26 December 2014

“	Ugh!!! I Fucking Hate These People for continuing to allow the damn blue arms to exist! And I fucking hate them for changing the arm colour in the first place and ultimately from that damn seed event, force me to be attacked, having to defend myself, and forcing me to spend a weekend in jail!	”
Chris's justification for his actions.

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26 December 2014 was a truly infamous day in Chris's life, and his most action-packed since he graduated high school. Essentially 28 October 2011 all over again, Chris was in trouble with the law once more for assaulting staff at a video game store, this time with pepper spray. The attack was the culmination of his months-long crusade to change the arm color of a cartoon hedgehog. Chris's fans wait with bated breath to see what, if any, punishment he will receive, and whether he will learn anything from it.

Synopsis

The now infamous photo of Chris, seconds before the assault.

Expert recreation of Chris's first night in the pokey.

By the time of his arrest, Chris had already been engaging in various local protest actions, including vandalism, to force merchants to stop selling Sonic Boom. He had been banned from every GameStop within driving distance of 14 Branchland Court. Nevertheless, on the day after Christmas, on a trip to Charlottesville Fashion Square with his mother, Chris visited the GameStop outlet. While he claimed it was to investigate some "Skylanders" merchandise, staff claimed he had committed acts of vandalism before, and they were on the lookout for him. Whatever the truth, he entered the store wearing a pair of purple My Little Pony-branded sunglasses designed for little girls, apparently as a disguise. After arguing with staff, he strode towards the store entrance, commanding the staff "Don't call anybody!" Just before he left, he brandished a pink can of pepper spray, and sprayed the assistant manager (or "Ass Manager", as Chris would later call him) James Herring. Herring was later confirmed to be unharmed, although he did leave work after the incident.

Most of the information on what happened in the next hour comes exclusively from leaked, low-quality audio from a police scanner, and details are uncertain. With his duty at GameStop done, and the police on their way, Chris returned to his car and left the mall. At some point after arriving at the mall and checking JCPenney and Sears, police determined that Chris had left the building around half an hour ago. The police talked with Barbara, who was still at the mall eating, which implies that he left his elderly mother behind, without a car to get home. Barb had little information to offer, except the make and color of Chris's car. Chris was arrested on the same day, either at home or en route.

On Sunday 28 December, a member of Kiwi Farms contacted Albemarle Regional Jail and confirmed that Chris was being held there, and was awaiting video court the next morning. A followup call from a 4chan troll revealed that Herring would be pressing charges. After his weekend in jail, Chris was charged with his Class 6 felony, posted the $2500 bail, and was released on recognizance.

monozettai's Account

The internet learned of the above drama when a Tumblr user named monozettai uploaded an on-the-scene video (below).. In the short clip, Chris, clad in full tomgirl regalia, throws away any pity points he may have earned by macing a man who is clearly not threatening Chris in any way. The clip became a minor viral hit, earning over 195,000 views as of 5 January 2015. It is one of the most-viewed videos in the CWChronology, next to Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes, CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!, THAT IS MY HOUSE, the FUTURE MESSAGE, and Madman Rising. Chris did nothing to get the video taken down, likely being aware of the Streisand effect.

After the video was discovered by Christorians at large on 27 December, many weens flooded monozettai's inbox with questions on his recollection of the event. This is what he had to say:

I was in Gamestop looking at the 3ds rack when I heard a racket from my left. I looked up and saw Chris surrounded by 3-4 employees in a corner (I recognized Chris’ voice before their appearance). A woman was telling Chris that they had been banned from the store and needed to leave, to which Chris responded with something like “Oh come ON, can’t we let bygones be bygones?” The employees ignored him and continued to tell him to leave and threatened to call security. Eventually they dispersed to do so, which is about when I began filming (I had been wondering whether or not I should, but I’d say only about 20 or so seconds had gone by between when I noticed and when I started filming). After the video I heard the employees complaining about the use of pepper spray. I didn’t notice it when I initially filmed nor was I ever in the vicinity of the spray, so I can’t confirm anything, but as you can see Chris sprayed something at an employee in the video. I don’t remember seeing that employee around after that so I assume he left. Anyway, a woman buying a game at the counter asked the employee she had been interacting with what had just happened and the employee replied that Chris was “some guy that came in from time to time to mess with the Sonic Boom games because he was upset that Sonic’s arms had changed color, ” or something to that effect. Sadly I did not check to see what happened to the Sonic Boom and only stayed for another 5 minutes or so before leaving, but nothing else of interest happened other than employees running back and forth from the counter to the back room, anxiously talking about contacting security and making sure “he” was gone.

Chris's Account

Oh, really?

“	I WAS the Victim	”
Chris, meeting everyone's expectations

Immediately after his release from the pokey, Chris rushed to his keyboard to perform damage control. Not surprisingly, he refused to admit any fault. Bizarrely, while he claimed ignorance to the effects of pepper spray, he also admitted that he had sprayed himself with the stuff several days before the incident. He also tried to blame the store employees for "intimidating" him, and Sega for changing Sonic's arm color in the first place. Unlike his previous run-in with the law, where he was at least smart enough to only mention the exact details in a personal e-mail to a close friend, Chris posted this to his Facebook page for all to see. Even his white knights condemned his actions. It seemed that this time around, everyone was against him.

Attention Everyone!!! To preface what has happened recently, I simply remind everyone that Sonic The Hedgehog's Arms Are Not Freaking Blue!!! If ‪#‎SEGA‬ had Never changed them, or reversed the change between February and November of this year in the new Sonic Boom video games AND Cartoon Series on Cartoon Network, as well as the Toys and whatever else, I would Never Have Had to Protest and Rebel the way I have, including the creation of my group, FIX SONIC'S ARMS IMMEDIATELY, SEGA!!! Within my groups, I have lead by example to push forward to the path of Waking SEGA Up and Forcing Them to Change Sonic's Arm Colour Back Immediately. And to confess, I HAVE DONE MY PART FOR REAL! I had personally gone into three of the four local GameStops (EXCLUDING the Fashion Square one) THREE TIMES to Personally Protest in my Silent Way. First Attack: I printed, as seen on the Facebook Group, the Fronts of the Sonic Boom Game Inserts, affixed double-sided tape onto the backs, and affixed them onto the fronts of their respective display game boxes on the shelves. Second Attack, about a week later: I checked the success of my first attack: damaged a few original inserts pretty well to full removal. And of what were still there, I made attempts to transfer the inserts from the original cases into Behind the inserts of different games. I've had to briefly explain my reasons and the Protest, and told them that they should NOT BE SELLING THE BLUE_ARM_BANDIT GAMES IN THE FIRST PLACE. AND THAT THEY SHOULD SEND ALL OF THEIR REMAINING STOCK OF SONIC BOOM GAMES AND STUFF BACK TO SEGA, TO MAKE THEM CHANGE SONIC'S ARM COLOUR BACK IMMEDIATELY!!! They did nothing. And one last week later, the Third and Final Attack, and the ONE and ONLY time that the Fashion Square Location had been involved as well. I made up and printed faux price tag decals, with the short note to discourage purchase of the Blue Arm Bandit games, and promote the Protesting Boycott. And with the Five Wii U software cases that each melted a bit from the MY House Fire Last January, as well as Five Smoke Damaged 3DS Game Cases (no melting), I had printed a full front, side and back insert with the boycott encouragements, and the notes on the back to make the stores send their remaining stock Back To SEGA! I Have ran into individuals giving me Bad Grief for my Protest and Actions, OUTSIDE from the Fashion Square Location, but I HAVE done my duty in full to the best of my abilities at the individual moments and circumstances. I also HAD Hidden ALL of the Blue Armed Sonic Toys at Toys R Us here, concealed hidden amongst their metal cupboards, so they ALL would NOT be SOLD, and Best Boycotted for The Protest! They remained hidden for the longest time of over a Month; found and reshelved near the 20th of December to my personal dismay and crestfall. And at Best Buy, ALL Copies of THEIR Sonic Boom Games are STILL SUCCESSFULLY CONCEALED AND HIDDEN from View AND Purchase! Anyhow, AFTER the Final Attack for the Protest, near a week later, on December 8, I had typed, signed, addressed and US Mailed apology letters, with the promise to have been done with my In Person Protest Deeds with No Further Action therein, to ALL but the Fashion Square GameStop, and I had sent one to Toys R Us as well. I had thought the FS GS would overlook the ONE attack of Protest on them, but obviously, I was mistaken. Which brings us up to now. Last Friday, the 26th, my mother and I were at the mall, getting pizza and spaghetti for lunch. She had informed me of a good Mini Refrigerator deal at Sears, so after eating, I made my way to check it out. NOTHING ELSE HAPPENED AT SEARS, and I went NOWHERE NEAR JCPENNY that day. There was a good 3.1 Cubic Foot Fridge for $129.99 that caught my eye, but that is to be purchased later. On the way to Sears, I peeked into the GameStop, and I spotted a New Skylander Figure: Blastermind. I was set to buy it, and I was going to consider checking out their Wii U Preowned Software selection in their 3 for 2 deal. Innocent; I was NOT Looking for Trouble. But then this MALE Loomed out in front of me, frightened the crap out of me, and he said in a BOOMING VOICE that ONLY scared me worse, "YOU ARE BANNED FROM HERE. YOU NEED TO LEAVE NOW." But still determined to continue my shopping, I veered into the Wii U direction, when his female accomplice startled me and boomed in as well. Still feeling frightened and mentally overloaded, I made a grab for my pepper spray to use In Defense. I offered a few Peaceful solutions, but she ended up sending him to go get security. So, I shouted, "Fine! I'm Leaving", and I dropped the figure. And on my way out, I told the MALE to Not Get Anyone, and we both stopped near simultaneous. I still felt my own worse from wear with the fear, startle, paranoia, and I did NOT want him following me and causing more trouble upon me. And then in my defense and to make my escape, I spritzed a miniscule amount of the pepper spray Downward; NOT into his face. And then I left. I did not learn until much later that the spritz had done a lot worse than I had imagined it would, as well as learning that they were the so-called "Manager" and "Ass Manager" of that particular store. I had No Idea of the contents of the Pepper Spray, OR that it was Illegal for use in certain situations in the state of Virginia at all. And, I HAD tried the stuff on myself days before in the upstairs bathroom. A Two Second Spray onto my left wrist, some of it got onto the bath tub wall as well. Like sampling a perfume or deodorant. It Took Me Out damn well. I had to open the windows, turn on the bathroom fan AND aim the box fan into the bathroom to air the place out, and I wiped the wall off as well, and OF COURSE I washed my hands. It took fifteen to thirty minutes to make it bearable in there again. In the end, Yes, I went along peacefully when the "Police" arrived to collect me, and I had to spend a miserable weekend in Jail. And I just got out on a bond and bail; yada, yada, yada. In the END, I WAS the Victim; I did not cause the original provoking; The "Assistant Manager" Made the First Attack ONTO ME and Provoked my defensive response. I was Minding My Own Business; NOT Looking for Trouble, and then HE Startled Me, similar to a potential Rapist in a Dark Alley in a big city. ANY of you would have done the same as I Have in Defense AND Escape! And we can SUE SEGA for Changing Sonic's Arm Colour and Ultimately, this MALE getting Pepper Sprayed! Think About It Seriously! And my Protest Actions are NOT acts of "Vandalism", regardless of your individual perceptions. It was NOT Vandalism, but Good Protest when in around 2004, At Fashion Square, I tried their NEW Soda machines with a credit-debit card slot, and then I learned of the FIVE DOLLAR SURCHARGE that brought my bank account into the Freaking Red! I subtly Posted Sticky Note Signs onto each machine shortly after, "This Machine Charges You Five Dollars per Card Use". A few days later, the Original Machines returned! Nobody gave ME Any Freaking Grief or Complaints at all about that! AND if you REALLY want to see the Whole Mess Happen, go find the Security Tape of the time of Point A, my finding Blastermind to Point B of my departure from the store. Now, if you will excuse me, I have a LOT of much required Packing to Take Care Of. Good Day.

The Charges

Chris's court records

This is the case against Chris, according to the Albermarle General District Court.

CHARGE: DANGEROUS GAS UNLAWFUL RELEASE (§ 18.2-312. Illegal use of tear gas, phosgene and other gases.) "If any person maliciously release or cause or procure to be released in any private home, place of business or place of public gathering any tear gas, mustard gas, phosgene gas or other noxious or nauseating gases or mixtures of chemicals designed to, and capable of, producing vile or injurious or nauseating odors or gases, and bodily injury results to any person from such gas or odor, the offending person shall be guilty of a Class 3 felony. "If such act be done unlawfully, but not maliciously, the offending person shall be guilty of a Class 6 felony."

For a Class 6 felony conviction, Virginia sentencing guidelines recommend 1-5 years in prison and a fine of up to $2,500, in addition to all the other corresponding losses he'd experience as a registered felon.

The 6th Degree version under the Virginia tear gas law is for cases in which the tear gassing was done "unlawfully, but not maliciously." Chris was fortunate to avoid the Class 3 felony version of the charge, which deals with malicious intent, and carries a much stiffer penalty of 5-20 years and up to a $100,000 fine. Chris may be allowed to plea down to misdemeanor-level assault and battery and be given a suspended sentence, with probation, counseling, anger management and/or community service in lieu of jail time.

Having squandered Bob's inheritance on hiring Rob Bell after the 28 October 2011, Chris has been forced this time around to work with a public defender.

Chris's mugshot. Note that killer pout, and lazy eye.

The Protests Continue

On 3 January 2015, an e-mail leaked onto Kiwi Farms exposed that Chris had behaved in a bellicose manner at Wal-Mart on that date, and threatened to use his mace. This was soon afterwards confirmed by Chris himself, who indicated that he wielded the pepper spray because it made him feel like a "badass." This statement worried many onlookers, as it suggests Chris perceived himself as invincible so long as he could issue credible threats. Was it possible that Chris's notion of his own infallibility and invulnerability, previously confined to the comics, had seeped into his conscious psyche?

On 11 January, Chris posted the following to his Facebook account, once again painting himself as the victim and wishing that people would like him, despite his past actions. He argued that nobody should be banned from a store unless they are carrying a gun.

Just Listen; Do Not Comment or Respond; I am being Very Serious. I Really Wish People would Positively Like Me. I can not make people like me, and if they dislike me, for their own individual reasons beyond my own comprehension. I can not change their minds. But, to my utmost dismay and sadness, should I be threatened, or be made to feel threatened, I Will defend myself to force some respect from them. All I would ever want is a good day and some peace of my own mind; I do not intend, nor have ever intended, unprovoked, to offend anyone. And if my good day is turned bad, because of me feeling threatened by anyone, and then I feel those individuals immediately deserve to have a bad day themselves (and continue living on from there), then it is Their Fault for pushing me into the defensive position in the first place. It really does make me feel sad and most disappointed of the other people when they give me such grief to the point that I have to be put into a position to force some respect out of them. And I have been growing more paranoid of Other People since November of 2007 with the damn bad people over the internet, as well as those I have had the displeasure to have encountered in person who have shown me nothing but a difficult time and even more grief. Also, I sincerely believe nothing would ever be gained from killing anyone, including myself; all that does is forces one or the other into their next realm or life; Nobody really Learns or really Benefits anything from the deaths of any person. That is why I would never own, or want to own, a real gun. "Look out, she's going for her mace!" "What? Would you rather I have a gun with bullets in it?" And that is another thing everyone Should be Aware of: I AM A FEMALE SOUL, and I Prefer to be referred to by the Female Pronouns. Any address of "Sir", or "Man" upon me, will only be met by a cold shoulder or stare in their general direction. And NOBODY should ever be BANNED from a high-volume store like Wal-Mart or Target for anything less offensive than a gun withdrawl or robbery. We All Have Bad Days, and unless we actually Hit a Person or living individual or similar actions, in how we individually react to how we are feeling at the ONE Moment, aside from the other Individual Moments, To Ban an individual is just plain wrong. And acts of protests with JUST Meanings, do not deserve any damn grief either. Just Let Me Live On In Peace, Let Me enjoy my Good Day and Pleasant Shoppings and Outings, and DO NOT BOTHER ME AT ALL. I have No Intention Whatsoever to harm Any Individual Person or Myself. So, Please, Do Not Give Me Reason to be Forced to Defend Myself to garner any respect. All that does is give us all a Bad Day from a Good One. Good Day.

Subsequent court hearings

Chris entering court on April 2.

Chris's hearing schedule has been as follows:

12/29/2014 09:00 AM Result: Continued

02/05/2015 09:30 AM Result: Continued

04/02/2015 09:30 AM Result: Continued

05/07/2015 10:30 AM Result: Continued

06/11/2015 09:30 AM Result: Continued Hearing Type: Preliminary

07/23/2015 09:30 AM

At the video hearing on 29 December (which only consisted of the judge setting bail/bond conditions and a date for the next hearing), Chris was released on bond. The following month he revealed in a Facebook post that, in yet another development mirroring 28 October 2011, the judge had placed a restraining order on Chris as part of his bail conditions, forbidding him from setting foot in any GameStop outlet or contacting any of the company's employees.

His next hearing took place on 5 February. It was decidedly brief as the Chandlers appeared to have hired/been assigned an unsuitable representative, and another hearing in April was scheduled. According to two Virginian Christorians in attendance, little of note happened except Chris and Barb forgetting the date of the next hearing, then pissing off the court by coming back to ask (thus holding up their next case). Additionally, footage was taken of Chris and Barb leaving court--marking the first appearance Barb has made in Christorical media for almost two years.

The subsequent hearing took place on 2 April; Chris began to attend his hearings alone, and reportedly seemed more nervous than in the previous hearing. It began 20 minutes early and was over within minutes; in fact Chris left the courtroom before Christorians made it through security, so no one knows what, if anything, actually happened inside. What is known is that Chris was granted another continuance and the next hearing was scheduled for 7 May. If the legal proceedings of Chris's previous misadventure are any indication, the actual trial may not take place until August or September 2015.

True to this prediction, the hearing on 7 May resulted in another continuance, until 11 June, although the hearing reportedly lasted longer than the one on 2 April. Chris was also seen at McDonalds before attending, again.

The hearing on 11 June was also quickly continued, although Chris was said to have been uncharacteristically sociable and collected, perhaps because his forays on the Impulse Gay Social-Club have made him more comfortable around people. The Christorian in attendance also made note of how the judge and other officials babied him in comparison to others on trial, meaning it is likely that Chris will receive some degree of leniency when the final verdict is made. The next continuance hearing is set for 23 July.

Gallery

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  The store in Fashion Square Mall, site of the incident.

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  The listing of his court hearing.

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  The full details.

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  Chris's violently insane version of the incident.

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  Chris's distinctly unfeminine mugshot.

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  The defacement Chris intended to wreak.

Fan Art

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  Retail employees will now have Chris haunting their nightmares.

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  Chris after life on the inside.

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  Don't call anybody!

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  Fighting the law requires fashion!

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  Meanwhile at Chris's trial...

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  Chris after the trial...

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  Well Trolls, Have the lambs stopped screaming?

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  You may be the top Graduate from The FBI Academy, but he is the most twisted and cunning criminals the world has known.

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  "What a mess I've made, when it all went wrong..."

Miiverse Art

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Video

Chris Chan maces a GameStop employee
Click to load content
Search for video	YouTube, archive
Stardate	27 December 2014
Subject Matter	Video games Video Games
Performance Style	Rage Rage, Violence Violence
Saga	Tomgirl Tomgirl, Sonic Boom Sonic Boom
Shirt	Manchester Sweatshirt
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
previous Brushfire Video	next Wii U - Mario Kart 8 - (GCN) Dry Dry Desert

Transcript

[A beep, most likely from the checkout machine, is heard as Chris walks near the camera. He blows a raspberry, presumably at monozettai, for a nanosecond as he passes the camera]

Chris: Don't call anybody!

[Chris struts confidently towards the store entrance. Unintelligible background noise from other customers can be heard, a family at the counter look shocked and confused by the bizarre creature passing them.]

Clerk: [to customer at register] 22.10 [laughs]

[Chris sprays James Herring, the store's assistant manager, with pepper spray, causing him to quickly back away. A woman, likely the store's manager from Chris's description, walks into view.]

Manager: That guy wants to buy 2... [trails off, realizing what just happened.]

James: Whoa! Hey! [mouths "what the fuck"]

Police Scanner Video

Police scanner
Click to load content
Search for video	YouTube, archive
Stardate	27 December 2014
Subject Matter	Video games Video Games; Other Sonic Boom Protests

Transcript

This media needs a transcript. Help CWCki by transcribing the content. If the media is too long, transcribe select portions which are funny or informative.

[The entire audio is messy, grainy and hard to hear. If there are any inaccuracies in the audio, please feel free to help.]

0:00

Old cop: APC RP 5-7, APC--[mumbling]

Rookie: I'll cover it.

Cool cop: Stay there.

Old cop: He's at Fashion Square Mall. I'll get him. He's not in Shoppers World. I'm probably gonna pull up in the community and park the car. (CUTS OUT) and then...I'll go...check the car. He is described as a (sighs) white male, 5-foot 9, with long brown hair. He was wearing two sets of glasses and fake breasts. (Someone in the background says "what the hell?") The name is supposed to be "Christopher Chandler".

1:00

Rural cop: I'll go and do it. I'm on location.

?: Okay.

?: Doin' okay.

?: Thank you, Ethan.

?: No problem.

?: Uhh... I'll be looking for seven, I'll probably be in that ??? mall for a little bit. Three-nine can just run it.

?: Fine, Arthur. Three-nine, you got... Yeah. He can just route a call from our phone. Okay.

?: Uh, have you sent out that thing from here, ????? Thirty-nine can just draw it.

?: Uh, ???? and ?????

?: Roger.

2:00

(SILENCE)

2:26

Mike: ?????

Woman: Thank you, Mike.

2:32

(SILENCE)

3:23

?: Seven-six APC.

?: Copy, seven-six.

Rural cop: Someone here at the mall with Christopher Chandler. A long time here. Trespass. Banned from the mall.

?: ???? uh, you got ??????

4:00

Old cop: APC RP five-seven.

Rookie: Copy.

?: Uh, ?????

Rookie: That's correct.

Old cop: APC RP five-seven. (PAUSE) ????? seven-six

4:45

(SILENCE)

5:14

Ethan: ??? before seven APC

?: ?????

Ethan: Could I have the report number please?

?: Ethan, your number's 10725. Ten seven two five. (PAUSE) careful??????

Ethan: ???? three units.

?: Sir, can you get me the report number ????????

?: ?????, you have, uh, 10726. Ten seven two six.

6:09

(SILENCE)

7:00

?: APC ?????

Woman: ?????

Old cop: ????? car ??????????????? in the area ???? might have come from a house ????? I'll check the book????

Fan Videos

Dramatic Reading of Chris' Facebook Post Click to load content Stardate 29 December 2014 Made By BrendanielReads Subject Matter 26 December 2014 TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos	Chris Fought the Law Click to load content Stardate 30 December 2014 Made By FavoretFox Subject Matter 26 December 2014 Video Type Parody of The Crickets' "I Fought the Law" TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos
Tyrone Declares Chris Chan's Innocence Click to load content Stardate 17 January 2015 Made By Based Tyrone Subject Matter 26 December 2014 TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos	The Don't Call Anyone Experience Click to load content Stardate 2 April 2015 Made By C Chan Subject Matter 26 December 2014 TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos

See also

• Chris and the Law
• GameStop
• Jail calls
• Sonic Boom Protests
• 28 October 2011

References

⇐ Brushfire Video

Chris's videos

Wii U - Mario Kart 8 - (GCN) Dry Dry Desert ⇒