To Cole Smithey, from Barb, and Sonichu (Prime)

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To Cole Smithey, from Barb, and Sonichu (Prime) is a video Chris uploaded on 30 September 2020. It features an address by Barbara to Cole Smithey, after Cole apparently sent Barb flowers for her 79th birthday. (Of course, it's probable that this was a ween sending flowers in Cole's name.) Chris temporarily forgets that he's possessed by Sonichu, but makes a quick course-correction before rambling to Cole about the Dimensional Merge, and the apparent closeness of various superheroes to Cole. (This reflects his early posts about C-197, which is populated by "EVERYONE who is “Fictional”... like Iron Man and the Avengers in New York.")[1]

Video

To Cole Smithey, from Barb, and Sonichu (Prime)
Stardate 30 September 2020
Subject Matter OtherUnknownIcon.png Cole Smithey
Performance Style ReasonReason Reason, CrazyCrazy Crazy
Shirt A Sonichu and Rosechu Valentine
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Description

Feel free to text me, Cole. I’ll be here with Mama’s phone.

Transcript

[The video opens on Barb holding the bouquet of flowers. Music can be heard in the background]

Barb: Hi, Cole. Thanks for the flowers. They're beautiful. That was very sweet of you. I'm–I remember... all the, uh, cards and letters, that you mail me, when you were in college. I still have 'em, and I still r–read 'em. It's so nice... the–to be reminded, of your love... and support. Thank you very much. I love you.

Chris: Hm. Very nice. Very nice.

[Chris moves the camera to face himself as he gets up and moves back into his room]

Hey Cole! Got a little message for you myself! Brother, this is actually Sonichu, yeah, the one and only prime of the Sonichu species from our sister dimension that literally right next to you–Hey! You've been hanging out next to Iron Man, literally. You've been hanging out with Iron Man and the Avengers and some of the DC heroes and EVERYBODY. But aside from that, I gotta tell you Cole, all the stuff you pulled against Barb, over these years, and I've hear–I've heard about it through Mama's memory 'cause I not only swapped bodies wit–with... Mama–wi... Christine, like what, literally six months ago today, and... I just have so many, of my own shares of... things and whatnot that I can salways speak to yo–speak to you on her behalf, got my own problems here... [1:28 is unintelligible], yadda yadda yadda yadda and so forth [1:30 is unintelligible].

[sigh]... I don't have a script! I'm not going on script, but, Cole! I'll give you this props: at least you came through on doing this nice thing for Barb in her later years, right before we're actually going on with the Dimensional Merge, where you will literally be able to meet... Iron Man, but also, just the drive over t–just to drive over to Jersey and literally meet Batman, so... Have fun knowing that, Joseph Cole Smithey! And, uh... shoot... Sussana?[?] That's still a thing? And you know what, I'm gonna do what Mama did, like, you know like hey... Whoop-de-doo for him... 'cause... she did that, and I just... doin– felt like I wanted to do the–hey, you got married without inviting her and Barb, so there's that. Although I will say one thing on behalf of Mama, you were right about Barb on a number of things, and Mama was mistaken. Mama was mistaken, so... there's that. She's learned. Mama–Barbara yelled at Mama, so there's that, let you know about that. But that's a whole 'nother kale of fish. If you feel like you want to talk about this per–personally with–personally, feel free to call or text at, uh, pretty much the phone number that's been popularized all over the innernet.

All right. Anyway, all the way here in, Ruckersville, Virginia, in this Dimension 1218, originating from C-197, thanks Cole! Have a good day.

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References