User:SeventhBase

Ideas that surely hold importance somewhere

Find some of these poignant? There's the discussion tab!

• Chris seems to punctuate his sentences with "YAY!" to indicate his joy, in a manner typical of a retard and/or manchild. (Special Ed on Crank Yankers did this a lot). A search will confirm this. This has been noted several times, and this attribute creeps into his creations, notably his fiendish hellspawn. This mannerism should at least be on par with the Stress Sigh. Other candidates to document this include Slow-in-the-minds and Autism.
• The Random-Access Humor Quiz expects the player to know specific answers to complete non-sequiters without any sort of reference, i.e. read crap in Chris's head. In other words, it's not random AT ALL. Essentially, its purpose is self-defeating, but probably explained by an autistic mindset.
• The Seventeenth of March seems to hold some major significance for Chris, nearing February 24th in importance.
  • It is not only the birthday of Patti-chan (1988),
  • but also the creation date of the Sonichu character (2000),
  • as well as his canon birthday (1988 AGAIN),
  • Ivy's purported birthday (1992, but we all know why that's the case),
  • Sonichu's wedding anniversary with Rosechu (2006, most bafflingly, although it DOES coincide with the day Sonichu reaches legal age, but Rosechu remained underage),
  • and the day of the purchase of his Life Upgrade (2006 AGAIN).
  • It also happens to be the date that Chris was kicked out of Grace Baptist Church and transferred to Wesley Memorial (2008),
  • as well as the exact date he decided to threaten Tito (2010), although with that also being the 10th anniversary of Sonichu, it just might be coincidental.

Just how significant is this date? Has GodBear arranged the fates so that much fail surrounding Chris occurs on St. Patrick's Day? Or does Chris have some bizarre fixation on this date, like he does with the name "Reginald"? Or is this user just seeing patterns obsessively?

• We all know that Chris believes (or until some point believed) that his failworks exist on a plane parallel to our own, and does not realize that he himself is the only outlet for his characters' expressions. This is why he feels to inform us that shit already happened "off-screen". No, it's not a creative decision, it actually happened and we just need to be updated. This, of course, implies that Chris interacts with the characters on a daily basis and is constantly in contact with them. One could only shudder at the manchild speaking into thin air, asking an invisible Sonichu how his family is doing. Indicative of schizoid behavior, if anything. This has even more alarming implications when he plays the characters themselves in that grating squeaky voice. The horrorshow that is A Sonichu Day illustrates this in action, but the most telling example is in the tirade against Liquid, where Chris uses Rosechu's voice/persona to explain that she got married and had kids. One could not help but wonder if Chris actually believes Rosechu is saying these things as he vocalizes those words. If true, this could be a sign of dissociative identity disorder, where Chris at the moment believed he was Rosechu. In any case, any true and trained psychologist has a lot on his or her hands.

Alternatively, taking the Occam's Razor explanation (read: Chris is a retard), it could just be a case of childhood naiveté gone on for too long. Children play-act all the time, but only for fun, and can generally discern between their fantasy characters and real life.

• Chris has obvious gender identity issues. That has not gone around un-noticed by the trolldom, but has yet to receive a centralized article. The Crystal thing obviously opens big can of worms; she's supposed to be the "sister he's never had", but more likely she's Chris's curiosity over what would happen if he was born and/or raised a girl. In Issue 9, he makes a note after Sonichu's his tard-rage rant on dem homos that he "would rather suffer a painful gender-change operation than be a homo." The Gaybian thing also lends credence to this: He wants to identify as a woman attracted to women despite being sexed male. Combined with his latent homosexual tendencies, I can suspect that either he wants to become a woman to justify his attraction to men, or his suppressed identity is that of a heterosexual/bisexual woman, and once he transitions she will be able to love men as normal.
• We all like to ridicule Chris for being a pedofork despite tenuous evidence of this. But observing the only video that shows him having offense to child abuse, I can't help but wonder if he's actually disgusted by CP in and of itself, or is he taking more offense to:
  • His creations being portrayed contrary to his ideals
  • The personification furfagificaton of his ideals of childhood innocence doing not-so-innocent things, or
  • The idea of Sonichu as the perfect family man, and the idea of his nuclear family as the perfect familial experience being threatened

than any inherent revulsion to Loli-Shota-Guro. Keep in mind that his morality is NOT focused on the welfare of others, but the perfection of an ideal as espoused by television. If we are to assume the worst of Chris (which we ususally do anyway), then Sonichu committing Soneefuck is not AWWWWRIGHT because it involves subjecting sexuality to someone that cannot comprehend it (Remember, Chris himself is favor of sex ed for young children "because they'll end up seeing it anyway"), but because Sonichu is a good daddy like Desi Arnaz and Peter Griffin (apparently an obsession with Meg hasn't shown Chris that Peter constantly mistreats her) and would NEVER do that to his own kiddies.

• Why did Chris pair up Punchy with Layla, despite the former previously stating he had an attraction to Angelica? Most likely a spur-of-the-moment change, done to "symbolically" (assuming Chris is capable of parallelism) pair himself and Ivy together vicariously through their creations. Since Chris is unable to consummate his character's GodJesus-foretold relationship with Ivy due to being in the Time Void, he manages to do this indirectly by having Punchy perform some Far-Eastern lovin' on Layla. Of course, off-continuity, he manages to get his avatar and Ivy doing the (really fucking nasty) nasty anyway. Layla's fate after the Ivy saga scuttled is unknown. It's certainly possible that Chris will get Punchy to dump the bitch to reflect his "real-life" "falling-out" with Ivy. Or even more poetically, she will die in an elevator accident in a giant wall of text, but not before she craps out an egg that hatches into another ripoff of something that catches Chris's fancy.
• It's well-known that Chris fails completely and utterly at Show-don't-tell. All the sonichus and rosechus (ESPECIALLY the latter, oh GodBear) have almost nothing distinguishing them from each other, aside from faction/alignment (good vs. villain). All they have are "Informed Attributes", in which Chris says a character has such attributes but never backs it up with an example. The only things that can be discerned (with or without Chris confirming them outright) are:
  • Punchy is obsessed with Samurai Pizza Cats and other TV crap
  • Angelica loves using religious platitudes (not to be confused with actual religious devotion)
  • Magi-chan is serious and unconcerned with frivolity (he is never seen smiling or joking)
  • Jamsta is a totally cool and radical, dude! Cowabunga! (Although it isn't clear whether it is a radio persona or he really acts that retarded)
  • Christine is a self-absorbed and narcissistic (in the literal sense) bint who is seldom seen without a mirror and grooming herself
  • Post-Simonla, Wild is a vengeance-obsessed psycho who is even willing to exploit his own daughter to get his revenge
  • Post-Naitsirhc Black Sonichu's got a badboy image (warranted or otherwise) to maintain, despite his own unremarkable personality

See, this is simply from subtextual reading alone! I'd like to term several of these "accidental personality traits", as it seems unlikely that Chris intended to make most of these personality distinctions without stating them outright. Maybe we've underestimated Chris, and he's capable of showing some degree of Show-don't-tell after all.

Stupid questions I ask

• Who evolves first? I refer, of course to our favorite nuclear family larvae. Assuming that Chris doesn't want them hopelessly locked in childhood so he can re-live his playtime vicariously through them, he's got to show them grown up some time in the future, like he did with Metonic and Vamprosa. Some day, they've got to get out of those revulsion-inducing Sonee forms and become marginally less intolerable Sonic recolors. So who comes first?
  • Cerah, by virtue of her being the eldest
  • Christine, 'cause she's a super special shiny pwetty wosey as well as a Sue for Crystal
  • Robbie, because he's the boy and a Sue for Chris himself

(This assumes, of course, that Chris has any idea of character development, which we all know is one of the innumerable things he fails at. And yeah, this is just my curiosity at how Chris will design their evolved forms. They will no doubt be ugly and poorly designed.)

But j0's designs are pretty cool.

• Doesn't ANYONE have a copy of the Sonichu Fan Promos?!
• Does "Blangry" a portmanteau of "Black" and "Angry"?

Next major task(s)

• Redirect old CWCipedia links to the current archive.

Userboxes

JERK This user is a JERK and takes away all the girls.

STRAIGHT This user is STRAIGHT. and likes dykes & china. Unlike Chris, they don't mind da homos.

Asian This user is an Asian and loves random-access humor and martial arts!!

Martial Artist This user has a little Chun-Li in them!!

Jew This user is a JEW! Unlike Chris, the CWCki likes Jewish people. Mazel tov!

Americunt: This user is an Americunt and refuses to use unnecessary vowels. Uncle Sam would be proud!

Krapplefag This user regularly posts on /cwc/

Yawning Squirtle This user is a bonafide Squirtle, and as such is very fond of hash and the motherfucking moon.

Armchair Psychologist This user analyzes Chris's psyche WAAAY too much and should just accept that Chris is insane.

Observer This user is taking it Easy. They have followed Chris-Chan's movements, but hasn't contributed to the trolling efforts.