F Abstinance
F Abstinance [sic] (officially "F Abstinance.MOV") is a video uploaded on to YouTube on 28 March 2010. Chris goes on a tirade about abstinence, apparently because he thinks it will create more virgins with rage like him. This would be somewhat ironic considering his Christian faith, except that it's only further proof that Chris knows nothing about the faith he professes.
Chris also tells everyone to not buy any of the Sonichu books up for sale on the internet because he isn't getting paid for any of it. After commanding people not to buy the unauthorized comics, though, he goes on to say that "small things" such as "dolls, toys, backpacks" are acceptable, a contradiction he doesn't explain.
Chris deleted this video from YouTube within hours of uploading it.
| “ | AND Practice Safe Sex with proper Condom or B.C. medication usage. Ask your parents or teachers for more info, or look it up on the internet or library.
Also, the Sonic and the Werehog Costumes in LittleBiGPlanet; the Headdress needs to be TWO PARTS; EARS for HEAD, and SPIKES for HAIR. And the Spines and Tail need to be TWO PARTS; TAIL for WAIST, and Spines for NECK. |
” |
| The video's original description on YouTube. | ||
Video
| F Abstinance.MOV | |
| Stardate | 28 March 2010 |
| Subject Matter |  Sex
|
| Performance Style |  Rage
|
| Shirt |  Captain Falcon
|
| OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos | |
| previous Cleveland Show Voice Rant |
next Current |
Transcription
Just a thought that I'd like to share with everybody:
Abstinence, if you're just learning about it, abstinence is nothing but crap. It is a whole fucking bunch of baloney. If eh- if I had the opportunity, I would- if I was in an assembly, I would stand right up in my chair and I would say "FUCK UP- FUCK ABSTINENCE!"
[Chris thrusts his right index finger in the air for emphasis.]
Shout it right to the choir. I mean 'cause if you got abstinence, then what- then what do you get? End up being an adult virgin, or even worse, a senior citizen virgin and that is like a hell to most anybody. And you can tell 'em that I, Christian Weston Chandler, promotes you to say "FUCK ABSTINENCE!"
[Chris punctuates his shout with another fist-pump, then collects himself and puts on his glasses.]
Updates are to come on the CWCipedia soon and do not buy any of the quote unquote books anywhere on the internet because I have not approved of any such books and I'm not getting a dim- and I'm not seeing a penny out of that. So if there's anything that I'm not seeing a penny out of, eh- books or DVDs, yeah do not buy. Otherwise would like, you know dolls, toys, backpacks wh- that sort of- that sort of small thing, yeah that's fine, that's okay. I'll approve that.
Anyway, everybody else, have a good day.
| ⇐ Cleveland Show Voice Rant | Chris's videos | Current ⇒ |