That Goatee WILL Grow Back

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That Goatee WILL Grow Back (officially Christian Weston Chandler - It Took Me Weeks to Perfect that Goatee, but it WILL Grow Back) is a video from 31 July 2009, in which Chris tries to go back to his old self to address concerns that he's an impostor based on the fact he doesn't wear his medallion, striped shirts, and having a goatee.

In it, Chris fails at shaving while Lift Up Your Eyes by Planetshakers plays in the background for emotional effect. Because, you know, it's definitely not creepy to violently shave yourself to Christian pop-rock.

If Chris was smart and taught how to shave properly, he would have used shaving cream (or at least some olive oil), soap, a mirror (which he got rid of to deter homosexual urges), and water, but because he's Chris he will have to put up with razor burn for the next two weeks.

Video

Christian Weston Chandler - It Took Me Weeks to Perfect that Goatee, but it WILL Grow Back
Stardate 31 July 2009
Performance Style Crazy.png Crazy
Saga Liquid saga.png Liquid
Shirt Classicshirt.png The Classic
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Transcript

[CWC removes his glasses and speaks inaudibly to the camera as "Lift Up Your Eyes" by the Christian church music group, "Planetshakers" plays over him. He puts his glasses down, removes his waistcoat and takes off a medallion inscribed with the phase "THE TIME OF MY LIFE" which he shows to the camera and then discards. Using a safety razor but no cream he begins taking vertical and horizontal swipes across his chin with alarming force. The head comes loose from the handle and falls to the ground. He picks it back up, reattaches it and resumes. After a few more stokes he does this again. After further scraping he seems to put this razor down and pick up a new one. The head falls off yet again and he reattaches it and continues. After more shaving he stops to check for unshaven areas, he then resumes, checks, resumes, checks, finds it to his satisfaction and the video ends.]