OfficialCWCmart

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PROTIP:

Buying items from Chris is not recommended, knowing his history of financial irresponsibility, neglect, and failure to keep customers' information private, as well as Praetor's history of shady behavior.
(Editor's Note: All descriptions, titles, and product designs come directly from Chris Chan. These are hand done, and will therefore reflect the "Chris Chan Style." Expect defects, burns, and a general lapse in quality.)
Praetor's Etsy account, confirming that the products being shipped will be dogshit, even by Chris's standards.

OfficialCWCmart is an Etsy storefront operated by Praetor, who are partnered with Chris to sell items.

Below are listings which have appeared on the shop.

First Items

Official Chris Chan Sonichu Medallion (1st Run)

For a limited time you can get these, the very first approved, certified, and personally blessed Sonichu medallions. If you have bought a medallion from any place other than Chris Chan, now you have the chance to actually buy the only official personally approved medallions. These are the first run of the mass-produced Christine Weston Chandler medallions. Limited quantity; order now!

(Editor's Note: All descriptions, titles, and product designs come directly from Chris Chan. These are hand done, and will therefore reflect the "Chris Chan Style." Expect defects, burns, and a general lapse in quality.)

Sonichu medallion etsy dec 2020.jpg

Chris advertised the run on Twitter on 11 December 2020.[2] The medallions are of a much worse quality than those produced only by Chris, and have received backlash from weens and concerned fans. Chris told them to count their blessings and assured them they will be of high quality, despite the page selling the medallions stating that "these are hand done, and will therefore reflect the "Chris Chan Style." Expect defects, burns, and a general lapse in quality."

Golden Church of Sonichu Medallion (1st Run)

*Handmade

The Golden Medallion, featuring:

- Limited Run Golden Sonichu Medallion - Autographed Certificate of Authentication, straight from the printer of Christine Chandler herself

Own today the rarest run of Medallions to date, and get access to the Glorious Golden Church of Sonichu. Join our discord to aid in projects, hear Words of Wisdom from our Goddess, and gain membership into the Church itself. To join, simply purchase a medallion and send the four digit access code included on the certificate to llcpraetor [!at] gmail.com, or send us a message on Etsy.

Join the only True and Honest group around. Join The Golden Church.

Meditation Stones

Meditation Stones
  • Handmade
  • Vintage from the 1900s
  • Materials: Rocks, Burlap, Stones, Crystals

These are Meditation Crystals accompanied by stones from the One and Only Temple, Goddess Christine Weston Chandler's home, All of which are imbued with Christine’s energy and Rainbow Aura. Also includes Certificates of Authenticity with Christine’s signature. Contains one meditation crystal and 4-6 stones from the temple.

On 29 May 2021, the price of the rocks and crystals were lowered to $20. The description of the listing was also updated to say that one buyer would supposedly get a free book about Chris and Andy Warhol.

For a limited time, one gem pack will also come with a copy of Don Lashomb's "Warhol/Chris Chan," a novel about the Goddess. Buy now for your chance to win!

Jail Saga Items

Medallions

Official Chris Chan Sonichu Medallion (Final Run) (2nd run)
After Christine Chandler's arrest, the store was closed and all remaining merchandise was put in storage either within the Chandler residence or within a rented storage cube. While the waters calmed, there the medallions sat. Waiting.

After much conversation with Christine, these medallions have been brought back to be sold, taken off our hands and hearts. Until the point that Christine is released or made publicly accessible again, no others will be produced. These are the last ones.

Below is a small recorded message from Christine endorsing these medallions.

[links to Official Chris Chan Sonichu Medallion audio]

God be with ye in these trying times.

Sonichu Medallion, Handmade by CWC (1st run)

In contrast to the regular medallions, these medallions were apparently made by Chris. The medallions are of a noticeably different style compared to their cheaper counterparts and are adorned with Chris's signature on the back, so their description may very well be truthful.

A handcrafted medallion was included with each purchase of "Golden Church of Sonichu Cult Robes." The robes came in two sizes. Red robes were large, while blue robes were extra large. No smaller sizes were offered, as "Golden Church members were assumed to be naturally, uh, large people."[11] A yellow mask with red Sonichu-style cheeks was also bundled with each robe.

A handmade and autographed medallion by Christine Chandler herself.

These were made in a matter of only a couple months before the arrest. In preparation for the release of a Chris Chan twitch channel and the eventual release of a new comic we had gotten him to begin making, these medallions were meant to be a new wave of merch. Unfortunately, both the channel and comic were promptly cut short for obvious reasons.

Below is a link to a recorded part of a phone call with CWC, endorsing said medallions. [links to Sonichu Medallion, Handmade by CWC audio]

Getting Christine to make new medallions was very difficult. This effort will not be wasted. Buy one today, and receive enlightenment.

In a later relisting, Praetor noted:[10]

(NOTE: Christine Chandler packed the majority of these herself. Multiple reviews have mentioned finding hairs/odd smells on packages. We cannot guarantee whether your package will be ever truly sanitary, as we do not open them to preserve Christine's products best as possible. Enjoy your extra flavor bits.)
Megastone Medallions, made by CWC

The most expensive of the medallions, the megastone medallions were a variant of the handcrafted medallions. In addition to being signed by Chris, the back of the medallions contained a "megastone" which Chris verbally claimed to "have personally blessed and programmed each and every one of." As such, wearers could "really […] feel the spiritual aura and charge and vibrations within."

These medallions are much like the standard medallions Chris Chan made, with the addition of a Megastone for channeling power in their backs. This makes them nearly identical to the original Sonichu Medallion worn by Christine, and very unique in this fashion.

These were made in a matter of only a couple months before the arrest. In preparation for the release of a Chris Chan twitch channel and the eventual release of a new comic we had gotten him to begin making, these medallions were meant to be a new wave of merch. Unfortunately, both the channel and comic were promptly cut short for obvious reasons.

Below is a link to a recording of Christine endorsing the medallions.

[links to Megastone Medallions, made by CWC audio]

Getting Christine to make new medallions was very difficult. This effort will not be wasted. Buy one today, and receive enlightenment.

Golden Church of Sonichu Medallion (2nd run)

After Chris was arrested, the Golden Church of Sonichu Discord server became inactive. A second wave of Golden Sonichu Medallions, this time unsigned and not created by Chris, were listed in 2022. These golden medallions did not come with a code to join the Discord, but still came with a printed Certificate of Authentication.

The Golden Medallion, featuring:

-Autographed Golden Sonichu Medallion -Autographed Certificate of Authentication, straight from the printer of Christine Chandler herself

This is the last of the golden medallions. After Christine's arrest, all extra merchandise from the store was put in storage either at the Chandler Residence or in a local storage rental shed. As the waters have quieted lately, we've brought what we have left out of hiding. The end of an era.

NOTE: When the Golden Medallions were first introduced, they functioned as a ticket into Christine's Golden Sonichu Discord, the beginnings of her attempt at crowdfunding an actual church. This is no longer the case.

Golden Sonichu Medallion with Autograph (2nd run)

After Chris was arrested, the Golden Church of Sonichu Discord server became inactive. A second wave of Golden Sonichu Medallions, this time unsigned and not created by Chris, were listed in 2022. These golden medallions did not come with a code to join the Discord, but still came with a printed Certificate of Authentication.

This is a new run of Golden Church of Sonichu Medallions, mass produced under Christine's direction for the Etsy store. Fans may remember that before the Jail Saga Chris sold these medallions as a means to enter his private discord, the Golden Church of Sonichu. As his views on his universe grew more theocratic he began to push to have his followers take a more reverent tone with him, hence the religious name.

To raise funds for important spiritual icons like Discord Nitro, Golden Medallions were sold with numbers and autographs on them. Buyers could send the numbered code into our email to get a link to Christine's discord church. After the arrest the Discord was abandoned, and obviously no longer included Christine.

As such no medallions sold will gain access to the discord. However, each still comes with a signed authentication certificate from Christine. These were printed and signed by her in bulk, as they are meant to supplement multiple kinds of merchandise.

[PACKAGE INCLUDES]
-One unsigned Golden Medallion
-One autographed authentication certificate

NewGoldenMedallionEtsy.jpg

Jail Art

Main article: Praetor Jail Art

Chris has created original drawings during his stay in jail and given them to Praetor to sell, beginning in early 2022. Chris continued to send art to Praetor even after his case was sealed in August 2022, making them the only outside individuals with whom he has had confirmed contact since then. However, Chris has not sent out any new drawings since 26 November 2022.

Golden Church of Sonichu Cult Robe

  • Listed: 25 March 2022
  • Price: $100 (sold out)[16][17]
  • Options: [RED, LARGE], [BLUE, EXTRA LARGE]
Before Christine's arrest, she requested that robes be purchased to make her a more regal outfit befitting her human form. We naturally enthusiastically agreed, and set about purchasing robes that followed her very specific instructions.

She requested that red and blue robes be brought about, to match the classic CWC shirt pattern. These robes would then be sent to her most devoted followers within her Golden Church of Sonichu discord. Masks were suggested and added to the garb for follower anonymity.

Christine's personal robe was to be white, adorned with crystals and talismans. When the robes arrived, they had incredibly pointed hoods as can be seen in the pictures. For obvious reasons, Christine's robes were scrapped and a new design began to be debated.

When Christine was arrested, the robes were just about prepared. They had to come under storage, as followers of the Golden Church scattered like roaches. Now here they are, brought back to light.

NOTE: 1 OF EACH COLOR LEFT

-Red Robe w/hood
-Sonichu Mask
-Rope Belt
-Handmade by CWC herself, a signed Sonichu Medallion

Buy this most glorious outfit, and feel finally connected to our fallen goddess.

Chris Chan Arrowheads

Arrowheads collected by Christine Chandler, now available for sale!

Whether these are real Native American arrowheads is hard to say. Many may be aware of Chris Chan's unique relationship to the Cherokee people, which if anything fully authenticates these in our personal opinion.

Feel the Great Spirit move through you, buy today!

Chris Chan Rock Centerpiece

A favorite rock from Christine Chandler's collection. Buyers will receive this stone and all of the blessings/kisses Chris bestowed upon it.

Chris informed us he kissed this one an awful lot. We see this as a bonus.

Sacred Crystals from the CWC collection

Before the arrest, Christine had personally blessed and sanctioned certain rocks/crystals for sale. Coming to you out of storage in the CWC temple, the following crystals are included:

In order: rose quartz, moonstone, tourmaline, amythyst, and pyrite.

Bless up today.

Chris Chan's Sacred Fossils

These are a set of framed fossils from Chris Chan's rock/crystal collection. All 3 are included, along with case.

Christine's divine influence is as ancient as these fossils. Now you too can feel the power.

Christine Chandler's Fidget Spinner

A fidget spinner from Christine. Did she make it? Was it willed into existence by her divine power, to sit and aid her in her musings?

Maybe. Buy it, and see if it works its magic.

Chris Chan Taser

Recent Christorians may recall the Taser Incident, where the Praetor group while working with Christine posted images of tasers onto their respective Instagrams and Twitters. Through leaked chats and discussion, it was hypothesized that the Praetor group was planning to tase Chris on video. This lead to a flurry of drama and doxing, and the tasers were forgotten.

The tasers had originally been intended for sale, as signed ones would be put out for purchase. To negate negative attention, they were boxed and stored away to wait until the smoke cleared. Now, these zappy little buggers are available for sale once again!

Each Taser is hand signed by Christine herself, emblazoned with her autograph and the iconic phrase "Zappin' it Up!" Per Christine's suggestion.

Now you too can zap it to the extreme. Handle with care, while these are collectables they can be recharged and may have residual charge left over.

Package comes with: -Autographed Taser -Charging cable

The Secret Listing

This listing was taken down earlier. This item features an authentic Chandler autograph, but we cannot go into detail due to Etsy policy guidelines. For more info, please DM us here on Etsy or at IIcpraetor [!at] gmail.com.

Thank you.

It was revealed in the March 2023 Praetor Interview that 'The Secret Listing' was in fact a Taser, put up as 'The Secret Listing' in hopes that Etsy wouldn't take it down.

Andy Warhol, Chris Chan: CWC signed copy

Dr. Don Lashomb writes this compelling novel, comparing artist Andy Warhol and visionary Christine Chandler. The parallels between them become uncanny.

This is a signed copy of the novel, autographed by Christine herself. Dr. Don calls Christine a misunderstood individual, who's art will only receive justice when it sells for millions. We're sure he still fully supports Christine, and love him for it.

Show Don your support here: https://donalashomb.wordpress.com/contact/

Custom Commissions: LIMITED NUMBER ACCEPTED

Christine has agreed to fulfill commissions in limited numbers. Drawings will be framed portraits done via letter paper. These are the guidelines as laid by Christine.

-Any subject accepted, not just Sonichu
-Christine can accept or reject drawings as she sees fit
-Drawings may not appear exactly as described. Expect possible error.

Time frames are extremely variable. You must relay your description to our page so I can relay it to Christine, who must draw the art and mail it back to me to pass to you. Expect longer wait times.

If any questions are had, please message our page.

Chris Chan Signed Certificate and Sonic Gfuel

Before Christine's arrest, the idea of selling a Chris Chan soda was tossed around. Chris came up with several flavors and ideas, even pitching a love potion of sorts involving spring water and hunks of easily digestible rose quartz. The most easily sellable idea we pitched back was "Cremé de Fanta", a tongue in cheek soda which would be poured into wine bottles, corked, labelled, and sold.

The recipe was Orange Fanta, Sonic Gfuel, Non-dairy cream, and a little flavorless gelatin powder for a more authentic consistency. We're sure you get the idea here.

After the arrest, much like most of the items we were prepping for sale this delicious beverage was scrapped. We now bring you some of the many cans kept in storage at Christine's home for the mixing of our drinks. Along with this we are including a pre-signed authentication certificate made by Christine.

NOTE: CANS ARE SEALED AND NOT SIGNED. ONLY CERTIFICATES ARE SIGNED, ONE CERTIFICATE PER CAN, ONE CAN PER PURCHASE

Temple of Sonichu Sacred Rocks (1st run)

These canvas sacks hold glorious gravel, hand-picked by Christine for distribution from her sacred driveway.

Each bag also holds 1-2 crystals/rocks from Chris's personal hoard for maximum blessing.

These were made ages ago for the original store. When the store closed due to Christine's arrest, they were stowed away. Now they have returned, just for you. Each includes a signed certificate from Christine authenticating the bag as filled with not just driveway gravel, but her love.

Post-Jail Saga Items

Post Jail Medallions

On 16 October 2023 Praetor began selling a new version of the handmade medallion, now autographed by "Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime", as well as a third run of the regular medallions.

Official Chris Chan Sonichu Medallion (3rd run)

Christine's return to the world heralds a new age, and these True and Authentic medallions will see you through such trying times.

Christine has stated a mission of spreading herself to as many people as possible, with these mass produced medallions being a method of delivery. Handcrafted to her specifications and with her blessing, these are made in Virginia on an assembly line hired and run by her and her alone.

The below message endorses these as having been touched by her magicks, and was recorded while incarcerated.

[links to Official Chris Chan Sonichu Medallion audio]

God be with ye in these trying times.

(NOTE: THESE DO NOT COME WITH CERTIFICATE OR AUTOGRAPH)

Sonichu Medallion, Handmade by CWC (2nd run)

A handmade and autographed medallion by Christine Chandler herself. The provided description comes from Chris directly:

"None more authentic, none more True and Honest. Produced by I, Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime, who have personally molded, painted and signed these select Sonichu Medallions even more personally blessed with Light Power, Righteousness and energies from the Core and Matrix of everything that exists in this Timeline and all of the other Timelines inspired and manifested from it. Feel the Divine and all powers with the share of energies I physically put into these. Also, to mention, all of the other Medallions that have been made and sold on this store have been personally blessed and authorized by I as well. You just get more than a bit more with these particular ones."

A recorded endorsement has also been provided. [links to Sonichu Medallion, Handmade by CWC audio]

Handmade Sonichu Medallion, WITH MEGASTONE

Handmade Handpainted Sonichu Medallion by Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu Prime. Includes polished quartz Megastone, just the same as the very medallion CWC wears.

Every medallion is signed and comes with authentication certificate.

Warhol/Chris Chan Handmade Book Jackets - Handmade by CWC

These are handcrafted book jackets by Christine Weston Chandler made exclusively to be put on Don Lashomb's "Warhol/Chris Chan."

A description by Chris Chan has been included on the sidebar, as well as each being autographed by CWC. All were personally made and laminated. (NOTE: THIS IS JUST A JACKET, BOOK NOT INCLUDED)

Neo Spiritual Mantra

This is authentic art by Christine Weston Chandler, done while being held in Orange County Jail. These are prayer mantras, meant to be put about one's house and celebrate Jesus Christine Chandler.

Due to limited resources while incarcerated, Christine has drawn each on the back of a soda wrapper.

In package: - 1 prayer wrapper, laminated or as is. Lamination will add an upcharge of $5.00

(It should be noted that the amount available will change, as Chris mails out art sporadically.)

Description from 17 October 2023 relisting
Neo Spiritual Mantra (LIMITED STOCK)

This is authentic art by Christine Weston Chandler, done while being held in Orange County Jail. These are prayer mantras, meant to be put about one's house and celebrate Jesus Christine Chandler.

Due to limited resources while incarcerated, Christine had drawn each on the back of a soda wrapper.

In package: - 1 prayer wrapper, laminated or as is. Lamination will add an upcharge of $5.00

NOTE ON STOCK: As Christine is no longer incarcerated, the need to limit art to the things scrounged from prison trash is no longer required. This means more traditional art will soon be appearing on the store, but these wrapper pieces will soon be gone forever.

Temple of Sonichu Sacred Rocks (2nd run)

These canvas sacks hold glorious gravel, hand-picked by Christine for distribution from her sacred driveway.

Each bag also holds 1-2 crystals/rocks from Chris's personal hoard for maximum blessing, as well as miscellaneous polished rocks and gravel. The amount of bowls filled with polished fishbowl bedding owned by Christine was far more than one could even guess.

Each includes a signed certificate from Christine authenticating the bag as filled with not just driveway or flowerbed gravel, but her love.

Spiritual Talismans

Spiritual Talismans, LIMITED STOCK

These pieces are framed talismans Christine creates and hangs around her cells and rooms. Christine states that they ward off "Bad spirits, negative vibrations, and hateful trolls."

Due to her limited materials provided to her, talismans are created out of paper scrap and the cut out bottoms of foam cups.

Ward off evil and invite Chandler energy into your life. Each additionally comes with a real signed authentication certificate, originally signed in preparation for a release of crystals blessed by Christine. As this did not come to pass due to the arrest, they are now repurposed here.

NOTE ON STOCK: As Christine is no longer incarcerated, the need to limit art to the things scrounged from prison trash is no longer required. This means more traditional art will soon be appearing on the store, but these prison cup pieces will soon be gone forever.

Description from 1 November 2023
These pieces are framed talismans Christine creates and hangs around her home and rooms. Christine states that they ward off "Bad spirits, negative vibrations, and hateful trolls."

These are made of paper and foam. All of the foam cup bottoms come from the jail, as they had been periodically mailed in when Chris was previously incarcerated.

Ward off evil and invite Chandler energy into your life. Each additionally comes with a real signed authentication certificate by CWC.[38]

2021 Lost Commissions

Main article: 2021 Lost Commissions

Chaos Crystal Control Act 4 Art Series

Main article: Chaos Crystal Control Act 4

Commissions

Main article: Praetor Commissions

SONICHU: Autographed Print Comic

vol 0-3

vol 0 description
The original first book that introduces Sonichu, Rosechu and the city of Cwcville. 48 Pages.

Personally autographed and signed.

-Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu Prime

vol 1 description
Sonichu encounters a clone that was made of his DNA from his encounter with Naitsirhc. 50 Pages.

Personally autographed and signed.

-Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu Prime

vol 2 description
Christian Chandler of Cwcville, an old friend, and her ex-boyfriend, end up finding out they're half-Sonichu. 48 Pages.

Personally autographed and signed.

-Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu Prime

vol 3 description
The fateful meeting and getting together of the fab five, out of the many Special Sonichus and Rosechus, who make up the Chaotic Combo. 48 Pages.

Personally autographed and signed.

-Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu Prime

COMBO DEAL description
A True and Honest Deal: First 4 Sonichu comics, personally autographed by Christine Weston Chandler.

PACK CONTAINS:
- Sonichu Vol. 0, 48pg
- Sonichu Vol. 1, 50pg
- Sonichu Vol. 2, 48pg
- Sonichu Vol. 3, 48pg

Sonic Totem Minis - Handpainted + Authenticity Certificate

3D printed, personally hand-painted and blessed, these little Sonic Totems based off the original art piece made from paper mache and a big tube are simple and elegant in their quirky charm. Each painted one is a unique piece that will make you feel content in appreciating that all are and can be good and light powered, even if visibly different. Each comes also with a signed authentication certificate. -Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu Prime.

Sonichu Amiibo HANDMADE BY CWC

Sonichu Amiibo inspired by my personal Sonichu Amiibo figure, personally blessed, painted and signed by Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime. This figure does not have Amiibo functionality.

COMES WITH - one printed painted and signed resin figure - one authentication certificate

References

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  2. December 2020 social media posts#Praetor sells medallions
  3. February 2021 social media posts#Golden Church of Sonichu Medallion
  4. https://archive.ph/Pe4Sj
  5. April 2021 social media posts#Etsy stuff
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  34. https://web.archive.org/web/20230308031923/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1225117587/chris-chan-jail-art-neo-spiritual-mantra
  35. https://web.archive.org/web/20231101154214/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1225117587/chris-chan-jail-art-neo-spiritual-mantra?show_sold_out_detail=1&ref=nla_listing_details
  36. https://web.archive.org/web/20231020121720/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1225994563/temple-of-sonichu-sacred-rocks
  37. https://web.archive.org/web/20231101145421/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1225994563/temple-of-sonichu-sacred-rocks?click_key=c6f57e43f179ca2077f7bbdaf5747312ff254b4e%3A1225994563&click_sum=7eec21c9&ref=shop_home_active_3&crt=1
  38. https://web.archive.org/web/20231101151311/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1211179552/chris-chan-jail-art-spiritual-talismans?click_key=49faa411fb2cfe9224256475afb980b92283eab1%3A1211179552&click_sum=dce8b320&ref=shop_home_active_2&crt=1
  39. https://web.archive.org/web/20240119125459/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1660961757/sonichu-vol-0-autographed-print-comic
  40. https://web.archive.org/web/20240119130722/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1646781266/sonichu-vol-1-autographed-print-comic
  41. https://web.archive.org/web/20240119130249/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1660964331/sonichu-vol-2-autographed-print-comic?click_key=9ec369da49743765e1cb6948d8e4af24f1f39db6%3A1660964331&click_sum=9ee731c3&ref=shop_home_active_5
  42. https://web.archive.org/web/20240119130444/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1646785850/sonichu-vol-3-autographed-print-comic?click_key=fefc8c2bc3f829d7be0bf40688488956d51b79d9%253A1646785850
  43. https://web.archive.org/web/20240119130939/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1646794572/combo-deal-sonichu-vol-0-1-2-and-3
  44. https://web.archive.org/web/20240120215454/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1661938295/sonic-totem-minis-handpainted
  45. https://web.archive.org/web/20240331181137/https://www.etsy.com/listing/1705701169/sonichu-amiibo-handmade-by-cwc
  46. File:Praetor Sonichu Amiibo $75.jpg

PraetorIcon.png Praetor Saga PraetorIcon.png
The Players

People: ChrisPraetorNaughtMKRNightVeeLarry VaughnIsabella JankeThe WCTKyleGiBiVal


Tasers: Business:
Coinciding Sagas: Watchmen, Jail, Revelations