Valentines Day Hymn
Valentines Day Hymn is one of Chris's earliest shitty poems. He wrote it on Valentine's Day 2000 for his "Pokésite 2".
Text
Valentines Day Hymn.
2/14/2000
On the day of love and romance,
Hearts and cupids fly around.
The arrow of cupid hits a man,
And that man falls head over heels for a pretty gal.
Cards and candy go hand-to-hand,
Expressing the thoughts of love put in the poem.
Kisses are shared and fireworks are blown,
The only way that could happen is if they kissed on the 4th of July.
On a date, the man could not pay the bill,
So his date slammed her door in his face.
Red and Pink are the hearty colors,
Because that's how the hearts were originally drawn.
The man's coat over a puddle,
The maiden walks,
Then the man trips and pays the laundry bill.
Under the moonlight,
The couples of the world kiss,
But unfortunately for few,
They are interrupted by their parents.
Night is right for love,
Except for the werewolf...
Whoops!
Wrong holiday.
Happy Valentines Day to all lovers!
The cupids did a pretty good job,
Didn't they?
Spanish version
Chris wrote an alternate version for the Spanish version of the PokeSite, later put up on the CWCipedia[1].
With very minor exceptions (such as the last line, which literally translates to "Yes?" as opposed to "Didn't they"?), Chris opts for the literal school of translation, opting to translate word for word without regard to the original rhythm of the poem. Some English professors might argue that this is a sort of fail.
En el díy de amor y romance,
Corazónes y cupids volan alrededor.
La flecha de cupid choca un hombre,
Y esto hombre está enamorado por la señora bonita.
Tarjetas de amor y cande son juntos bien,
Expresan los pensamientos de amor en la poema.
Los Besos son partes y los fuegos artificales explotan,
Puede ocurrir solomente si ellos besan en el 4 de Julio.
En una cita, el hombre no puede pagar la cuenta,
Tan su novia cerra su puerta en su cara.
Rojo y Rosado son los colores del día de St. Valentin,
Porqué son los colores originales de los corazónes.
El abrigo del hombre cubre un charco,
La doncella camina,
Que el hombre baja y paga la cuenta para la ropa lavada.
En el luz de la luna, Las parejas del mundo besan,
Pero para menos, Tienen in interrupción desde sus padres.
La noche es bueno para amor,
Excepto el werewolf...
¡Hoy!
Falsa fiesta.
Feliz día de St. Valentin para todos están enamoros!
Los cupids hacen un trabajo bueno,
Sí?