory about the Medallions

They have lead paint on them, which, if true, should probably explain everything.

WMG: Liquid Chris is actually SonicX Christopher Thorndyke

As RescuedFromTheScrappyHeap his role in Season 3 indicates, had Liquid not met Sonic & company, he would have been just as annoying, if not more.

• • He comes off as more bizarro-Chris; his parents aren't ridiculously rich but middle-class at best rednecks.

WMG: ThatGuyWithTheGlasses TGWTG.com is going to team up against Chris. We already know that two members of the site are “fans†of his: Guru Larry and Happy Harry. If more of the reviewers find out about Chris and become trolls as well, it could escalate into a second Brawl in which the Critics and Gamers (or at least the British ones, apparently) band together to defeat Chris once and for all.

WMG: Chris and the trolls are working together. Chris enjoys the attention, so he and other trolls have constructed this elaborate hoax to get onlookers.

WMG: Chris is Bizarro/Liquid/Evil/some other kind of counterpart FanFic/ChristianHumberReloaded Christian Humber

• Both go by Christian. One was given that name, the other took the name himself.
• Both are GiftedlyBad. One made something insane but never intended to release it to anyone else, the other uploaded it to the internet himself.
• Both write themselves in as a GodModeSue. One is completely unrestrained and over-the-top, the other originally started as a somewhat independent character but was eventually upstaged by the AuthorAvatar.
• One has an almost NoHuggingNoKissing setting, the other... Template:Yiff let's not FanDisservice go there.
• One seems to have no internet presence whatsoever and may have even grown out of it, the other continues to cultivate a devoted Template:Hatedom and makes himself trollbait to this day.

The parallels are frightening.

WMG: Sonichu is TheKingInYellow

Think about it.

• Its creator is insane from exposure.
• It starts looking innocent, but becomes sinister and maddening, and the madness is only exacerbated by the way it looks innocent
• All who read it go mad, and become obsessed with bringing it down. One person committed suicide.
• Sonichu is yellow.

• • Well, damn, there goes my fanfic idea that Sonichu is really an EldritchAbomination!
    • Then why isn't everyone else who read it gone insane? Then again, maybe only people who act it out or deeply analyze it are driven to insanity. Which explains why Vivian's commentary has gone from normal to insane angrish.

WMG: PVCC can get away with all the property damage, destruction, mayhem and murder because they can afford it The worst crime in [=CWCville=] is smoking, which has a 1500$ fine. If that's the worst crime there is, then with ScrewTheRulesIHaveMoney enough money, they can do whatever they want. Hell, their random destruction sprees may be what pays for the services around town.

WMG:Chris is a RealLife BlackHoleSue Black Hole AntiSue

Think about it: In his childhood he was in the news http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/IT_TOOK_A_TALKING_BEAR_TO_GIVE_THE_NAME_A_YOUNG_BOY_LOVES at least http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/Sonic_the_Hedgehog_Watch_%26_Win_Sweepstakes twice, not to mention him being partially featured in http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vcKsEo52kC8 another broadcast as a teen, and in his adulthood he and his comic have gone from being obscure, insignificant pieces of filth amongst the putrid trash heap that is the Internet to, well, being “famous.†He also has http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/White_knight#Reasons_against_white_knighting more flaws http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/Chris_and_religion#Concept_of_sin than the http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/Chris_and_anger average http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/Chris_and_his_Ego human being (Template:Flanderization or at least highly exaggerated ones) and has a “Template:Hatedom fan base†composed solely of

Troll disclosure: This persona was created, appropriated, or otherwise used by trolls to manipulate Chris. Though this identity is contrived, the CWCki may treat it as if it were a real identity because it was to Chris. (It's also funnier that way.)

s and Template:Squick disgusted BileFascination but morbidly curious

Troper This user would edit the CWCki, but is too busy browsing TV Tropes.

bystanders, the majority of which enjoy watching his life ItGotWorse get flushed down the toilet and dumped into a lake of lava in Hell. So basically, the world really does revolve around Chris, just like he thinks; the spot light is on him, and all that's on stage are his faults.

WMG: Chris has connections with ChurchOfHappyology a certain group In one of his http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/CWC_Blog#28_December_2009 blog entries on CWCipedia, he told Clyde Cash and Jack Thaddeus to "Go Into F***ing Scientology." Of course, that could have just been an insult, but what if he really was asking them to join? Maybe not all of Chris's money comes from the “monthly tugboat.†Why anyone would bribe Chris, of all people, into finding them more followers is beyond me, though.

That, and their ad is showing on this page for some reason...

WMG: Chris is a Time Lord! And the Time Lords are in fucking despair that this is the case. They thought it couldn't get worse than that time he put his sonic screwdriver in his ass, but after that horrible incident with...urgh, no, it doesn't even bear thinking about. Suffice it to say that Chris' Sonichu medallion is the equivalent of Professor Yana's fob-watch and, if he ever works out how to open it, he will be restored with all his Time Lord powers and memories... and will probably kill himself there and then out of shame.

WMG: Alternatively, Chris is actually SuzumiyaHaruhi Well, someone has to be and it's definitely not the inflatable sex doll.

WMG: Chris is real...and a hoax!

Barbara & Bob are scientists who set out to methodically raise the worst person imaginable. They either are continuing the experiment, or BecomingTheMask went insane and became their characters.

WMG: Curse-ye-ha-me-ha does, in fact, work

Unfortunately for Chris, it doesn't work the way he wants it to: every time he uses it to curse someone, it brings bad luck and extreme misfortune HoistByHisOwnPetard to him (though it's not clear whether he's using the attack wrong or it is specifically targeted at him to begin with). This is the real reason why everything in his life is going wrong.

• So what does that make "forgiveness blessings"?
  • Clearly they don't make his life better, so either he's using them right, and blesses people he tried to curse earlier, or he's using them wrong, and blesses completely random people.
    • Now I understand where that fifty buck note on my pillow came from! Thank you, Chris!

WMG: Chris has moved to a donut shop in Oregon That's how he's able to make edits as 62.205.254.105! The Chandler family moved to Oregon and now own a donut shop, and Chris hasn't announced it yet, thinking the trolls won't be able to find him. hottip:*:But really guys, it's a troll. Chris would most likely use his name or a Sonichu-related handle (Reldnahc, Sonichu, etc.) if it really was him, or it'd at least be extremely obvious that it is. Also, I imagine him finding the Sonichu page would warrant a video or two (if he actually bothered to read through it, anyway; chances are, he probably wouldn't get to the end of the introduction).

• 62.205.254.105 isn't Chris, because he/she/it DOESN'T type Like This.

WMG: Chris is Nyarlatothep's avatar Clearly, old Nyarly plans to confuse people and create mass amounts of chaos on the internets by acting as this weird autistic failure of a man-child. why? For the ensuing Hilarity of course... Or something, I don't know how he thinks, but basically, he's BOTH a Troll and an Eldritch Abomination.

• Holy crap, without even seeing this WMG I thought something like that. But instead Nyarlatothep was moonlighting as Kim Jong-il, too, doing the same thing in real life that Chris is doing on the internet.

WMG: If every person, place or thing on the internet was a civilization, Chris would be Egypt.

Think about it: He gets blasted by trolls and still comes back for more, just like how Egypt gets conquered constantly but always comes back.

• • The trolls would be Vikings, then.

WMG: The man in Chris' video