The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special
The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special is a video Chris made on the 24th anniversary of Bob and Barb on 07 June 2004. It provides a valuable background to Chris's parents and how they met in a bar.
Part 1
| The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special Part 1 | |
| Stardate | 7th June,2004 |
| Subject Matter |  Video games; Relatives
|
| Performance Style |  Reason
|
| Other |  Machinima;  Leaked
|
| OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos | |
| previous Animal Crossing Documentary |
next The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special Part 2 |
| “ | And this Chinese Lion here, that's [because] he's been to Korea, for war and World War Two, I believe it was | ” |
| Chris | ||
Transcript
[starts with several information boxes]
Nintendo Presents A Christian/Sonichu Production
For Barbara & Robert Chandler (Christian' Mom & Dad) It's...[sic]
The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special Now here's your host, Christian Chandler!
Most of everything was done by Christian Chandler. Games used for this program: Animal Crossing, Mario Paint
With Special Thanks to Nintendo, Barbara Chandler, Robert Chandler, Christian Chandler
Stay Tuned for Behind the Scenes Action...
This has been a Christian/Sonichu production. The End
Due to limited items, the following program may have some innacurate furniture for each parent...
[Chris starts speaking]
Hi, Mom and Dad. How're you doing? This is my lil' present for y'all... a li'l documentary for y'all, here in Animal Crossing for Nintendo GameCube, about how y'all were, and how you are now and so forth. So take a trip back in time, won't you, as we explore, uh, how each of you were.
Of course, first we'll travel back in time tooo.. The time of good ol' Robert Franklin Chandler Jr. He was a hip youngster back in his day, and, uhh, all that stuff he—was—he fought in the war, he likes—e worked hard and stuff. Let's take a look inside his château, and, uhh, see what describes him as him.
He collects records, and he's got lots of 'em, and he's got so many shelves. He likes Caller record case... Yeah. Anyway, let's see, uh, he likes to, uh, make models and... he likes trains. This is his, uh, train model set. Look, it's got a cute li'l tunnel. Yeah... And, you know, he- he didn't have it [television] back then, but he has it now. He likes to sit back and watch television. Like I said, he likes scale models. And here's a good model: a rocket. Yeah... He was a technical engineer over at, uh, General Electric Company. Ahh, he designed the controls for plastic modeling machines, so, without him, you couldn't have a plastic for, uhh... say of the toy train here. Yes.
An', also, Bob went around the world a bit. One place, he went to New York. See, there's the Statue of Liberty there. [referring to the in-game item] He also, uhh, he was born in, uhh, Texas. That's why we have this li'l cactus here. Oh, and here's a li'l bo--ship in a bottle here, 'cause y'know, he did go around the world. At least by water. He was born a Cherokee in, uhh, Texas. Actually, he was—he was, like, one-sisteenths Cherokee, but that's why we have this totem pole here. And this Chinese Lion here, that's, uhh, he was—he's been—he's been to Korea, for, uhh, war and World War Two, I believe it was [in one sentence, Chris shows he has no grasp of history or geography], and he got, uhh, a conduct Medal of Honor, so that's what this is right here.
And you'll notice this is his shirt. It's a... blue tartan. Same pattern as his—uhh—his—his—uhh—regular shirt. That's what they call it in Animal Crossing. This pattern here for his umbrella is a composition of four trumpets, 'cause, uhh, he likes music. 'Course. Of course he likes to think, so, while he's thinking he, uhh, pays the bills on his, uhh, desk, and, uhh, nowadays, he uses a computer, but back in the—back in his old days, a—a computer would fill up a WHOLE ROOM, and it would have been much bigger than a refrigerator, and everybody in the business loved computers. [weird robotic voice] "I LOVE YOU, BIG COMPUTER". Which I could say the same thing for a—a radio. Back then, in the 1930's, they was the size of a refrigerator. And e'rybody loved the radio, as well. "I love you, radio". And, of course, when he does his, uh, thinking, he, uhh, so he likes wipin' out. He may have had one before, but he doesn't have one now. A chalkboard. And you know what he's thinkin' about at this moment? Social studies. [laughs in a Peter Griffin-esque manner] That's if (????) on the chalkboard. An', of course, he likes playing games, so we have this li'l chessboard here.
And, uhh, he's a bit of an outdoors person, as well, so here's a representation of our backyard... or, probably his backyard in the day. Here, we have, uhh, the sprinkler for watering the garden, and we have a li'l pond. "Hey! Who's up for a burgerrr? Who's up for a burgerr?" ...Yeah. He can also look into outer space, with this telescope. Hm.... I see there's the, uhh, sun. I can't look directly into it because it's so bright. If I turn it a lil' bit...—oh, look I see the moon. The moooon. And, of course he, er, takes care of his, uhh, yard and flowers, so he u—he likes to mow the lawn. Mow the lawn. Mow the lawn. And, uhh, when he can, with, uhh, with his, uhh, girlfriend, back in the day, was Barbara. Yeah.... Take her on a picnic. Yeah. Nice li'l picnic table.
So, now we go downstairs to another point--another good point in his life: Good ol' May's pub. Yeah. Got everythin'. He, uhh, drank coffee 'round here, an'... stuff. An', most of the time, around here, in May's pub, he sang. Up here on the stage. Along with the, uhh, classic jazz music of the day. And, of course, in a pub, y'know, you always have a bartender.
"Hey, barkeep! Lemme have a—uhh, Martini, will ya?"
"I'm sorry, bud, but we have no Martinis."
"Oh, okay then just get me a, uhh, b—brewski."
[in a stupid-ass voice] "One BEER, comin' up!"
[Chuckles]
At bars, you notice, of course, they have a telephone to talk to, uhh, people. 'Course, uhh, yeah, back then, yeah, they had telephones. And, of course, like I see, I've been into good music, so.... Here's a good essample. Here, uhh, let me give that to you again. That's a li'l tune I whipped up, uhh, Sonic's theme song. That's, uhh, that's a town tune. [Queue obnoxiously loud bass] And, of course, he also likes the other classical instruments, such as the cello. He sho—he should have hung around in a room that was mellow, then he wouldn't've liked the cello.
Anyway, uhh, that's pretty much the last, uhh, Bob Chandler. Of course, in no—in a—i—hero business, he's also known as Flower Man.. 'Cause he saves flowers' lives more than humans'. So, now, let's time travelll... to another tiime. Oh... yeah, time of Barbara Chandler. Let's see who she is. But, of course, naturally, she has brown hair but this is Animal Crossing, and it gave me blue hair by default. Anyway, let's go into her house and see what her life's got us. Back in her childhood, they had a small house, but, yeah, she had many brothers and sisters—
Part 2
| The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special Part 2 | |
| Stardate | 07 June,2004 |
| Subject Matter | Video games; Relatives
|
| Performance Style | Reason
|
| Other | Machinima; Leaked
|
| OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos | |
| previous The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special Part 1 |
next The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special Part 3 |
Transcript
| “ | Anyway she chased him down a hallway... and cornered him | ” |
| Chris, on how his parents met. | ||
...So she had to share. But she had a quite a few... interests of heart. [Exhales] And, nowadays, she likes to use a computer, but, of course, back then, she couldn't have—she didn't have one; they were all in the big business. But, back then, she went to school, and she worked hard, and see this shirt here? That's her school colors: blue and white, because, uhh, at high school... she was a cheerleader. [does a generic cheerleader impression] Ram, bam, sick-oom-bah, yay, yay, fa-la-la. Yeah... one time, when she was a cheerleader in high school, she got... tackled by a football player. Broke her ankle. And, ever since then, she could no longer do the twist. Anyways, like I said, it was in her cheerleader years. Batons and pom-poms on her umbrella. Oh, and, by the way, y'know, I forgot to mention, for—I put the trumpets and bot—batons here. I used Mario Paint to design one set, then I multiplied it times four on Animal Crossing, 'cuz, a—uhh, Mario Paint stamp is equal to one-quarter of a whole Animal Crossing stamp. By the way, this is a daisy shirt she's wearing.
Anyway, uhh, she a—she also lodged—likes plants, so she kept ones... around... then and now. And she also liked to, uhh, play games, so there's a knight (?) here. Yeah. She also had, uhh, classic furniture in her room, and, uhh, around the house, because, uhh, it belonged to her parents, so here's a hutch. Yeah. So, anyway, let's go up to, uhh, her room, that she shared with a few of her sisters. Yeah. Like I said, she shared her room with her sisters, so we got a big bed. See that? More than one person can sleep in it. But, of course, in the lil' room of her's... she, uhh, does things hard, so she does a lot of work. Not only does she work outside, but she worked inside. She made clothes. So... here's a sewing machine at the back. And, of course, she worked hard when she went to school, [what sounds like a fart noise], so she, err, had a lot of writing to do. And, to line up her making clothes, the, uhh, she made—prob'ly made a dolly or two. And here's a couple of her fine designs.
Anyway, she keep—she kept her clothes in her, uhh, closets, as well as the, uhh, fabrics that she used. Although, y'know, back in her day, I'm surprised she did not get her fabrics mixed up with her clothes, because, if she wore the real fabrics, well... wouldn't have covered much. Anyway, 'course, she likes to keep pretty, so, uhh, she always liked [in a baby voice] to have a widdle fun in de miwwah. So, anyway, uhh, we're gonna head downstairs for, uhh, a lil' set part in the, uhh, days of old. This would be what you would call a, uh, kitchen-slash-dining room. "Hey, soup's onn. Who wants soup?" Yea—oh, yeah, she also likes to hold st—get old stuff as well, so she got a lil' tea-set here. And, uhh, we got a kitchen... fridge... and a stove.... Here's a lil' fan to keep cool with. Keep food in this lil', uhh, pantry. And she keeps her brooms and mops in the old closet, here. Although, somebody brought out the mop; somebody wanted to clean up. You put your garbage in the garbage can. And this is sad part. An' you get—an' sometim—in some places, now, and, uhh, very few houses, now, they will quite happily in the, uhh, old days, the bathroom was in the same room as the kitchen. But, luckily, we always remember to wash our hands with soap an' water. Yeah.... Anyway, that's just in the days of old. Nowadays, she does have a private bathroom. Yep. Anyway, she's better off now than she was in the old days... because, uhh, we'll time-travel forward. Yeah, and now we're going to time-travel forward to the present here.
Yep, back to the present we is. But, like I said... uhh, Mom and Dad, they, uhh, met each other. Oh, yeah I forgot to tell you how they met. Let's go back into Father's house and sssee how it... was. They met over at May's pub, see? Yeah. Maw was just, uhh, sittin' down with her friend, and she was watching, uhh, Bobby, uhh, sing up here. Anyway, she liked—she really liked his, uhh, singing, so, uhh, sh—as Father put it, she went up to him, an' then, uhh, as he passed by to change the Ther—change the Thermo—Thermostat, yeah.... Anyway, she chased him down a hallway... and cornered him. And, then, uhh, after that, they just talked till, uhh—they just talked things out and, uhh, eg—got to know each other. Found common things. But, in 1980, they did get married. But that was Father's side of the story, the "chasing down the hallways" thing, because Mom says that's not exactly right. Anyway, this is where they met, over here May's pub. And there's a lil' thing you couldn't have without flash plastic milling machines. Trash can.
So, anyway, this, umm, ahh, this day that this video will be shown, but from day this recorded, tomorrow, I mean it was yesterday this was recorded, yeah. That these two were wed, so it was like, twenty-four years ago today that this video was shown—is shown, that—that the pre—that the, uhh, Priest said, "Bob, do you take this woman to be lubbidy-wedded wife? To lub and hold and cherish and to honor?"
[In a stupid voice] "OI DOO"
"And do you, Barbara, take this man to be your lawfully-wedded husband? To love and cherish and honor forever?"
[In a voice reminiscent of GLaDOS] "I doo"
"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride."
Whoopee! Happy day, lay her again. And now let's take a look at the, umm, house, that love brought us. See? Here's the family room, although, uhh, above the downstairs that Mom and Dad share. They brought everything with them between the, uhh, something old, something borrowed, something new, something blue. Well, there's a lil' blue there in the, uh, barber's pole. A lil' something old from Dad's house. And now, of course, Father will watch television and fall asleep on this... comfy chair... when it's night. Of course, he's awake during the day. And Mom will, uhh, she'll sometimes sleep on the couch. And of course, they, uhh, sleep in the bed here. Big enough for two. And they have a computer to surf the web with. And, uhh, we used to have a player piano.... Let us play.
[messes on with piano and radio—plays the (shitty) "Sonic theme song" tune from Part 1]
[quietly] Hold on a second. ...(???) and there's no music on from another source.
That's the ticket.
Part 3
| The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special Part 2 | |
| Stardate | 07 June,2004 |
| Subject Matter | Video games; Relatives
|
| Performance Style | Reason
|
| Other | Machinima; Leaked
|
| OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos | |
| previous The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special Part 2 |
next So Need a Cute Girl |
| “ | HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! THANK YOU BOTH FOR MY BIRTH! | ” |
| Chris | ||
Transcript
...Anyway, when... first comes love, then comes marriage, then they come along with their baby carriage. And that's where I came in. Born in February 1982 was me. Yeah, two years after they got—uhh, this—less than two years after they got married. So, anyway, this is my bedroom, and my, uhh, TV, and video games. I'd have an entertainment center, but they didn't have one of those here in Animal Crossing. I had to make do. But it's a big TV, and I got a nice bed, a love couch. Oh, my first video game system was a Commodore Sisty-Four, here. Good computer it was; had some great games on it. Of course, I would have to say my second system after this would be the original Game Boy. Yeah, but, anyway, I kept my videos—I keep my video games, nowadays, because I got lots of 'em, on shelves... and stuff.
Anyway, I got my room decorated with a bunch of posters. Yeah, look at all these posters. Yeah, of course, you got my bed here, it's my favorite color: blue. Yeah, along with the few video games, we have more video games down here in the basement. Of course, in real world, down here in the basement-slash-utility room, it'd be Father's records. But in he—in Animal Crossing, got all my N—got my NES collection down here. Oh, look at this, I caught an Angel fish. This is an Angel fish. Oh, and here's a model. It's a space shuttle. Yeah.
Anyway, uhh, now we're gonna take a trip back to, uhh, Father's house for a specialo... deal. As a lil' retribution for, ahh, how things were, we're gonna play a lil' number on the jukebox here, but, since we don't have "Side by Side" on recording, we're play—we're gonna play... "Sittin' Under the Apple Tree".
[Old jazz comes on]
[Song: Don't Sit Under the Apple Tree - Glenn Miller]
"Don't sit under the apple tree with anyone else but me,
Anyone else but meee,
Oooh, anyone else but me, no, no, no,
Don't sit under the apple tree with anyone else but me,
'Til I come marchin' home,
Don't go walkin' down lover's lane with anyone else but me,
Anyone else but meee,
Anyone else but meee, no, no, no,
Don't go walkin' down lover's lane with anyone else but me,
'Til I come marchin' home,
I just got word from the guy who heard,
From the guy next door to meee,
The girl he met just loves to pet,
And it fits you to a T,
So, don't sit under the apple tree with anyone else but me,
'Til I come marchin' hoooome,
Don't give out with those lips of yours to anyone else but me,
Anyone else but me, anyone else but me, no, no, no,
Watch those girls on foreign shores, you'll have to report to me,
When you come marchin' home,
Don't hold anyone on your knee, you better be true to me,
You better be true to me, you better be true to me,
Don't hold anyone on your knee, you're gettin' the third degree,
When you come marchin' home,
You're on your own where there is no phone,
And I can't keep tabs on you,
Be fair to me, I'll guarantee,
This is one thing that I'll do,
I won't sit under the apple tree with anyone else but you,
'Til you come marchin' home,
Don't sit under the apple tree with anyone else but me,
I know the apple tree is reserved for you and meee,
And I'll be true 'til you come marchin' hoooome.
And there you have a nice lil' classic jazz. Now, we're gonna take a trip back up here. Now, we're back outside. And now for, uhh, my mom and dad, a little something special for this, uhh, video. This my way of saying "Happy Anniversary" to y'all. Coming up next—
[A shitty Mario Paint rendition of "Happy Birthday" plays.]
[A big multi-layered cake with the words "HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! THANK YOU BOTH FOR MY BIRTH! Christian C." scrawled across each layer with Sonichus in the background.]
Yeah. I love you both. Thank y'all for givin' birth to me, y'know. So, now, we're gonna pretty much end this documentary special. [inaudible mumbling] Okay here it is.
[sings to the tune of the Finale from the William Tell Overture]
♪ Happy anniversary, happy ann-i-vers-a-ry, happy anniversary, haaaapy anniversary. Lalalalalalalalalala laaa laaaa! Lalalalalalalalala laa laaa laaaa! OHHHH! Happy anniversary, happy ann-i-vers-a-ry, happy anniversary, haaaapy anniversary. Dudududududududu doh dohhh! Ladadadadada doh dohhhhhhh! Happy anniversary, happy ann-i-vers-a-ry, happy anniversary, haaaapy anniversary! Dududududududududu dooo dooo doooooo. Lududududu dooo doooo. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. ♪
'Til the next time. Goodnight, folks! Thank you, and good night.
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