Difference between revisions of "User:Dkaien/Sandbox"

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It's been some time since [[Chris]] has been able to even form a casual friendship with a woman. Nevertheless, his single-minded focus on getting laid at all costs has led him to view the concept of the '''friend zone''' with disgust. Friendship, in Chris's mind, is merely a tactic women use to avoid giving guys like him the [[china]] they deserve.
{{quote|I am prepared to repeat that hundred times from the bottom of my hurting heart.|Chris, to Megan Schroeder, 12 March 2008}}


==The friend zone defined==
[[Chris]] has a tendency to '''repeat himself'''. He's famous for the use and overuse of his many [[CWC-isms]], new words or short phrases that he's made a regular part of his vocabulary, but over the years, [[trolls]] have also discovered that Chris often uses and re-uses longer canned sentences and sentiments, changing them only a little or not at all.
Nowadays the notion of the "friend zone" is common in discussions of romantic relationships. From one perspective, the friend zone is where guys wind up when they spend too much time getting to know a woman without trying to make the risky move towards a more serious relationship. Eventually, the woman views them as "just friends" (or "like a brother," to use one variation on the theme) rather than a potential lover.


From another perspective, a woman might value her friendship with a man too much to take the risk of advancing to a more serious commitment, which could lead to an ugly breakup and the end of any sort of relationship with him.
Working out the whys and wherefores of this behavior is more of a job for a psychiatric professional, but it could be another symptom of his [[autism]]. Just as autistics often retreat into routine, repetitive physical behaviors, Chris may keep a catalog of routine verbal statements -- when he comes up with a statement that works in a given situation, it's easier and safer to repeat that later on rather than come up with something new.


It's possible for a woman to enjoy a man's company without wanting to go to bed with him (and for a man to likewise feel the same way about a woman). Most people are capable of accepting this fact, even if it's a bit difficult to deal with when one has been "friended" by the object of one's affection. Chris, of course, has other ideas.
==Examples==
*When complaining about [[Bob Chandler|his father]], Chris often says that Bob "starts more arguments than there are flies at a garbage dump." This comparison debuted in an [[IRC (03 January 2009)|IRC chat]] from 3 January 2009, appeared again in another chat about [[IRC (20 January 2009)|two weeks later]], popped up once more in [[Mumble 1]] on 31 January, made another appearance in [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]], and finally showed up some time later in the [[Father Call]].


==Chris on the friend zone==
*In the [[Surfshack Tito Emails]], Chris first called Tito a "God Damn Trollin' Stupid Nigger," then upgraded the insult in a later message to "trolling stupid, pickle-suited NIGGER." He repeated the latter insult in the [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]] video, where he again called Tito a "trollin' stupid pickle-suited nigger."
Like many other supposed "rules" related to sex and dating, the friend zone is in fact a pretty nebulous concept. Chris, unable to think about relationships except in the most [[Autism|rigid, inflexible terms]], characterizes the friend zone as a law, a hard and fast rule that he apparently believes has been forced upon him by some unspecified authority. (This is similar to his interpretation of the [[Third date|three-date rule]].)


In [[Mailbag 4]], a correspondent asked him what law he would change if he could change a single one. (His intention was probably to bait Chris into discussing the "dumb laws" preventing [[Zapina|teenage girls]] from taking off their clothes in public.) Chris responded with a tirade against the friend zone.
*During [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8]], Chris first complains about Alec "killing characters left and right" in [[Fan:Sonichu Revolution|Sonichu Revolution]], and uses a similar "killing left and right" phrase later in the conversation.


{{quote|I would remove the "Law" of the "Friend Zone", because I feel that it is just wrong to not even attempt to have anything beyond friendship, especially if the man and the woman are both comfortable with each other and are close.|Chris, failing to understand women as usual.}}
*After [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BlueSpike]] forced Chris to, among other things, announce that he was gay and that [[BILLY MAYS]] was the new mayor of CWCville, Chris walked back those statements on several occasions. When doing so, he seemed to make a point of saying that he was not just lying, but lying "out his ass," in his [[CWC Update 1 July 2009|1 July 2009 Captain's Log]], in the [[Chris-chan Discusses...]] interview, in the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|vibrator destruction video]], and in the [[Samantha Thaddeus E-mails]].


Later, he expanded his opinion somewhat in the [[Common_Questions#Answered_15_January_2010|Common Questions]] section of the Mailbag. In this case, a correspondent quite reasonably asked, "What happened to a woman's right to choose who she wants to be with?"
*When Chris wants to get a point across, he often tells the listener to "get it through your skull." This is usually embellished with insults and profanities, like "get it through your damn fucking skull" (in [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]) or "get that through your stupid skull" (in the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]]).


{{quote|Nothing has happened in Women's Rights; the "Friend Zone" is only the LOUSIEST EXCUSE EVER to give to someone the woman deeply cares about and trusts so she could get out of sex or a relationship. I do not take kindly to that Excuse at this time.|Chris, as delusional and entitled as ever.}}
*In [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]], Chris characterizes homosexuals as those who "stray away from the straight path." A similar construction appears in his e-mails with Megan Schroeder, where he talks about his fear of "falling off the straight path."
 
Chris's characterization of "we're just friends" as an "excuse" is revealing, both in regards to his ideas about women and his view of  himself. He cannot imagine a rational explanation for why a female friend would not want to have sex with him. Instead, he believes that women have invented excuses like this one because for some reason they fear a sexual relationship. If he is attracted to her and wants to sleep with her, he feels that she is obligated to return his interest and help bring his degenerate fantasies to life.
 
==Megan and the friend zone==
His comments about the friend zone shed a bit more light on Chris's relationship with [[Megan Schroeder]] (and its spectacular collapse). While Megan was happy to enjoy an ordinary, platonic friendship with Chris - which, most observers would agree, is far more than he could ever have reasonably hoped for - he clearly couldn't get his mind around the notion of a woman who didn't mind his company, but didn't want to have sex with him. From his perspective, she was "making excuses," since there's no way she could have been sincerely interested in nothing more than a good friendship. Hence his refusal to quit subjecting her to physical pressure, his assumption that only sexual inexperience prevented her from wanting to fuck him, and so on.
 
==See also==
* [[Chris and sex]]
* [[Megan Schroeder]]
* [[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up]]

Latest revision as of 12:59, 12 April 2010

“ I am prepared to repeat that hundred times from the bottom of my hurting heart. ”
Chris, to Megan Schroeder, 12 March 2008

Chris has a tendency to repeat himself. He's famous for the use and overuse of his many CWC-isms, new words or short phrases that he's made a regular part of his vocabulary, but over the years, trolls have also discovered that Chris often uses and re-uses longer canned sentences and sentiments, changing them only a little or not at all.

Working out the whys and wherefores of this behavior is more of a job for a psychiatric professional, but it could be another symptom of his autism. Just as autistics often retreat into routine, repetitive physical behaviors, Chris may keep a catalog of routine verbal statements -- when he comes up with a statement that works in a given situation, it's easier and safer to repeat that later on rather than come up with something new.

Examples

  • When complaining about his father, Chris often says that Bob "starts more arguments than there are flies at a garbage dump." This comparison debuted in an IRC chat from 3 January 2009, appeared again in another chat about two weeks later, popped up once more in Mumble 1 on 31 January, made another appearance in BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5, and finally showed up some time later in the Father Call.
  • In the Surfshack Tito Emails, Chris first called Tito a "God Damn Trollin' Stupid Nigger," then upgraded the insult in a later message to "trolling stupid, pickle-suited NIGGER." He repeated the latter insult in the Chris Drops the N-Bomb video, where he again called Tito a "trollin' stupid pickle-suited nigger."
  • When Chris wants to get a point across, he often tells the listener to "get it through your skull." This is usually embellished with insults and profanities, like "get it through your damn fucking skull" (in CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!) or "get that through your stupid skull" (in the Kacey and Liquid Call).
  • In Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE, Chris characterizes homosexuals as those who "stray away from the straight path." A similar construction appears in his e-mails with Megan Schroeder, where he talks about his fear of "falling off the straight path."
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