Liquid Chris

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Revision as of 19:36, 12 August 2009 by VanKrause (talk | contribs) (→‎Transcript: Finished the transcription)
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The imposter Chris stole his famous lecture to the Jerkops from the real Chris

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CChanSonichuCWC (aka The impostor in the brown stripes aka Liquid Chris, erroneously "Jeff") (born 24 February 1982) is the TRUE and HONEST Christian Weston Chandler (ORIGINAL IDENTITY - DO NOT STEAL) and creator of the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, Sonichu. His artwork and comics are extremely popular and he often attracts many females with his medallions and his Guitar of Win. He makes mad Cash by selling said medallions at Otakon. CChanSonichuCWC has also been elected the mayor of CWCville after Jimmy Hill dropped out of the upcoming CWCville elections due to health problems. Since taking over as mayor of CWCville, CChanSonichuCWC has begun a wave of progressive reform movements including universal health care, expansion of labor unions, replanting the once lush forest of cwcville, investing in alternative fuel sources, improving overall health and education and most controversially, lifting the ban of Homosexuals and African-American Peoples from CWCville.

Theories

KNOW THE DIFFERENCE

There are several theories why there are two Christian Weston Chandlers who both claim to be the creator of the Sonichu series, and why one Chris-chan seems to be better than another. Some of these theories include:

  • The Ian Brandon Anderson hypothesis - the so called "Real" Chris who goes by IBAChandler on YouTube is really an impostor named Ian Brandon Anderson (hence IBA) who is a professional troll dedicated to impersonating Chris.
  • The fact Chris calls himself a "gaybian" seems to suggest that Chris actually was saying he wasn't a "gay lesbian" but was saying "gay-be-ian" as in "Gay be Ian."
  • Government experiment - some argue that Liquid and Solid Chris were a result of a government experiment, similar to the popular comedy movie Twins where Liquid was created to be an ubermensch (though cherry cola may have caused some of the defects such as idiosyncratic behavior) while Solid inherited all the recessive genes.
  • Alternate timeline - some argue that Liquid Chris is from an alternate timeline where Chris was not coddled by his parents and he managed to do something with his life.
  • Parallel dimension - similar to the alternate timeline argument, some suggest that Liquid Chris comes from a parallel dimension where his parents were not coddled and a dimension where copyright laws as we know do not exist and combination of characters are created as works of pure genius.

Drama with Chris

Cest n'est pas une Chris

In all seriousness, though, CWC has further demonstrated his total inability to understand satire and parody. Recently, two videos vehemently defending his claim that he is the original creator of Sonichu (Whoop-de-fucking-doo). CChanSonichuCWC has fired back with much more coherent, well-made videos, gathering him a cult of fans on Youtube.

Behold.

On July 26th, 2009, Chris posted the following on one of CChanSonichu's videos:

The Final Showdown

Hey, DUMBASS! YOU WISH YOU WERE ME! I would say YOU are Stuck... IN MINUS-SECOND-GEAR!

I am Calling YOU OUT!

14 Branchland Ct. Ruckersville, VA BEFORE August 2, 2009. If you really WANT to be me, then Come Face Me.

oh, BTW, YOUR NASAL VOICE IS MORE GRATING THAN THE WORD "NAIVE", and METAL NAILS ON THE CHALKBOARD.

But "Naive" is even WORSE than NAILS.

You are a Nerd and a Whimp!

Have a good day.
Christopher Christian Weston Chandler

Irony

If you look hard, you can see the TRUE, HONEST Sonichu medallion.

Chris has mocked the CChanSonichuCWC on several points:

It's a bad sign when you're fighting a mirror, and the mirror is winning.

In early August 2009[citation needed], Chris started to believe that Liquid can't be the real Chris because only the real Christian Weston Chandler is a retard who is the laughing stock of the Internet. Therefore, the fact that Liquid isn't trolled and doesn't do dumb shit suggests that he isn't the real Chris. Of course, previously mentioned theories seem to disprove this belief.

Challenges

ALL THE LADIES (and trolls pretending to be ladies) LOVE LIQUID!

CChanSonichuCWC has been challenged by CWC on 2 different occasions. The first time Chris challenged him in spanish to respond to his video in spanish as well since the real CWC can speak spanish in this video. CChanSonichuCWC did so not only in Spanish but also French, German and Japanese here . The second time Chris challenged him to a karaoke competition which as of writing is ongoing.

Showdown

Chris has a telephone interchange with CChanSonichuCWC where he threatens to arrest him for identity theft and involve Bob in this debacle.

Transcript

IBA: Hello?

CWC: Hello Ian. Yeah I think you know who this is.

IBA: Look Christian, stop this.

CWC: Look, you are giving me a lot of stress right now and I am not going to handle it. IBA: (sighs) Look, Chris, listen, I was kind enough to accept the fact that you are actually a Christian W. Chandler, but you were…

CWC: No! My name, my name is Christian Weston Chandler

IBA: All right fine, your name is Christian Weston Chandler. But the fact is you were born with that name, you are not the Christian Weston Chandler that was born as Christopher Weston Chandler, who’s the original creator of Sonichu and Rosechu

CWC: No, no, no IBA: I’ve asked you nicely to please stop pretending, for the sake of Kacey. She really cares about you.

CWC: I am not pretending anything. And you need to stop slandering me with your lies on the YouTube.

IBA: Look, I don’t know what the heck is wrong with your head. But you know and I know, my parents know, Kacey knows, the whole world knows that you are not Christopher Christian Ricardo Weston Chandler.

CWC: Hold on stop that slandering against me, because I don’t think that’s very true. Because my fan base, if you took a look at my YouTube, you take a look at my YouTube video, you see that my fanbase has left me comments of support. And I’ve taken a look at your YouTube video and you and I see that they are all calling you out.

IBA: Look, Chris please, don’t do this. You’re breaking my balls here. Stop doing this. Stop playing this game. Quite pretending. Please come clean. Stop it.

CWC: Mmmm. You are really ticking me off right now. Mmm.

IBA: Look, we’re both ticking each other off, but lets…

CWC: You keep making up all these things I mean whatever, you know, AND right now, you’re making that up right now.

IBA: Making what up?

CWC: You're just making that up off the top of your head, because your name is not Christian Weston Chandler, it is Ian Brandon Anderson, and you are grinding my gears.

IBA: No, no, listen, I'll spell it out for you; I came up with I - B - A-Chandler as in I being myself, B as in specifying what I am, A as in singular, and Chandler being my last name. There is no such thing as Ian Brandon Anderson.

CWC: No, because I found it out, your Ian Brandon Anderson name, the reason you a... you added Chandler to that is because you were paying tribute to the serial killer Oba Chandler

(Ian and his parents talk in the background)

IBA: Are you still there?

CWC: Yeah, I'm still here, what do you want to talk about?

(Ian and his parents talk in the background more)

IBA (background): I'm not going to let this go, he's *inaudible* around with me in real life.

(Bob talks in the background)

IBA (background): He's continuing to call me this Ian Brandon Anderson that somebody made up.

(Bob talks in the background some more)

IBA: Look, Chris, stop it, stop this game, you know...

CWC: I am not playing a game, I have... I have not... I have been... I have been being true and honest this entire time, and you have been playing a dirty game.

IBA: Look, stop... No, no, no, no, I am not playing a game, I am being the true... I am true honest voice of reason here, I am the true honest one here. I am the original true creator of Sonichu and Rosechu and the world of CWCVille (gets cut off)

CWC: No, no, no, that was me.

IBA: You're just... No, no, no, no. (gets cut off by CWC) You have never been to Manchester High School, you have never been to Piedmont Virginia Community College, you are taking the same class as Kacey is, over at community college in Washington DC.

CWC: No I am not, I don't even live in the Washington DC.

IBA: You are in DC, I know it, she knows it, we all know it, now stop it, if you don't (gets cut off by CWC) If you don't (gets cut off again) If you do not come clean right now, I am going to get my father in on this further, and you are going to get fucking arrested, thrown in jail, and you will not get to live the peaceful, happy life that Kacey and I would like (voice cracks) you to live because Kacey really cares for you MAN!

CWC: That's not true, I am Honour roll! I am honour roll, and you... you have just been... (trademark groan) And you know what? How would you... when would you even, you know, you keep making all these threats with the police and (gets cut off)

IBA: I am not making any threats (gets cut off), everything I tell you is true, honest, and legit, you are the one (gets cut off)

CWC: No, you are being, you were being, you are not being true and you are not being honest.

IBA: Ok, this is it. I have gave you the last warning, I gave you the last response, you just busting my balls again, you're going to jail, I'm sorry Kacey.

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