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Welcome to the CWCki! The premier encyclopedia on the lolcow Chris Chan, the author of Sonichu and (alleged) literal motherfucker. We currently have 2,621 articles...and counting! "Any names, or persons, discussed in this wiki, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise parodic."

Article of the Week The Father Call is a phone call that occurred on 4 November 2009. In this call, Solid Chris spends 2 hours on the phone with Matthew Devoria (born 1957), the father of his would-be sweetheart Kacey, and a retired U.S. Marine who served in the Gulf War. Chris uses the opportunity of speaking to the dad of his sweetheart by boasting of his now-legendary honesty, before flimsily attempting to defend himself from an angry father. Their conversation is illuminating. What follows is probably the bluntest personal assessment Chris has ever received to date: Matt berates Chris for his laziness, egotism, lack of empathy, inability to grow up, unhealthy lifestyle, obesity, treatment of Kacey and general failure at life. To this day, Chris has never taken any of Matt and Kacey's advice to heart; throughout the call he retorts by saying that he leads a hard life, which includes such laborious tasks as doing menial chores, mowing the lawn and cleaning the house. He also claims to be strong and that he exercises regularly, as well as eating healthy by going to McDonald's only once per week and shoving vegetables down his throat. (More...) Incarceration Counter It has been... 1,030 days since Chris was last placed in custody. 251 days since the last known communication from Chris. We highly advise against contacting Chris in any way. HIPAA Counter Chris was in an unknown location for 65 days. He was likely there since his third hearing in February 2022, which would be a total stay of 90 days. He is now returned to the Jail of Fail. This Day in Christory Today in Christory, in 2010, Chris released a tedious video criticising trolls. (more...) Today was also the day, in 2000, that Sonichu and Rosechu's house in CWCville was completed. (more...) Did You Know... ... that Chris really likes Britney Spears (no matter what they all say)? ... and that his favorite song from "Air Britney" is "E-Mail My Heart"? ... that a male idiot tried to put out a fire while Chris just stood there and watched? ... that Liquid Chris's real name is CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!? ... and that Solid Chris's name is not Ian Brandon Anderson? ... that Jerkops are actually mall security "in colors other than blue and black"? ... that the Saw movies are some of Chris's favorite movies? ... that Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church is a church for all of God and Jesus's children, regardless of age, race, gender, socio-economic situation, or sexual orientation? ... that Bob Chandler helped host the WTJU Marathon back in 1990? ... that Chris's duck is bigger than previously photographed, and is no longer bent? ... that Chris sells driveway gravel for $15 a bag? ... and that people actually buy it?

Quote of the Now “ Mmmmm... I'm not acknowledging you right now. ” Chris in his most recent sighting. Da Update It is currently May 2024. It has been... 3 day(s) since Chris was last spotted in public. We highly advise against seeking out Chris in any way. Current Updates 26 May - Chris receives two official write-in votes for the presidential nomination of the Libertarian Party. 24 May - Chris is spotted at an airport in Dallas, Texas. 19 May - Chris's car is spotted parked at the Big Island house. 12 May - Chris tweets to complain about people having taken photos of him without consent. 4 May - Chris uploads AI Chris Chan Vs Christ Chan - Suvwl' van bom, a song he was singing in both March 24 accidental streams. 26 April - Chris uploads Christ Chan - Sakkijarven Polkka mp4. 22 April - Chris uploads Harvesting Process, Gravel at the Sonichu Temple. Recently Uncovered Info 20 May - Priorities from December 2019 19 May - Conjuring Movies from January 2021 18 May - Christmas and Merge Talk from December 2020 27 April - Picture of Chris editing Transformers - Past Ideas Reemerging Part 3 from January 2024 19 April - Art request for Sockness lore from December 2019 11 April - Cults3D from January 2024 CWCki News Account Creation NOTE: You must be 18 years or older to get an account. Account creation for the CWCki is open. To request an account, contact a CWCki Jerkop. They can be reached at - the Official CWCki Server Discord - message: Hurtful Truth Level, or Larry the Larryhog Official CWCki Server Discord • CWCki Club forum • r/ChrisChanSonichu Check out the Official CWCki Server Discord, and the section about Chris at the CWCki Club forums, and the Chris Chan subreddit, full of lively and often times thoughtful discussions on Chris and Sonichu. (Use the wiki talk pages or the CWCki-related channels in the Discord for article-related discussions).

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