Alcohol

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Ever since getting married to Rosechu, Sonichu finds that Reeb helps dull the pain.

Like shoving things up his ass, alcohol was something that Chris used to preach against until he tried it and discovered he loved the pleasant effect.

Background

Finally Loosened up and flew to Long Island June 12, 2009. Keep It Responsible; ONLY One in a day, or 7 or less in all in a week. (Quote from CWCipedia)

He considered alcohol a "slow-acting poison" in his Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE video. Alcohol is also mentioned in Vivitheg's AIM chat, where in line 309, he mentions that he would not go to a singles bar because of it (and cigarettes). When asked about it in Mumble Chat 2, he stated that it "causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents".

Chris delivered a particularly effusive tirade in one of his e-mails to Reggie Fils-Aimé:

“	ALSO, I BET YOU PROBABLY SMOKE AND DRINK, don't you? I SPEAK AGAINST THOSE AS WELL SINCE THEY ARE TOOLS TO SPEED YOU TO DEATH WITH CANCER, LIVER PROBLEMS, BAR FIGHTS AND AUTOMOBILE ACCIDENTS. GIVE UP THE HABITS! THEY ARE BEYOND GROSS AND DISGUSTING!	”
Chris, to Reggie, early in 2009.

Discovery

Despite this, a video of Chris drinking a Long Island Iced Tea was uploaded to YouTube on 12 June 2009, perhaps showing us Chris will be willing to throw all his principles out the window when chances of being around a female arise.

At some subsequent point, Chris also discovered cheap beer. Budweiser is apparently his brand of choice, based on eyewitness reports from Fridays After Five and his account of a trip to a bar prior to visiting the GAMe PLACe on 6 June 2010. Meanwhile, a video from mid-October 2010 showed Chris slugging Kahlúa liqueur straight from the bottle, although he didn't seem to enjoy it too much.

When a correspondent in Mailbag 6 challenged him regarding his shift in attitude, Chris replied, "I discourage underage drinking fully; I wanted to try it once for myself."

In Mailbag 16, from December 2009, he described his drinking habits in more detail: "I am more of a Social Drinker; I generally do NOT spend a weekly amount on drinks; I only drink at like a party or with a friend on rare ocassions." (This remark was met with some skepticism from trolls, since based on all the available evidence Chris has no friends who would invite him to parties.)

Even after discarding his original hard-line attitude, though, Chris still found opportunities to get a little preachy regarding the demon liquor. In Mailbag 33, from early January 2010, he remarked, "And Alcohol; in Responsible, Moderate amounts, it can be good for you, yet I do not support Too Much of it, as if left unchecked, unresponsible or unassisted, too much can lead to fights that can lead to a trip to the hospital and automobile accidents." He also, in Mailbag 5, advanced the bizarre theory that drinking while pregnant "CAN PROVOKE homosexuality in the child."

Hypocrisy

The citizens of CWCville themselves, however, are forced to consume only CWC Cola, a cola made with Chris's secret ingredient.

Chandler family and alcohol

It is interesting to note that Cole Smithey mentions that Bob and Barbara Chandler met at a bar and acted like a couple of drunken losers.

The Chandler family line has an (unsurprising) history with alcohol. Chris's maternal great-grandfather, Robert Pettis Wynn, "drank heavily and had a girlfriend during the time he was married. Family stories say he failed to provide even the most basic support for his wife and children ...there are others who say he was a moonshiner."

In the comic

Reeb is the official drink of Kick the Autistic.

A worker at 4-cent_garbage.com downing a relaxing can of Reeb.

In Sonichu Chris refers to beer in all instances as "Reeb."

At first glance this seems odd, until you realize Chris still thinks Sonichu is targeted towards children (despite the hideous porn and violence), and so, he feels he must censor any mention of alcohol in the comic. This is a common theme in English-translated anime shows such as Dragon Ball Z and Pokémon.

Possessing or drinking alcohol was also one of the worst crimes to commit in CWCville, and could have led to a $1,500 fine or ten years in prison (the fact that Chris thinks that ten years in prison and a $1,500 fine are interchangeable is indicative of his broader attitude towards money). It is also interesting to note that this punishment is much more lenient than the CWCville penalty for homosexuality. And you thought Chris was intolerant.

In his Rollin' and Trollin' video he announced that the prohibition had been repealed. Hopefully this will curb the bootlegging mafiosi who held the city in a grip of pleasant distraction from the horrors of being ruled by Christian Weston Chandler.

"Reeb" is the drink of choice for the drunkards at 4-cent_garbage.com.

Alcoholism?

It is speculated that Chris's introduction to alcohol held some consequence in his life. As evidenced by the Chris's Big Night Out videos, Chris's introduction to alcohol was a mostly positive experience for him. His introduction to the drug effects was in conjunction with (as far as our knowledge goes) with his first night enjoying an adult experience Chris was not accustomed to. Alcohol was mentioned briefly in a video shortly after, titled I'm Sorry, Dude. In this video, Chris makes an offer to treat Logan to drinks; as opposed to his past offers of "coffee or soda" to those whom he wanted to get to know. Alcohol was briefly revisited again on camera in Chris's Big Night Out II, where Chris was seen drinking. Chris's first recorded video where he appeared visibly intoxicated in Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls. Alcohol began a slow and steady progression into Chris's life; this was made obvious by the numerous references to drinks in the recent e-mails that have surfaced. In 6 June 2010, Chris revealed that he drives and attempts vehicular assault after drinking.

Alcohol may be contributing to the declining health of Christian. Since his decision to leave the internet and went about seeking real life interaction with other people, Chris has revealed to us that he spends most of his day sitting in bars and playing Nintendo DSi. While once claiming to be a "Social Drinker", it is becoming quite obvious that Christian is anything but. Christian's childlike perception of the world is most likely deafening his awareness to the substance's advancement of relevancy in his life. At this point, Christian is most likely turning to alcohol for escapism. "I went over to a bar, and I had a Bud. A bottle of Bud. And I p- and then I played some solitaire on my DS, while I- while I waited to the- uh, while I waited to the hour." It is obvious that with Chris's current loneliness and depression, his alcohol use will yield repercussions in his life.

See also

• Bob Chandler and Barbara Chandler
• 4-cent garbage.com, where the workers often drink reeb
• Captain's Log, Stardate October 27th, 2008, where the CWCville crime is mentioned
• Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE, where he gives "advice" on the subject