Vivitheg's AIM chat

One day in late 2008, our fellow Vivitheg was fed up with Chris's bullshit and thought it was time to talk some damn sense into him. After rummaging around the Internet for a while, she finally found Chris's AOL account, so she proceeded to have a chat with Chris trying to address his many personal and psychological issues, from the Megan Schroeder saga, to his Attraction Sign and his arrest by jerkops, to the first trollings from 2008.

After three long, excruciating hours, during which Chris presumably slipped on cat dung and knocked the Internet gateway, Vivitheg declared defeat. Chris proved to be so stubborn, self-centered and unable to take responsability for his actions, that any attempt to reason with him failed. Any time Vivi made him think about his actions, the answer she received from Chris was always one of his stock phrases. Never did she managed to get him to think about his actions, thus cementing the theory that Chris is self-centered and always thinks he's right.

Fortunately for Vivian and the PVCC forums, the resulting chat log was of the first insights on Chris's mind, and the psychological information obtained from its analysis proved to be decisive for the coordinated trollings in 2009.

The following section has a series of highlights from the chat. The major ones are italicized.

PROTIP: On Windows Vista, type Control-G in Notepad to fire up a Go To Line dialog. On Windows XP and older, try getting a real text editor like [Notepad2] or [Notepad++]

Highlights of the chat

• Line 25: Even though Megan made it more than clear there's nothing more going on between her and Chris, he's still waiting for her.
• Line 35: He thinks all his documents posted on Encyclopedia Dramatica were twisted and mangled, when they're in fact present intact and raw.
• Line 56: Even after being trolled, he still believed the girls were lining up at his feet over the phone and the Internets.
• Line 127: Aside from total devotion to him, Chris doesn't has much of a clear idea of what he wants in a woman. His desires are mostly generic: "a nice, honest personality, ability to care about me genuinely, able to love me for me".
• Lines 100, 134, 192, 236, 239, 269, 294, 395, 401, 436, 446, 592, 672: Chris seems to be incapable of introspecting and solving problems. Quite often, when asked to think about something personal from him or when asked to do something, he just BAWWWWWs and blurts out one of his stock phrases: "I feel stupid", "I am only Human, and a Virgin", "How am I supposed to know better [...] if I have not had EVEN MY FIRST DATE?", "but I AM STILL SOCIALLY SHY!", "with my friggin' autism mental block, it's easier said than done", "I lack self-confidence", "I'M JUST TOO DAMN SHY AND NOT SELF-FRIGGIN-CONFIDENT!", "I'm in pain, stress, heart-confused", "I am DUMB on the Relationship, Dating and all those subjects",

Artist's depiction of line 161.

• Line 161: Chris goes out to clean some cat dung at his kitchen, but he slipped and "made a mess".
• Line 170: Chris admits he failed to achieve any kind of progress during his Love Quest ever since 2003.
• Line 192: Chris still thinks he can't grasp the basics of dating without a first date, regardless of how much people in the world already know the basics while on their way to their first date.
• Line 212: He still thinks Encyclopedia Dramatica has the fault for the drama between Chris, Meg, and the Rule 34 drawings.
• Line 258: Every now and then, he blurts out some non-sequitur about his life or his sexual desires. Instead of controlling them, he justifies them by saying it's his half of the discussion, and he can say anything that pops up in his "Random Access Memory" (not the same as a computer RAM).
• Line 309: Singles bars are strictly verboten for Chris, as he irrationally views these places as too dark and "smokey, drinkey"; basically, the whole purpose of a singles bar.
• Line 317: He still hangs out at the library looking for girls. Only difference is, instead of doing it at PVCC, he does it at the University of Virginia...
• Line 332: ... and he still thinks the library is a place where people go to hang out and find a Sweetheart...
• Lines 352-367: ... probably because he thinks people who just happened to find their friends at the library and give each other a hug are people who just found their Sweetheart.
• Line 402: He still thinks his "Educational Porn" is a good idea to learn about sex.
• Line 403: He still thinks "Dating Education" should be a curricular subject on all schools...
• Line 407: ... and he fervently defends this.
• Line 411: He thinks reaching your third date with a girl automatically entitles you to the right of having sex with her.
• Line 446: Chris is obviously unaware of the impression he's causing by calling himself an unconfident, high-functional autistic virgin.
• Line 496: Chris sucks so much at talking to girls, he freezes up even when rehearsing at home with his Lego figures.
• Lines 501-510: He thinks we care about his Electric-Hedgehogs Sonichu and Rosechu.
• Line 536: He usually doesn't think Sonic the Hedgehog is a kiddie video game when it obviously is.
• Line 545: And if he does thinks it's childish, he thinks drawing his electric-hedgehogs having sex automatically makes him very mature.
• Line 556: He sees nothing wrong with doing it, to bout.
• Line 572: Chris does not believe in maturity.
• Line 603: He still insists on whitewashing his misbehavior at the mall and blaming Scotpalazzo and his Jerkops for it.
• Line 620: After being v& by the mall security, he was also partially b& from the mall: he can only go with his parents...
• Lines 625-658: ... and yet, he still thinks his b& was unjustified and thinks being emotionally hurt gives him permission to loudly BAWWWWW in the middle of the mall.
• Line 718: He thinks therapists are useless, that everything can be fixed "with a close gal-pal".
• Line 731: He would rather eat a cube of shit than selling his stuff...
• Line 759: ... excuses him claiming he needs no money because he can find counsel with his church...
• Line 763: ... and thinks like a Xenufag who claims his church is better than any psychiatrist.
• Lines 770-800: He can't have a view on Christianity other than a fundamentalist one, because he can only read literally what the Bible says.
• Line 817: Lastly, religious tolerance is beyond Chris's understanding, as he can only believe that God and Jesus are true, instead of knowing and acknowledging the existence and beliefs of people professing other religions. Case in point: Vivitheg is Taoist, but the sole fact that she doesn't belives in God and Jesus makes him uncomfortable.

The chat

  CWCSonichu: Hey, Vivian. How are you?
  CWCSonichu returned at 11:23:03 AM. 
  VIVItheG: I want to make sure however, this is the actual Chris.
  CWCSonichu: I've been working on the deviantART page.
  VIVItheG: There have been so many fakes recently.
  VIVItheG: That I've tried to get into contact with
  VIVItheG: only to be trolled
  CWCSonichu: if you have a question to ask me that can confirm me to you; fire away.
  VIVItheG: well I don't know anything the real chris would know
  CWCSonichu: Also, I know that I did send you a few e-mails about the deviantART page, and asking you 
     if I can add yours, as long as I quote you, from my ChrisChanSonichu@aol.com account.
  VIVItheG: oh okay
  VIVItheG: that works.
  CWCSonichu: good.
  CWCSonichu: did you read the e-mails?
  VIVItheG: yes
  CWCSonichu: good.
  VIVItheG: do you believe panda is a troll now?
  CWCSonichu: I'm on the CWCSonichu AIM only, to wait for Megan to reveal her real self to me.
  CWCSonichu: not yet.
  VIVItheG: what, real self?
  CWCSonichu: you see, an impostor likely has hacked into her old yahoo e-mail account, and has been 
     sending me e-mails; I can tell in the messages of those e-mails that they were coming from the 
     impostor.
  CWCSonichu: I know that Megan may still have her AIM account name, so I'm waiting to talk to her 
     through there, so I can update her on the recent events for real, if possible.
  VIVItheG: Chris...I...I don't know what to say
  CWCSonichu: it's alright.
  VIVItheG: Didn't megan make herself clear that she wanted to stop talking to you?
  VIVItheG: I'm only going by what those e-mails said
  VIVItheG: but i have no idea what happened in real life
  VIVItheG: so other things could have happened
  CWCSonichu: I've actually talked to her through the AIM a few weeks ago; it's all okay between her 
     and me as just friends now. :-)
  CWCSonichu: damn those bullies to twist things in the e-mails out of proportion.
  VIVItheG: Well, they weren't really twisted
  VIVItheG: They were just the raw e-mails posted
  VIVItheG: Left to our interpretation
  VIVItheG: they did no twisting, chris
  CWCSonichu: that's not important to me right now.
  CWCSonichu: back to Panda; do you have any concrete evidence to prove her to be a troll?
  VIVItheG: no
  CWCSonichu: okay, then.
  VIVItheG: but i do have evidence that she is going to break up the relationship with you
  CWCSonichu: what is your source?
  VIVItheG: http://pandahalo.deviantart.com/
  VIVItheG: That is the revelations of last night
  CWCSonichu: let me look.
  CWCSonichu: my response: Holy Crap.
  CWCSonichu: :-(
  VIVItheG: I have no proof that she is a troll, I'll admit that
  VIVItheG: But it seems too damn likely that girls are just lining up at your feet
  CWCSonichu: could you elaborate further in that statement?
  VIVItheG: How many girls have wanted to start a relationship with you
  VIVItheG: let's say as of one month ago
  CWCSonichu: In Person, NO WOMEN HAVE "Lined Up at my Feet". On the internet and in recent phone 
     calls, I guess so.
  CWCSonichu: so, I can't fully agree with your statement.
  VIVItheG: exactly chris
  VIVItheG: no woman IN PERSON
  VIVItheG: it's so easy to manipulate people over the internet
  CWCSonichu: ...
  VIVItheG: you can't start an honest relationship on the internet
  VIVItheG: it's nearly impossible chris
  VIVItheG: there are so many trolls out there right now
  CWCSonichu: damn it.
  CWCSonichu: this really grinds my gears.
  VIVItheG: what
  VIVItheG: what does
  CWCSonichu: this whole thing right now.
  CWCSonichu: what I'm hearing from you, what I've just read on Panda's entry; it grinds my gears.
  VIVItheG: the truth is hard to face chris
  CWCSonichu: *sigh*
  CWCSonichu: And so, the world continues to play the world's favorite game of "Kick the Autistic". 
     I'm gonna need all the luck I can get. *Game Over*
  VIVItheG: Chris
  VIVItheG: You have to realize something
  VIVItheG: Sometimes we even forget you are autistic
  VIVItheG: It is your person
  VIVItheG: that is turning people away from you
  VIVItheG: not your autism
  CWCSonichu: my person?
  VIVItheG: yes
  VIVItheG: look
  VIVItheG: I read the things you said with kawaiikitsune
  CWCSonichu: and?
  VIVItheG: She was a geniunely nice person
  VIVItheG: she wasn't trying to troll you
  CWCSonichu: yes she was.
  VIVItheG: she was trying to help you
  CWCSonichu: no she wasn't
  VIVItheG: what do you mean no she wasn't
  VIVItheG: explain that
  CWCSonichu: a troll
  VIVItheG: oh okay
  VIVItheG: right
  VIVItheG: She was trying to help you
  VIVItheG: the only reason she wanted to forge any relationship with you was to help you
  CWCSonichu: Well, I feel stupid.
  VIVItheG: chris
  VIVItheG: you can't just write that off as "i feel stupid"
  VIVItheG: you really have to look at what you said to her
  CWCSonichu: well, I do right now feel stupid. stupid and blind of obvious things.
  VIVItheG: What do YOU think turned her away from you?
  VIVItheG: I want to know what YOU think
  VIVItheG: this is the only way I can help you
  VIVItheG: If I tell you what I think, that won't help you
  VIVItheG: because we can have completely different answers
  CWCSonichu: let me read the words.
  VIVItheG: http://kawaiikitsune123.deviantart.com/
  CWCSonichu: that's what I'm looking at.
  VIVItheG: alright.
  CWCSonichu: after reading the messages from me, I'm not sure what to think.
  CWCSonichu: or feel
  VIVItheG: what?
  VIVItheG: you sent them! you should know!
  CWCSonichu: I just don't know; those were much earlier messages, and I've been under a lot of 
     stress, moments of happiness, and whatnot. the new bunches of informations pushed a lot of 
     thoughts from then out of my head.
  CWCSonichu: *sigh*
  VIVItheG: You have to watch what you say
  VIVItheG: I mean no guy talks like that to a woman
  VIVItheG: Ever
  VIVItheG: I mean, you shouldn't even be on the topic of physical contact
  VIVItheG: What do you want in a woman?
  VIVItheG: Besides looks.
  CWCSonichu: a nice, honest personality, ability to care about me genuinely, able to love me for me. 
     I can't say other internal details off the top of my head.
  VIVItheG: That's acceptable I guess
  VIVItheG: I mean who wants a person that's not nice
  VIVItheG: I mean those are fairly generic
  VIVItheG: Everyone should look for someone who cares about them
  VIVItheG: I mean that's given in a relationship
  CWCSonichu: I am only Human, and a Virgin; I'M GOING TO MAKE A LOT OF TRIALS AND ERRORS that may 
     sound unsound.
  VIVItheG: How many years has it been chris
  CWCSonichu: since when?
  VIVItheG: Since you started your so called "love quest"
  VIVItheG: it shouldn't even be called a love quest
  CWCSonichu: my Sweetheart Search started the Summer of 2003; after I turned 21
  VIVItheG: okay about 5 years
  VIVItheG: How much progress do YOU think you've made and tell me why
  CWCSonichu: greater than 5 years.
  CWCSonichu: let me think...
  CWCSonichu: it started with the realization of the infinitely-high boyfriend factor,
  CWCSonichu: then I thought of using signs for attraction,
  CWCSonichu: then trying to put the word as inexpensively as possible in newsletters, or whatever
  CWCSonichu: ,
  CWCSonichu: Met Megan,
  CWCSonichu: Lost Megan,
  CWCSonichu: Mary Lee Walsh and the Jerkops thwarted my Sweetheart Search numerous times, making it 
     obvious that Virgina is for Virgins; NOT LOVERS,
  CWCSonichu: Sonichu fanbase rose greatly; chatted with female fans,
  CWCSonichu: built up a bit of confidence between Blanca, Sarah J and Panda, with wandering, learning 
     heart,
  CWCSonichu: CHAOS from the Trolls,
  CWCSonichu: desperate for True, Honest Relationship,
  VIVItheG: is that it?
  VIVItheG: that doesn't answer
  VIVItheG: how much progress do YOU THINK YOU'VE MADE
  CWCSonichu: I WAS NOT FINISHED; I HAD TO CLEAN UP SOME CAT CRAP, AND SLIPPED AND MADE A MESS IN MY 
     KITCHEN!
  CWCSonichu: GOD!
  VIVItheG: alright sorry
  CWCSonichu signed off at 12:10:13 PM. 
  CWCSonichu signed on at 12:13:33 PM. 
  cwcsonichu: continuing,
  cwcsonichu: felt somewhat desperate, and socially flushed, to have my first intercourse,
  cwcsonichu: LEARNED A LOT,
  cwcsonichu: I guess NO FREAKIN' PROGRESS! DAMN IT!
  VIVItheG: exactly chris
  VIVItheG: no progress
  VIVItheG: What do YOU think you've been doing wrong.
  cwcsonichu signed off at 12:17:18 PM. 
  cwcsonichu signed on at 12:20:16 PM. 
  cwcsonichu: are you there?
  VIVItheG: what's happening?
  VIVItheG: your internet unstable what?
  cwcsonichu: banged my head on the dresser; had my cable modem and wi-fi router on the top of it; 
     toppled over, causing connection chaos.
  VIVItheG: anyway
  cwcsonichu: *sigh*
  VIVItheG: last thing i said was
  VIVItheG: what
  VIVItheG: righto
  cwcsonichu: did you get what I typed?
  VIVItheG: What do you think you're doing wrong
  VIVItheG: yes i did
  VIVItheG: and i've heard it before
  VIVItheG: so it's nothing really new
  VIVItheG: So I just want to know what you think you're doing wrong
  cwcsonichu: I don't know; I'M A VIRGIN!
  cwcsonichu: HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW BETTER, RELATIONSHIP-WISE?
  cwcsonichu: if I have not had EVEN MY FIRST DATE.
  VIVItheG: Chris
  VIVItheG: A lot of people have first dates
  VIVItheG: do you think they know everything then?
  cwcsonichu: maybe not, but the majority of them had their First Dates in their EARLY TEENAGE YEARS.
  cwcsonichu: *sigh*
  VIVItheG: and still
  VIVItheG: some people don't
  cwcsonichu: still in pain from cleaning up that crap.
  VIVItheG: so there are still people who are nervous about their first date
  cwcsonichu: and slipping on the floor, banging my head.
  VIVItheG: sorry about that
  VIVItheG: that is a lot of accidents in a short amount of time...
  cwcsonichu: that's not your fault.
  VIVItheG: anyway.
  VIVItheG: What do you think went wrong with Megan
  cwcsonichu: call me possibly clumsy.
  VIVItheG: and I'll tell you what I think went wrong
  cwcsonichu: In PROTEST against that ED page, right after I found it last November, I drew my FIRST 
     Sexual Drawings, including that one between me and Megan; friggin' bastards twisted it to their 
     evil, instead of leaving it alone for my PROTEST.
  cwcsonichu: she saw it, and that was that; "I need my space."
  cwcsonichu: I wish I had never found that friggin' page.
  cwcsonichu: IN the first place.
  VIVItheG: Chris, sadly that's not the answer i wanted to hear
  VIVItheG: but first i'll address this
  VIVItheG: You drew that picture
  VIVItheG: It was your fault
  VIVItheG: Not ED.
  VIVItheG: You have to accept that.
  cwcsonichu: I DID, LONG AGO.
  cwcsonichu: I had to be a Protestor.
  VIVItheG: well you seem to imply you blame ED in that answer above
  cwcsonichu: HAD TO
  VIVItheG: chris
  VIVItheG: everytime
  VIVItheG: you do something
  VIVItheG: the page gets bigger
  VIVItheG: do you know why
  cwcsonichu: they basically monitor EVERY MOVE I MAKE.
  VIVItheG: on the internet
  VIVItheG: so do you know what you must do
  cwcsonichu: get more social, but I AM STILL SOCIALLY SHY!
  VIVItheG: get over it
  VIVItheG: just get over it.
  cwcsonichu: with my friggin' autism mental block, it's easier said than done.
  VIVItheG: chris
  VIVItheG: You are better off than most people with autism
  VIVItheG: You're very lucky
  VIVItheG: I know people with autism, they can hardly talk.
  cwcsonichu: you don't think I already knew that?
  VIVItheG: Think about what they go through
  cwcsonichu: I've seen Rain Man
  VIVItheG: exactly.
  VIVItheG: So get over it.
  VIVItheG: Now
  VIVItheG: about megan
  VIVItheG: the response I wanted to hear
  VIVItheG: was that she explicitly said
  VIVItheG: that she wanted to JUST BE FRIENDS
  VIVItheG: and that should have been the end of it
  VIVItheG: once a woman tells a man no, they have to respect that
  VIVItheG: if the man keeps pressing on, then the woman will be irritated and then probably lose that 
     friendship
  cwcsonichu: I have my dreams that God gave to me, and I have to see my Crystal Weston Chandler be 
     Born. But I need my Sweetheart first.
  VIVItheG: what does that have to do
  VIVItheG: with anything i just said
  cwcsonichu: I DON'T KNOW; it's my half of the discussion; I can say anything that randomly pops up 
     in my Random Access Memory.
  VIVItheG: what
  cwcsonichu: it's too random in my opinion.
  VIVItheG: can you stop from doing that
  VIVItheG: well you acknowledge that it is
  VIVItheG: so maybe you can stop yourself
  cwcsonichu: I lack self-confidence.
  VIVItheG: what
  VIVItheG: what does that have to do with stopping yourself from saying something you already know is 
     "too random"
  VIVItheG: and then this doesn't even have to do with megan
  VIVItheG: and the fact that she just wanted to be friends
  VIVItheG: god we are off on so many subjects now i can hardly keep track
  cwcsonichu: Forget about Megan.
  VIVItheG: That is some good advice i hope YOU will take
  cwcsonichu: I can hardly keep track myself.
  VIVItheG: to forget about megan.
  cwcsonichu: I meant for you to stop talking about her.
  VIVItheG: chris
  VIVItheG: I want you
  VIVItheG: to acknowledge
  VIVItheG: that all you will be with her
  VIVItheG: is just friends
  VIVItheG: You need to find another person
  VIVItheG: Go out into the world
  VIVItheG: and look
  cwcsonichu: I have acknowledged that a long time ago.
  VIVItheG: Good.
  VIVItheG: That is good.
  cwcsonichu: I have been looking
  VIVItheG: where
  cwcsonichu: I"M JUST TOO DAMN SHY AND NOT SELF_FRIGGIN"_CONFIDENT
  VIVItheG: BE MORE CONFIDENT
  cwcsonichu: IN Charlottesville.
  VIVItheG: well where exactly
  VIVItheG: what places
  cwcsonichu: that's easier said than done; i've said that before.
  VIVItheG: single's bar
  cwcsonichu: UVA
  cwcsonichu: NO
  cwcsonichu: !
  VIVItheG: why not there
  VIVItheG: that seems
  VIVItheG: like a very good place
  VIVItheG: in my opinion to start looking
  VIVItheG: you know
  cwcsonichu: smokey, drunk; turn-offs!!
  cwcsonichu: too dark too.
  VIVItheG: go during the day.
  VIVItheG: there are bound to be other people like you
  VIVItheG: who are looking
  VIVItheG: you can't just write off a place
  VIVItheG: because it "stereotypically"
  VIVItheG: has those kinds of people
  cwcsonichu: I GO TO THE UVA"S ALDERMANLIBRARY: VERY POPULATED OFTEN
  VIVItheG: you don't know that
  VIVItheG: what's uva
  cwcsonichu: University Of Virginia.
  VIVItheG: i'm just saying
  VIVItheG: typically
  VIVItheG: at a university
  VIVItheG: that age range
  VIVItheG: 18-23 ish
  VIVItheG: i'm guessing
  VIVItheG: maybe too young?
  cwcsonichu: RIGHT IN MY ALLEY.
  cwcsonichu: NO
  cwcsonichu: I'm looking for 18-26
  VIVItheG: and how do you look for women...in a library
  cwcsonichu: there is a lounge.
  cwcsonichu: in the library
  cwcsonichu: and a coffee shop
  cwcsonichu: you tell me
  VIVItheG: well
  VIVItheG: at my college
  VIVItheG: in the library
  cwcsonichu: it is a very popular place.
  VIVItheG: people like to study
  VIVItheG: that's what I do
  VIVItheG: i don't go to a library
  VIVItheG: thinking about getting a boyfriend
  VIVItheG: okay
  cwcsonichu: a lot of people go to the library looking for their sweetheart.
  cwcsonichu: it's just a matter of being there at the right time.
  cwcsonichu: and not being fucking autistic and shy!
  cwcsonichu: I'm sorry.
  cwcsonichu: I'm on edge right now.
  VIVItheG: why are you apologizing?
  VIVItheG: i'm trying to think of someway to explain this to you
  VIVItheG: how many people have you seen
  cwcsonichu: well, I just cursed for one thing, in a loud way.
  cwcsonichu: a lot.
  VIVItheG: "hook up" in the library
  VIVItheG: on a completely stranger basis
  cwcsonichu: a lot
  cwcsonichu: a lot
  VIVItheG: they haven't had previous classes together before
  VIVItheG: how many is a lot
  VIVItheG: How many haver YOU SEEN
  cwcsonichu: in the years I've witnessed there, over 100 times
  VIVItheG: and you can confirm
  cwcsonichu: yes
  VIVItheG: that those were all on complete basis
  VIVItheG: of them not knowing each other previously
  cwcsonichu: yes
  cwcsonichu: I have a headache
  VIVItheG: and then the relationship works out 
  VIVItheG: for them
  cwcsonichu: yes
  cwcsonichu: brb
  VIVItheG: I don't believe that at all, I can't believe that.
  VIVItheG: This is a library on a university
  VIVItheG: it's not a place for people to just hook up
  VIVItheG: i don't understand why you would go there
  VIVItheG: you must feel out of place?
  VIVItheG: don't you?
  cwcsonichu: why can't you just say "okay" after I type in brb, so I can get an asprin, take a deep 
     breath or something, which is the acronym for "be right back"?
  cwcsonichu: *sigh*
  cwcsonichu: *belch*
  cwcsonichu: *from stress*
  cwcsonichu: *and pain*
  VIVItheG: because you will be back
  VIVItheG: and you will read those
  VIVItheG: that is why
  VIVItheG: well i dont' know what you were gonna do okay
  cwcsonichu: I was inklingly being sarcastic.
  VIVItheG: that was terrible.
  cwcsonichu: I feel terrible; phyically and mentally.
  VIVItheG: why
  VIVItheG: maybe i'm doing this wrong
  VIVItheG: why do you feel terrible
  cwcsonichu: I'm in pain, stress, heart-confused; how can I be more clear than that?
  cwcsonichu: plus my headache.
  VIVItheG: i think you are putting too much attachment
  cwcsonichu: to what?
  VIVItheG: to relationships
  VIVItheG: that definitely won't work out
  cwcsonichu: well, like I said, I don't know better, I am DUMB on the Relationship, Dating and all 
     those subjects, except for the amount of educational porn I have watched, then I feel smarter 
     about how I'd like my first time to go. But I desperately need a Dating Education Class, and High 
     Schools don't even think of that in addition to their Sexual Education.
  VIVItheG: dating education class
  VIVItheG: does not exist
  cwcsonichu: IT SHOULD.
  VIVItheG: because it is different for every person
  VIVItheG: you can't tailor it to a general group
  VIVItheG: it's individual experiences
  cwcsonichu: Sex Ed is good for date 3 or beyond, but what is it that has to be done before then?
  cwcsonichu: that's why Dating Education IS REQUIRED DESPERIATELY.
  VIVItheG: ...
  VIVItheG: first off
  VIVItheG: date 3 does not mean sex
  VIVItheG: okay
  VIVItheG: also
  VIVItheG: in a relationship
  VIVItheG: sex should be one of the last things
  VIVItheG: first
  VIVItheG: you got to know each other
  VIVItheG: how are you lives going to be with each other
  cwcsonichu: I already knew that.
  VIVItheG: you don't seem to know that
  VIVItheG: it's not like in 2 dates
  VIVItheG: you will know everything about that person
  cwcsonichu: you are not telepathic
  VIVItheG: let's have sex.
  VIVItheG: i know i'm not
  VIVItheG: i'm just basing it off things you say
  VIVItheG: that's all i've got to work with
  VIVItheG: okay
  cwcsonichu: shit my quotes.
  VIVItheG: ...yes. what you say
  VIVItheG: reflects who you are
  cwcsonichu: well, I am a DUMB Frustrated Virgin, and I've never had a First Date, I'm 26, I lack 
     self-confidence, the Boyfriend-Factor is infinitely-high, I fear rejection, I'm STRAIGHT, I'm 
     High-Functionally Autistic; I should know A LOT BETTER, BUT I DON'T KNOW A THING on the Emotional 
     Basics that is REQUIRED BEFOREHAND!
  VIVItheG: don't call yourself dumb
  VIVItheG: if you can't even believe in yourself
  VIVItheG: then why bother with life
  VIVItheG: secondly
  VIVItheG: don't call yourself a virgin
  VIVItheG: people don't need to know that
  cwcsonichu: On the subjects, I don't know better, so I am DUMB ON THOSE SUBJECTS.
  VIVItheG: well don't say that
  VIVItheG: god
  VIVItheG: what will people think
  VIVItheG: if you call yourself dumb
  VIVItheG: think about it
  VIVItheG: what will they think about you
  VIVItheG: that you are dumb
  cwcsonichu: I'm not telepathic myself.
  VIVItheG: and not worth their time
  VIVItheG: if I said I was dumb
  VIVItheG: what would you think
  VIVItheG: that i was dumb
  VIVItheG: exactly come on
  cwcsonichu: my head is blank.
  cwcsonichu: right now.
  cwcsonichu: so I can't come up with a sound answer.
  VIVItheG: I am an idiot.
  cwcsonichu: no, you're not.
  VIVItheG: okay i'll do this a different way
  VIVItheG: I like ponies.
  VIVItheG: What does that say about me.
  cwcsonichu: that's fine, so do I.
  VIVItheG: okay uhm
  VIVItheG: This isn't going to work
  VIVItheG: if we have prior knowledge of each other
  VIVItheG: Whatever you say to a person
  VIVItheG: that you've just met
  VIVItheG: that is what they're going to think
  VIVItheG: they have no prior knowledge of anything else
  cwcsonichu: mostly, I do not claim to know what other people are going to think about me and what I 
     say, so I just let them be.
  VIVItheG: no
  VIVItheG: if you talk to them
  VIVItheG: and introduce yourself
  VIVItheG: with stuff
  VIVItheG: that's what they're going to think
  VIVItheG: so calling yourself dumb
  VIVItheG: is not going to help
  cwcsonichu: everybody knows that.
  cwcsonichu: I know that.
  VIVItheG: then WHY do YOU call yourself dumb
  VIVItheG: if you already know that
  cwcsonichu: because my mind is blank, and I feel dumb right now.
  VIVItheG: okay
  VIVItheG: if you were introducing yourself to a girl right now
  VIVItheG: what would you say
  VIVItheG: first time
  VIVItheG: they know nothing about you
  VIVItheG: just first time
  cwcsonichu: I'd probably freeze up, because that often happens to me, even in rehearsals at home, 
     between my LEGO figurine and a woman LEGO figurine; I'd constantly freeze up.
  VIVItheG: Okay
  VIVItheG: pretend you wouldn't freeze up
  VIVItheG: what would you say
  cwcsonichu: "Hello"
  cwcsonichu: then my mind would freeze up.
  VIVItheG: "so what are you doing here"
  cwcsonichu: where's here?
  VIVItheG: pretend it's the library okay
  cwcsonichu: ida know..."hanging around"
  VIVItheG: "what do you do?"
  cwcsonichu: "I draw comics"
  VIVItheG: "interesting, what are they about"
  cwcsonichu: "stories of my electric-hedgehogs, Sonichu and Rosechu; some stories about me."
  VIVItheG: i can already tell
  VIVItheG: that this is going nowhere
  VIVItheG: you know anna right
  VIVItheG: and that blog
  VIVItheG: i don't remember the details
  VIVItheG: but you talked to her about your sonichu and whatnot
  cwcsonichu: I Personally Know Anna McLerran
  VIVItheG: yes i know
  VIVItheG: to be perfectly honest
  VIVItheG: to a woman
  VIVItheG: looking for a man
  VIVItheG: to be with for the rest of her life
  VIVItheG: someone who draws comics about childish things
  VIVItheG: do you see where i'm coming from
  cwcsonichu: no, I don't
  VIVItheG: When a woman looks for maturity
  VIVItheG: in a man
  VIVItheG: let's put it that way
  VIVItheG: maturity
  cwcsonichu: ok
  VIVItheG: comics about electric hedgehogs whatever
  VIVItheG: based off children's video games
  VIVItheG: you may not think they are for children
  VIVItheG: but for a majority of the people in this world
  VIVItheG: they are
  cwcsonichu: they're not just for children.
  cwcsonichu: I disagree.
  VIVItheG: You may disagree
  VIVItheG: but for a majority of the people
  VIVItheG: who live
  VIVItheG: in the united states
  VIVItheG: they are seen as children's video games
  VIVItheG: and it's okay if you still play them
  VIVItheG: but to draw comics involving made up electric hedgehog pokemon
  cwcsonichu: what if I said that I draw sex pictures? would that make a difference?
  VIVItheG: are you being...sarcastic
  cwcsonichu: no, I'm being serious.
  VIVItheG: Think about it
  VIVItheG: for a second
  cwcsonichu: instead of cartoons, I draw sex pictures; would that make a difference of opinion?
  VIVItheG: Yes
  VIVItheG: It would be disturbing
  cwcsonichu: obviously.
  VIVItheG: If you know that
  VIVItheG: why would you say that
  cwcsonichu: to the naked, unopen mind.
  VIVItheG: exactly
  VIVItheG: so why would you even bring up the point in the first place
  cwcsonichu: to make a point; you say maturity; honest intercourse is mature.
  VIVItheG: that is not mature
  VIVItheG: well okay
  VIVItheG: that is
  VIVItheG: but it's now being taken in a completely different way
  VIVItheG: now it's disturbing
  VIVItheG: which is equally as bad
  VIVItheG: as being immature
  VIVItheG: i have to go give my sister a ride, i'll be back in 15 minutes
  VIVItheG: i want you to think about what you've just said
  VIVItheG: and tell me why you said those things
  cwcsonichu signed off at 1:16:40 PM. 
  cwcsonichu signed on at 1:16:43 PM. 
  cwcsonichu: okay, what would you recommend that I say that would make me sound "mature"? Maturity is 
     a joke; NOBODY REALLY GROWS UP.
  cwcsonichu signed off at 1:18:14 PM. 
  cwcsonichu: are you thinking?
  cwcsonichu signed on at 1:18:56 PM. 
  cwcsonichu: please respond
  cwcsonichu: hello?
  cwcsonichu signed off at 1:23:28 PM. 
  cwcsonichu signed on at 1:26:09 PM. 
  cwcsonichu: Hey, Vivian.
  cwcsonichu: I'll stay here for a while longer.
  VIVItheG: alright
  cwcsonichu: oh, good, you're back.
  VIVItheG: yeah i said i had to drop my sister off somewhere
  cwcsonichu: oh, okay.
  cwcsonichu: did you think about what I said last.
  VIVItheG: let's put it this way
  VIVItheG: what do you look for in a woman
  VIVItheG: would you want her to like childish things
  cwcsonichu: that's an optional feature.
  VIVItheG: okay i got it
  VIVItheG: why would a 26 year old who doesn't attend that university be in a library
  cwcsonichu: but in a nutshell, I'm looking for an 18-26-year old, Boyfriend-free, caring , 
     smoke-free, non-alcholic white woman to make into a sweetheart from the ground-up
  VIVItheG: it seems out of place
  VIVItheG: for most women
  VIVItheG: i would say
  cwcsonichu: a lot I guess.
  VIVItheG: so why would you be in a library
  VIVItheG: why
  VIVItheG: tell me why
  cwcsonichu: I would be at Fashion Square instead, but the Manajerk, Scottpalazzo, there basically 
     permanently banned me from there.
  cwcsonichu: and Wal-Mart and Target were no-good.
  VIVItheG: well i'm not talking about those places
  VIVItheG: well actually wait
  VIVItheG: why were you banned
  VIVItheG: what did you do
  VIVItheG: that's probably a better question
  cwcsonichu: and UVA's Alderman Library is a lot better than a singles bar.
  VIVItheG: how do you konw
  VIVItheG: know
  cwcsonichu: they just didn't like me hanging around there; they're all a bunch of jerks.
  cwcsonichu: basic instinct.
  cwcsonichu: so, I wasn't spending money there; what should they care?
  VIVItheG: you're withholding information
  VIVItheG: you must have done something
  VIVItheG: to draw attention to yourself
  cwcsonichu: specifically, I was NOT TOTALLY BANNED, but I can only be there with one of my parents.
  cwcsonichu: the situation with Hanna.
  cwcsonichu: as read in the comic; it was the anguished cry.
  cwcsonichu: so I was litteraly loud; big whoop; those jerks still hated my guts.
  VIVItheG: well, that does draw attention
  cwcsonichu: like a lot of men in this state.
  VIVItheG: and distract people who are trying to concetrate
  VIVItheG: on their job/buying stuff
  VIVItheG: you don't do that kind of thing in public
  VIVItheG: which is why you got kicked out
  VIVItheG: YOU may think it was just a loud cry
  cwcsonichu: well, it was called for; my heart was toyed with.
  VIVItheG: but OTHERS may think it was a distraction
  VIVItheG: what would OTHER PEOPLE around the area think
  cwcsonichu: probably that somebody got Seriously Hurt, which was WHAT DID HAPPEN.
  VIVItheG: maybe seriously hurt physically
  cwcsonichu: I was the victim.
  cwcsonichu: the physicallity; my heart.
  VIVItheG: no
  VIVItheG: that is not physically
  VIVItheG: losing an arm is physically
  cwcsonichu: getting an emotional stab to the heart is physical.
  VIVItheG: to others
  VIVItheG: it just looks like someone yelling nooo
  VIVItheG: for no apparent reason
  cwcsonichu: it was still called for.
  VIVItheG: no it wasn't
  cwcsonichu: but forget about that.
  VIVItheG: you have to realize
  VIVItheG: that your behavior
  VIVItheG: is not suitable for the public
  VIVItheG: you have to change yourself
  cwcsonichu: that was years ago that happened.
  VIVItheG: still
  VIVItheG: you don't seem to recognize why that was wrong
  VIVItheG: for you, maybe it was right, but you have to consider the other people
  cwcsonichu: I DID RECOGNIZE.
  VIVItheG: 
  cwcsonichu: they just didn't like me hanging around there; they're all a bunch of jerks.
  VIVItheG: You seem to blame them
  VIVItheG: not yourself
  cwcsonichu: the other people didn't have their heart played with terribly.
  VIVItheG: i mean you weren't suspicious at all?
  VIVItheG: people just don't go up to another preson and say I need a boyfriend
  VIVItheG: that's not how it works
  cwcsonichu: REWIND; I, myself, NEED a Girlfriend.
  VIVItheG: yes
  VIVItheG: But you didn't think twice
  VIVItheG: about someone coming up to you out of the blue
  cwcsonichu: I was desperate then.
  cwcsonichu: as well.
  cwcsonichu: and I still didn't know better.
  cwcsonichu: I am a mess.
  cwcsonichu: a mess of issues.
  VIVItheG: yes
  VIVItheG: you need to see a professional
  VIVItheG: i can't help you
  VIVItheG: i've realized that now
  VIVItheG: you need to seek professional help
  VIVItheG: ask your parents
  VIVItheG: i'm sure they will help you with that
  cwcsonichu: I have seen a psyciatrist; no help. and my parents are old; still no help.
  VIVItheG: no
  VIVItheG: i mean they can most likely help you
  VIVItheG: find a professional
  VIVItheG: i mean
  cwcsonichu: a professional what?
  VIVItheG: therapist
  VIVItheG: someone
  VIVItheG: who helps people deal with their problems
  cwcsonichu: therapist = Psyciatrist.
  VIVItheG: okay sure
  VIVItheG: just look for one
  VIVItheG: you have a new set of problems
  VIVItheG: maybe looking for one now
  VIVItheG: will be the best choice
  VIVItheG: because i honestly can't help you
  VIVItheG: i've tried for 3 hours now
  VIVItheG: and it's like fighting a wall
  VIVItheG: i can't beat the wall no matter how hard i try
  cwcsonichu: eventually, you make a dent.
  VIVItheG: yes
  VIVItheG: but with the help
  VIVItheG: of someone else
  VIVItheG: look for a therapist, psyciatrist
  VIVItheG: whatever
  VIVItheG: just do it
  VIVItheG: trust me
  VIVItheG: you may not think they help
  VIVItheG: but at least you tried looking for help
  VIVItheG: finding a girlfriend is the least of your problems
  VIVItheG: you have more issues to deal with
  cwcsonichu: yes I did.
  VIVItheG: before you can even begin to i don't know
  VIVItheG: just
  VIVItheG: a job maybe
  VIVItheG: school maybe
  VIVItheG: something
  cwcsonichu: a therapist costs money; what I really need is a close gal-pal.
  VIVItheG: you seem to have plenty of money
  VIVItheG: the government gives you mony
  VIVItheG: ey
  VIVItheG: money
  VIVItheG: i can type i swear
  VIVItheG: you seem to have plenty
  VIVItheG: use it for something more than just whatever you normally spend it on
  cwcsonichu: I am not Mr. Joe Millionaire.
  VIVItheG: get some help
  VIVItheG: but you seem to have a lot of shit in your room
  VIVItheG: sell some of that
  cwcsonichu: I have bills.
  cwcsonichu: I'm not sellin'
  VIVItheG: why
  VIVItheG: what is more important
  VIVItheG: those things
  VIVItheG: or mental help
  cwcsonichu: I don't want to.
  VIVItheG: You have to let go chris
  VIVItheG: those things shouldn't mean such
  VIVItheG: a attachment
  VIVItheG: material goods
  VIVItheG: is not something that brings happiness
  VIVItheG: i know this
  cwcsonichu: you don't think I didn't know that either.
  VIVItheG: then why won't you sell them
  cwcsonichu: I just don't want to.
  VIVItheG: why
  cwcsonichu: and I don't need to.
  VIVItheG: that's not a good reason
  VIVItheG: because
  VIVItheG: you apparently
  VIVItheG: don't have money
  VIVItheG: so get some
  VIVItheG: get some help
  cwcsonichu: I don't need money to get help.
  VIVItheG: what kind of help are you thinking of
  cwcsonichu: and I don't need a professional.
  VIVItheG: Yes you do
  VIVItheG: Yes you do chris
  cwcsonichu: I have the people of my church.
  VIVItheG: you already got kicked out of one church
  VIVItheG: i mean
  VIVItheG: how are they going to help
  cwcsonichu: my CURRENT church can help me a LOT better than any "professional"
  VIVItheG: and how have they helped
  VIVItheG: so far
  VIVItheG: chris
  cwcsonichu: because God and Jesus supports them as well.
  VIVItheG: and how will god and jesus help you
  cwcsonichu: they guide a lot of people.
  VIVItheG: chris
  VIVItheG: do you think god is helping you right now
  VIVItheG: sending all these trolls after you
  VIVItheG: sending all these failed relatioinships after you
  cwcsonichu: in a way, yes.
  VIVItheG: ...really.
  cwcsonichu: he is helping me.
  cwcsonichu: have you read the bible?
  VIVItheG: he seems to just be making your life worse.
  VIVItheG: no.
  cwcsonichu: go read it, or join a church.
  VIVItheG: why
  cwcsonichu: so you can learn for yourself.
  cwcsonichu: the lessons behind God's will.
  VIVItheG: do you think god will help you
  VIVItheG: eventually
  cwcsonichu: yes
  VIVItheG: how do you think so
  VIVItheG: In what way
  cwcsonichu: I just do.
  VIVItheG: okay then
  VIVItheG: come back to me in 3 years
  VIVItheG: and tell me that alright.
  cwcsonichu: why 3 years?
  VIVItheG: because that is how long
  VIVItheG: i believe you will realize
  VIVItheG: that god is not going to help you
  VIVItheG: in that amount of time
  VIVItheG: you will be much worse off than you are now
  VIVItheG: that is what i believe
  cwcsonichu: what are you, an athiest?
  VIVItheG: daoist
  cwcsonichu: what is that?
  VIVItheG: my sect
  cwcsonichu: okay.
  VIVItheG: believes in principles
  cwcsonichu: I see.
  VIVItheG: of detachment from material goods
  VIVItheG: the way of being able to live life through non-action
  VIVItheG: which means that you should not do anything rash
  VIVItheG: unless you wish your life to be a living hell
  cwcsonichu: I see.
  VIVItheG: the believe in that you should be an active person
  cwcsonichu: I am
  VIVItheG: and help others
  cwcsonichu: I do
  VIVItheG: and what is your problem with atheiests
  cwcsonichu: I don't know, but I do know that they are not believers of God and Jesus.
  VIVItheG: so what?
  VIVItheG: let them respect whatever they choose to believe in
  VIVItheG: there are so many religions in this world
  VIVItheG: okay but let's not talk about that
  VIVItheG: i'm here to try to help you
  VIVItheG: and i want you
  VIVItheG: to seek some professional help
  VIVItheG: god appears in abstract ways
  VIVItheG: but i want you to seek some concrete help
  VIVItheG: from another person
  VIVItheG: please
  VIVItheG: i beg of you man
  cwcsonichu: I will consider it.
  VIVItheG: please don't just consider it, please do it.