PS3 Tutorial for my fans

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Revision as of 00:36, 25 February 2010 by Manzanera (talk | contribs) (blarrgh transcribing sucks)
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PS3 Tutorial for my fans is the second video uploaded by Christian on February 24th, 2010. In the classic tradition of videos like Sonichu Powerpoint, Chris goes aimlessly on and on trying to explain something comlicated beyond his comprehension, this time to his mystery birthday guest.

The Video

PS3 Tutorial for my fans
Stardate 24 February 2010
Subject Matter PS3
Performance Style CrazyCrazy Crazy
Saga N/A
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Transcript

Chris: [fragmented sentence] ...South Park theme.

???: Ha-ha!

Chris: It makes little..[begins flicking back and forth on the PS3] noises when you, between it. Ess. Circle. [PS3 squawks in response to Chris's fumbling]]

???: Oh, that's cool.

Chris: Oh, wait a minute. [unintelligible]...triangle.

???: That's really yellow. [chuckle] How do ya sign into the-the Playstation Network?

Chris: [still flicking around] Well first of all yo make sure your system- er, your console is up to date with version 3.15 which ah, you find that out after you ah, log in- you get on the- you get your Playstation 3 internet capable. [Our mystery guest injects with "right"]

???: [interrupting blathering] That's like an automatic update?

Chris: [trying to talk over the guy for a bit] Yeah, then you go to System Update here, and you update via internet. Course, y'know it'll give you different than that. [addressing the extremely blurry screen]]

???: Mm-hm.

Chris: And it'll tell you that you need to update it. Anyway once you got that you can definitely sign in; in that case you'll want to make yourself a new account. And, uh, I mean obviously I got mine in there [Our incognito imbroglio makes more affirmative noises] But-but still to sign in you'll have to have- to make a new Play-playstation network account.

???: [odd tone] Okay.

Chris: And uh, that wheres it'll take you to the process of putting in your address, phone number, and name-

???: And it'll just walk you through it?

Chris: Yeah.

???: Okay-

Chris: Anyway when you go to sign in [demonstrating poorly], I recommend you not to save the password, but write in down.

???: Right.

Chris: But- you can- And then you can memorize it, I definitely got mine memorized. [more goddamn squawking from the machine] I use the wireless keypad.

???: [after an awkward beat] Oh snap, there's a keypad on those things!

Chris: [demonstrating able conversational skills] Yeah.

???: That is wild- I didn't know-

Chris: It's attached-

???: Oh, okay; I was like [slight falsetto] "I don't remember those".

Chris: It was worth it, I think it was like 20 bucks. Anyway then you can asess, uh, all your, uh all your- your own profile and everybody elses [zoom in on Sonichu, Chris's PSN]. And then of course with your trophy- because you can definitely sink the trophies you earn into games and let you know what level your at- I'm at level 12, got 739 trophies.

???: Good lord.

Chris: Then of course you put in side your personal- My online ID is Sonichu-

???: [laughs and adopts an officious tone] "About me: I am Chris Chan" Heh, I like that.

Chris: Yeah, that works. Oh, and uh, also on this part here you can change the backi- you can change the color. [demonstrates once more]

???: Oh, that's cool.

Chris: That's from one of the curr- the recent updates. And of course you can start a new chat with the Playstation eye with the microphone in there or just chat audio only with a headset.

???: Mkay.

Chris: [more fucking moving around] Add friend, block list there. And of course, Account Management, here, you go in there and put in and remove your credit or debit card information. I mean yeah, I put it in then added the amount I want and I delete it. And then of course [scrolls down] you can change your email address, uh password, all that good stuff.

???: That's cool

Chris: [talking over yet again] And the avatars are are fun, y'know, you get a lot choose from. I bought all the LittleBigPlanet ones; I had to purchase all of those ones. I mean, it was feature thing but I still kick myself today for getting all the LittleBigPlanet avatars. [??? laughs softly] But yeah you still get a lot to choose from-

???: Is that..George Clooney? [Chris hunts around a bit] Up one. That looks so much like George Clooney.

Chris: Hmm. I don't think so. I think- maybe that's the guy from Wanted?

???: That might be it.

Chris: [yawn-tastic scrolling] Then we got Eye of Judgement characters. Of course all the ones you get under LittleBig Planet are the ones you get right off the bat.

???: Right

Chris: Ratchet and Clank, Uncharted, Killzone, [slight unison with guest] Kratos, yeah. Whole buncha- whole bunch of good ones- does are [indicates some avatars] those are, Calling All Cars- its a downloadable game.

???: Boy, you got a ton of 'em.

Chris: Yeah, you get all these right off the bat. But if you want the more current avatars they're coming out with you have to pay- you have to pay for them. Then you can also, you know, redeem codes, like uh, you know, for a promotions, just punch in the four digits at a time from the box and you take it. And then you can got to your transaction management. Like you know, thats where you gotta go from here [displays avatar menu icon] from your credit-debit card, to transfer here, to the wallet. And I would definl- make it have to require password to checkout.

???: Yeah.

Chris, -In case somebody does come in. Then you can look at your transaction history, you can look as far back, as uh, when I got this thing, which was back in uh, St Patrick's day

Guest: Oh, that's cool.

[Screen displays a list of purchases.]

Chris: So that's pretty much the orign point, you know, first time I downloaded off Playstation network was, you know, a few demos off of...

Guest: Okay.

Chris: Few Demos.

Guest: That's cool.

Chris: And yeah, like I said you can add lots more than that. And then you get your list of downloads, between the uh, video and game section. Oh, and also, you know, the current update. [Screen scrolls to a Facebook icon.] You can adjust the settngs so- adjust the setting and features in facebook, to make uh, your trophies visible to everybody else. Of course, you have to activate your- activate your system between this- between your PS3 or PSP...

Guest: Mmm-hmmm.

Chris: To make it able to play the games and videos you download respectively. And of course on the PSP, you gotta do game, and video and comics, because only the PSP does the digital comics.

Guest: Oh, okay.

Chris: You can only download them basically through the PSP.


Guest: Oh yeah.

Chris: Only on the PSP. With the playstation-

Guest: I had- I had a friend who had the PSP, he had the star Trek Comic, the prequel to the new Star Trek Movie.

Chris: Yeah, I-

Guest: He had that one.

Chris: Yeah, Yeah- of course you know, you could definately sample in the free ones. [Playstation store come up onscreen] And then you go to the PlayStation store. And this- and by default it takes you to the games section. You can check out the new releases. They come out with new Playstation One classics every once in awhile there every moth. Course all demos are free, selected add-ons you have to pay for them, but yet some add-ons are free. And yeah that's where you can- Oh! They added more avatars now.

Guest: Oh, cool.

Chris: For Mag. Huh. For 59 cents ea- 49 cents for the Mag ones.

Guest: That's not too bad.

Chris: Although here for LittleBigPlanet, yeah. That was pretty much the same thing but I got them in uh, I got the LittleBigPlanet ones in the bundles, which uh, you know, was less expensive than getting them individually. Then of course you get your games here. You can view em all by title, so you can make sure you don't- you don't miss out on every single freebie...

Guest: Uh huh.

Chris: ...between demos and add-ons. And of course, they have uh ones that are for PSP as well.

Guest: I'm getting cold. I just got back from the Yoga, so my body's all warmed up...

Chris: Yeah.

Guest: It's cooling off now.

Chris: And of course you can download uh, themes and avatars uh, from you know just basic themes where the background is not in motion, or the premium themes which uh, actually you have to pay for.

[As Chris drones on, the guest/cameraman takes the camera off the screen and starts panning around Chris's walls. Clear shots of the Marge Simpson playboy centerfold, Chris's Copyright, the Wall of Originals and a variety of sonichu drawing.]

Guest: Mmm Hmm.

Chris: Heh. Check it out you can get the "Babealishous" themes.

[Camera returns to the screen, now showing a bunch of swimsuit model avatars]

Guest: Oh cool. Oh Oh! Second row in the middle, down one. Oh it' Dina Fonchez, for some reason I thought it was Betty Paige for a second.

Chris: They're organized alphabetically. I don't see bet- I don't see Betty Paige. Of course you can preview these as well, even in full screen.

[Screen is overtaken by a photo of a swimsuit model]

Guest: Oh that's cool.

[Screen switiches between two photos of a hot chick a few times]

Guest:I like that one!

Chris: Heh heh. Yeah. And then of course you got the dynamic themes, where most of the time you do have to pay for those.

Guest: Right.

Chris: Of course you can check them out in preview mode as well.

[Screen is overtaken by a CGI render of dude in a muscle shirt.]

Chris: Some of them animated, some of them just in still.

Guest: [Laughs]

Chris: That's for Pain. It's a fun game.

Guest: I like that one. What's uh, what is pain about?

Chris: Oh. that's a fun- that's a fun game uh- look that up here.

[Screen changes to description for Pain]

Chris: here you go. It's the funnest game in town. [Chris begins reading the discription aloud] "Load character into a supersized ultra-powerful slingshot, and lauch then into an active, physics-controlled enviornment filled with precarious and humorous situations. Score points by stringing together painful collisions and unleashing chaos on the downdown enviornment. Join the Pain online community to keep up with Pain's ever growing gameplay. Compete with uh- compete with others worldwide on the global Leaderboards. [It should be noted that Chris prounounced leaderboards "Lawerboards".] See you in Pain!" And the features include crash course, uh, this is for the basic one right here.

Guest: [Disinterested] Mmm-hmm.

Chris: This crash course tutorial, detailed downtown, pain for your character in difficult situations, single player, Paindimonium, aftermath, mime toss, and spank the monkey. Three multiplayer modes, show off your skills to earn over 50 trophies, and learn how to lock new game features in the trophy room.

[Video abruptly ends.]


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