Talk:Fridays After Five

To Do

I don't normally do this whole to do thing, but...

• Get a gallery of this stuff up.
• put up the video like we have all his others.

Maybe get some more background information, if we can.--Beat 02:59, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

That was quick.--Beat 20:26, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

What we can get out of this

These files prove that Chris is actually going to more social even its, influenced by rocky, but also we learned that he is creepy enough to wear his bra in public and he still dances like a turkey mating. Considering the bra is more like a "sign" of some sorts, could this be added into the "love quest" page?.--Basgon 01:55, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

This latest turn of events has proven that Chris trolls himself harder than anyone else ever could. --BreadGod 01:58, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Chris is actually going out now, huh? I think it's clear it won't work and once Chris realizes this he'll be back to his old self again. Come to think of it, we could use this video to give him a false sense of paranoia, by claiming we have people following him. This could get us a nice reaction.--Hiiro 02:10, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Did anybody else notice the absence of the Medallion of Fail? Any other photo? It's kind of historic if he really ventured out of his cubbyhole without it, whatever the reason. Also, the (wraparound?) glasses. --ErsatzHouse 05:58, 21 June 2010 (UTC)

You know, the last time he was out this much was during his love quest, getting his ass kicked by jerkops and manajerks in the real world. Perhaps we can start seeing something similar in the near future? Bill Lumburg 02:17, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

We can hope. In the meantime I called Chris and left a message saying that the trolls are now stalking him in real life now, going with Hirro's idea to give him paranoia. I figure we can try scaring him back onto the internet. --Edward 02:24, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

I also sent him an e-mail message linking to the videos recorded of him at the event with the subject stating that he was being followed. --BreadGod 02:27, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Yay~ People liked my idea. But if we're going with it, we'll need more sightings. Also, Independence day surprise?--Hiiro 05:52, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Yes... he truly has nowhere to run now. And I hope Clyde hasn't forgotten his promise for an Independence Day surprise. Bill Lumburg 02:28, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

I completely forgot about that Sinisterminister 04:00, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

He had better not have forgotten it. Because if he does, I'LL STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CASH! Seriously though. We need a PS3 hacking. Soon. --Edward 02:30, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

I think we should all thank our greatest operative, Rochelle Shoemaker, for this bounty of lulz.--MoarLurk 02:36, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Good thing this happened. Now to wait for him to check his e-mail, then my crazed troll plan will start... --Eniggy the Trollish 02:48, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

• I love how the first thing that popped into everyone's mind was "Gay Trucker"... That alone will be enough for Chris to loose his shit. On a side note, Chris now officially fails at dancing and public decency (If wearing a shirt that says "I love vagina" to a family event doesn't do it, I don't know what does) --SargentPickles 22:53, 18 June 2010 (EST)
  • /me waits for the cops to knock at his door... Eniggy the HAHAHA 03:05, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Heh, this might have something to do with an email I sent him. I suggested he check out Desert Punk It's about a lecherous twat who's obsessed with getting laid, but women find him rude and repulsive. It's got plenty of fan service though, and the main character, despite being depicted as a loser when it comes to sex, is still standard anime fare badass-goofy (like Vash the Stampede in Trigun) so it should appeal to him. There is one story element that I was hoping Chris would see and not go over his head, the introduction of the loli character. To quote the wiki article

"Kosuna is the former apprentice of the Shimmer Sniper. Her goal is to become the desert's number one "power babe" mercenary, meaning stronger than any man and more beautiful than any woman. After the Shimmer Sniper is defeated by Kanta, Kosuna follows him and constantly begs to be made his apprentice. Kanta highly objects at first but eventually accepts her after she shows him a picture of a large breasted woman Kosuna claims to be her mother, implying how attractive Kosuna would be in years to come. Kanta, a heavily perverted guy, can't help but accept her, though his personal motives are clearly to groom Kosuna to be his personal mate when she grows up."

Sounds like building a sweetheart from the ground up, 'eh? I never got a reply, despite sending it to his gmail, aol, and youtube accounts. If he did read it and check it out, this could be indicative of his apparent courtship of little girls. --Xanabit 04:51, 18 June 2010 (UTC)

He wasn't courting little girls, the girls got near him because he had a DS and they wanted to play it too. --BreadGod 04:54, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

In that pic, maybe. Why else would he boogie down surrounded by delicious loli while wearing his new "attraction ensemble"? --Xanabit 05:02, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

You're putting way too much thought into this. Chris isn't a pedophile, he's just really, really stupid and socially inept. --BreadGod 05:17, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Neither was that character. Another episode had them sharing a sleeping bag the survive a cold desert night, and he freaked out. The intent is for Chris to get the idea that creating a close bond with one or a harem of loli will enable him to brainwash the little tykes into something he can fuck in a few years. The deviousness comes from the fact that Chris is incapable understanding boundaries and his idea that showing minors porn is "educational". --Xanabit 05:23, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Oh god, this was creepy. Spotting him amongst the crowd was like watching those 'Slender Man' videos, only it was insanely easy to find the horror. I think this proves that, when left to his own devices, Chris A) Acts more like a dumbass than ever before, or B) Gets himself into trouble with the law. I was afraid he was going to try to murder someone, but this proves he's a perfectly healthy human being. Also, I hope the little girl in the photo said 'no' when he likely offered her candy. --Inferno232 19 June 2010

More likely, if he had any candy, he would have eaten it all himself. Sakanz 00:25, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

You know what Chris? Stay off the internet. You're even more of a lolcow in real life. Seriously, this is hilariously creepy and awesome. Definitely add this into the Love Quest page, because his crappy "Captain Morgan" pose in multiple different places with his... bra sign... cruelly in plain sight of everyone is an obvious extension of his love search. Except I think the Gameboy and sign was slightly better for him, because at least then he could get sympathy. This is literally indecent and just disgusting. I'm a fat guy myself, and I'd never even consider just randomly taking my shirt off in a public place. Let alone if I was wearing a bra...(KingoftheJuice 05:58, 19 June 2010 (UTC))

The only downside to that is someone has to be there to record him acting like a dumbass in public, or else we'd never know any of the shit he gets himself into. We lucked out this time. There's probably plenty of times he did stuff like this when noone was around to film him or take pictures of him and we'll never know unless Chris mentions it himself with plenty of bias, no doubt. Sakanz 00:30, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

What can you get outta this? This is what happens when you live 28 years of your life as a pathetic diagnosis holder locked up in your room. Seriously, just look at how pasty white his arms and gigantic gut are. Clearly those alone should be a testament to how very little sunlight he gets. TRock 21, June 2010

Take the picture of him doing the Captain Morgan pose in the bra and put it on a dating or gay relations website. And then send him the results. I mean, I know this has been done before, but still... -Inferno232 05:06, 25 June 2010 (UTC)

Started a video box.

Added the 100_0690.MOV thru 100_0692.MOV as a starter. Eniggy the still HAHAHA 04:23, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Why show his bra?

Clearly, Chris doesn't have any compunctions about proving to the world that he wears women's underwear because he's a retard, but being that this was clearly a family event and he was wearing a shirt about pussy, could Jerkops have made him change? Any way of knowing? —Thepicklesuitintheman 05:38, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

If he keeps coming back and someone complains, it's likely the jerkops will intervene. And this time, in front of hundreds of witnesses. Bill Lumburg 05:51, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

• I would say, with something like this, Jerkops could have gotten him to change the shirt easily, though if this was a free event, which I wouldn't be surprised at all, they probably wouldn't fully enforce it. The bra, on the other hand, is completely different. If a woman was running around in her bra, yes, they would stop her, but this is Chris we're talking about here. Since he's a guy, I'm guessing they don't see many guys running around in bras, so they wouldn't think twice.--Blazer 05:56, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Can't he be charged for indecent exposure or dissorderly conduct or something?--Hiiro

• Probably not, since he's not actually indecently exposing anything. It's not illegal as far as I know for a man to go around shirtless, and this seems to be more of an outdoor community street fair, so I don't think policies like that can really be enforced. Even if they were, he's not technically shirtless, since he's wearing a bra. But he should definitely have to change the shirt, with so many little kids around. Well, at least it's better than the Mount and Dew Me one. Seeing as that one is a legitimately homosexual t-shirt. (KingoftheJuice 06:02, 19 June 2010 (UTC))
  • Yeah, in most every place I know of in the USA a man can go topless, though a woman can't. So Chris wearing a bra in public wouldn't be indecent exposure. BubblegumPinkButler 23:45, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
• This whole thing makes me wonder if it ever crossed Chris Chan's retarded brain (or lack thereof) that a man walking around in a sports bra is gay? That boy is so far in the closet that he's in fuckin' Narnia. User:Jerkop421 20-06-2010, 0632 Hours (GMT).
  • No, no, no. Chris is SO STRAIGHT that he BLOCKED OFF his closet so he could not POSSIBLY BE IN IT!.--MoarLurk 06:54, 21 June 2010 (UTC)

The innocent

The girl's face is blocked in the cropped photo but the one in the gallery remains clear. What's the policy then? Nechita 06:35, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

It's a joke--Wintermute 06:48, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

There are more photos

Post them all. --Sonijew is back 10:18, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

• Get to it then :p. Also, we need an uncensored version of that one with the kid. Justification - 1) whoever made the set ("Archie Bunker") would have censored it if he felt like it was a concern for the child, 2) a child's privacy is probably not going to be threatened by inclusion in a picture, 3) I can't think of any troll who is obsessed enough to track down a girl who look at Chris in a picture just to get info or whatever from her. --Champthom 16:03, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Also it's badly edited - looks terrible. --Anonymax 16:45, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Pokéwalker?

What the hell does he use that for?--OrsonZedd 14:16, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

I played a downloaded version of Heartgold so I didn't get one, but it's my understanding that you put one of your pokemon in it or onto it and when you walk around it gives the pokemon xp. So, he uses it to level up his pokemon. --masta beta alum 14:29, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

According to Wikipedia:

The Pokéwalker is a Poké Ball-shaped pedometer which can connect to Pokémon HeartGold and SoulSilver game cards via infrared signals. The player can transfer a Pokémon to the Pokéwalker from either HeartGold or SoulSilver. Every time the player takes a step, the Pokémon inside gains experience points and the player earns "Watts", a type of in-game currency which was also used on the Pokémon Pikachu virtual pet. Players can also catch various Pokémon on the device and obtain items, then transfer them to the game. The device comes bundled with the games.

--Anonymax 15:19, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

• I confirm. I have seen such a device onto action and it is quite easy to accumulate xp. If I remember clearly, it gives the owner a single xp by step. So this will not influence the girth of our manchild. Griffintown 04:48, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

I can't believe it

Why is he wearing a manbra with writing. and WHY hasnt the police arrested him or something for doing that. T_T The poor children are scared....especially when he dances with em, what a PEDOFORK. >.< BabyNeko

• As long as he isn't causing a problem with it the messages on his clothing are technically covered by the first amendment. At least if it's on public property. ---ConCat 15:42, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

This is fucking hilarious

It's true... Chris trolls himself harder than we do.

I say we leave him off the internet for a while and observe him, see if he does more dumb shit. If not (or nothing out of the ordinary), we can always get him back with Hiiro's plan of making him paranoid. Doctor Nuriel 17:37, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

• I had thoughts of sending him an email full of shots of his house from Google Maps with the Google crap cropped out along with random gay porn pictures in an attachment to him to see how scared he gets. -- Eniggy the Cunning 17:51, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
  • you are a huge faggot and that's a horrible idea. -- Boop 19:51, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

Maybe it's just me, but

In some of these videos/pictures, when Chris is standing with his back to the crowd, it looks to me like he's sticking his ass out as far as he can. Remember, Chris thinks he has a great ass (can't remember where he said that, so if you guys know please tell me), so it wouldn't surprise me if this was an intentional ploy to get a gal-pal, though it ends up looking unnatural and creepy. Best example: this image in which he is sitting, but in a manner which to me looks incredibly unnatural. Thelieisacake 18:30, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Don't remember him saying this, but totally possible. Pic related. --Sonijew is back 18:38, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

He's definitely posing. What's more the only time he wasn't posing is when he was playing the Vidja. Every time he's trying to position himself to appear cool and relaxed, and ends up looking awkward and terrifying. I'm sure in his mind this makes him incredibly attractive to the ladies, but we all know how good Chris's mind is.--Beat 20:29, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Isn't one effect of autism not knowing how to position yourself in a "natural" way? Chris might just fail at standing and/or posture. God knows he doesn't have much practice at either. -Schismtracer 01:36, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

Yes, it is. Stereotypy (IE, repetitive movements) is a symptom of it, and often manifests in posing or rocking. BubblegumPinkButler 07:23, 21 June 2010 (UTC)

So how long has it been?

I added a minor note on Chris mentioning FAF in the 6/6/2010 video. Can anyone confirm or deny if 6/4 was the first time he visited the event? I know the 6/6 video was the first time he talked about it.--AdderCress 01:35, 21 June 2010 (UTC)

Next Friday after Five?

If he has been going regularly to these events, then there's a a good chance that he will resurface again this Friday. Do we have any agents who will be in the area to confirm? This could become a regular attraction location for him, and we should get as much video proof of his misadventures as we can before he's inevitably thrown out. --SargentPickles 11:43, 21 June 2010 (EST)

We have at least one known agent in the area; I'm sure the rest have been alerted to look out for him. Of course, the fact that Chris may be on to use may mean he's not showing up anymore. Bill Lumburg 15:46, 21 June 2010 (UTC)

Just an observation

Does the Chris Dance remind anyone else of the music video for Rubber Johnny? --manwithoutabody 18:14, 21 June 2010 (CEST)

Enjoy Coca Cola Vagina

The article says the operative saw Chris wearing a shirt saying "I Enjoy Vagina," but I bet it was just "Enjoy Vagina." I bet it was this shirt, which parodies Coca Cola, much like his "Mount and Do Me" shirt parodied Mountain Dew. This and its red color are all I have as evidence, but still, this soda-themed t-shirt prurience might be a pattern that could eventually be added to the Chris and fashion section, if not elsewhere. --GrannyT 16:52, 22 June 2010 (UTC)

• He's mentioned Spencer's Gifts before, hasn't he? I looked for the shirt online and couldn't find it. I'm sure they don't have their whole catalog on the site or whatever. Not sure if he got them there. Just saying. —Thepicklesuitintheman 16:56, 22 June 2010 (UTC)

• See this image: [[1]] Pretty sure it's the same shirt. Anonymous one 20:52, 22 June 2010 (UTC)

• I think anonymous one's right. That shirts a pretty direct match. We all know the shirts are basically the new attraction sign, but why the fuck do they all have to do with soda?--Beat 21:33, 22 June 2010 (UTC)

Chris really likes soda... --Xanabit 23:12, 22 June 2010 (UTC)

Is Stalking Him Legal?

I mean, I am not trying to defend Chris here or anything, but taking pictures of him without him knowing and encouraging people to send in any pictures of him...there's something about this that seems like Chris could call the police for (he thinks people are after him). I just want to clarify. --SpaceScreaminJohn 23:29, 27 June 2010 (UTC)

Even if he did, he'll likely ramble on about internet people - and I don't think our field agents are going to be easily identified. --Anonymax 23:46, 27 June 2010 (UTC)

He's in a public area and he's not being followed into a bathroom or some other place with a reasonable expectation of privacy. It might qualify as low-level harassment, but probably nothing more serious. -Schismtracer 03:42, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

Please look at this site and then tell me how taking pictures of the manchild in a public area can be considered as illegal. Griffintown 03:46, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

Chris Has Been Spotted Again

That's twice now. Once last month, once this month. --Eniggy 01:29, 10 July 2010 (UTC)

• Hmm, no gay trucker or desperate attraction signs this time. Either he knows were watching him or someone finally told him how the lame these tactics were. I'm guessing the 1st option --SargentPickles 03:26, 10 July 2010 (UTC)
• No, look between his legs in the photo taken from behind--he's got something there. An Attraction Sign.--MoarLurk 03:48, 10 July 2010 (UTC)

• Another proof that celebrate this well-known fact; Chris never learns. Pity we don't have an angle on the sign's text. Let's hope for it in the next sighting. Griffintown 04:05, 10 July 2010 (UTC)

• Isn't the July 9th sighting the same as the July 4th sighting? I took it to mean it was the same sighting, both occuring on the 4th. -Mp83 15:44, 10 July 2010 (UTC)