Nerdy Q&A

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The Nerdy Q&A is a video Chris released on 27 March 2016. In the video, Chris answers questions compiled by "an associate" about being "nerdy". This is Chris's first attempt at a video Q&A since 2008, when he released Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008.

Despite the title, the video is little more than a videographic edition of the Attraction Sign. It's ostensibly about "nerd culture", yet every question and answer is either about women Chris finds attractive, would find attractive, or about the attractiveness of Chris himself. Taking this into consideration, it can be assumed that no "associate" was involved, and that Chris just wrote it himself and invented a flimsy excuse about being prompted. Potential evidence of this comes in the form of every question being in first person rather than second ("do I" rather than "do you") which is not how Q&A prompts are written. Further damaging the façade is the "nerd culture" featured in the Q&A, amounting solely to references to the highly dated Scooby-Doo and the insipid Big Bang Theory which is widely detested by the "nerdy" demographic it purports to represent.

He also makes a Lego figure of himself and the the Scooby Doo character Velma, and has them do a "little making out". He also states that she has sex with her in his dreams. He then lists what "nerd girls" he would invite to a sleepover, and of course, includes Mila Kunis and Megan Fox. He even invites the actresses from The Big Bang Theory, but not Amy, as her face does not appeal to Chris. Chris's value on physical appearance is interesting, especially when compared with his apparent feminism, or, more likely, he's still the same shallow, deluded child on a quest for china.

Irrespective of who wrote the Q&A, Chris's answers come as no surprise, with copious mentions of the necessity of physical attractiveness in a potential girlfriend as well as her compulsory willingness to act as a mother figure. It is also unsurprising that there are only nine questions in his list of ten, indicating that he either skipped a question or couldn't keep track of what he was writing and only made nine to begin with.

Despite the overwhelming sophistication and allure of the video, no "nerd girls" seem to have been seduced as yet.

Video

Nerdy Q&A
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Stardate 27 March 2016
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I'd say between her and me we could have quite intellectually stimulating conversations
Not long before Chris says this theoretical nerd girl must have at least a C cup

Description

Transcript

Chris is sitting in his room. The ambient music provided by the PS4 blares.

-coming to you live from home once again... And today, we are going to do some nerdy Q&A... Because I consider myself a bit of a nerd, anyhow... and I have seen a celebrity list of, uh, celebrity nerds, among which including one of my favorite female nerds, so... I had my associate and friend put da- put together a list of questions for me to answer and put a sense of thought IN-TO... trivia's not totally my thing anyhow...

Alright so, question 1: do I consider myserf a nord- a nerd girl? Yes, very much so, 'cos I'm very well-read... I got good scores throughout high school, and college... and all that sort of good stuff... Alright, s-so it's all good there. Anyways, so...

Am I attracted to other nerd girls? Yes, I like... I like in-telligent and smarts and... I find that quite appealing to me. I mean, definitely also uhs... To go with the pretty face, and, uh, good body, pretty much.

If I could date any nerd girl who would it be? Hmm, well considering I had to look up a few other... nerd girls; I got a short list here... I'd have to narrow it down to- I would date... If I could, I would date either Kari Brian [sic] or... Morgan Webb. Anyway also, uh, hmm...

If I could go on a date with either Daphne or Velma from Scooby-Doo, who would I pick?... [Chris grabs two Lego Figures] Velma. Velma-Velma! Here ya go, me and Velma, diddily diddily doo. We go making out [kissing sounds] Yep. In my DREAMS... We make out. Then we'd have sex. Daah!

Would I consider Rosechu a nerd girl? Mmm... Yeah, no, she's not a nerrrd. She's not nerd girl... She can be a big fan about some things, but she's not a total nerd, she doesn- she doesn't- would not consider herself a nerd girl either.

If I could have a nerd girl sleepover party, who would I invite? Well, I'd definitely invite Mila Kunis, Kari Brian, Megan Fox, Morgan Webb, Cindy Crawford, Andy-uh... I'm guessing that they're both- consider themselves nerd girls, the uh... the actresses who play Bernadette and Penny on The Big Bang Theory. Sorry Amy! Yerr... You just don't appeal to me that much. [Slurred gibberish] I'm sorry yeah, it's just the face. it's not your fault.

What's the best reason to date a nerd girl? Mmmm... Well, I'd say between her and me we could have quite intellectually stimulating conversations; mostly I could listen to her talk about what she- what her interests or what some of the things she knows, I could learn from her, and uh, I feel like she could learn from me also! I have an instance of knowledge, I'm so smart, I don't remember everything I know... [bizarre laughter] And that's a quote from the Yellow Submarine. The uh- we would have stimulating conversations, and it would be quite pleasant and uh... We could do it over coffee, tea, or whatever she likes... Anyway,

Why am I the perfect girlfriend for a nerdy girl? Well, I've got a lot to feature, I mean, I'm constantly overlooked and under-appreciated as the lesbian transwoman that I am! If you look at my face, and keep me, and a, you ta- you actually talk to me, come up to me and talk to me, you'll find out I'm definitely quite pleasant and easygoing to hang around with. And I'm definitely quite busty and other figure- other features as well. And, uh, being about five-foot-eleven, if you're shorter then I could reach up and help you there, get what's high up on the shelf. And, uh, shopping, I uh, think, uh, if you wa- if you wa- do want to do shopping, yeah I mean, uh, we could definitely shop for dresses and everything. We'd have a fun time, I would think... Ah, but, depending on her persp- perception, I don- I wa- I can't read minds. But anyway it'd be pleasant and quite easy-going like that. It's all good. Hmm...

If you design a perfect nerd body how does it relate to me? Alright, well, nerd-y, uh, body of, uh, perfect, nerd girlfriend, um, I'd say slim to average... um, she can have... she can have some fat, but not too much fat, alright? And I would definitely say C-cup breasts, minimum. D would be preferred. Cus I've realized the difference between C and D, more recently. Mmm... She should- I would have to have her be about four-foot-eight to five-foot-eleven, hmmm... Long hair. At least, um, down to chin but more preferably shoulder-length or longer. Umm... Hair color is not a factor here, but, umm... I dunno, shade of blue hair would be fun, then we'd match, but... I de- I would, I think I would like brunettes very much, yeah. Uh, but eye color's definitely not a factor, I do any eye color. It's a window into the soul! And also, her face has to be... Ehh, but that depends on my- on- that depends on my perception. She at least has to look good in the face, I am a face person, you know. Hmm, other features... But yeah, she has to be honest, kind, caring, compassionate, can be quite spirited, and successful in her, uh- in her passions and interests... Uhh, able to stimulate me to be able to be more passionate and less... Shy, and everything. Uhh, possibly, uhh, an open mind sexually, also... Yeah with that I'd describe a girl I'd like very much... And also, business-savvy with lots of business knowledge here and there... At least enough to get by, cuz, over my head, a lot of it. You know my mom was secretary for a number o' businesses, she's got more business knowledge than I could ever... Hmmm...

Anyway, so, that's ten Q&A nerd questions for, initially... If umm, if I find more questions I can put more thought and detail into that I could answer, my associate will put that together for me. But until next livestreaming, dunno when that'll be, thank y'all for watching and have a good safe day.

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