Soul Calibur

Ivy's namesake on the cover of Soul Calibur III (in the background)

Transcending picklesauce and Ruckersville, a tale of ducks and chinas, eternally retold.

Chris, recreated in full Hamburglar regalia in Soul Calibur V.

Soul Calibur (often written SoulCalibur or Soulcalibur) is a weapon-fighting game franchise created by Namco. While the series has a hardcore following, it's also famous for being easy to pick up – perhaps too easy, if Chris is of any indication.

The series and Chris

Chris's favorite character is Cassandra Alexandra, possibly for no other reason besides the fact that he favors attractive female characters in all other games. Mimms also said that he used Cassandra in the UFS trading card game and Megan encouraged him to stick with the "Greek girls" (Cassandra and Sophitia) in UFS.

In the infamous facerape scene of Episode 17 of the comic, Rosechu seems to duplicate Sophitia's B+G throw, called "Angel's Heaven" (Soul Edge) or "Holy Cracker" (Soulcalibur series proper). It could also be "Heaven to Hell," which can follow up this move. However, Sophitia's attacks had several advantages over Rosechu's attack. First, cracking the neck is generally faster and more lethal than clawing a head open and electrocuting the victim. Secondly, Sophitia cleverly performed this attack fully clothed, granting the series 16+ age ratings rather than Cannot Be Unseen ratings. Thirdly, Sophitia cleverly elected to not shout some of the most embarrassing battlecries in the history of feminism.

Chris loved to create his enemies in Soul Calibur III and make pathetic videos where he struggles to beat them on the lowest difficulty setting. He has threatened to do this to various people, including the fan artist Evan and anyone who dared draw a pickle on his female cartoon characters.

In the Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles ad, Chris promises CWC and Sonichu-related DLC for Soul Calibur IV. With the most advanced boob physics to date this series has seen, the public at large would probably rather not see that pack come to fruition. (Unless Mary Lee Walsh is included, naturally.)

Soul Megan

Apparently he and Megan Schroeder were dedicated players of the arcade version, too, judging by e-mails discussing the purchasing of horribly overpriced weapon and ability cards to be used with the coin-op game.

One aspect of Chris's Megan obsession included creating a character of Megan in the game, which reportedly gave her the creeps.

“

And I don't like your "Megan Obsession" I don't like being a character in your comics. I don't like how you made me a character in Soulcalibur and Animal Crossing. That kind of behavior really freaks me out.

”

Chris vs Mary Lee Walsh

This article is rated M for Honest Content It may contain content deemed not safe for work. Reader discretion is advised.

This video is notable for being the first known video Chris ever uploaded to YouTube.

“

The EPIC Battle between the High-Functioning Autistic Warrior who was only searching for TRUE LOVE, and the EVIL WITCH of the Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens who previously SHATTERED HIS HEART AND SOUL by making it OBVIOUS that it was ILLEGAL to have a Sweetheart of the opposite gender in Virginia... "VIRGINIA IS FOR VIRGINS!"

”

SOUL CALIBUR: Chris vs Mary Lee Walsh
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Search for video	YouTube, archive
Stardate	1 May 2007
Subject Matter	Video games Video Games, Violence Violence
Performance Style	Rage Rage, Crazy Crazy
Other	Machinima Machinima
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
previous Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE	next Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown

See also

• CWC Fighter
• Ivy, who got her name from Isabella "Ivy" Valentine

External links

• Original file

⇐ Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE

Chris's videos

Master Onion A-La Mode ⇒