Difference between revisions of "Template:Article of the now"

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On 24 [[July 2009]], a video of [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] '''humping his beloved [[PS3]]''' was leaked onto [[4-cent garbage]]'s /v/. In it, Chris makes love to his "Life Upgrade" for eight minutes, although he can only stay standing for the first minute. What might at first seem to be just an impressive display of fanboyism is actually a desperate plea for the return of his international [[PlayStation Network]] accounts, seemingly being held to ransom by the irrational expert hacker [[Jack Thaddeus]].
In [[March 2026]], ''Hyperdimension Neptunia'' announced a new game set for August, which introduces new official characters. Among those are '''CPU Blue Heart''' Ciel of Lastation (a reference to [[Sony]]), with a backstory contradicting Chris's lore. An upset Chris took to spamming the Twitter feeds of official accounts promoting ''Neptunia'' as well as accounts of fans approving of Ciel's design. In his tweets, Chris angrily claimed himself the real Blue Heart and attempted to convince ''Neptunia'' to change Ciel's title.


Chris himself sat in on an [[IRC (23 July 2009)|IRC chat]] where a coterie of [[trolls]] planned the making of the video, where he believed that he had effectively hidden his identity. Bits of Chris's monologue are simply repetitions of what he heard during the chat.
According to Chris, CPU Blue Heart (also known as Scarlett Celestia and later Scarlet LaRose) is the [[Hyperdimension Neptunia|Console Patron Unit]] Goddess of the Nations of [[CWCville]] and Comma, and of the [[Commodore|Commodore Consoles]]. Conceived by Chris after being force-fed ''Hyperdimension Neptunia'' lore by the [[Idea Guys]], Scarlett serves as one of his escapist alter egos, providing a [[coping|coping mechanism]] and enabling his [[messiah complex]]. Through this alter ego, Chris has also emerged as the figurehead of the [[Dimensional Merge]], with his own [[Enablers|group of "worshippers"]].


In his wisdom, Thaddeus never returned the PSN accounts to this day.
('''[[CPU Blue Heart|More...]]''')
 
('''[[Chris humps his PS3|More...]]''')

Latest revision as of 10:11, 1 April 2026

CPU Blue Heart Real.png

In March 2026, Hyperdimension Neptunia announced a new game set for August, which introduces new official characters. Among those are CPU Blue Heart Ciel of Lastation (a reference to Sony), with a backstory contradicting Chris's lore. An upset Chris took to spamming the Twitter feeds of official accounts promoting Neptunia as well as accounts of fans approving of Ciel's design. In his tweets, Chris angrily claimed himself the real Blue Heart and attempted to convince Neptunia to change Ciel's title.

According to Chris, CPU Blue Heart (also known as Scarlett Celestia and later Scarlet LaRose) is the Console Patron Unit Goddess of the Nations of CWCville and Comma, and of the Commodore Consoles. Conceived by Chris after being force-fed Hyperdimension Neptunia lore by the Idea Guys, Scarlett serves as one of his escapist alter egos, providing a coping mechanism and enabling his messiah complex. Through this alter ego, Chris has also emerged as the figurehead of the Dimensional Merge, with his own group of "worshippers".

(More...)

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