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A Warm Fuzzy Tale

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War is never the answer; peace is. Never fight. Compliments will get you fuzzy-wuzzies. War gets you prickly-wicklies... as well as punches. They get you those, too. Thank you very much, and have a wonderful day.
 

 

—Christian Weston Chandler

"A Warm Fuzzy Tale" is a story written by Claude Steiner, a clinical psychologist professor.[1] His book had the noble goal of teaching children that acts of love cost nothing and are worth giving. Chris, who might have read the book (or had the book read to him), felt the need to include those pieces of wisdom in his comic and his "Future Message".

Fuzzy-Wuzzies

According to Chris, Fuzzy-Wuzzies are the reward for paying people compliments. The benefits of gaining fuzzy-wuzzies are unclear, although there is surely someone out there who can describe the consequences of paying Chris a compliment. In any event, fuzzy-wuzzies are surely preferable to the noxious prickly-wicklies.

Chris is probably unaware that "fuzzy-wuzzy" is also a racist term for the Hadendoa people.

Prickly-Wicklies

You're apt to find plenty of these accompanying Prickly-Wicklies...
...or these.

Prickly-Wicklies (not to be confused with plain old pricks) are, on the other hand, the undesirable end result of going to war (a.k.a. lulz). Although doubtlessly making perfect sense to him, Chris fails to elaborate on the consequences of this forfeit. Prickly-wicklies could therefore constitute anything from scorn for engaging in combat, to painful, prolonged death in a mustard-gas clouded barrack. Prickly-wicklies are also known to give people slugs, as opposed to their antithesis, fuzzy-wuzzies, which give people hugs.

It should be noted that Chris couldn't follow his own advice and declared war numerous times, such as in the War Paint Video. He must be swimming in prickly-wicklies by now.

References by Chris

  • In his Future Message, Chris ends the video with the segment quoted above. Being that the video was one of Chris's earliest, it at the time only served to confuse the trolls who had only just discovered a new autistic manchild, and it foreshadowed Chris's later tendency to make up words and assume that other people understood what he meant.
  • In Sub-Episode 1 of Sonichu #0, just after Chris is nearly shot by Jerkhief, Chris has a line making reference to Fuzzy-Wuzzies and Prickly-Wicklies, and talking about slugs (Specifically- "Fuzzy-Wuzzies get you hugs, Pricklu-Wicklies get you slugs"/[2] This was immediately followed by Chris destroying the man's home life. So giving people Prickly-Wicklies is OK if it's in revenge. However, Chris says he received a slug from the Jerkop, which called for his Curse Ye Ha Me Ha attack, implying that Chris had dealt a Prickly-Wickly in order to get the slug.

References

  1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Claude_Steiner#Publications
  2. http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_4/Page_7

External Links

See also

The CWC-tionary

Relationships: Attraction Location | Boyfriend-free girl | Darling | Dating education | Gal-pal | Heart Level | Homos | Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor | Love Quest | Noviophobia | SLGBTQ | Sweetheart | Sweetheart from the Ground-Up

Sex: China | Comeuppance | Duck | Mass debating | Pedofork | Pickle | Raincoat | Recycling | Virgin with rage | Virginia is for Virgins | Women's rights

Himself: Biological clock | Butt garments | Captain's Log | Curse-ye-ha-me-ha | DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS | Fangs | Fuzzy-wuzzies | Godjesus | Honest Content | Mental Block | Monthly tugboat | Muscle bra | Prickly-Wicklies | Random-access humor | Reality Cartoon | Scale of Respect | Tomgirl | Un-clit

Stressors: 4-cent_garbage | HEXBox | JERKS | Jerkops | Kick the Autistic | Laughs Under Lucricities | Manajerks | Naïve | Niggos | Pmurt | Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens | Slow-in-the-minds | Tobacky

Comics: Anchuent Prophecy | Cherokian Clan | Da Update | Electric Hedgehog Pokemon | Nombie-zazis| Parody | Reeb | Sub-Episodes | Sweetbolt


See also: Chris and English