Difference between revisions of "Template:Article of the now"

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(I PRAY TO GOD AND JESUS TO KILL JASON KENDRICK HOWELL)
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'''Jason Kendrick Howell''' is the original creator of the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|"Chris-chan" ED page]]. [[Chris]] wanted to call the [[jerkops]] on Howell for allegedly having sex with an [[BlueSpike|underage girl]], [[Kathleen Nicole Wallace]]. (Spoiler: Howell never did have that underage sex.) Howell goes by [[Metal Gear Solid|"Liquid Snake"]] on [[4chan]]'s /v/. [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 6th, 2008|According to Chris]], he is also "the Dork of Ages", a phrase [[ripoffs|stolen]] from ''[[American Dad!]]''
In [[March 2026]], ''Hyperdimension Neptunia'' announced a new game set for August, which introduces new official characters. Among those are '''CPU Blue Heart''' Ciel of Lastation (a reference to [[Sony]]), with a backstory contradicting Chris's lore. An upset Chris took to spamming the Twitter feeds of official accounts promoting ''Neptunia'' as well as accounts of fans approving of Ciel's design. In his tweets, Chris angrily claimed himself the real Blue Heart and attempted to convince ''Neptunia'' to change Ciel's title.


After Chris discovered the [[ED]] page he had some e-mail correspondence with Jason, from which Chris got Jason's phone number. Chris later used the phone number to find the city which Jason lived in, as well as tracing down his [[MySpace]] page, where he found [[Kathleen Nicole Wallace]] by looking at Jason's friend list. Chris made the assumption that Kathleen was Jason's girlfriend and Jason has had sex with her, which, combined with Kathleen's status as a seventeen-year-old, led to his accusation of Jason having underage sex. Chris also took note of the background image on Jason's [[MySpace]] page, and based Jason's appearance in the comic upon that picture.
According to Chris, CPU Blue Heart (also known as Scarlett Celestia and later Scarlet LaRose) is the [[Hyperdimension Neptunia|Console Patron Unit]] Goddess of the Nations of [[CWCville]] and Comma, and of the [[Commodore|Commodore Consoles]]. Conceived by Chris after being force-fed ''Hyperdimension Neptunia'' lore by the [[Idea Guys]], Scarlett serves as one of his escapist alter egos, providing a [[coping|coping mechanism]] and enabling his [[messiah complex]]. Through this alter ego, Chris has also emerged as the figurehead of the [[Dimensional Merge]], with his own [[Enablers|group of "worshippers"]].


('''[[Jason Kendrick Howell|Read more...]]''')
('''[[CPU Blue Heart|More...]]''')
 
 
<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits pride of place on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a way of displaying some of the better quality articles on the CWCki. It is not usually the article that describes the most recent Chris-related event, though it often can be. Suggestions for new articles to be displayed here can be discussed either on [[Template_talk:Article_of_the_now|this template's talk page]], or on the [[CWCki:Community Portal‎]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]] [[Category: Pages that have been edited by Chris]]</noinclude>

Latest revision as of 10:11, 1 April 2026

CPU Blue Heart Real.png

In March 2026, Hyperdimension Neptunia announced a new game set for August, which introduces new official characters. Among those are CPU Blue Heart Ciel of Lastation (a reference to Sony), with a backstory contradicting Chris's lore. An upset Chris took to spamming the Twitter feeds of official accounts promoting Neptunia as well as accounts of fans approving of Ciel's design. In his tweets, Chris angrily claimed himself the real Blue Heart and attempted to convince Neptunia to change Ciel's title.

According to Chris, CPU Blue Heart (also known as Scarlett Celestia and later Scarlet LaRose) is the Console Patron Unit Goddess of the Nations of CWCville and Comma, and of the Commodore Consoles. Conceived by Chris after being force-fed Hyperdimension Neptunia lore by the Idea Guys, Scarlett serves as one of his escapist alter egos, providing a coping mechanism and enabling his messiah complex. Through this alter ego, Chris has also emerged as the figurehead of the Dimensional Merge, with his own group of "worshippers".

(More...)

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