Difference between revisions of "Chris Sex Videos"

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This is the same room where Chris was later [[Bob Walks In|caught]] mass debating.
This is the same room where Chris was later [[Bob Walks In|caught]] mass debating.


==Chrischan the Elephant==
==Chris Chan the Elephant==


{{Infobox/video
{{Infobox/video
| name          = Chrischan the Elephant
| name          = Chris Chan the Elephant
| video          = {{#ev:youtube|Q-qFR5AyYMs}}
| video          = {{#ev:youtube|Q-qFR5AyYMs}}
| stardate      = 25 [[September 2008]]
| stardate      = 25 [[September 2008]]
Line 19: Line 19:
| other          = {{Leaked|text}}
| other          = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous      = [[Chris_Chan_Update_24_September_2008#Video|Chris Chan Update September 24, 2008]]
| previous      = [[Chris_Chan_Update_24_September_2008#Video|Chris Chan Update September 24, 2008]]
| next          = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chrischan_the_Chicken|Chrischan the Chicken]]
| next          = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chris_Chan_the_Chicken|Chris Chan the Chicken]]
}}
}}
=== Transcript ===
=== Transcript ===
Line 25: Line 25:
Chris makes a terrifying, bug-eyed face at the computer screen and shakes his head. He then turns to the side, puts his curved hand up to his mouth, and bangs his head back and forth.
Chris makes a terrifying, bug-eyed face at the computer screen and shakes his head. He then turns to the side, puts his curved hand up to his mouth, and bangs his head back and forth.


==Chrischan the Chicken==
==Chris Chan the Chicken==


{{Infobox/video
{{Infobox/video
| name          = Chrischan the Chicken
| name          = Chris Chan the Chicken
| video          = {{#ev:youtube|Yx3lGNvDZi0}}
| video          = {{#ev:youtube|Yx3lGNvDZi0}}
| stardate      = 25 [[September 2008]]
| stardate      = 25 [[September 2008]]
Line 36: Line 36:
| shirt          = {{GreenWhiteStripe|text}}
| shirt          = {{GreenWhiteStripe|text}}
| other          = {{Leaked|text}}
| other          = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous      = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chrischan_the_Elephant|Chris-Chan the Elephant]]
| previous      = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chris_Chan_the_Elephant|Chris Chan the Elephant]]
| next          = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chrischan_Undressing|Chrischan Undressing]]
| next          = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chris_Chan_the_Monkey|Chris Chan the Monkey]]
}}
}}


Line 44: Line 44:
Chris stands, and repositions the webcam to better show off his body. He is smiling. He puts his arms near his nipples and begins flapping his arms, mimicking a bird. He opens his mouth in a pained, silent scream and rears his head back. He sits down at the computer and repositions the webcam once again, smug and contented.
Chris stands, and repositions the webcam to better show off his body. He is smiling. He puts his arms near his nipples and begins flapping his arms, mimicking a bird. He opens his mouth in a pained, silent scream and rears his head back. He sits down at the computer and repositions the webcam once again, smug and contented.


==Chrischan Undressing==
==Chris Chan the Monkey==


{{Infobox/video
{{Infobox/video
| name          = Chrischan Undressing
| name          = Chris Chan the Monkey
| video          = {{#ev:youtube|v5f8QT24sKg}}
| stardate      = 25 [[September 2008]]
| subject        = {{Sex|text}}, {{Galpals|text}}
| style          = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga          = {{Panda|text}}
| shirt          = {{GreenWhiteStripe|text}}
| other          = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous      = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chrischan_the_Chicken|Chris Chan the Chicken]]
| next          = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chrischan_Undressing|Chris Chan Undressing]]
}}
 
 
 
 
==Chris Chan Undressing==
 
{{Infobox/video
| name          = Chris Chan Undressing
| video          = {{#ev:youtube|4AbZCCS5w28}}
| video          = {{#ev:youtube|4AbZCCS5w28}}
| stardate      = 25 [[September 2008]]
| stardate      = 25 [[September 2008]]
Line 55: Line 73:
| shirt          = {{GreenWhiteStripe|text}}
| shirt          = {{GreenWhiteStripe|text}}
| other          = {{Leaked|text}}
| other          = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous      = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chrischan_the_Chicken|Chrischan the Chicken]]
| previous      = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chris_Chan_the_Chicken|Chris Chan the Chicken]]
| next          = [[We're_Being_Watched#Video|Chris Chan Aeon Flux 100408]]
| next          = [[We're_Being_Watched#Video|Chris Chan Aeon Flux 100408]]
}}
}}

Revision as of 03:55, 29 April 2015

HonestContent.jpg
This article is rated M for Honest Content

It may contain content deemed not safe for work. Reader discretion is advised.

On 25 September 2008, Chris recorded himself making sex videos. They involved him making disturbing animal impressions, disrobing, and then finally mass debating and jizzing navy into a clear plastic cup. Chris was apparently chatting with then-future heartsweet PandaHalo while gratifying himself in his parents' kitchen. These videos were recorded near the height of Chris's relationship with Blanca, almost a month before she officially broke up with him and only four days before Chris sent her a letter pledging his undying love.

The background for the videos is the Chandler family kitchen, which is piled high with junk. This is also where the family PC is located. The short video clips were taken with a webcam and are completely silent, adding to the overall sense of terror.

This is the same room where Chris was later caught mass debating.

Chris Chan the Elephant

Chris Chan the Elephant
Search for video YouTube, archive
Stardate 25 September 2008
Subject Matter SexSex Sex, GalpalsGalpals Gal Pals
Performance Style CrazyCrazy Crazy
Saga PandaPanda Panda
Shirt Green White StripeGreen White Stripe The Shamrock Stripes
Other LeakedLeaked Leaked
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
previous
Chris Chan Update September 24, 2008
next
Chris Chan the Chicken

Transcript

Chris makes a terrifying, bug-eyed face at the computer screen and shakes his head. He then turns to the side, puts his curved hand up to his mouth, and bangs his head back and forth.

Chris Chan the Chicken

Chris Chan the Chicken
Search for video YouTube, archive
Stardate 25 September 2008
Subject Matter SexSex Sex, GalpalsGalpals Gal Pals
Performance Style CrazyCrazy Crazy
Saga PandaPanda Panda
Shirt Green White StripeGreen White Stripe The Shamrock Stripes
Other LeakedLeaked Leaked
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
previous
Chris Chan the Elephant
next
Chris Chan the Monkey


Transcript

Chris stands, and repositions the webcam to better show off his body. He is smiling. He puts his arms near his nipples and begins flapping his arms, mimicking a bird. He opens his mouth in a pained, silent scream and rears his head back. He sits down at the computer and repositions the webcam once again, smug and contented.

Chris Chan the Monkey

Chris Chan the Monkey
Search for video YouTube, archive
Stardate 25 September 2008
Subject Matter SexSex Sex, GalpalsGalpals Gal Pals
Performance Style CrazyCrazy Crazy
Saga PandaPanda Panda
Shirt Green White StripeGreen White Stripe The Shamrock Stripes
Other LeakedLeaked Leaked
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
previous
Chris Chan the Chicken
next
Chris Chan Undressing



Chris Chan Undressing

Chris Chan Undressing
Search for video YouTube, archive
Stardate 25 September 2008
Subject Matter SexSex Sex, GalpalsGalpals Gal Pals
Performance Style CrazyCrazy Crazy
Saga PandaPanda Panda
Shirt Green White StripeGreen White Stripe The Shamrock Stripes
Other LeakedLeaked Leaked
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
previous
Chris Chan the Chicken
next
Chris Chan Aeon Flux 100408


Transcript

Chris smiles a disturbing smile and types on the keyboard. He then suddenly pulls up his green polo shirt, revealing a separate, red T-shirt underneath — the sleeves of the red shirt are clearly visible — although the bottom of the red T-shirt stops just below his large, flabby breasts, forming a kind of improvised sports bra. The red shirt is apparently tight enough to function as a support garment, and may have belonged to Chris when he was a young child.

Chris unbuttons and struggles with his ill-fitting green polo shirt, grimacing with effort, eventually pulling it over his head. The red shirt comes off with it. Chris, shirtless and wearing a Sonichu medallion, repositions himself on the chair. He smiles a creepy, forced smile.

Long.mp4

Nownownownownow.jpg
THAT IS MY VIDEO

This video has been removed from YouTube and/or elsewhere by Jerkops, and requires immediate replacement.
Chris jerks off in his own kitchen, making it even less sanitary than usual. Also: animal impersonations.

The webcam is positioned below Chris's testicles. They are shaved, as is his entire pubic area. Chris strokes his erect pickle with his left hand, and seems to use his middle and ring finger to do most of the work. His index finger appears to be pressing into his middle finger to provide extra force. This is oddly similar to how he holds a pencil.

Chris's manboobs jut out from his body alarmingly at this angle, like tiny mountains. Chris looks off camera, presumably at the computer monitor.

(This file is included in the .zip downloadable here)

Jizz.flv

Nownownownownow.jpg
THAT IS MY VIDEO

This video has been removed from YouTube and/or elsewhere by Jerkops, and requires immediate replacement.

Chris strokes his erect duck with his right hand. His flabby torso and disproportionately large nipples are the only other things in the frame. His skin is an odd, inhuman tone, much like the inside of a McDonald's french fry viewed under fluorescent lighting. This is possibly due to a glow from a computer monitor, or some kind of unholy aura Chris emits while ejaculating.

A wild fapcup appears. Chris positions it below the head of his penis. Chris's DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS come into the frame. They are gray with filth, although no actual fecal matter is visible. Chris begins jizzing and catching his navy in the small cup, which appears to be slightly wider than the head of his penis. Chris lets go of his penis. His glans appears to be swollen to the size of a chicken egg, possibly due to the penile fracture that put a bend in his penis, or his retarded death-grip, or both. Either way, it is out of proportion to the shaft.

Chris appears to fumble with the cup off camera. His penis is in full view, limply resting against his briefs but still apparently engorged. An orange object flashes past, and he leaves the frame to do who knows what.

(This file is included in the .zip downloadable here)

See also

External links

Chris Chan Update 24 September 2008 Chris's videos We're Being Watched