Difference between revisions of "Chris's Letter to Blanca"
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[[Category:Historical Documents]] | [[Category:Historical Documents]] |
Revision as of 22:03, 8 January 2010
On 29 September 2008, Chris sent a package to his sweetheart Blanca Weiss. In it he enclosed his medallions, as well as a heartfelt love letter expressing his devotion to the woman he believed would be his lifelong companion and the mother of his prophesied child.
A few weeks later, his medallion was in a pickle jar and Blanca had unmercifully dumped him.
Background
The letter represents the peak of Chris's infatuation with Blanca. While their relationship had been through many ups and downs over the previous two months -- partly due to the interference of trolls like Lordsillynipples, partly due to Chris's attention wandering towards other would-be sweethearts -- at this point Chris believed beyond all doubt that Blanca was real and that she had made plans to come to Charlottesville and meet him some time in the next month.
The preceding night, Chris had a dream about meeting Blanca, which he interpreted as their relationship receiving the indelible GodJesus seal of approval. That's the dream that the cartoon Chris is experiencing at the bottom of the letter (described in more detail in his e-mail to Blanca, also sent on 29 September). Likewise, "Ami B-Chan" is a (sickening weeaboo) pet name Chris coined for Blanca during their e-mail correspondence.
The letter
Dear Blanca,
I am soo happy that you were revealed as my True, Honest Sweetheart-To-Be; in the dream I have ANXIOUSLY AWAITED FOR since the dreams of me and my future daughter. When before, my heart was lost and confused; NOW I TRULY SEE THE PATH TO TRUE, HONEST LOVE set for me by God and Jesus [.] I now can TRULY HARDLY WAIT TO MEET YOU around Halloween. If you make it beforehand, we can dress up and go to a local Halloween Party [.] I will make a pority to find for us to go to. How fun! My heart is TRULY SET; I will wait for you, my Guiding Light Ami B-Chan [smiley face in style of "^_^"]
Also to Blanca's Grandmother and Aunt, in Illinois, who will receive this package for her; Please Make it TOP PRIORITY TO Have it ready to give to her when she arrives to visit y'all soon.
Peace,
[Three hearts with arrow through them]
[Image with caption "The Morning of September 28, 2008" with "*HAND TO GOD*" in the left margin, Chris is in bed, sleeping, fully clothed, wearing his fucking medallion. He has a dream bubble with Chris sitting in a relaxed pose, with the caption "WAITIN' AT THE HOTEL FOR MY SWEET BLANCA 'AMI B-CHAN' WEISS! *In a Local Hotel" and Chris imagining one of their AIM conversations with "I LOVE YOU" written at the bottom with several hearts.]
Aftermath
The primary trolls behind the Blanca identity received the letter and medallions on 9 October, letting the world know not long afterwards. Chris refused to believe that his sweetheart had betrayed him, though, and in fact the supposed theft of the package seems to have had little effect on him at first. He spent most of the second and third weeks of October focusing on the LittleBigPlanet beta and the newfound threat represented by Jimmy Hill.
On 20 October, however, Blanca officially dumped him, supposedly over some of the images acquired and leaked by Lordsillynipples. The shock sent Chris crashing into slumber, as chronicled in the Captain's Log of 21 October.
Today, the letter is in possession of Krapple mod and CWCki editor Anonymous.
Gallery
See also
Blanca Saga | ||
The Players: | The Games: | The Prizes: |
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Coinciding Sagas: Jimmy Hill, PandaHalo |