Jail Letter - 10 December 2021

On 10 December 2021, Chris sent his third letter to Eels and the Egg-man from jail. Eels would not reveal the letter until 9 July 2022, and had only provided a summary of its contents.

Eels's Letter

{{quoteboxred|Thank you for sending me back again, it really warms the cuckles (get it like knuckles) of my heart to hear you writing me back I'm sorry to hear you're still in that jail, I really really thought they'd have let you out of that place by now. I hope my "straight to the point, here are our questions" format is acceptable.

1.) You mentioned year zero? I understand this is some sort of satanic thing based on the lyrics to the song Year Zero, by the Swedish black metal band Ghost/Ghost BCO Were you battling demons like Asmodeus (the wicked half demon brother of Solomon) Lucifer (the devil/samael/satan) behemoth and belial (the father of all nosferatu)

2.) I'm something of a lonely head, will things be different after the dimensional merge? Is there any chance you could introduce me to psylocke/kwannon, cammy white, jean grey, poison ivy/pamela isley, starlight/annie january, tifa lockheart,bloodrayne, scarlett/shanna o'hara, lucy heafflla, d va, widowmaker and or nami? My second nephew jeremy is being teased in middle school for not having a girlfriend could you maybe introduce him to Aska Langty soriyu, sailor mars, rikku or sailor mercury?

3.) You keep talking in letters made public about how we shouldnt believe fanfiction? Are you saying the whole phone call where you admitted to having sex with barbera weston chandler ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ confirming the same thing didnt happen? That the whole you banging your mom was some kind of fanfiction that was warped into existing in reality? Are you saying it was retconned and didn't happen?

4.) What is the cost of paper, stamps, envelope, pens, and pencils in jail? Also are we allowed to send in blank paper and or blank envelopes inside letters?

5.) Since you are the literal reincamation of Jesus, what do you think of the situation in Israel/the west bank/gaza strip? Do you think the Israelis are treating the Palastinians fairly? Since this is your homeland I was wondering what you'd have to say. I know a lot of people think that the Palestinians were wrongfully removed from their homeland by the Israelis and they are trying to force all of them out.

6.) I was wondering if you had anything to say regarding george mcfloyd the black man who was kneed on the neck to death by police while he was in custody? His son %rtin is heart broken :(

7.) What was your take on the insurrection of january 6th 2021 , where Donald Trump's supporters tried to take over America after the former president's ungracious loss.

8.) Kyle Rittenhouse the guy who went to a counter protest of black lives matter after a black man who was a wife beater was gunned down by the police was acquitted of killing 2 protestors who attacked him with guns, skateboards and a charging attack. Do you think this was justified? Kyle illegally possessed a gun without a permit, traveled into a state where his gun wasn't legal, fled the scene of an accident and was out after curfew. He was acquitted of all his wrong doings? What's your opinion on his conviction or lack thereof?

9.) What do you think of the covid-19 pandemic? A Lot of people think the coronavirus isnt real and is just a conspiracy? That it's no more dangerous than the flu. Many people wish to "reopen america!" More troubling is that many people (including close friends and family members of mine) think that the vaccine is dangerous as it was supposedly "rushed out without enough testing, and not FDA approved" they have refused to get exist.

Other conspiracies keep circulating such as the vaccine IEing the mark of the beast from the of revelations, the vaccine sterilizes young wornen, the vaccine causes autism and the vaccine kills you in 5 years. What do you think of covid-19 and the vaccine? A few family ræmbers of mine refuse to get vaccinated because the church they belong to hasn't sanctioned the vacane. They are extreme devout trump supporters that followed trumps doctrine to the letter and keep insisting the pandemic is one big hoax and made up by the liberal media in soæ kind of 4D chess scheme so that the democrats can eize power and take their guns and abortion rights away. 10.) Senator Majory Taylor Green has declared that the 9/11 terrorist attacks never actually happened and the world trade center still stands? I found these comments to say fre least? But could this be connected to the dimensional merge? Was 9/11 retconned into not happening like the sex with barb? Does that mean the people who died that day are alive and people can go back to their jobs for the world trade organization? 11.) Internet infarnous person jessca yaniv is suing a nail salon for refusing to wax her testides. She is faking trans in an attempt to make a frivolous lawsuit and hurting the trans community. Do you have an opinion on this? 12.) Former nickelodeon producer dan schiender and nusician marilyn manson were recently charged with sex against minors? What do you think should happn to them? The jail you're in seems to have had its website shut down for fre last several weeks. It doesnt look like we can donate to you online. I would have sent some money but wasnt sure of the procedure of donating via sending to you directly and if it was legal or not. Some slanderous trolls accused your mentioning of "meditating" being code for "masterbating" something you should be aware of, you may need to address in the future. Are you aware of a third person who failed their test? There was a youtuber, whom you admitted to •soul bonding" with. They messaged you and you asked them not to share the admission of guilt and they shared it with the internet. It was not Null, nor was it Bella. It was someone who makes youtube videos that you were in contact with? Do you know who Ürn talking about? Sincerely, ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ I was getting rid of some old books and was wondering if you wanted any of them I could mai them to you. They are as follows: The Book of Mormon by Joseph Smith, The Lesser Key of Solomon by Unknown Author, The Testament of Solomon by Unknown Author, The Simon Necronomicon also by Unknown Author (101 people really dont know who wrote these), the Talmud (Jewish equivalent of the bible, similar to the torah or old testarnent but contains omitted material) and the Book of the Law by Aleister Crowley. I'm also visiting some relativ and might be able to get the following books for you as well: American Psycho by Brent Eas Ellis, Sonic fre Hedgehog, Sonic the Fortress of fear and Sonic the Hedgehog.

Eels's Summary

Marked december 10th 2021 Most of tie letter is just Chris' Wpical "I'M JESUS!!!"' nonsense with nothing "juicy", The letter is boring and nothing in regards to his imprisonment, his "affair with mother", Bella, his arrest, or anything like that gets mentioned -Year 0 refers to tt-e year tie real jesus was bom and has nothing to do with the ghost -he denounces Israers unjust treatment of the palestinians denounces the conspiracy theories regarding the COVID-19 Vaccine, he says it won't hurt you and to get your shot -chris ignores all of my funny questions deeming them "trivial and moot" -chris attempts to start drama with a youtuber, whom he has never npt or heard of (l attempted to coyly ask in a previous letter if chris knew if dillian thomas him out without asking him directly as that would be telling him that info he might not have krwwn, Chris took a massive leap in logic thinking all of the youtubers I had ræntioned were somet-ww responsible for his imprisonment and made threats against them saying theyre •gang down' and will "pay for what they have done') -chris begins using the -slur -neurotypicals- to insult and disparage non-autistic people (apparently autistic people are better than non-autistic people) -claims that meditation is not for masterbating -wants me to personally deliver a drawing (a picture of chris chan sonichu meditating with a 3rd eye in outer space, which i honestly wanna keep for myself and maybe get frarned 101) to this youtuber as a way to "humble them' and or 'bring them down' Chris was upset about my trouy bullshit questions and I ultimately learned the lesson to mly ask sorta serious questions to chris about chris if i want legit respnses.

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Eels's Letter

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