PlayingHouse
PlayingHouse is a video Chris uploaded on 25 October 2010. In this video, Chris plays with some LEGO people like a pedofork. Most notably, he points out the peeps and poops of his fictional children. Chris most likely got this phrase from the Family Guy episode "Whistle While Your Wife Works", where Herbert tells his dog to make these.
Also, this video suggests that, if they were to be married, Chris would want Jackie to work as a journalist during the day while he lies around at home, "taking care of the children".
It is interesting to note that while "Crystal" is portrayed as a sweet and intelligent little girl (attending school and writing in a diary at four years old, no less), her little brother "Reginald" is only referred to when Chris laments him expelling various bodily fluids and crying all night, at one point demanding he stay quiet so he can enjoy Jackie's sweet, wet china in peace. As such, it's another example of Chris's misandry.
Also of note is Chris's first use of what appears to be a makeshift stage with lighting — though as with everything else Chris does with camerawork and lighting, it is badly done — the viewer can see one of the corners of the box because of the shadow, the light is still too low, and the camera isn't centered on the scene.
Video
| PlayingHouse | |
| Search for video | YouTube, archive |
| Stardate | 25 October 2010 |
| Subject Matter |  Other  Sex
|
| Performance Style |  Crazy
|
| Saga |  Jackie
|
| Shirt | Unclear |
| OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos | |
| previous SonichuBabies |
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Transcript
Narrating: Okay, here's another story - in all its love and glory. Alright, this is me. This is my sweetheart. These are our children, that's, uh, Reginald, this one's Crystal. Reginald's da baby. Younger brother. This'll-this'll double as, table, and uh, beds. At their respective times. So... on with the show. AnIhome. And my wife's coming home from work.
Jackie: [High pitched voice] Hi honey halhome!
Chris: [Normally] Oh hi sweetheart, how ya doin'. How was your day at work.
Jackie: Oh it's been good, I'm just happy to see you home safe. [Kissing sound] Kiiiiiss. Anyways, journalism is very hard.
Chris: Yes it is, I hear. So, what happened today?
Jackie: Aw, we - aw, I meant... you... oh - my article got printed, it got very huge responses!
[Wiggles "Jackie", tips her over]
Chris: Really.
Jackie: Yes! But unfortunately uhh dey laid off Wilkinson at work.
Chris: Lllayday off Wilkinson! What they do that for?
Jackie: 'Pparently he wasn't keepin' up!
Chris: Oh. That's a shame.
["Children" slide in front of the screen] Wheeewheewheewheewhee! [Lego figures appear unfazed]
Jackie: So, how're the kids?
Chris: D-dey're doin' okay. You know, there's a... pla... they're just playing. Uh. Actually, uh. Cry-actually Crystal is uh, doin' her preschool homework and uh, Reg-Reginald's been uh, been a messy lil' baabychild! Made his lil' peeps n' poops! And he we-and he went... weewee all over the bathroom, it was terrible mess. Terrible mess. I cl-had to clean all that up and of course I changed all of his diapers too. When they needed changin'. I fed the boy. I fed the girl, too. [Awkward silence. Chris knocks over "Jackie"] Anyway, they're doin' okay.
Jackie: So how's uhhwubde-dendibeready?
Chris: Yes, dinner will be ready in a f-about fifteen minutes so you can go uh, put your f-put your things away and I-come to dinner.
Jackie: Alright.
["Jackie" flies off, followed by "Chris"]
[Table and chairs are set out]
Chris: Dinnertime! Numnumnumnum! [Lego figures join table]
[Offscreen] Oh sh-which ones did I say? Blue one's Reginald, orange one's Crystal. And Reginald needs a booster seat.
Narrating: Mmm, anyway, we just finished off dinner.
Jackie: Mmm, that was delicious dear.
Chris: Why thank you. It was a-was a specialty that I have learned from the uh-home and-the uh, food channel. New recipe. Chicken calzone. An', mashed potatoes, n' green beans.
Jackie: Myeah, it was very good.
Reginald: Bububububoobee! Th!
Chris: Aah, too bad lil' Reginald end up uh, throwing up in some places...
Crystal: Daddy, can I go my woom now, I think I'm gonna do my... uh, write my diary, and y'know guh get ready for bed soon.
Chris: Okay sweetheart, y-go k-Crystal, go take care of yourself.
Crystal: Thank you daddy!
Reginald: Dababubudee!
Jackie: I'll now take Reginald off your hands, and you can take care of the uh-dinner table and all that, okay.
Narrating: Alright so, I take care of the dishes... Duhduhduhduhduhduhdadada... And then a lil' while later, go upstairs t'... tuck children into bed...
Crystal: Daddy, that was a very lovel- very nice story you read to me.
Chris: I'm glad you enjoyed it, Crystal.
Crystal: Daddy, will i be-do you know what I might be when I grow up?
Chris: No. What do you think you might be when you grow up?
Crystal: I thiink, I want to be a ballerina dancer. Either that, or a police pers- police woman. I'm still undecided.
Chris: That's alright, you ma-you take your time, make up your mind, it'll come to you, dear. Night! [Fumbles with toy] Oops. ["Kisses"] Goodnight sweetheart. Goodnight little girl.
Crystal: Goodnight!
Narrating: Now we tuck Re- And now we tuck Reginald in.
Reginald: Dabadabadabadubu!
Chris: ["Kiss"] Mmm, well you sleep tight little partner. Don't be makin' no cries tonight.
Reginald: Dubehbedubuh.
Chris: Mmm. Wow, he's sound asleep already, hope he stays that way for the rest of the night.
[Begins to press "Jackie" and "Chris" into the "bed"] Mmm, legos don't want to fit together.
["Jackie" and "Chris" are on the bed. The bed is only 4 units wide, so both characters are teetering on the edge.]
Narrating: And now, me n' my wife in bed. Mmm... So what's up ho- what's up for tomorrow?
Jackie: Well I got another case to report... I got me doi- they got me doin' a trial with uh- some- with some- against some dude who uh, murdered somebody. S'posed to be really big, so... Take it up on that.
Chris: Alrigh... Mmm... I got m- got my- tomorrow's shopping day. Have to deal with the uh... Sh- Have to deal with the, little Reginald, crying on the back seat with me, so... Crystal will keep him calm.
Jackie: That's good...
[Chris begins to do the inevitable, but luckily notices in time that society seems to require that pesky "asking" part]
Chris: So, you wanna do it?
Jackie: Yeah, why not. [Chris pushes the lego figures together] Oh yeah, you do it good. [Chris begins to bang the figures together painfully, in a sex scene that lasts for approximately 5 seconds] Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah awhwww, good, goin' great, you did good. Yay.
Chris: Ahh, goodnight. Sleeep tight.
[Chris, avoiding the previous tragedy of getting the figures on the bed, just drops the minifigures on the floor.]
Narrating: The e-
See also
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