Asperchu/Background
This article is about Asperchu, a very well thought out webcomic.
For Chris's views and such and all that, see Asperchu.
| “ | I think Asperchu is a pretty nice guy. He faces his fear of rejection, tries his best to be tactful and humble, and he just wants somebody to love.
Oh dear god, you made a sympathetic bizzaro Chris. |
” |
| An anon on /cwc/, summarizing what makes Asperchu so unique. | ||
| “ | I detest "Asperchu", because one, it is a Parody of a Sonichu with aspergers, which with the condition, I have no care for. And two, it is just lousy; if aspergers is really like autism, then the creator really knows nothing about Autism. | ” |
| Chris on Asperchu, Mailbag 24 | ||
Asperchu is a parody of Sonichu detailing the zany misadventures of Asperchu, the electric hedgehog Pokemon with high functioning autism Asperger syndrome. It can be read here, its homepage is here and the /cwc/ thread can be found here. The creator of this delightful series sometimes forgets to upload a page or two in chronological order, but this is due to his Asperger's Syndrome affecting his memory.
Notably, it has a brief mention on CWCipedia in Chris's list of Sonichu parodies.
Protagonists
Asperchu
One day, Sonichu wandered into a stall the bathroom at the Minneapolis International Airport. While tapping his foot underneath the wall of the stall next to him, he accidentally brushed his foot against that of a man who had Aspergers Syndrome; the resulting union birthed the lovable hero we all know today.
Asperchu grew up in Minnesota, where he attended Catholic school for 12 years (it would have been 13 but he was allowed to skip 1st grade due to how high-functioning he was even as a young child); he currently considers himself to be a non-denominational christian who follows the Word of GodJesus with his sound mind and heart. Asperchu's father went out to get a case of beer and promised to be right back, although this was some time in late 2003 and he hasn't been seen since. Asperchu currently lives in Eden Prairie, Minnesota with his grandparents, Grandma Snorlax and Grandpa Alzheichu. When not working hard on Youtube videos, he prefers to relax by playing video games on his Xbox 360 or hanging out with his joy-boys at the mall food court. He attends Normandale Community College with his two best joy-boys, Max and Jivin, where he is pursuing an associates degree in Radiologic Technology.
His dreams lie outside of religion or career, however: He is currently on a Love Quest to obtain a gal-pal who he can build into a sweetheart from the ground up. His standards for a gal-pal are not terribly stringent, although he will not abide gingers or tolerate those who do. Although he is normally a humble and empathic person, he has been known to let his goal-oriented mental block get the best of him, such as during his endeavor to prove that he is the only true and honest christian.
Asperchu is a high-functioning electric/aspergers hedgehog pokemon. He has no electric-type attacks; however, his aspergers-type attacks do double damage against autistic-type pokemon. His strongest attack is the Asperhameha, which hits his target with a blast of furious energy and can leave them confused and prone to developing mental blocks of their own.
- Asperchu is, of course, based on Christian Weston Chandler; his overweight appearance and clothing precisely emulate Chris's, and Asperchu's goatee is from Chris's Rollin' and Trollin' phase. Asperchu's mannerisms are also directly copied from Chris, especially the ego, narcissism, self-entitlement, and fixation on the Love Quest. Also, Asperchu's saga parallels Chris's descent into madness, with early issues focusing on Asperchu's fairly-innocent Love Quest, and later issues showing him to be just as big a prick as Chris has become.
Sonichu
The brother, father (technically, one of two fathers), hetero-life mate, and STRAIGHT joy-boy of Asperchu, with whom he is engaged in an everlasting, STRAIGHT bromance. Sonichu shows up from time to time to assist Asperchu in his adventures and in defeating the villainous forces of the Troll Lords. Even if there aren't any villains to fight or adventures to be had, however, Sonichu and Asperchu just can't stand to be apart for long, so occasionally they will meet up for a late night snuggling rendezvous. He is currently running for the office of District Attorney of the state of Virginia, on a vigorous platform of promoting both gay rights and recognition of Aspergers Syndrome as a component of the Autism Spectrum.
Max
One of Asperchu's best friends. He is always a True, Caring friend who only ever looks out for his joy-boys. He is composed of 80% memory foam and is capable of absorbing the properties and attacks of other people by temporarily ingesting them.
Jivin Pickles
The son of a prominent cucumber farmer, Jivin is Asperchu's black best friend who is black. He is keen to assist Asperchu in his Love Quest, although some speculate it is merely an excuse for him to pursue his own personal Fuck Quest, as his attitude toward gal-pals, while enthusiastic, appears less than wholesome at times. Instead of Christmas, Jivin celebrates Kwanzaa. Asperchu has suggested that he possibly does not realize Jivin is black. The Pickles family are the guardians of one of the seven Chaos Pickles.
Villainous trolls
Sinestro
As the apparent leader of the trolls, Sinestro attempted to create numerous clones of Asperchu in order to find the seven Chaos Pickles, but his first twelve attempts failed. For his thirteenth, he sent Lisa to obtain Asperchu's Medallion and sent Dino Dash to abduct Asperchu's future sweetheart, Dixie Chu, in order to bring Asperchu's heart to 0%. By doing so, he would be able to use the medallion to transfer Asperchu's heart power to Metal Asperchu, his newest creation. This backfired when Metal Asperchu refused to follow Sinestro's orders, so he proceeded to make another clone.
Lisa
A girl who attends Normandale Community College, Asperchu took a fancy to her, and worked up the courage to ask her on a date for some fine dining and pleasant conversation at the local Burger King; she agreed. However, her plan all along was to embarrass Asperchu by substituting herself with an overweight ginger girl and video taping it for display on her blog, and then purloin Asperchu's Medallion of Power in order to gain access to his Magic. Although Asperchu later defeated her in battle, she still succeeded in both goals, which temporarily broke Asperchu's Heart Level down to about 40%. She is the person responsible for inciting Asperchu to create his own Youtube account so that he could make war on Trolls far and wide. She appears to be in the employ of a mysterious Troll Lord, to whom she delivered the Medallion.
- Lisa most closely resembles Chris's ex-sweetheart Blanca. As with Lisa, Blanca pretended to be interested in Chris in order to steal his medallion.
Radar
GJ-Radar, known as John to people who aren't Asperchu. A Born-Again Baptist from rural Texas, he and his fiance Kendra traveled to Minnesota after becoming aware of Asperchu's Youtube rants, which they deemed sacrilegious and sinful. They promptly began proselytizing their particular brand of Christianity to all who would hear. Soon John confronted Asperchu and demanded he overcome his hypocrisy; Asperchu responded by challenging him to a Youtube Godstar Challenge to prove who the real Christian was. Asperchu set the rules of the Youtube Triathlon: Each participant would have to sing their favorite Bible hymn, tell their favorite parable of GodJesus, and display the potency of their GodJesus Magic; the winner would be determined by viewers. Asperchu lost the first two components to John while the third was a draw because Asperchu's Magic only managed to damage his Xbox camera, while John refused to attempt such abhorrent shamanism; John was declared to be the one true Christian, while Asperchu was declared a fraud. Asperchu subsequently stole John's own crucifix necklace and used it to power his Jesus-hameha attack, which hit and injured Kendra when she intervened. Sinestro approached John, offering to heal Kendra in return for his services.
- Based off the Singstar Challenge of the Liquid Saga. John and Kendra most likely represent Liquid and Kacey
Dino Dash
Dino Dash kidnapped Jonas Chu in order to impersonate him at the Guitar Hero championship and abduct Dixie Chu as part of Sinestro's plan to obtain the seven Chaos Pickles. He is the strongest and most cunning of Sinestro's pawns.
- Dino Dash is based on Clyde Cash
Count Plot Cohesuon
- Count Plot Cohesuon is a parody of Count Graduon from the original Sonichu comic.
Metal Asperchu
Metal Asperchu was to be Sinestro's ultimate tool in finding the seven Chaos Pickles, but refused to follow his orders and proceeded to seek the Chaos Pickles on his own. Metal attacked Simonchu and stole his medallion to guide his quest.
- Based off Metal Sonichu who is based off Metal Sonic.
Noir Chu and Aspercream
Noir Chu was Sinestro's newest attempt to clone Asperchu by adding a black man into the mix. However, DeShaun's girlfriend jumped into the mixture with him and was turned into the rabbit Aspercream.
- Noir Chu is based on Blake.
Ian Brandon Anderson
Ian believes himself to be the TRUE and ORIGINAL Christian Weston Chandler, but is instead a fat, insane man-child. Ian rules CWCville through a totalitarian regime, although the CWCville Liberation Front constantly fights against his evil oppression. He forced women in middle school and older into prostitution as a form of sexual education.
If he doesn't get his way, he uses his Transformers gun to silence anyone who questions his delusions. Ian attempted to murder Christian to prove that he was the real Chris Chan and also attempted to murder the "parodic" Sonichus before being set on fire by Metal Asperchu. He hasn't been seen since.
- Ian Brandon Anderson is a version of Chris based on the Liquid Chris saga. Ian's appearance is a direct parody of Chris's.
Supporting characters
Dixie Chu
The girl of Asperchu's dreams. Dixie been dating Jonas Chu and is disgusted by Asperchu, but that fact hasn't kept Asperchu from pursuing her. Asperchu has dedicated his life to obtaining "Dix" as his sweetheart.
Jonas Chu
Asperchu's rival for the heart of Dixie Chu. Asperchu first met Jonas Chu at the Brass Dragon, where, in preparation for the Guitar Hero championship, they competed for the right to be Dixie Chu's boyfriend. Jonas beat Asperchu, but only by "cheating" by playing on Hard mode, which Asperchu had not yet mastered. Jonas was then kidnapped so that Dino Dash could replace him in the tournament and abduct Dixie.
He escaped over a week later by chewing through his handcuffs. Jonas followed Max and Jivin to Sinestro's castle, where he was reunited with his love.
- May have been based off the events from CWC More Than A Feeling of the Liquid Saga.
The Chaotic Combo
Wild Sonichu is the leader of the Chaotic Combo and Simonchu's gay lover.
Angelica Rosechu uses her wings and her faith in GodJesus to help her fight the forces of evil.
Punchy Sonichu is the master of the "anshuent Chinaman martial arts." He has a very noticeable accent due to his ethnicity.
Bubbles Rosechu is the entirely useless member who just hangs out with the group.
Magi-Chan Sonichu uses his psychic powers to aid the Chaotic Combo. Magi-Chan is able to locate any person by going into a five-and-a-half hour trance. He also likes to go on long walks in the park and Mass debate to videos of Simonchu and Wild's Honeymoon tapes.
Wild, Angelica and Punchy were all brutally murdered by Metal Asperchu.
Simonchu
Although Simonchu stars in his own comic series, he appears in Asperchu as the bisexual lover of Wild Sonichu. Metal Asperchu attacked Simonchu and stole his medallion.
Christian Weston Chandler
Sonichu's father and creator. Christian is the hero of CWCville, always willing to risk his life and do what is necessary for the greater good. After assisting Asperchu's assault on Sinestro's castle, Christian left to pursue Ian Brandon Anderson.
- Christian Chandler is based on Liquid Chris.
Alzeichu
Asperchu's grandfather, an old-fashioned Sonichu who spends most of his time sitting in his armchair and watching television. He also likes to make Asperchu do stressful chores around the house. Alzeichu is married to Snorlax.
- Alzeichu is based on Robert Chandler.
Snorlax
Asperchu's grandmother. Spends all of her time sleeping in the backyard. Snorlax is married to Alzeichu.
- Snorlax is the nickname given to Barbara Chandler.
Asperia Chu
The future daughter of Asperchu, as foretold by GodJesus in a dream. Asperia Chu is definitely not a ginger.
- Asperia Chu is based on Crystal Chandler. As with Crystal, her name is a feminine version of her "father's".
Larry D. Waltz
Larry D. Waltz is the dean of Normandale Community College. He supplies Sinestro with an African-American in exchange for a mysterious disc.
- Larry is based on Mary Lee Walsh.
Style
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This article is still yet to be completed due to stress. We get a lot of stressful torture in our lives that makes us crash into slumber. Given that inspiration is a big variable, and we may have been lacking of it, this article will be completed as soon as possible, at our own pace... HONEST!
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This article, like Chris's pickle, is a bit small. You can help CWCki by expanding it. |