Kenneth Erwin Engelhardt
| Kenneth Erwin Englehardt | |
|---|---|
| |
| Kengle | |
| Full Name | Kenneth Erwin Englehardt |
| Nicknames | Kengle, Kennay |
| Religion | Muslim |
| Age | 56 |
| Gender | Male |
| Nationality | American |
| Race | White |
| Education | A certificate in basic Twitter usage |
| Occupation(s) | Freelance writer, comic book artist, sculptor, full-time ass-kisser, lolcow collector |
Kenneth Erwin Englehardt, affectionately known among trolls as Kengle, is Chris's primary ass-kisser on Facebook. As a fat, autistic, inept, unemployed middle-aged man with a penchant for creating horrifying, warped artwork, Ken feels as though he shares a lot in common with Chris. Along with making up 10% of Chris's total medallion sales, Kenneth posts on every status update that Chris posts, usually offering some inane comment. Ken is considered a lolcow in his own right, due to his bizarre clip-art collage art, depicting his Sonichu fan-franchise Sonichen. He is also dubbed "the lolcow collector," due to having befriended several prominent lolcows - Chris being the main focus of his autism - on Facebook. Much like our autistic zero, Ken is fond of picking something up, trying it out and then dropping it when his interests shift in another direction.
In another parallel to our autistic hero, he has an obsession with a woman who doesn't even acknowledge his existence - in this case, one Gloria Tesch, a talentless sub-DeviantArt-level author using her dad's money to fund a full-length movie that will likely be outsold by outlawed pornography, and unquestionably a lolcow in her own right.
It's worth nothing that Ken, perhaps the only person in the world to ever admire Chris for anything other than comedic value, is 56 years old and has been employed for a few weeks of his life.
Relationship with Chris
In many ways, Ken is the Rosechu to Chris's Sonichu; a useless borderline-NPC character who shows up occasionally to be mildly annoying. Besides showing up on every Chris status update to offer an arbitrary declaration, or an opinion with no elaboration whatsoever, Ken buys a huge amount of Chris's crap on eBay. He has commissioned several medallions, including one of his horrifying fan-character, Sonichen. Ken's intentions towards Chris seem entirely innocent - although he'll occasionally make what appears to be a subtle jab at Chris, these are overshadowed by the praise he heaps on Chris for heroic acts such as sculpting a medallion, having an opinion on a video game, and breathing in and out.
Ken once tried to host an anti-bullying website, hoping to cash in on Chris's Sonic Boom protests - the prize being recognition from Chris, something we all strive to achieve. That went about as well as you'd expect.
Chris barely acknowledges Ken. Chris immediately dismissed Ken's forum and fan-site without so much as a cursory glance. Ken is regularly confirmed to have bought medallions from Chris on eBay in order to eke out a "thank you" from Chris on eBay.
Relationship with Chris's trolls
Ken was banned from the Kiwi Farms because he does not seem to comprehend that there are mean people on the Internet who want to bully Chris and people connected to Chris, and instead believes that everyone is genuinely just interested in Chris as a cool famous Internet dude who everyone wants to befriend. His thread on the forum, 120+ pages and steadily climbing, is testament to how well that turned out for him. Many Chris trolls are interested in Kengle as a sort of "second-tier" lolcow - he is very active on Facebook, posting his bizarre creations and generally making a fool of himself, sometimes involving Chris in the process. Many trolls are morbidly curious to see more of Kenneth's horrifying creations, which are vaguely reminiscent of low-budget Eldritch abominations.