Trollsta's Paradise: A True and Honest Tribute to Christian & The Hedgehog Boys

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"My piss is yellow."
 

 

— Poppy War, YouTube

The album cover for the deluxe edition.

Trollsta's Paradise: A True and Honest Tribute to Christian & The Hedgehog Boys is an album created by the now-defunct music group Guwange, released on Bandcamp.com on 5 January 2012 (coincidentally, Chris and Barb faced hearings over trials on the same day). The album was mostly created so lead singer Rex Rowan Nabours III could raise money for charity. Like the title states, the album consists mostly of covers of Christian and the Hedgehog Boys songs, re-done in a lo-fi folk-punk sound, and includes songs from both their debut album and their second.

The album was featured in an article published by the Houston Press on 12 July 2012. Rex was quoted as saying "I did a Christian Weston Chandler (the Sonichu guy) covers album earlier this year with the intent of giving any money I made off of it to Autism-related charities because the dude is basically blackface for autism."

While the album has a lo-fi sound, much of Guwange's covers are far more listenable than the original "songs". Rex may not carry the best vocals, but he still is actually able to hit the right notes in songs.

Scattered throughout the album are audio clips of some videos from Chris.

Release

Although it helped gain the band a cult status amongst other Christorians, the album was released with little fanfare. However, it was a huge success in Molvania.

Initially, the album was released with a "pay-what-you-want" format, but the option to download was taken down later. Eventually, the album was made available to download for free. The zip file download of the album also contains videoclips of An Ol' Classic Dream, SHE IS MINE NOW, and the first Videobook.

On 13 February 2015, a special deluxe edition of the album was released, featuring four new songs missing from the original release--including the album's namesake song.

Text Document

On the day of this EP's release, Christian Weston Chandler, known on the internets as "Chris-Chan", will be having a court hearing for 2 misdemeanors and a felony he incurred back in October. He will probably be going to jail for awhile, or, at the very least, be institutionalized and all of us internet kids will probably never hear from him again.

If you've followed his misadventures for any length of time you probably saw this coming. Since 2007, when users of 4chan and Encyclopedia Dramatica discovered Chandler and his comic series "Sonichu" (based around a character that is literally a hackjob of Sonic the Hedgehog and Pikachu), Chris-Chan has been making a huge ass out of himself both all over the internet and the state of Virginia. For the sake of brevity, please check out www.sonichu.com if you're not already familiar with him.

Anyway, in 2006 Chris-Chan made an album under the name "Christian & The Hedgehog Boys". It consisted of him singing really stupid original lyrics badly over other people's songs. Not karaoke or instrumental versions of these songs either, he just tried his best to shout over the existing vocals, and, like everything else he's done, it's both profoundly hilarious and side-splittingly disturbing. He made two more albums, "Christian & The Hedgehog Boys COMEBACK!" in 2009 and "SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD" in 2011. They are more of the same, only he got lazier as time passed and, by the 3rd album, wasn't writing new lyrics for any of the songs anymore.

This album consists of covers of selected songs from "Christian & The Hedgehog Boys" and it's sequel. I did not touch the 3rd album because none of the songs featured re-written lyrics. Two of the songs on this album are covers of Christian & The Hedgehog Boys B-Sides, one of which is hidden as a bonus track in the download.

If you do choose to pay for it, please be aware that neither Chris-Chan nor I will be receiving any sort of money from this endeavor. Any profit I make from the sales of "Trollsta's Paradise" will be donated to some sort of Autism awareness charity (anyone familiar with Chris-Chan will know why), but I haven't decided on which one yet. I still have research to do on that. I will not be giving any money to Chris-Chan because everyone knows he'll just waste it on PSN stuff or sex toys. If he wants art supplies (there hasn't been a new Sonichu comic in awhile) or something I'll be happy to send him those, and if he wants to collaborate on new, fully-original music or something and split the profits we could work something out, I'm sure. Given his history with money and things of that nature I refuse to give him any funds that could be going to a more worthwhile cause.

In addition, if you represent Christian or any of the artists whose songs we butchered and you'd like me to take them down my versions I will gladly do so. Please keep in mind, however, that this is the internet and given the subject matter of this album it will probably wind up being distributed everywhere without my knowledge. Also, good luck with taking Chris's albums down. It's probably not going to happen.


I feel both pleased and disgusted with myself for allowing this to be the first thing I release this year. All the 10th Grade Cutie fankids who've been angry with me for taking such a career detour after that band ended will finally get their traditional xpunkxrawkx with electric instrumentation and real drums and yelling album this year though (and I'm going to be stuck playing those songs live for at least another 6 or 7 months, if not longer, although I'll probably stop doing shows for a bit later this year when my videogame launches), so I have to do dumb, masturbatory things like this while I can. IT'S FUN. TRY IT SOMETIME. YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE A SERIOUS BUSINESS MUSICIAN DUDE ALL THE TIME. NO MATTER WHAT ANYONE SAYS, ACTING LIKE YOU'RE ONE OF THOSE IS STUPID AND PRETENTIOUS. NO ONE HAS TIME FOR THAT SHIT ANYMORE, THEY'LL JUST SKIP YOUR BAND AND FIND SOMETHING BETTER. THIS IS HOW LIFE WORKS.

DESTROY ALL MUSIC.

-Rex Ronan, January 3rd, 2012

Tracklisting

Deluxe Edition Bonus Tracklisting

See also

Links