Animal Crossing Documentary
Chris’s hour-long "Animal Crossing Documentary" is a video where you can watch him reach the peak of his maturity. It offers tours of two different towns saved on two different memory cards. The town of Cwcville is home to Sonichu, who wears a Sonichu outfit. The town of Cwc City is home to Crystal, who wears a Rosechu outfit.
Some of the narration centers around Chris complaining to Nintendo about his many personal problems. He expects the company to remember his fan letters regarding his dreams. He also implies that the company should send him birthday presents, reissue trading cards that went out of print so Chris can collect them, and adopt his fan characters as official Pokemon. He also expresses his distaste for the Playstation 2 and the Playstation, but speaks fondly of many obsolete consoles he owns that weren't made by Nintendo. He also mentions he dislikes a Beyblade game because it's "not real" which is disturbing in retrospect.
The Christian and the Hedgehog Boys debut album is featured prominently, as Chris sings several of the songs aloud and has the CD on repeat playing quietly in the background. The Macarena Yellow is a Mellow Color plays at least three times in the span of an hour. He also sings along to parts of the game. Much like the boatman Charon ferried the souls of the damned to Hades, a character shuttles Sonichu across a river while Chris sings in the voice that got him fired from Wendy's. The singing becomes high-pitched gibberish after two stanzas.
There are a few odd moments, like where Chris compares two fighting insects to I Love Lucy, says a dark-skinned hippopotamus reminds him of Sanford and Son, and talks about his strained relationship with his father. Chris also doesn't mention the bullfrog character named Jeremiah, showing his ignorance of popular music outside of 90's pop music. Also he will gladly pull weeds in this game but not in real life.
Chris mentions "profit" from selling in-game items over and over again. This in no way involves real money and is just Chris selling easily-found items dropped by the game to purchase more furniture and crap, which he finds validating. Chris probably enjoys the game because it showers him with rewards for completing simple tasks, none of which are challenging or stressful.
This is Chris at his most infantile, immersing himself in a game full of soft animal characters with no conflict or challenge, telling jokes that aren't really jokes and singing horrible songs in a horrible voice.
Video
| Animal Crossing Documentary | |
| VideoService "googlevideo" not recognized. | |
| Stardate | 22nd November 2003 |
| Subject Matter |  Video Games,  Website
|
| Other |  Machinima,  Leaked
|
| OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos | |
| previous The City of Cwicville Tour |
next The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special |
Outline
| 00:01-01:24 | Introduction |
| 01:25-19:39 | Tour of Cwcville (part 1 of 2) |
| 19:40-25:19 | Trip to Cwcville Island |
| 25:20-35:24 | Tour of Cwcville (part 2 of 2) |
| 35:25-36:44 | Interlude |
| 36:45-52:39 | Tour of Cwc City |
| 52:40-53:39 | Interlude |
| 53:40-55:54 | Conclusion |
Transcription
Introduction
[Gamecube startup screen with Chris singing along]
[Nintendo screen with Chris saying "Nintendo"]
[00:24]
Hello Nintendo! Welcome to my Animal Crossing for Nintendo GameCube. I am your host. My name is Christian Weston chandler. I live in Ruckersville, Virginia and I is [sic] 21 years old and I play because I am young at heart. So any way we are going to take a tour of my city...in Animal Crossing.
[Goes to main menu]
[00:48]
The city's name is CWCville. See, those are my initials CWC. That's why it is spelled that way.
[Picking menu options]
[01:01]
And my character's name is Sonichu. You may remember him from ahh previous letters I have sent to you guys in the past.
[01:10]
[Game starts to load town]
Anyway we are going to get set up now. [Chris starts singing]
[Game is done loading]
We usually do have a good time.
[1:25]
So anyway, stepping out is my character Sonichu. He's wearing the clothes with the character on it. Like I said you might remember his face. And there's his actual face.
[Shows a sign with the face of Sonichu on it]
You remember the rest of his body you see the whole picture.
And before we get to the daily routines I'm goin' let you...I'm goin' to take you on a tour of my house as well as uh, as well as you know, uh, a daily routine. We'll take a tour of the town, but first the house. You see this logo here, that is the logo to my website on the internet. If you would like to visit, here is the address. I'm going to leave it up for a few seconds.
[Shows the address to his website for a few seconds]
[2:02]
Alright, that's enough.
Now we're gonna take a tour of my house.
Turn on the light so you can see better. This is my first floor obviously. I keep things well organized. I got enough room to walk around in; I can even do a dance, wanna see me do I bit?
[Chris begins to sing]
Yellow is a mellow color
Yes it is a mellow color
Sonichu zaps a lightning
EEEEEHHHHH mellow color
[Chris stops singing]
Yeah. Course...a...when I...a... do a dance. I usually like to have my uh...audience.
[Chris puts a wallpaper up on his house, resembling wrestling fans who just witnessed a Stone Cold Stunner.]
Dodedododododoo. But since it's getting close to Christmas, I have the snowflakes on the wall instead. And I keep it in this closet. So anyway here's a fun thing. This snowman he teach me how to play piano. And by the way just to let you know in case...a...you can hear the...a...music in the background.
[Chris appears to be playing So Need A Cute Girl]
Those are my karaoke numbers that I actually ma...that I actually made up lyrics too, and I have played and uh sang my voice over the originals. So let me give you an example; may I Mister Snowman? "Please go right ahead!" Alright.
[Chris begins to sing again while Sonichu bangs on the piano]
Tell me why
I'm stuck as a
Virgin with Rage?
Tell me why
I so need a
Cute Girl my age
Tell me why
I never wanna
Hear you say
I have a boyfriend!
[Chris stops singing]
And that was inspired by a real thing. By the way that's your website...that is your website isn't it? Nintendo.com, it's a nice place to visit; but we cannot live there. Which brings us up to our next subject.
[A calendar of November appears on the screen]
The diary, you guys did a good job of it going back and forth within a 12 month radius. By the way, this is my birthday, right here my actual birthday, I was born in 1982. You guys...in case you want to take a note there. OK, that's long enough. So anyway uh, it does make a...not only does it work for a calendar, but it makes for a good monthly journal. As for a monthly journal entry here in November.
[Chris begins to scroll up and down his journal entry]
Yeah I tried to get a girlfriend because, I don't have a girlfriend. But I have made up a poem, let you guys read it.
My dreams of getting a girlfriend was crushed by the medeling [sic] "Mary Lee Walsh."
Christian Chandler.
November 4, 2003
Saddest Heart in the World
Lonesome and sad, lonesome and sad, the "Mastermind" is very bad. In efforts of getting a Boyfriend-Free gal, that female dog took my only idea for a fall. Heart-broken, sad and very lonely, I'll never remove my virginity. And with Backstreet Boys' tune, I sing my lonesome croon: "Tell me why I'm stuck as a virgin with rage. Tell me why, I so need a...
All right. Scroll down a little bit as we go along.
...cute girl my age. Tell me why, I ain't ever wanna hear you say 'I have a boyfriend.'" And so, deep in dreary thought, a girl was what I sought. A stitch in time, will never remove my...
It's a very good pro...poem, because I am an artist, as well as a poet. I make a rhyme every time.
...crying rhyme. I may be destined for loneliness forever, fate is to blame...whatever. I conclude this cry, to say that as long as there are no matching girls, my happiness well runs dry.
Anyway that's my poem, but in case...a you didn't notice here. Look right here "Tell me why, I'm stuck as a virgin with rage". I put my song lyric in here because it was inspired; because I do not have a girlfriend. You know why, cause I have a phobia that every girl I talk to she already has a boyfriend.
Right. So anyway moving on with the tour of my house. As you can see I've got I'm collecting the NES games. I've got most of them down here, and I've got a couple upstairs. One of em's fake you know which one I'm talking about, does April 1st strike a bell? So my favorite game is right here.
["Would you like to play
DK Jr MATH?"]
I like it because...a it really challenges the mind in the math area and gets your memory fresh there. And by the way notice the two logos here?
[Chris is making a notion towards the GameCube and N64 logos]
It's a good way to welcome the guests, that come into your house. Ol' Nintendo 64 on the left, and GameCube on the right, caught them before an after deal. Oh and look at this, a good little south feng shui here. Of course makes for a good welcome mat. Speaking of feng shui, I've got my red items against the east side. And helps of getting more NES games; specially that Wario's Woods. By the way, how the heck do you get that game anyway? I mean all you tell us do to is to go to Animal Island. And then what the heck do we do? You should have given us more details, back in the previous issue of uh The Crossing Guardian.
Speaking of which I've been a long time subscriber. So therefore I've got all their previous issues. And I time travel back and forth when I start Animal Crossing to collect a few items, but in respect to uh...time traveling back because I missed a few items I made a new character named "Tim Timetale" and uh he time-traveled back and got the remaining items, give them to me, as well as the other character I made up, and uh the uh the other city in Slot B, which uh I'll tell you about that later.
[6:45]
[Character walks up stairs to the second floor of house]
Anyway, we're going upstairs. This is my bedroom. It's a lot of fun, isn't it, because I like to make things fun since, you know, I'm young at heart. And here's a fun joke. Turn on the TV sit down and watch TV while I wait t-to get on the internet. It's a good way to kill time anyway. Anyway, here's the fake [brings up caption for the April Fool's NES game, Super Tortimer]. Sound familiar? Right [sighs]. Anyway, this is my bed. The harvest bed. Nice choice, isn't it? I'm going to take a quick nap.
[7:17]
[Character lays down on bed while Chris makes snoring noises too close to the microphone]
OK. Nap's over. All right. You want to see my music collection? [Brings up music menu] It's all good. I got them all courtesy of K.K. Slider. Well, of course, the first one was a freebie from the e-reader card. "Swipe, Swipe, Swipe". Anyway, here's the fan and the Mario Brothers stuff. Oh, and uh you notice what time it is? It's 1:15. Good time to start. In the afternoon.
[7:48]
[Character walks down stairs to first floor of house]
Anyway, now we're going down to the basement.
[Character walks down stairs to the basement of house]
Let me just turn on the lights. I keep my models down here. It's a nice little aero fa [sic] models, and I leave enough room for me to walk around in. Well. That's a cute joke.
"Hey. Stop. You're under arrest."
"What for?"
"For uh being the black market, you red fox."
"Ah, geez."
And I got both houses. Yeah, I scored that high with the HRA. Notice this train? I wonder where it's headed to. It's probably headed over to the memory card in Slot B. I'll tell you about that city later. Anyway. This is where I do my cooking. If uh if you can ever do your cooking in Animal Crossing for Nintendo GameCube. I have that DVD. And this is the fridge. I could store my food in there, but I can't. What? Does it have a padlock on it or something? Oh, look. Here's my phone. Let's make a phone call. [Pulls up phone menu, calling the Dial-a-Psychic] Hello? Thank you. Good advice. Hey. Let's have a seat on this thing. I like this thing. Listen to this. [Character sits on the couch and it makes a fart noise]. Let me do that again. [Character again jumps on the couch as it makes a fart noise] One more time. [Character again jumps on couch with predictable results] OK. That's enough. Too much fun and you'll die laughing.
[9:04]
[Character walks up stairs to first floor of house]
So anyway. That's my house. Let me just turn off the lights before I leave.
[Character walks out the front door of house]
Alright, now where going to go through my daily routines. As well as a tour of the town.
[Pause menu pops up]
You notice I've got an empty inventory. And by the way, here's a good rule of thumb. Keeping my shovel, net, pole, axe, and letters here on the bottom row. You know why? I'll tell you bout that when we get to the next shop. Anyway, I usually check my mail; what do you know I got three presents. Let's see what this one is though. Bob.
How ARE you, Sonichu?
Well now, I bet your bottom Bell you didn't expect me to cut out and split town, huh? Nope, I shocked the world! I'm turning over a new leaf- see you on the flip side!
Laters, Bob
Oh I guess he moved out, oh well.
[Sonichu proceeds to throw out poor Bob's letter, then collect his gift from the remaining]
Anyway, let's see what we got from the uh, probably from the museum; because I did up those fossils and uh...I sell them. Makes a nice profit.
[Sonichu throws away all three letters]
I just quickly uh read through them and then throw them away. You know like...junk mail! You could also say pop-ups if they had "x's" on em.
[Sonichu begins to open his gifts]
See what we got here, A dinosaur track, a Tricera tail, and a dinosaur egg. Well that'll make a nice profit. By the way, in case you missed it the first time I'll put it up again.
[Once again shows the address to his website]
Ok you got it, alright now. Before we head to Nook's shop which will be the last stop on the tour; we go- we're gonna take the rest of the tour here. Alright let's see. Well this is the train station. But I travel to the other city which I'll tell you about now. The name of the city is CWCcity. Spelled C-W-C-c-i-t-y, we'll visit there latter, but not by train of course. It'll be a hou-It'll be a run by the uh character named Crystal, C-r-y-s-t-a-l, when we get there. All right. Oh, look at this, a hole in the ground.
[opens the menu to equip his golden shovel€]
Yeah, you see, sometimes there's an item in CWCcity. I don't have it here in CWCville because I have CWCville a lot longer than CWCcity. I bring stuff from CWCcity over here.
[he digs up the buried item - it's a folding chair]
'Cause obviously I did not collect this one yet. I got good memory.
[Sonichu screws up and digs another hole; he cleans both of them up]
Yeah, and also I got a good taste for music because I grew up on music. So anyway let's move on with- oh, you notice this [a golden statue of Sonichu]? You know why this is here?
[This statue was erected in honor of Sonichu's full loan repayment!]
I paid my debt. And this is Sonichu's mug again, right next to the master.
[Sonichu runs past a sign reading "H.F.A." with two almost invisible red eyes]
Oh, look at this. H.F.A. And very mean eyes. Must mean something bad. ...I know what it means. I'll tell you about it at the end of the documentary here. Uh, the city of CWCville and CWCcity, or otherwise all the deal [?] in Animal Crossing for Nintendo GameCube, in a nutshell.
[Sonichu enters the acre with the post office on it]
So anyway, here's the post office, do my mailing and such and the e-reader swipes. By the way there's a good way to profit from the e-reader, I'll tell you about it in CWCcity.
[Sonichu comes across a shining ring in the ground]
Oh, what do you know! A money spot. I'll just dig up the thousand bells.
[Sonichu pulls a shovel out of his inventory and digs up the money sack]
Yep, thousand bells, just bury that up. Mmm, drag it up there. Use the R button to quickly pick up the items.
[Sonichu enters the acre with the dump in it, he enters it]
Anyway, here's the dump. I come here first, pick up the- whatever items I want every time I start Animal Crossing. Hmm, got a shirt, what do we have here? A plant. I's have picked up a pothos before so I know it's a plant.
[Sonichu starts wandering into some acres filled with trees]
I don't really use plants in my house you n-n-noticed, essept for that Christmas Tree but that's for, you know, the holidays. Anyway she's around here, I want to show you my favorite character that I kind of got to know from the start.
[Sonichu finds his way into an acre with a house on it]
Oop, she just went in. So let's go say hello.
[Sonichu follows some blue cat into a house and rams into it]
Yeah uhm, uhm, would you come out here please?
[Sonichu walks back into the center of the room and back into the blue cat, he pushes it into a corner]
Mmm... Darnit, I can't see her but anyway uh, I think you recognize her. Oh here we go a little bit. Yeah mint, she's a sweety.
[Sonichu talks to the Mint about some random crap]
She gave me a birthday present on my 21st birthday when I time-traveled back. Talk to me!
[Mint rambles on about how it's cold out and how winter's coming]
[unintelligible], it's November.
[Mint asks Sonichu if he has a heater]
Yeah I got a heater in the basement.
[Mint jokingly mocks him about turning on heaters during November]
[Chris chuckles] Yea.
[Mint says something about how it's going to get colder]
That's right. Well, I'll see you later Minty, you're a sweety.
[Sonichu leaves Mint's house]
Anyway that's uhh all so on the trip. We'll take a look at all the other colorful characters we have around here.
[The town map comes up, different acres are examined]
Also uh every time I keep track of the-uh map so that I can see if anyone new came in. Oh, we got a new neighbor, Bertha. I haven't noticed her before. So she's obviously new. So anyway uh, let's move on.
[Sonichu start's running through the woods and comes across some kangaroo]
Here's another character I grew up with. Actually she moved in, and lived here most of the time. Marcy. And now she's wearing a Sonichu shirt. Sonichu is very popular in CWCville.
[Sonichu heads south to an acre with some green mouse's house in it]
There's [unintelligible], she just went in.
[Sonichu head's west and finds some giraffe's house]
And there's Elmer. He just went in, he's one of the senior citizens around here too. I say that because he's lived here- by the way our ne- our city pe- fruit is a peach. But I've grown a lot of orange, pears n such.
[14:15]
[Sonichu is heads west and finds a white cat, she says something about how CWCville is amazing]
Oh what do you know, it's that girl from the train.
[He talks to Blanca]
I draw her face every time, but when I'm in a hurry I just color it, the whole thing, and she just looks like a... Blank face. But I gave her a face last time.
[Sonichu starts to head out of the acre but turns around and runs back in]
Oh, there was another character up here on the hill.
[Sonichu heads to a goat's house by a river]
And she just came out, [unintelligible]. What do you know, Elmer's clothes.
[Sonichu runs out of that acre back into the woods]
Anyway, moving on with the tour.
[Sonichu comes to some giant tree with a fountain thing in front of it, Chris mistakes it for a well. Some billboards are to the right of it]
Well, [Chris chortles] good joke. Anyway I also, you know I like to use the billboards, put my signs up. There's my Sonichu site logo, there's Sonichu's mug. I got two here side by side represent the holidy and such. Yea here we got your corn that you got from the previous issue and I drew this leaf.
[It doesn't look like a leaf]
Obviously for Thanksgiving and the harvest festival.
[A blue bear walks into the video]
Oh, look there's Groucho. He's wearin' a Sonichu site shirt. Let's say hello.
[Sonichu starts speaking with Groucho]
Entertain me.
[Groucho bitches about his mom and fruit]
A [unintelligible] huh?
[Groucho offers Sonichu an apple, Sonichu accepts]
I-I'll take one. Yeah, it makes a nice little profit when you talk to them and most of the time it happens from the jobs.
[Sonichu walks east and comes across a green lion's house]
So anyway. Yeah, here's Leopold, he moved in a long time-
[Sonichu makes his way to a green rooster's abode]
Here's Hank, he's one of the senior citizens around here also. [unintelligible]
[Sonichu runs to a teal hippo's house]
Let's go see our new neighbor. Oh, here she is. She must be Bertha. Hello Bertha.
[Sonichu talks to Bertha, Bertha talks about how nice the town is etc. etc.]
It is a nice place. Heh you're scatterbrained. Ok, yeah, well see you around!
[Sonichu heads south towards a museum]
[Chris Grunts] Here's the Museum.
[Sonichu heads inside]
Let's go look at the exhibits.
[We see the inside of the museum, as Sonichu heads towards the insect section.]
First, we'll look at the bug exhibit.
[Sonichu is now inside the insect section.]
I got most of the bugs.
I'll show 'ya. This is my bug collection, I caught them all one-by-one and donated them one-by-one.
Wanna' see my number of fish? Not as much.
Not as much. Anyway, uh, all the bugs are just runnin' around here.
Hey, whaddya' know, we got a couple- few bugs on the trees here.
Two of them are fighting. Well, that's funny, like Lucy and Desi.
I love Lucy.
Anyway, uh, nebit, cebit, zibit, the fish exhibit.
Yeah, you can see here I caught those fish and I donated them.
Hmm, this one is empty.
I guess it's waiting for a kind donation.
Yeah, here's a bunch of fish; here's some more fish.
One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish.
Alright, anyway, moving on with the tour the museum, take a look at the paintings.
I haven't gotten them all yet, but, uh, I got a few.
Here's a nice one, it's strange though. sw- why- I gu- why I'd call it a strange painting.
Yeah, some of them are- most of them are just waiting for a kind donation, but I got this one from a swipe.
Well, my favorite painting around here is, uh, right here.
Washington crossing the Delaware, but you guys call it the Classic Paining.
Anyway, moving on, We're gonna' check out what I worked hard for and actually got done, the fossil section.
|
This media needs a transcript. Help CWCki by transcribing the content. If the media is too long, transcribe select portions which are funny or informative. |
End of video spoiler: "HFA" stands for "High-Functionally Autism". Apparently, this is Chris's autistic way of saying "High-Functioning Autism".
Nintendo Power's Article
Nintendo Power’s May 2004 article on Chris’s documentary covers only Sonichu’s life in Cwcville. The way that the article speaks of Sonichu’s actions, most casual readers would be led to believe that “Sonichu” is the real name of the person who submitted the documentary.
Transcript
| Sonichu’s Cwcville Documentary
Simply amazing. There’s no other way to describe what we received from Sonichu of Cwcville—a full video documentary that walked us through his daily life. His opulent manor contained every manner of furniture. Cwcville’s landscape was filled to the bursting point with all the animals who’d moved to his well-tended town. And Sonichu has customized everything about his town—even many villagers have followed his bold trends, wearing the patterns he has created! (Image captions:) Sonichu has packed the museum with his fads—its bug collection is hopping. He often visits Sonichu Island to bring its high-value coconuts to town. And he uses the spare hut on the island to store his huge collection of oddities. Cwcville is brimming with Sonichu’s patterns, including the popular Poké Ball. |
PVCC's News Report
The 26 April 2004 issue of PVCC's school newspaper, The Forum, included a news report on the "accomplishments" of then-student Christian Chandler. The first half of the article discusses Chris's OFFICIAL and ORIGINIAL creation, Sonichu, while the second half covers Chris's Animal Crossing Documentary, going so far as to quote Nintendo Power's own coverage. Everyone can draw their conclusions of how slow news day it was at the PVCC by comparing how big the Nintendo Power article was, and how big this article was.
Transcript
| Meet Sonichu Student featured in "Nintendo Power" By Kari Mitchell Most everyone has a hobby. It may be hard to find free time in between classes, especially with exam week quickly approaching, but PVCC student Christian Chandler, has dedicated many hours to his past time. He is the creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. Like Sonic, Sonichu can run at high speeds. "During Super Sonic's battle against the Perfect Chaos monster (Sonic Adventure DX for Gamecube), Super Sonic was spat out by the monster, and colldied with a by-standing Pikachu," Chandler explained. According to his story, the power from the Chaos Emeralds transformed Pikachu into Sonichu. The idea for the character came from a project Chandler was assigned his senior year of high school. He was enrolled in a computer graphics class that required him to design a CD cover. His original idea was to put Sonic and Pikachu on the cover, however, both characters are copyrighted. Instead he decided to combine the characters into something all his own. Thus, on March 17, 2000, Sonichu was born. Over time, Chandler began to mold and expand the life of Sonichu, giving him stories, homemade trading cards, clay figures, a board game, and a Sonichu medallion with charms, among other things. Chandler and the world he created for Sonichu were featured in the May 2004 issue of Nintendo Power. The place was called Cwcville (The "Cwc" prefix are his initials, Christian Weston Chandler). Nintendo Power was apparently impressed with Chandler's work. "Simply amazing. There's no other way to describe what we received from Sonichu of Cwcville - a full video documentary that walked us through his daily life." The documentary, running about an hour, was taped from the Nintendo Gamecube title, Animal Crossing. He dubbed his voice over the sound through a microphone and audio input in his VCR. In the documentary, Chandler covers "basically how I do things in Animal Crossing as the boy character, Sonichu, in the city of Cwcville." Some of the tasks include using the journal as a monthly diary, making money, customizing the city, and conversing with another Animal Crossing city. For now, Sonichu remains a hobby in the future, Chandler would like to see Sonichu and his friends as real Pokémon, even having their own Nintendo Gamecube video game title. "I am not really sure what to do in order to do all that," Chandler said, "but for now, Sonichu and I, Christian C., are in Nintedo Power Magazine!" |
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