Difference between revisions of "Template:Article of the now"

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(Jail Letter - 19 September 2021 AKA the Jesus letter)
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'''Lesbian Sex Audition''' is a [[YouTube]] video uploaded by Chris (as '''IMG 3207''') on 31 [[May 2016]], in which he shows off his unappreciated acrobatic sexual prowess in hopes to impress a [[Tomgirl|lesbian]] couple, Sam and Ellen, who hoped to raise a baby by means of [[Hanky-Panky|natural impregnation]]. Its contents are essentially a more SFW version of [[For Julie's Eyes Only]] (mostly because he's not technically naked). Chris attempts to demonstrate his sexual prowess with a [[Sex_toys|blow-up doll]], explaining his actions as he goes along, with the notion that he will treat Sam or Ellen to this sort of sexual experience should they allow him to impregnate one of them. He starts simple, attempting to perform cunnilingus on the doll's stomach and shoving his face in its rear with the offer of anal to Sam and Ellen (even though this categorically couldn't impregnate them) but moves on to advanced techniques such as helicoptering the doll around on his dick, all the while humming childish tunes and imitating voices. The tour-de-force concludes with Chris claiming that spinning a plastic sex doll on top of him for a few minutes was "[[Obesity|a good workout]]" and mentioning that his [[Duck|dick]] is "five, seven inches long".
On 19 [[September 2021]], [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] wrote '''an open letter from [[Chris's homes#Central Virginia Regional Jail|jail]]''' to an unknown individual while awaiting court hearings on a charge of [[Affair with Mother|incest]]. He asked the recipient to relay the contents to [[Null]] and to deliver the physical document to Chris's attorney, David Heilberg. Null uploaded the scanned letter to [[Kiwi Farms]] on 24 September.


('''[[Lesbian Sex Audition|More...]]''')
In the letter, Chris indicates that he has taken an interest in the Bible, likely provided to him as part of his jail accommodations. However, he also seems to be under the impression that he is Jesus of Nazareth reincarnated on top of his existing delusions about the [[Dimensional Merge]], citing this revelation to an apparent similarity in appearance between Western depictions of Jesus and himself (ignoring, of course, that Jesus was a swarthy Middle Eastern Jew and not a pale-skinned Anglo-American like him, and that the main thing he has in common with "White Jesus" is his long hair).
 
('''[[Jail Letter - 19 September 2021|More...]]''')

Revision as of 11:56, 5 May 2025

JesusChris.jpg

On 19 September 2021, Chris wrote an open letter from jail to an unknown individual while awaiting court hearings on a charge of incest. He asked the recipient to relay the contents to Null and to deliver the physical document to Chris's attorney, David Heilberg. Null uploaded the scanned letter to Kiwi Farms on 24 September.

In the letter, Chris indicates that he has taken an interest in the Bible, likely provided to him as part of his jail accommodations. However, he also seems to be under the impression that he is Jesus of Nazareth reincarnated on top of his existing delusions about the Dimensional Merge, citing this revelation to an apparent similarity in appearance between Western depictions of Jesus and himself (ignoring, of course, that Jesus was a swarthy Middle Eastern Jew and not a pale-skinned Anglo-American like him, and that the main thing he has in common with "White Jesus" is his long hair).

(More...)

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