Difference between revisions of "Jack Thaddeus Phone Call"

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(Uploaded the final third of the transcript)
m (I had forgotten before to make Jack's name at the start of dialogue to be bold.)
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[''starting at 11:00'']
[''starting at 11:00'']


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Vivian is... gonna be pissed, and, you know....  I'm just saying.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Vivian is... gonna be pissed, and, you know....  I'm just saying.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright, well, my bad.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright, well, my bad.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Anyways... I want you to... stop rejecting... mail that you don't like.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Anyways... I want you to... stop rejecting... mail that you don't like.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: You—these are your fans, Chris; you shouldn't be fucking pushing them around like this... and actin' like, ya know, just because they say something that you don't agree with, their... opinions suddenly don't matter.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': You—these are your fans, Chris; you shouldn't be fucking pushing them around like this... and actin' like, ya know, just because they say something that you don't agree with, their... opinions suddenly don't matter.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: You know, so....  Vivian is trying to help you, but you don't—you seem to have a problem with taking advice.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': You know, so....  Vivian is trying to help you, but you don't—you seem to have a problem with taking advice.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I have been taking advice—the advice of Vivian.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I have been taking advice—the advice of Vivian.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: No, you haven't. [''interruption battle ensues''] You've been—you've been—okay, here's your version of—
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': No, you haven't. [''interruption battle ensues''] You've been—you've been—okay, here's your version of—


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' O—okay, well I—okay, well, I need to dispell—I need to—
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' O—okay, well I—okay, well, I need to dispell—I need to—


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: '''Chris'''!
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': '''Chris'''!


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' [''interrupts quietly''] Okay.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' [''interrupts quietly''] Okay.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: What have I told you about interrupting?!
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': What have I told you about interrupting?!


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright, well, I was—I wa—I was sayin' somethin', then, uhh, you started sayin' somethin', so, okay....  Continue.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright, well, I was—I wa—I was sayin' somethin', then, uhh, you started sayin' somethin', so, okay....  Continue.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Trials and advertisements make... you—trials and adversities make stronger; take your problems head-on; do not fucking dodge them.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Trials and advertisements make... you—trials and adversities make stronger; take your problems head-on; do not fucking dodge them.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: I just read that... from a fortune cookie.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': I just read that... from a fortune cookie.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Except I added the "fucking" part, because—
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Except I added the "fucking" part, because—


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Chinese people don't curse a lot.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Chinese people don't curse a lot.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Actually, they do, but... I don't know.  They—they curse in Chinese... something.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Actually, they do, but... I don't know.  They—they curse in Chinese... something.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah.  Okay.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah.  Okay.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: How much do you care about Sonichu? [''disgruntled noise of frustration''] Okay!  Now I am pissed, Chris, because I know what you're doing; you're just—you're not even listening!  There's more—
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': How much do you care about Sonichu? [''disgruntled noise of frustration''] Okay!  Now I am pissed, Chris, because I know what you're doing; you're just—you're not even listening!  There's more—


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I am listening to you.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I am listening to you.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: No, you're just saying, "Uh-huh.  Yeah.  Uhm-hmm.  Yeah."  You—...I've heard you do this before.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': No, you're just saying, "Uh-huh.  Yeah.  Uhm-hmm.  Yeah."  You—...I've heard you do this before.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Well, I ''have'' been listening to you.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Well, I ''have'' been listening to you.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Hi(?), I remember when you did this with ''Clyde''.  You just sit there and just, like, go, "Uhm-hmm.  Uhm-hmm.  Yeah.  Yeah.  Hmm.  Yeah.  Mm."  Do I do a good impression of you?  I think I do.  I'm—I think it's pretty spot-on.  So....
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Hi(?), I remember when you did this with ''Clyde''.  You just sit there and just, like, go, "Uhm-hmm.  Uhm-hmm.  Yeah.  Yeah.  Hmm.  Yeah.  Mm."  Do I do a good impression of you?  I think I do.  I'm—I think it's pretty spot-on.  So....


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Whatever.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Whatever.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: 'Member when—that's not a fuckin' respo-nse!
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': 'Member when—that's not a fuckin' respo-nse!


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' That did go on (?).
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' That did go on (?).


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Okay.  He—remember when he tried to get you to go to Redmond... and you didn't go?
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Okay.  He—remember when he tried to get you to go to Redmond... and you didn't go?


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Right.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Right.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: You didn't go, because you don't give a ''shit'' about Sonichu.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': You didn't go, because you don't give a ''shit'' about Sonichu.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' No, I didn't go, because I thought it was a trap.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' No, I didn't go, because I thought it was a trap.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: How could it be a trap?  For what?
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': How could it be a trap?  For what?


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Well—
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Well—


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Do you think Clyde would—
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Do you think Clyde would—


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' My mom thought it wa—my mom thought it was a trap.  My dad thought it was a trap.   
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' My mom thought it wa—my mom thought it was a trap.  My dad thought it was a trap.   


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: No, you thought it was a trap!
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': No, you thought it was a trap!


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And th—
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And th—


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Mom and Dad don't give a shit about what you do with Sonichu!
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Mom and Dad don't give a shit about what you do with Sonichu!


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And then we realized that the—that the e-mails from Mr. Mayamoto came from Mail.com, which is where anybody could pretend to be somebody else.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And then we realized that the—that the e-mails from Mr. Mayamoto came from Mail.com, which is where anybody could pretend to be somebody else.
Line 100: Line 100:
<font color="#000000">[''at this point, Jack basks in the silence of the rare occurence of having been owned by Chris'']
<font color="#000000">[''at this point, Jack basks in the silence of the rare occurence of having been owned by Chris'']


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Eh....  Well... Miyamoto—
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Eh....  Well... Miyamoto—


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Of course, you know, my family is concerned of my safety, so there you go.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Of course, you know, my family is concerned of my safety, so there you go.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Yeah, that's why they shelter you like you're a baby.  You know what?  My parents threw me out when I turned eighteen.  You know ''why'' they threw me out?
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Yeah, that's why they shelter you like you're a baby.  You know what?  My parents threw me out when I turned eighteen.  You know ''why'' they threw me out?


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hmm... probably because they couldn't stand you?</font>
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hmm... probably because they couldn't stand you?</font>
Line 110: Line 110:
<font color="#000000">[''Chris is now officially on a roll'']
<font color="#000000">[''Chris is now officially on a roll'']


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Oooh!  That earns you... two more gay ads!  ...You little sassy—
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Oooh!  That earns you... two more gay ads!  ...You little sassy—


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: thingy... guy.  You gonna apologize?
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': thingy... guy.  You gonna apologize?


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I'm apologizing.  I apologize for that.  Okay, I—
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I'm apologizing.  I apologize for that.  Okay, I—


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: No, say, "I'm sorry."  Hey, "I am sorry."
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': No, say, "I'm sorry."  Hey, "I am sorry."


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I'm sorry.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I'm sorry.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Well... they kicked me out because I—because, you know... I have like five other brothers, or something.  I don't know.  I have a lot of... people in house.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Well... they kicked me out because I—because, you know... I have like five other brothers, or something.  I don't know.  I have a lot of... people in house.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.  So it was overcrowded.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.  So it was overcrowded.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Yes.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Yes.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Just like your house, except it's not full of people; it's full of shit that you don't need!  HAHAHAHAHA!  Ahhh... we have fun, don't we, Chris?
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Just like your house, except it's not full of people; it's full of shit that you don't need!  HAHAHAHAHA!  Ahhh... we have fun, don't we, Chris?


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hmm....  Well, you are, anyway.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hmm....  Well, you are, anyway.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Yeah.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Yeah.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And I am not going to interrupt.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And I am not going to interrupt.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Anyways... grow some balls, get some initiative, ''fucking'' promote the shit out of Sonichu....
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Anyways... grow some balls, get some initiative, ''fucking'' promote the shit out of Sonichu....


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: ...Vivian's gonna rape me... with the... strap-on, because she's crazy—oh, wait, I was reading an e-mail.  Umm... yeah.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': ...Vivian's gonna rape me... with the... strap-on, because she's crazy—oh, wait, I was reading an e-mail.  Umm... yeah.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Just do whatever Vivian says, and... I'll be calling you soon, and... you don't fucking abuse your fans.  Like, they're, you know—you don't have a lot of them, Chris!
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Just do whatever Vivian says, and... I'll be calling you soon, and... you don't fucking abuse your fans.  Like, they're, you know—you don't have a lot of them, Chris!


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Also, go to Redmond.  Because, you know—
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Also, go to Redmond.  Because, you know—


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Eventually, I—eventually, I will.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Eventually, I—eventually, I will.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Yeah.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Yeah.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Yeah, I—so....  Oh, also—also, don't piss of your Asperger friends, 'cuz, you know, they're fuckin'... crazy-ass niggers.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Yeah, I—so....  Oh, also—also, don't piss of your Asperger friends, 'cuz, you know, they're fuckin'... crazy-ass niggers.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Yeah.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Yeah.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright.  So... any other thoughts?
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright.  So... any other thoughts?


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Alright.  Uhh... you're fat.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Alright.  Uhh... you're fat.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oka—oka—okay, I guess we're done here...?
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oka—oka—okay, I guess we're done here...?


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Yep.  Bye-bye.
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Yep.  Bye-bye.


<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay, take care.  Merry Christmas.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay, take care.  Merry Christmas.


<font color="#04B45F">Jack: Merry Christmas to you, Fatty Fatfat!
<font color="#04B45F">'''Jack''': Merry Christmas to you, Fatty Fatfat!
<font color="#000000">
<font color="#000000">



Revision as of 17:56, 6 December 2009

Take your problems head on. Do not fucking dodge them. I just read that from a fortune cookie. Except I added the fucking part because Chinese people don't curse a lot.
Jack Thaddeus

In December 2009, Jack Thaddeus called Chris, to discuss the recent events involving Chris's statements about Asperger, Sonichu 9 and his Parkay.

Most of the call, Jack reprimands Chris and tells him he has a problem with making his comics, his health and his mailbag.

Transcript

[starting at 11:00]

Jack: Vivian is... gonna be pissed, and, you know.... I'm just saying.

Chris: Alright, well, my bad.

Jack: Anyways... I want you to... stop rejecting... mail that you don't like.

Chris: Okay.

Jack: You—these are your fans, Chris; you shouldn't be fucking pushing them around like this... and actin' like, ya know, just because they say something that you don't agree with, their... opinions suddenly don't matter.

Chris: Okay.

Jack: You know, so.... Vivian is trying to help you, but you don't—you seem to have a problem with taking advice.

Chris: I have been taking advice—the advice of Vivian.

Jack: No, you haven't. [interruption battle ensues] You've been—you've been—okay, here's your version of—

Chris: O—okay, well I—okay, well, I need to dispell—I need to—

Jack: Chris!

Chris: [interrupts quietly] Okay.

Jack: What have I told you about interrupting?!

Chris: Alright, well, I was—I wa—I was sayin' somethin', then, uhh, you started sayin' somethin', so, okay.... Continue.

Jack: Trials and advertisements make... you—trials and adversities make stronger; take your problems head-on; do not fucking dodge them.

Chris: Okay.

Jack: I just read that... from a fortune cookie.

Chris: Okay.

Jack: Except I added the "fucking" part, because—

Chris: Okay.

Jack: Chinese people don't curse a lot.

Chris: Alright.

Jack: Actually, they do, but... I don't know. They—they curse in Chinese... something.

Chris: Yeah. Okay.

Jack: How much do you care about Sonichu? [disgruntled noise of frustration] Okay! Now I am pissed, Chris, because I know what you're doing; you're just—you're not even listening! There's more—

Chris: I am listening to you.

Jack: No, you're just saying, "Uh-huh. Yeah. Uhm-hmm. Yeah." You—...I've heard you do this before.

Chris: Well, I have been listening to you.

Jack: Hi(?), I remember when you did this with Clyde. You just sit there and just, like, go, "Uhm-hmm. Uhm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Hmm. Yeah. Mm." Do I do a good impression of you? I think I do. I'm—I think it's pretty spot-on. So....

Chris: Whatever.

Jack: 'Member when—that's not a fuckin' respo-nse!

Chris: That did go on (?).

Jack: Okay. He—remember when he tried to get you to go to Redmond... and you didn't go?

Chris: Right.

Jack: You didn't go, because you don't give a shit about Sonichu.

Chris: No, I didn't go, because I thought it was a trap.

Jack: How could it be a trap? For what?

Chris: Well—

Jack: Do you think Clyde would—

Chris: My mom thought it wa—my mom thought it was a trap. My dad thought it was a trap.

Jack: No, you thought it was a trap!

Chris: And th—

Jack: Mom and Dad don't give a shit about what you do with Sonichu!

Chris: And then we realized that the—that the e-mails from Mr. Mayamoto came from Mail.com, which is where anybody could pretend to be somebody else.

[at this point, Jack basks in the silence of the rare occurence of having been owned by Chris]

Jack: Eh.... Well... Miyamoto—

Chris: Of course, you know, my family is concerned of my safety, so there you go.

Jack: Yeah, that's why they shelter you like you're a baby. You know what? My parents threw me out when I turned eighteen. You know why they threw me out?

Chris: Hmm... probably because they couldn't stand you?

[Chris is now officially on a roll]

Jack: Oooh! That earns you... two more gay ads! ...You little sassy—

Chris: Okay.

Jack: thingy... guy. You gonna apologize?

Chris: Yeah, I'm apologizing. I apologize for that. Okay, I—

Jack: No, say, "I'm sorry." Hey, "I am sorry."

Chris: I'm sorry.

Jack: Well... they kicked me out because I—because, you know... I have like five other brothers, or something. I don't know. I have a lot of... people in house.

Chris: Okay. So it was overcrowded.

Jack: Yes.

Chris: Okay.

Jack: Just like your house, except it's not full of people; it's full of shit that you don't need! HAHAHAHAHA! Ahhh... we have fun, don't we, Chris?

Chris: Hmm.... Well, you are, anyway.

Jack: Yeah.

Chris: And I am not going to interrupt.

Jack: Anyways... grow some balls, get some initiative, fucking promote the shit out of Sonichu....

Chris: Okay.

Jack: ...Vivian's gonna rape me... with the... strap-on, because she's crazy—oh, wait, I was reading an e-mail. Umm... yeah.

Chris: Alright.

Jack: Just do whatever Vivian says, and... I'll be calling you soon, and... you don't fucking abuse your fans. Like, they're, you know—you don't have a lot of them, Chris!

Chris: Yeah.

Jack: Also, go to Redmond. Because, you know—

Chris: Eventually, I—eventually, I will.

Jack: Yeah.

Chris: Alright.

Jack: Yeah, I—so.... Oh, also—also, don't piss of your Asperger friends, 'cuz, you know, they're fuckin'... crazy-ass niggers.

Chris: Okay.

Jack: Yeah.

Chris: Alright. So... any other thoughts?

Jack: Alright. Uhh... you're fat.

Chris: Oka—oka—okay, I guess we're done here...?

Jack: Yep. Bye-bye.

Chris: Okay, take care. Merry Christmas.

Jack: Merry Christmas to you, Fatty Fatfat!

See also

External links