Chrs-Chan Pure Pulse-Jolt Lance

Chrs-Chan [sic] Pure Pulse-Jolt Lance is the signature attack of Chris-Chan Pure, the duo of Chris-Chan Sonichu and Crystallina Rosechu. The move has been used only twice, owing to the fact that Crystal was trapped in the Dark Mirror Hole one issue after her introduction in Sonichu #4.

Description

Stolen from this crappy anime.

In a retarded fancomic which rips off anime as a matter of course, the Lance still manages to stand out as the most absurd, weeaboo move in the entire series.

The attack was first used in the finale of Sonichu 4. Crystal had just rescued Chris from the clutches of Mary Lee Walsh in The Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens. Determined to end the threat of PVCC once and for all, the duo joined hands. Chris-Chan summoned Blue Thunder, while Crystallina summoned Orange Thunder. Holding their free hands in the air, they spoke the following words:

CRYSTAL: Our Unique, Wonderful Souls....

CHRIS-CHAN: ... shall crush your Evil Hearts and Dark Souls!

They then pointed their free hands at Walsh's crystal ball, the orange and blue energy blasts mingling together as they converged. The resulting destruction not only destroyed the crystal ball, but reversed Walsh's spell, changing the Private Villa back into Piedmont Valley Community College. Walsh and Count Graduon were unharmed, as they wisely teleported away before the attack was completed.

In Sonichu 5, the Chris-Chan Pure used the attack again, this time to defeat the CADD Chef during Mary Lee Walsh's invasion of CWCville. The same motions were used, except this time the tandem used a slightly different speech:

CRYSTALLINA: Our Unique Souls...

CHRIS-CHAN: ... shall brighten and crush your Black Hearts!

The extent of the damage done to the CADD Chef was not depicted in the comic, although it was not seen again for the rest of the battle, so it was most likely rendered inoperable, at the very least.

Shortly afterward, Crystal became trapped in the Dark Mirror, where she remained until Chris just picked her up and left, though she hasn't done anything since, This, combined with Chris's claim that he's removing himself from the comic, leaves the future of Chris Chan Pure, and their Chrs-Chan Pure Pulse-Jolt Lance, in doubt.

Proper Spelling

While the name of the attack was almost certainly intended to be the "Chris-Chan Pure Pulse-Jolt Lance", Chris identified it both times in the comic as spelled without the letter "i", as if this were his intention.

Gallery

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  CHRS-CHAN

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  PURE

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  PULSE-JOLT

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  LANCE!

Inspiration

The attack motions and speech are a rather shameless rip of the attack done by the heroes of the Anime series Pretty Cure, right down to the "beautiful souls crushing evil hearts" part. The only part of the attack that wasn't stolen was the name; since the attack is called Marble Screw, this is considered a lost opportunity.

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