Britney Spears

From CWCki
Revision as of 00:54, 3 January 2010 by VanKrause (talk | contribs)
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Spears, a'la Officer Nasty.

Britney Spears is an American "singer", whore, and favorite "music star" of Christian Weston Chandler.[1] Her personal levels of fail almost match his own and, much like Chris, has a tendency of making a complete jackass of herself by appearing in unflattering photos.

When playing a game of Pokémon with Lucas, Chris sang along to Britney songs the entire time.[2]

After Sarah Nicole Hammer grew up and became hot, Chris labeled her a "spittin' image of Britney Spears,"[3] but only because she was blonde. Because we all know how good Chris is with facial recognition.

Britney and Chris's sexuality

It is unlikely that Chris is a fan of her solely because of her music. He uses her as a method of proving his heterosexuality, as seen in this video. On 10 June 2009, Chris once again relied on Britney Spears to prove his "straightness" by favoriting several of her music videos on his account, which was promptly hacked and replaced with gay propaganda videos. It is not confirmed if this really is Chris, but it probably is.

The entire process of Chris using Britney to prove his Straightness is very ironic, as Britney Spears is a praised icon for Homos, as proven by Chris Crocker.

Britney and Chris's past

Another possibility why Chris obsesses over Britney is because she was extremely popular in America during the '90s, when Chris was growing up. He might be fond of her "music" simply for the nostalgia factor. His interest in her most likely started because all of his friends were girls and all girls back then loved Britney. This would give Chris the opportunity to be "one of the girls".

Tributes

For the record, Britney's marriage only lasted 12 hours.

Chris performed a cover of Britney's popular 1999 hit "Crazy" called "Feel So Lonesome". In a similar fashion to "So Need a Cute Girl", it consists mostly of Chris whining about being a virgin with rage, and that girls won't go out with him because they are already taken.

Near the end of the Captain's Log, Stardate September 13th, 2008 video, Chris's cellphone rings with a "Crazy" ringtone.

When it came time to do Round 3 of the SingStar Challenge, Chris chose to "sing" over her non-hit "Autumn Goodbye."

He also played "Heaven on Earth," on his failure of what he considers "radio".

In his ultimate, irrefutable proof that he is STRAIGHT (and completely \m/ metal \m/), Chris put a portrait of Britney on the wall, labelled simply "Oops!" (in reference to "Oops!... I Did It Again").

References