Pickle
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| “ | If I see a dick, I just look away, with a moment of being freaked out! | ” |
| Chris, on dicks. | ||
Pickle is Chris's euphemism for "penis" (typically in the context of a penis other than his own). He and Sonichu (because he's a Mary Sue) both hate penises due to Chris's intense sexual insecurity, to the point that they hate literal pickled cucumbers as well.
Chris even cringes when he looks at his own pickle, but then again everybody cringes at Chris's pickle. Presumably due to years of strenuous masturbation, his pickle is now strangely bent, even when erect. Whether this is from a terrible fapping accident, or simply God ensuring that Christian fails even at things he has no control over, is currently unknown.
He is easily provoked by fan art suggesting that Rosechu has a pickle, although it is difficult for him to retaliate since that would require him to actually look at the dreaded vegetable.
Coincidentally, one of Chris's most notorious enemies is the "Man in the Pickle Suit" who has frequently tricked him into, among other things, releasing photos of his pickle.
Pickled cucumbers
| “ | They taste terrible, and they look like dicks; even more disgusting. | ” |
| Chris, answering a troll's email regarding pickles[citation needed] | ||
Aside from his hatred of metaphorical pickles, it is also well documented that Christian has a long-standing aversion to the delicious cucumbers pickled in brine, going as far back to some of the earlier material documented in his scrapbook. Receipts from his trip to Ohio in search of Julie show that he specifically orders his fast-food hamburgers without pickles. Even images of pickles bother him - the picklish ad banners placed on CWCipedia in November 2009 provoked an angry response.
Whether this is because pickles remind him, even when sliced and under the bun of a sandwich, of cocks, or whether he simply has an aversion to foods with a strong taste or smell, remains to be seen. Considering his diet, pickles may simply be too much flavor for a man who has notoriously bland tastes to handle.
References to pickles
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This article is still yet to be completed due to stress. We get a lot of stressful torture in our lives that makes us crash into slumber. Given that inspiration is a big variable, and we may have been lacking of it, this article will be completed as soon as possible, at our own pace... HONEST!
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Chris isn't the only one to be afflicted by this fear:
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This article, like Chris's pickle, is a bit small. You can help CWCki by expanding it. |