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The fuck that shit be??
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”
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| Lars, questioning on what autism is
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The Lars Call is a ninety-minute phone conversation where Chris discusses with Jackie's ex-boyfriend Lars addictions, a parade he promised Jackie, what he would do for a woman, and boats. Chris gets comfortable with ebonics, and hilarity ensues.
Summary
- Jackie had an involuntary abortion thanks to Lars
- Lars getting rid of his boats, Chris gets rid of his Legos
- Lars didn't finish school because people played Kick the Nigga
- Lars doesn't understand autism, after Chris's explanation, he thought it was Asperger's and Down Syndrome
- Chris whines about trolls, not getting a job, and being called a homo. Lars hears him
- Chris doesn't like when people say "gay" as in stupid, Lars doesn't like when people say "nigga" out of context
- Sonichu (didn't see that coming), Chris incorporates IRL enemies. Lars tells him to continue the comic in order to conquer the trolls
- Lars says Jackie is upset because she isn't an inspiration for Chris to do the comic, and he sometimes doesn't do what he tells her he will.
- Chris tells Lars he's a virgin, Lars says that explains his rage against the trolls.
- Chris rewrites the comic so he doesn't kill "Alec Benson Nigga"
- Jackie better not burn that casserole.
- Chris promised a parade for Alec to Jackie, Chris denies it, Lars has the e-mail proving he did.
- Jackie initially broke up with Lars because he told her he'd lose the boats, and he didn't. Chris feels him. Chris is Lars's Nigga
- Chris is willing to give up the Moon and Mercury if he had it, for Jackie. He's really giving up video games, but he won't sell his "PS Triple"
- Lars spent $35,000 on six credit cards for boats. He won't let addiction rule his life anymore
- Chris swears on the grave on his Aunt Corina he will not spend anymore on his PS3 (at least it wasn't Patti)
- Lars spent 9 months as a volunteer at a hospital enjoying the sight of old white men dying
- More bitching about trolls.
- Lars and Chris talk about their criminal records, Lars makes trespassing sound bad ass
- Chris apparently turns into a nigga himself as about halfway in and speaks in Ebonics (off and on) the remainder of the call
- Chris would shoot Michael Snyder if he had the chance. Michael was just looking for a reason to ban Chris
- Lars gives Chris a scenario of someone breaking in. Chris says he's strong and would kick their ass (only if they hit first)
- Chris likes Black people on TV. Lars gets mildly offended upon hearing how Chris likes "Sanford & Son". They both hold up their fists in solidarity.
- The conversation goes back to Jackie, they wonder why Jackie is mad at Chris.
- Chris claims that he will make things right
- Lars burned his boats because he wants Jackie back and suggested that Chris burn his PS3 to get Jackie back.
- Lars thinks he has the upper hand over Chris in the competition over Jackie. He was known as "Ram-rod" in High School
- Chris talks about his Cherokee heritage. He's not a "casino nigga" He beats the stereotype that Native Americans have jobs.
- Lars respects Chris trying to win Jackie back, while Lars is "ramrodding" her
- Chris talks about destroying his first PS3, Lars questions why he got a second one. Chris says he needs it as a computer. Lars asks why he didn't get a computer instead
- Lars tells Chris to improve himself whether Jackie stays with him or not.
- Jackie can't come to the phone, she's taking a massive shit courtesy of Taco Bell
- Chris whines that making changes is too hard.
- Lars says Chris is afraid of women, Chris denies it
- Chris didn't have Taco Bell, he had a fish fillet for dinner.
- Lars lost his virginity at 10, he was scared.
- Lars tells Chris if he loses the PSTriple, his ass will be kicked out on the street and Jackie will be at Chris' doorstep the following day
- Lars concludes with the fist of solidarity, He will bang Jackie when she gets out of the bathroom.
- Chris promises Honesty to Lars, He wants Jackie AND video games
- Chris likes orange soda
- Lars didn't know what Kenan & Kel or Nickelodeon was, he goes to fuck Jackie.
- They say Goodnight
Transcript
External links
