Difference between revisions of "R.L. Stine"
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Robert Lawrence Stine, famed author of the | [[image:Stine.jpg|thumb|left|They even look the same GODDAMN!]] | ||
Robert Lawrence Stine, famed author of the children's horror series Goosebumps, is frequently cited by Chris as a major literary influence.<ref>[[Mumble 4]]</ref> To be painfully honest, besides Of Mice and Men and The Giver (which were almost definitely required reading in whatever English course he took), Mr. Stine's novels are Chris's ''only'' literary influence. This means that all of [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]]'s [[Mumble 4|Fight Club references]] fly right over his [[Hair|greasy little head]] and out into the [[Time Void]]. | |||
[[Image:RLSTINE.jpg|thumb|right|Christian posing as a harmless young boy with his favorite book.]] | [[Image:RLSTINE.jpg|thumb|right|Christian posing as a harmless young boy with his favorite book.]] | ||
Why is it that Chris | Why is it that Chris made the effort to actually read Stine's many mediocre paperbacks? Besides [[A Week With Christian Chandler|reading them to avoid paying attention in class]], it's easily explained by his personality. Ponder for a moment the hypercommercialized fandoms that make up every other facet of Chris's miserable existence: [[Sonic]], [[Pokémon]], [[My Little Pony]], [[Yu-Gi-Oh!]], [[Sonichu (comic)|arts'n'crafts]], [[My big 18th party (story)|Good Burger]], [[Lego]], [[LittleBigPlanet|video games completely lacking in adult themes]], [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|etc.]] Chris's interests form the most childish collage of failure ever to be held by a human being. It isn't hard to believe that whatever slight thirst for the written word he possesses can be easily quenched by a bunch of grade-school level novels - though [[Autism|autistic]], [[Chris and sex|sexually frustrated]] man-children are probably not the demographic R.L. Stine was going for. | ||
But it might be a deeper connection than simply bad taste. | But it might be a deeper connection than simply bad taste. | ||
{{quote|[[Donald Duck impersonation|I feel happy to terrify kids.]]|R.L. Stine}} | {{quote|[[Donald Duck impersonation|I feel happy to terrify kids.]]|R.L. Stine}} | ||
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==Literary Influence== | ==Literary Influence== | ||
Despite being 27, Chris still cites Stine as his favorite author. Worse, he seems to know R.L. Stine primarily or exclusively through the Goosebumps and Fear Street series and | Despite being 27, Chris still cites Stine as his favorite author. Worse, he seems to know R.L. Stine primarily or exclusively through the Goosebumps and Fear Street series, and seems unaware or uninterested in Stine's more gruesome, violent, and (very slightly) realistic teenage novels. Stine's not the best novelist around by a long shot; if Chris had to choose one author to read forever, he backed the wrong horse. The Goosebumps and Fear Street books are full of bizarre, nonsensical plot twists, simplistic characters, groaner puns, and ridiculous deus/diabolus ex machinae to either spring characters out of trouble or get them in even deeper. Sound familiar? | ||
Bear in mind, | Bear in mind, also, that these books are aimed at children who like goofy stuff like that, and most who kept reading after grade school moved on to more challenging fare as they grew up. Chris, though, stayed with Stine through thick and thin well into high school and seemingly beyond. Through a combination of laziness and [[PS3|fanboyish hostility]] (according to the Dark Christian [[The Wall of Originals|Pokemon card,]] he hated Harry Potter purely because it was replacing Pokemon in popularity), he didn't bite any other literary hooks that came his way. Thus he has no familiarity with literature for grownups, nor any apparent interest. He has no grasp of symbolism, subtlety, foreshadowing, or any other literary technique or style. He might not even read anything outside of Sonic the Hedgehog comics and pornographic manga nowadays. As any published author can tell you, writing from such a severely restricted reference pool is a recipe for [[Sonichu (comic)|disaster]]. | ||
R.L. Stine once extolled his readers to read all kinds of books from different authors and genres. This is yet another piece of good advice to fall | R.L. Stine once extolled his readers to read all kinds of books from different authors and genres. This is yet another piece of good advice to fall on Chris's deaf ears. | ||
==In Summation== | ==In Summation== | ||
The [[Honest Content|HONEST TRUTH]] is that | The [[Honest Content|HONEST TRUTH]] is that Chris is a 27 year old preteen who is either unable or unwilling to grow up and read big boy books. | ||
==Sauce== | ==Sauce== | ||
Revision as of 00:47, 18 November 2009
Robert Lawrence Stine, famed author of the children's horror series Goosebumps, is frequently cited by Chris as a major literary influence.[1] To be painfully honest, besides Of Mice and Men and The Giver (which were almost definitely required reading in whatever English course he took), Mr. Stine's novels are Chris's only literary influence. This means that all of Clyde's Fight Club references fly right over his greasy little head and out into the Time Void.
Why is it that Chris made the effort to actually read Stine's many mediocre paperbacks? Besides reading them to avoid paying attention in class, it's easily explained by his personality. Ponder for a moment the hypercommercialized fandoms that make up every other facet of Chris's miserable existence: Sonic, Pokémon, My Little Pony, Yu-Gi-Oh!, arts'n'crafts, Good Burger, Lego, video games completely lacking in adult themes, etc. Chris's interests form the most childish collage of failure ever to be held by a human being. It isn't hard to believe that whatever slight thirst for the written word he possesses can be easily quenched by a bunch of grade-school level novels - though autistic, sexually frustrated man-children are probably not the demographic R.L. Stine was going for.
But it might be a deeper connection than simply bad taste.
| “ | I feel happy to terrify kids. | ” |
| R.L. Stine | ||
| “ | I guess I'm way too kind and generous, and a saint - if you can believe that! | ” |
| R.L. Stine | ||
| “ | I have a cheat-sheet for each one of my characters about their personality, the way they look, etc. So there is no possible way that I could have writer's block. | ” |
| R.L. Stine | ||
Literary Influence
Despite being 27, Chris still cites Stine as his favorite author. Worse, he seems to know R.L. Stine primarily or exclusively through the Goosebumps and Fear Street series, and seems unaware or uninterested in Stine's more gruesome, violent, and (very slightly) realistic teenage novels. Stine's not the best novelist around by a long shot; if Chris had to choose one author to read forever, he backed the wrong horse. The Goosebumps and Fear Street books are full of bizarre, nonsensical plot twists, simplistic characters, groaner puns, and ridiculous deus/diabolus ex machinae to either spring characters out of trouble or get them in even deeper. Sound familiar?
Bear in mind, also, that these books are aimed at children who like goofy stuff like that, and most who kept reading after grade school moved on to more challenging fare as they grew up. Chris, though, stayed with Stine through thick and thin well into high school and seemingly beyond. Through a combination of laziness and fanboyish hostility (according to the Dark Christian Pokemon card, he hated Harry Potter purely because it was replacing Pokemon in popularity), he didn't bite any other literary hooks that came his way. Thus he has no familiarity with literature for grownups, nor any apparent interest. He has no grasp of symbolism, subtlety, foreshadowing, or any other literary technique or style. He might not even read anything outside of Sonic the Hedgehog comics and pornographic manga nowadays. As any published author can tell you, writing from such a severely restricted reference pool is a recipe for disaster.
R.L. Stine once extolled his readers to read all kinds of books from different authors and genres. This is yet another piece of good advice to fall on Chris's deaf ears.
In Summation
The HONEST TRUTH is that Chris is a 27 year old preteen who is either unable or unwilling to grow up and read big boy books.