PVCC NEW info: on Chris and Barbara spoon eachother!

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NOTE: Chris was not directly involved in this conversation.

PVCC NEW info: on Chris and Barbara spoon eachother! [sic] is a video uploaded to YouTube by The Man in the Pickle Suit on 4 October 2010. In it, Kim and another individual discuss Chris's spooning habits with his mother, Barbara Chandler. Kim also describes how Chris once had a wet dream about Barbara. Chris's dream is described as Barbara being an Egyptian belly dancer. Another detail is an incident when Chris, desperate to make Kim his sweetheart instead of just being a friend, asked if she would have sex with him if they were the last people on Earth; Kim said no, and then asked him if he would do so if it were his mom in that scenario, to which Chris hesitated greatly (probably out of discomfort, but as Kim notes he's done this a lot when he's about to lie) before saying he wouldn't.

New attention was brought to the audio during summer 2021, not long after Chris was arrested for engaging in incestuous acts with his own mother; many Christorians have noted how disturbing this recording is in hindsight.

Audio

PVCC NEW info: on Chris and Barbara spoon eachother!
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Stardate	4 October 2010

Transcript

Kim: [I]t's recording.

Troll 1: Okay, here we go. Alright.

Kim: Alright, so, uh... so Chris, being Chris y'know, telling the truth all the time, he's admitted that him and his mother "spoon" on his bed frequently.

Troll 1: [mix of audible disgust and nervous laughter]

Troll 2: Oh, god.

Kim: And, uh... Chris has said also that he's had a dream about Barb. And, in this dream, Barb is an Egyptian belly dancer.

Troll 2: [audible gasp]

Troll 1: [Laughter] Oh no.

Troll 2: Keep going, keep going!

Troll 1: Okay, go, go.

Kim: Oh. At one point I had friend-zoned him, saying y'know, "Chris, we're only friends" and all that, "I would never sleep with you, I would never date you", yadda-yadda-yadda. He couldn't accept this so he asked me if, if me and him were the last people on earth, if I would sleep with him to repopulate the earth. [Skype new message sound] Of course I said no. And, uh, and so I decided - well "Chris, what if you and your mom were the last people on earth, would you sleep with her?" He got quiet, and then denied that he wouldn't, but whenever Chris pauses when you ask him a question it usually means he's thinking of a lie. [Long pause] And that's - that's all I can think of right now.

Troll 2: That's more than enough. Thank you.

Troll 1: [talking over Troll 2] Well, he, once upon a time, like the first call before he talks about the belly dancer and everyone, and to recite this again for prosperity moment, he said that he dreamed about sex with his mother and... nutted the bed.

Troll 3: Jesus Christ.

Kim: Oh yeah!

Troll 2: [audible laughter]

Troll 3: I uh, I quit the Internet.

Trolls: [audible laughter]

Troll 3: I am done trolling on YouTube, thank you, you've been a great...

Kim: [Interrupts troll 3]: I mean it ís... I mean it is, it is bad enough when he tells his mom when he's gonna, y'know, go mass debate, but, spooning on the bed.

Troll 3: Spooning.

Troll 1: [Doing a Chris impression] Mommy, be my Ivy pillow!

Troll 2: Who is, who is the little spoon and who is the big spoon?

Kim: [audible laughter]

Troll 1: Uh, he also tried uh, Y'know, m- more or less try to push the name 'Kimmi'.

Kim: Oh yeah, he went...

Troll 1: Yeah, the name of that love doll, and you said: fuck no! And you wonder where all that rage came from. 'Don't you fucking name me after that doll, asshole!'

Kim: I mean my real name is Kim, and, he was like, he sent me an E-mail asking if it was okay for him to call me Kimmi, and I was like nooo, definitely not, no.

Troll 1: [Doing a Chris impression] But could I name my mama's fat belly "Kimmi"?

Kim: [Giggles]

Troll 1: Okay back then, there used to be a character that he made, Logan, me, that pretty much countered and made sure that the friend-zone actually stayed. But in order to get more control of Chris we wanted to basically drop hi... drop me out of the picture so that way he felt more secure by telling more shit to Kim.

Troll 2: So basically you did exactly what Ricky and Blanca did?

Troll 1: Yes, that's where I pretty much got the whole strategy from... so yeah homage to you guys, right? So that was pretty much what we had to do right there because we wanted to protect Kim being just another fucking GF. Because that, Y'know, that, those were getting pretentious. Okay, you can stop recording, Finny.