Difference between revisions of "Template:Article of the now"

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The '''monthly tugboat''' is [[Chris]]'s [[CWC-isms|euphemism]] for his {{w|Social Security Disability Insurance}} (SSDI) payment, which is deposited into his bank account via direct deposit on or about the 3rd of each month. SSDI is part of a U.S. taxpayer-supported program to support financially those whose physical injures or [[Slow-in-the-minds|mental ailments]] prevent them from performing even minimum-wage work. Chris is known to have belonged to this system since at least [[2007]], before he was [[Chris in the media#Something Awful|discovered]] by the [[Chris and the Internet|Internet]].
In [[October 2016]], Chris visited some of the stores at which he is banned and asked the management to sign a contract to unban him. The documents were leaked to [[Kiwi Farms]] on 13 October.


Contrary to popular belief, Chris's check is not need-based, but is awarded on eligibility alone. Most US Americans have to work a decade to qualify. Chris, on the other hand, has only been employed for six months (three at [[Wendy's]], three in a [[Cutco|pyramid scheme]]). However, [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] earned retirement insurance in his years at General Electric, and Social Security also lets retirees' dependent disabled children get payments, even if they have never worked themselves, so long as they were disabled before turning 22. As long as Chris earns less than $1220 a month, and stays unmarried and [[Chris and the law|out of prison]], he will continue to receive his monthly tugboat unimpeded.
Chris's attitude to bans appears to have remained the same [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|as his reaction]] to his ban from the [[GAMe PLACe]] nearly a decade earlier, using ridiculous [[negotiation]] tactics to tackle bans that he just cannot get over. These documents are also a big example of his [[Chris and his Ego|egotistical nature]] and [[Sonic Boom Protests|deteriorating]] [[Un-clit 2.0|sense]] [[Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis|of]] [[Chris and reality|reality]] post-[[Tomgirl]], believing that businesses (that'll be better without his patronage) will sign a legal document that will unban him and prevent them from being able to call the [[JERKOPS|police]] against him (which is illegal since contracts cannot be used to protect from [[Chris and the Law|criminal prosecution]], thus making it null and void), all because a violent, egotistical lolcow believes that not signing would prove that they are "most uncompassionate and lacking of heart and soul of any person", and are a bunch of "unwelcoming immature rat -a**" b*****", comparing them to [[Pmurt|Donald Trump]]. He also believes that the reasons that he was banned are now "outdated" (similar to how he tried to convince [[Michael Snyder]] that he needs to "[[Chris and remorse|forgive]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|and]] [[Megan|forget]]"), and that the [[Chris in the media#New York Magazine|"Human Rights Campaign"]] would be on his side since he's now a "[[Tomgirl Saga|"L"esbian "T"ranswoman]]", the L and T from LGBTQ.


('''[[Monthly Tugboat|More...]]''')
('''[[Unban contracts|More...]]''')

Latest revision as of 13:22, 13 November 2024

CWCLuther2 - credit to Here to Lurk.png

In October 2016, Chris visited some of the stores at which he is banned and asked the management to sign a contract to unban him. The documents were leaked to Kiwi Farms on 13 October.

Chris's attitude to bans appears to have remained the same as his reaction to his ban from the GAMe PLACe nearly a decade earlier, using ridiculous negotiation tactics to tackle bans that he just cannot get over. These documents are also a big example of his egotistical nature and deteriorating sense of reality post-Tomgirl, believing that businesses (that'll be better without his patronage) will sign a legal document that will unban him and prevent them from being able to call the police against him (which is illegal since contracts cannot be used to protect from criminal prosecution, thus making it null and void), all because a violent, egotistical lolcow believes that not signing would prove that they are "most uncompassionate and lacking of heart and soul of any person", and are a bunch of "unwelcoming immature rat -a**" b*****", comparing them to Donald Trump. He also believes that the reasons that he was banned are now "outdated" (similar to how he tried to convince Michael Snyder that he needs to "forgive and forget"), and that the "Human Rights Campaign" would be on his side since he's now a ""L"esbian "T"ranswoman", the L and T from LGBTQ.

(More...)

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