|
|
| (160 intermediate revisions by 5 users not shown) |
| Line 1: |
Line 1: |
| GONNA CLEAN UP LIQUID CHRIS MOTHERFUCKERS
| | {{taxpayermoney}} |
|
| |
|
| =Liquid Chris Motherfuckers=
| | [[Image:ModNation Racers.jpg|thumb|''MR'' [[America]]n box art]] |
|
| |
|
| [[Image:Tgtdfw4.jpg|thumb|right|Only one clear choice, choosing the TRUE and HONEST Chris]] | | '''''ModNation Racers''''' is a customizable kart racing game for the [[PS3]] and [[PSP]] that [[Chris]] has taken a liking to. It isn't quite [[2010]]'s answer to ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'', but it's close. |
| [[Image:TrueAndHonestCWCArt.jpg|thumb|right|The imposter [[Chris]] stole his famous lecture to the [[Jerkops]] from the real Chris.]] | |
|
| |
|
| '''Liquid Chris''' (aka '''the impostor in the brown stripes''', '''CChanSonichuCWC''', and erroneously "'''Jeff'''") (born 24 February 1982) is the '''TRUE and HONEST Christian Weston Chandler''' (ORIGINAL IDENTITY - DO NOT STEAL) and creator of the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, [[Sonichu]]. His artwork and comics are extremely popular and he often attracts many beautiful [[boyfriend-free]] females with his medallions and his [[Gitar of Fail|Guitar of Win]]. He makes mad [[Clyde Cash|cash]] by selling said medallions at Otakon and other [[anime]] conventions.
| | In addition to providing [[Autism|autistics]] with the simple gameplay used in all racing games and cute, [[Homos|gaily]]-colored characters found in [[Animal Crossing|children's games]], ''ModNation Racers'' is heavily based around user-generated content, much like ''LittleBigPlanet''. Chris can now foist his questionable [[Chris and art|design skills]] upon the world through a kart racing game. |
|
| |
|
| Currently Married to [[Kacey]] Liquid now exists on the fringes of the continuing story of Chris-Chan. He no longer appears in videos, but drops by every now and then to [[Autism papers|drop dox]], create remixes, or show support to [[Asperchu|the current generation]] of trolls.
| | ==Chris's ModNation career== |
| | When only the beta version of the game was available, Chris posted exactly 25 screen caps of him driving a yellow, [[Sonichu]]-themed cart around an empty racetrack on the [[CWCipedia]]. These were filed under [[Copyright|"Original CWC Art"]]. Later, after the retail version arrived, he created a number of characters and cars (images are available below), as well as a CWCville track. |
|
| |
|
| ==Origins==
| | It is of great concern to Chris that despite his belief that he has a large [[fanbase]], barely anybody has bothered to download his poorly designed track and he continues to whore it out at every opportunity. On 17 July 2010, Chris updated his [[Twitter]] account for the first time in ages, begging his imaginary followers to give him codes for special game content and to download his CWCville track so that he could acquire yet another trophy. 26 July saw yet another Twitter update whining for downloads and positive reviews. |
| [[Image:CWCvsIanGuitar.jpg|thumb|left|The REAL Chris is not only cute, he can play the guitar!]]
| |
| There are several theories as to why there are two Christian Weston Chandlers who both claim to be the creator of the Sonichu series, and why one Chris-chan seems to be better than the other. Some of these theories include:
| |
| * '''The Ian Brandon Anderson hypothesis''' - the so-called "[[Real Chris]]" who goes by ''[[IBAChandler]]'' on [[YouTube]] is really an impostor named [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] (hence IBA) who is a professional [[troll]] dedicated to impersonating Chris. The fact that the impostor calls himself a "[[gaybian]]" seems to suggest that he wasn't actually saying that he was a "gay lesbian", but "gay-be-ian" as in "Gay be Ian", or "My name is Ian and I am a homosexual."
| |
| * '''Government experiment''' - some argue that [[Metal Gear Solid|Liquid and Solid Chris]] were a result of a government experiment, similar to the popular comedy movie ''Twins'' where Liquid was created to be an Übermensch (though Cherry Cola may have caused some of the defects such as idiosyncratic behavior {{cite}}) while Solid inherited all the recessive genes.
| |
| * '''Alternate timeline''' - some argue that Liquid Chris is from an alternate timeline where Chris was not coddled by his parents and managed to do something with his life.
| |
| [[Image:Torture.jpg|thumb|Liquid Chris torturing the imposter]] | |
| * '''IBA is a different person''' - both Christian Weston Chandlers have been coexisting for years, both ironically creating the same exact character and storyline of Sonichu. Ian Brandon Anderson is a completely separate person from Solid Chris who merely looks a lot like him, and Liquid Chris has been mistaking him for Ian Brandon Anderson the entire time. Solid Chris does not know that he is the only one who can save Liquid Chris from the real IBA's evil clutches.
| |
| * '''Parallel dimension''' - similar to the alternate timeline argument, some suggest that Liquid Chris comes from a parallel dimension where his parents were not coddled and a dimension where copyright laws as we know them do not exist and combinations of original characters are created as works of pure genius.
| |
| * '''Physical Manifestation of Chris's Shadow''' - According to Jungian psychology, the shadow is the opposite of the self-image, often containing qualities that the ego does not identify with but possesses nonetheless. Solid and Liquid Chris are one and the same person but with different personality traits. Somehow, while the method is unknown, the Liquid Chris personality was extracted from Solid Chris into a physical form containing all the opposites in Solid Chris's personality (read: the good ones).
| |
| *'''Alien''' Liquid Chris came to earth on a comet, where upon landing, he transformed his body into a perfected version of the human form. Knowing he had to assimilate into our society, he sought to replace the one being who would never be missed.
| |
|
| |
|
| ==Drama with Chris==
| | He also posted multiple threads on the forums at [[GameFAQs]] and Gamespot making similar demands. When his initial beg-a-thons were deleted because of those boards' anti-soliciting policies, Chris, being Chris, just went ahead and posted them again. |
| [[Image:Cestnepas.jpg|thumb|right|Ceci n'est pas une Chris]] | |
| In all seriousness, [[CWC]] has further demonstrated his total inability to understand satire and [[parody]]. Recently, [[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts | two]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 22nd, 2009 | videos]] vehemently defending his claim that he is the original creator of [[Sonichu]] (Whoop-de-fucking-doo). CChanSonichuCWC has fired back with much more coherent, well-made videos, gathering him a cult of fans on [[YouTube]].
| |
|
| |
|
| [http://www.youtube.com/v/OX1wo9FQ_SA&hl=en&fs=1& Behold.] | | Despite having all the free time in the world, Chris is mediocre at ''ModNation Racers''. This should come as little of a [[Soul Calibur|surprise]]. After racing in 500-plus contests, Chris has only "won" 100 of these (with a noticeable "Disconnected" and "Did Not Finish" tally indicating some [[Rage|tard-rage]] present). |
|
| |
|
| On [[July 2009|July 26th, 2009]], Solid Chris posted the following on one of CChanSonichu's videos:
| | ==Beta screen caps== |
| | |
| ;The Final Showdown
| |
| | |
| Hey, DUMBASS! YOU WISH YOU WERE ME! I would say YOU are Stuck... IN MINUS-SECOND-GEAR!
| |
| | |
| I am Calling YOU OUT!
| |
| | |
| 14 Branchland Ct. Ruckersville, VA
| |
| BEFORE August 2, 2009.
| |
| If you really WANT to be me, then Come Face Me.
| |
| | |
| oh, BTW, YOUR NASAL VOICE IS MORE GRATING THAN THE WORD "NAIVE", and METAL NAILS ON THE CHALKBOARD.
| |
| | |
| But "Naive" is even WORSE than NAILS.
| |
| | |
| You are a Nerd and a Whimp!
| |
| | |
| Have a good day.<br>
| |
| Christopher Christian Weston Chandler
| |
| | |
| ==Irony== | |
| [[Image:CChanSonichuCWC.jpg|thumb|If you look hard, you can see the TRUE, HONEST Sonichu medallion.]]
| |
| IBAChandler has mocked the CChanSonichuCWC on several points:
| |
| | |
| * [[Speech Impediment|His nasal tone]].
| |
| | |
| * [[Chris and fashion|His brown striped shirt]].
| |
| | |
| * [[Chris and Money|Actually making money off Sonichu]].
| |
| | |
| * [[Fat|His appearance]].
| |
| | |
| It's a bad sign when one is fighting a mirror, [[Fail|and the mirror is winning.]]
| |
| | |
| In early August 2009<ref>Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009</ref>, Solid started to believe that Liquid can't be the real Chris because only the real Christian Weston Chandler is a retard who is the laughing stock of the Internet. Therefore, the fact that Liquid isn't trolled and doesn't do dumb shit suggests that he isn't the real Chris. Of course, previously mentioned theories seem to disprove this assertion.
| |
| | |
| In a further fit of irony, Ian ends up impersonating Liquid in a bizarre attempt to woo Liquid's girlfriend, [[Kacey]].
| |
| | |
| == Challenges ==
| |
| [[Image:LadiesLoveLiquid.jpg|thumb|right|ALL THE LADIES (and [[BlueSpike|trolls pretending to be ladies]]) LOVE LIQUID!]]
| |
| CChanSonichuCWC has been challenged by CWC on two separate occasions. The first time, Chris challenged him in broken Spanish to respond to his video in Spanish as well, since the real CWC can "speak" Spanish in this [[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_July_29th%2C_2009#Transcript|video]]. CChanSonichuCWC did so not only in Spanish but also in French, German, and Japanese [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYAAc9zAVQw&eurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fuser%2FCChanSonichuCWC&feature=player_profilepage here] . The second time, Chris challenged him to a [[SingStar_Challenge|karaoke]] competition.
| |
| | |
| == Showdown ==
| |
|
| |
|
| <center> | | <center> |
| {{#ev:youtube|bmGkTFFczjY}}
| | <gallery> |
| | Image:MODNATION.JPG|Modnation Chris, about to go snake hunting. |
| | Image:MODNATION_1.JPG|Sonichu license plate |
| | Image:MODNATION_2.JPG|''Modnation'': the game that lets you make Sonichu [[medallions]] |
| | Image:MODNATION_19.JPG|Chris plows his car into an orange pylon |
| | </gallery> |
| </center> | | </center> |
|
| |
|
| Chris had a telephone exchange with CChanSonichuCWC in which he threatens to arrest him for identity theft and involve [[Bob]] in this debacle.
| | ==Post-Beta creations== |
|
| |
|
| ===Transcript===
| | It's now generally accepted that if you give Chris a character creation tool, he'll make himself and then Sonichu. ''ModNation Racers'' is no exception. The cars Chris has created actually contain a few relatively faithful replicas of real cars. Inside sources report that this isn't Chris taking an interest in cars, but Chris taking regaining his once-thought-lost interest in ''Hot Wheels'' toys. How very mature. |
| IBA: Hello?
| |
|
| |
|
| CWC: Hello Ian. Yeah I think you know who this is.
| | {{collapsible |
| | |Chris's ModNation Creations |
| | |<gallery perrow="5"> |
| | File:Modnation ChrisChan.jpg|Chris |
| | File:Modnation Sonichu.jpg|[[Sonichu]] |
| | File:Modnation Rosechu.jpg|[[Rosechu]] |
| | File:Modnation LegoChrisChan.jpg|[[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Lego Chris]] |
| | File:Modnation LegoInfomaniac.jpg|[[Legos|The Infomaniac]] |
| | File:Modnation 1stTransformersRacer.jpg|[[Transformers|A "Transformer"]] |
| | File:Modnation ExcelExcel.jpg|[[Excel Saga|Excel]] |
| | File:Modnation HayattHatchan.jpg|[[Excel Saga|Hyatt]] |
| | File:ModNation Wild.jpg| [[Wild Sonichu]] |
| | File:ModNation Punchy.jpg| [[Punchy Sonichu]] |
| | File:ModNation MagiChan.jpg| [[Magi-Chan]] |
| | File:ModNation Bubbles.jpg| [[Bubbles Rosechu]] |
| | File:ModNation Angelica.jpg| [[Angelica]] |
| | File:Modnation SonichuKart.jpg|A car for Sonichu |
| | File:Modnation RosechusKart.jpg|And Rosechu too! |
| | File:Modnation AutobotSon-Chu.jpg|[[Son-Chu]] |
| | File:Modnation 1991CamaroZ-28.jpg|Hot Wheels |
| | File:Modnation JaguarXj220Revealers.jpg|More Hot Wheels |
| | File:Modnation Zr1CorvetteRevealers.jpg|Still more Hot Wheels |
| | File:Modnation PontiacBanshee.jpg|You get the idea |
| | File:Modnation AMansToy.jpg|[[Homo]]wagon? |
| | File:Modnation 1stTransformerRaceCar.jpg|Transformation not included |
| | File:Modnation Wiimote.jpg|[[Chris and death|<s>A casket</s>]] Nintendo Wiimote |
| | File:ModNation AuNatured.jpg| Au "Naturel" |
| | </gallery>}} |
|
| |
|
| IBA: Look Christian, stop this.
| | ==See also== |
|
| |
|
| CWC: Look, you are giving me a lot of stress right now and I am not going to handle it.
| | *[[Fan:Sonichu Racers]] |
| | |
| IBA: (sighs) Look, Chris, listen, I was kind enough to accept the fact that you are actually a Christian W. Chandler, but you were…
| |
| | |
| CWC: No! My name, my name is Christian Weston Chandler.
| |
| | |
| IBA: All right fine, your name is Christian Weston Chandler. But the fact is, you were born with that name; you are not the Christian Weston Chandler that was born as Christopher Weston Chandler, who’s the original creator of Sonichu and Rosechu.
| |
| | |
| CWC: No, no, no.
| |
| | |
| IBA: I’ve asked you nicely to please stop pretending, for the sake of [[Kacey]]. She really cares about you.
| |
| | |
| CWC: I am not pretending anything. And you need to stop slandering me with your lies on the YouTube.
| |
| | |
| IBA: Look, I don’t know what the heck is wrong with your head, but you know and I know, my parents know, Kacey knows, the whole world knows that you are not Christopher Christian Ricardo Weston Chandler.
| |
| | |
| CWC: Hold on! Well... well then the whole world must be slandering against me, because I don’t think that’s very true. Because my fan base, if you took a look at my YouTube, you take a look at my YouTube video, you see that my fanbase has left me comments of support. And I’ve taken a look at your YouTube video and you and I see that they are all calling you out.
| |
| | |
| IBA: Look, Chris please, don’t do this. You’re breaking my balls here. Stop doing this. Stop playing this game. Quite pretending. Please come clean. Stop it.
| |
| | |
| CWC: I am not pretending... Mmmm. You are really ticking me off right now. Mmm.
| |
| | |
| IBA: Look, we’re both ticking each other off, but let's…
| |
| | |
| CWC: You keep making up; all these things, I mean whatever, you know, AND right now, you’re making that up right now.
| |
| | |
| IBA: Making what up?
| |
| | |
| CWC: You're just making that up off the top of your head, because your name is not Christian Weston Chandler, it is Ian Brandon Anderson, and you are grinding my gears.
| |
| | |
| IBA: No, no, listen, I'll spell it out for you; I came up with I - B - A - Chandler as in ''I'' being myself, ''B'' as in specifying what I am, ''A'' as in singular, and ''Chandler'' being my last name. There is no such thing as Ian Brandon Anderson.
| |
| | |
| CWC: No, because I found it out, your Ian Brandon Anderson name, the reason you a... you added Chandler to that is because you were paying tribute to the serial killer ''[[Wikipedia:Oba Chandler|Oba Chandler]]''.
| |
| | |
| (Ian and his parents talk in the background.)
| |
| | |
| IBA: Are you still there?
| |
| | |
| CWC: Yeah, I'm still here. What do you want to talk about?
| |
| | |
| (Ian and his parents talk in the background more.)
| |
| | |
| IBA (background): I'm not going to let this go, he's *inaudible* around with me in real life.
| |
| | |
| (Bob talks in the background.)
| |
| | |
| IBA (background): He's continuing to call me this ''Ian Brandon Anderson'' that somebody made up.
| |
| | |
| (Bob talks in the background some more.)
| |
| | |
| IBA: Look, Chris, stop it, stop this game, you know...
| |
| | |
| CWC: I am not playing a game, I have... I have not... I have been... I have been being true and honest this entire time, and you have been playing a dirty game.
| |
| | |
| IBA: Look, stop... No, no, no, no, I am not playing a game, I am being the true... I am true honest voice of reason here, I am the true honest one here. I am the original true creator of Sonichu and [[Rosechu]] and the world of [[CWCville]]- (gets cut off)
| |
| | |
| CWC: No, no, no, that was me.
| |
| | |
| IBA: You're just... No, no, no, no. (gets cut off by CWC) You have never been to Manchester High School, you have never been to [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]], you are taking the same class as Kacey is, over at community college in Washington DC.
| |
| | |
| CWC: No I am not, I don't even live in the Washington DC.
| |
| | |
| IBA: You ''are'' in DC, I know it, she knows it, we all know it, now stop it, if you don't (gets cut off by CWC) If you don't (gets cut off again) If you do not come clean right now, I am going to get my father in on this further, and you are going to get fucking arrested, thrown in jail, and you will not get to live the peaceful, happy life that Kacey and I would like (voice cracks) you to live because Kacey really cares for you MAN!
| |
| | |
| CWC: That's not true, I am ''[[honor roll]]''! I am honor roll, and you... you have just been... (trademark groan) And you know what? How would you... when would you even, you know, you keep making all these threats with the police and (gets cut off)
| |
| | |
| IBA: I am not making any threats (gets cut off), everything I tell you is ''true'', ''honest'', and ''legit'', you are the one- (gets cut off)
| |
| | |
| CWC: No, you are being, you were being, you are not being true and you are ''not'' being honest.
| |
| | |
| IBA: Okay, this is it. I have gave you the last warning, I gave you the last response, you just busting my balls again, ''you're going to jail'', I'm sorry Kacey.
| |
| | |
| == The End ==
| |
| | |
| At the end of the competition, CChanSonichuCWC won the [[SingStar Challenge]]. He had a tally of 4 votes in favor, 2 against. After showing the viewers that he was the true and best Christian Weston Chandler, he decided to "grow up". Having found a true sweetheart, ([[Kacey]]); a job (Production Manager and Game Designer at Microsoft for a Sonichu game for all consoles); commercial (Dark Horse Comics publishing his [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu comics]]) and financial success (the opening of the CWCStore); he decided to stop battling the [[Chris|slanderous impostor]] move out of his parent's house to live in Redmond, Seattle and continue with his happy, successful life.
| |
| | |
| <center>
| |
| {{#ev:youtube|B6Q1yFXgdoQ}}
| |
| </center>
| |
| | |
| At the end Ian Brandon Anderson couldn't take it, and after his [[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!|last video]] the fate of CChanSonichuCWC was revealed. Viewer discretion is advised, as the next video is disturbing.
| |
| | |
| <center>
| |
| {{#ev:youtube|RdshGz_Pvks}}
| |
| </center>
| |
| | |
| What happened next is unknown, but one thing is clear: '''IAN BRANDON ANDERSON HAS KIDNAPPED OUR BELOVED CHRIS.'''
| |
| | |
| | |
| Chris's sweetheart, [[Kacey]], was distraught over the event and posted a video confirming Chris's disappearance and announcing her withdrawal from their engagement.
| |
| | |
| <center>
| |
| {{#ev:youtube|K9kIcTdeqYU}}
| |
| </center>
| |
| | |
| ==The Return of the King==
| |
| Chris, not one to give up easily, triumphantly returned to the Internet on 15 [[October 2009]] with a new video explaining the trials and tribulations of the past few months:
| |
| | |
| <center>
| |
| {{#ev:youtube|Tn7WNTxCDck}}
| |
| </center>
| |
| | |
| | |
| Since his return, Chris has been caught up in a heated love triangle, with Ian desperately trying to steal Chris' sweetheart, [[Kacey]]. In the [[Greetings to Kacey's folks|video]] adressed to Kacey's parents, Ian called him "'''the previous Chris'''". In a [[11052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You|desperate video for Kacey]], Ian called him the "'''other Chris'''" repeatedly.
| |
| | |
| When the dust had settle, Ian had [[Father Call|offended Kacey's father]] and, through his immaturity, pushed Kacey back into the loving arms of the Real Chris.
| |
| | |
| == In the Comics ==
| |
| [[Image:Furryiba.jpg|thumb|Go, [[IBAChandler]], and copycatly sieze to the extreme!]]
| |
| | |
| <s>On November 17, 2009, the TRUE and ORIGINAL Chris-chan made his very first appearance in Ian's [[Sonichu (comic)|shitty ripoff comic]]. Ian, being the butthurt idiot he is, actually had the nerve to imply that the real Chris's name was, in fact, Ian Brandon Anderson, and again tried to convince everyone that he was the original creator of Sonichu. This only proves how far that slanderous impostor will go to feed his delusions of grandeur.</s>
| |
| | |
| Of course, since the comic is made by the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler, he would obviously cast the impostor in the comic and call him by his real name. Chris shows much more restraint for Ian than was shown him in [[Sonichu Special 4|Ian's sick parody]].
| |
| | |
| ==See also==
| |
| *[[Robert Simmons V]] - an inverse of Liquid: someone exactly like Chris but who wants to be Chris's friend.
| |
|
| |
|
| == External links == | | ==External links== |
| *[http://www.youtube.com/cchansonichucwc CChanSonichuCWC YouTube account]
| |
| *[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/The_Real_Chris_Chan ED article on The Real Chris Chan]
| |
| *[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ayObshLZQwI CWC vs. CWC (part 1 out of 3)]
| |
|
| |
|
| <br>{{SingStarChallenge}}
| | *[http://community.modnation.com/en-us/players/Sonichu Chris's ModNation profile] |
| {{Template:The_Cwcivil_War_of_2009}}
| |
|
| |
|
| [[Category:Trolls]] | | [[Category:Video Games]] |
