Fridays After Five

Fridays After Five is a large block party/concert series that takes place in Charlottesville from spring until fall. In June 2010 Chris was video recorded there, enjoying real life for once.

Chris first mentioned Fridays After Five in a video explaining his near hit-and-run on Michael Snyder. Based upon this knowledge, the manchild has been attending the event since at least 4 June 2010.

June 18th Sighting

You know he's straight because his bra says so.

Chris trying to pick up a boyfriend-free girl.

CWC's plan B.

On 18 June 2010, Chris went to one of these events and a good samaritan (YouTube name 0ArchieBunker0) took these videos and pictures of him out in public. According to the author, Chris wore a T-shirt that says "I Enjoy Vagina" and was wearing a "gay circular thing" on his hip which is most likely his PokéWalker. At some point Chris pulled back his crude shirt to reveal his flabby gut and female support wear, which he had apparently seen fit to write "WANT WOMAN!" on with permanent marker. Note the apparent, inexplicable (knowing Chris) absence of the Medallion of Fail - although it could have been removed just temporarily in order to simplify the (probably planned) act of pulling back the shirt.

Chris's clothing indicates he is looking to put a new twist on his old tricks. Like the attraction sign, Chris is shown making a point to display the writing on his clothing, declaring that he "enjoys vagina" and "wants woman". This is yet another example that this autistic man-child does not learn from the mistakes of his past. Also, the videos filmed at this event mostly showed the back of Chris's head, which shows a small but emerging bald spot.

Besides exposing his covered bosom to potential sweethearts - mostly severely underage - Chris spent his time at the event drawing flipnotes on his Nintendo DSi, and trying to dance with a disturbing mix of Chicken Dance and autism - with all the grace and skill of CWC Fighter.

It is unlikely that Chris was aware of being photographed, which proves that all these actions are Chris's idea of being normal. When Chris eventually realized (or it seemed so) he was being observed, he suddenly disappeared like Batman.

July 4th Sighting

On 9 July a troll reported that they had spotted Chris at the Independence Day celebrations held at McIntire Park on 4 July. Chris allegedly wore relatively normal clothing, indicating that perhaps he had realized how retarded he looked on his previous outing.

The troll reported that Chris had what appeared to be a large camera lens attached to the front of his DSi, and was presumably using it to survey the area for Boyfriend-free girls.

Interestingly, the troll also reported that Chris scribbled a note onto something, wrapped it around a rock, and chucked it at a woman in what would appear to be a more aggressive and direct twist to the Red String of Fate tactic. Whatever was written on that note currently remains a mystery.

The troll's account in full:


I have followed the Chris trolling for a while, because who could resist reading about some guy who lived in the same city as you? Though I never would have expected to run into the elusive manchild, that is, until July 4th. Every year, McIntire Park shoots off fireworks for the July 4th. Many families come out to watch, despite the decline in quality each year due to money problems. So imagine my surprise when I see the internet sensation himself. I had to do a double take to make sure. No, he wasn't wearing anything outrageous like in Friday's After 5 footage. No Sonichu medallion. I guess he really has given up on Sonichu. I didn't stalk him the entire time he was there, but kept tabs every once in a while. He spent a lot of time near the baseball field. At one point I noticed he pulled out his DSi, with something odd attached to the front of it. It looked like a zoom lense. But do they make zoom lenses for the DSi? I thought the camera quality was already shit. He seemed to use his DSi and what I think is the zoom lense looking at the people around here, presumably women, considering the creepy person he is. A little while later I noticed he had gotten up and started to walk, to where, I don't know. Then he stopped. Now, I don't know how to make of this...I saw him scribble on something, wrap it around what I think he picked up was a rock, and threw it at this woman. I don't think it hit her, but she seemed startled. She picked up whatever he threw, opened up the paper he had written on, looked at him, and shook her head. She then turned and went on her way. At that point, I decided to leave it at that and go back to hanging out with my friends. I didn't see him after that point. I assume he decided to change where he was sitting or people were just blocking my view, because as it got darker it got incredibly more busy.