Template:ListOfVideos/Jan-Jun2009
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January 2009
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 6th, 2009 (5:47)
Christian announces that a deal has been made with Nintendo of America to introduce Sonichu and Rosechu as characters in the new Animal Crossing: City Folk game, although he seems to believe that early versions of these characters have somehow escaped into the internet.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 8th, 2009 (1:43)
Christian issues a statement announcing the hacking of sonichu.net by Gregg Mays, demanding that the site be restored.
- I am STRAIGHT 12 January 2009 (:08)
Frustrated with accusations that he is gay, Chris attempts to set the record straight once and for all. He holds up a relatively tame picture of Britney Spears, apparently thinking that owning magazines with sexy photos of women in them is proof of his heterosexuality.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2009 (4:19)
Possibly under pressure from Shigeru Miyamoto and Reggie Fils-Aimé, Christian uploads this video to deny his page on Encyclopedia Dramatica as officially as possible. He also forbids everyone from looking at it.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009 (:50)
Chris warns his fans that Jason Kendrick Howell has hacked his Tripod account again, so he informs them of his new Tripod account and website.
- CWC to Mr. Miyamoto-san 17 January 2009 (2:20)
During his talks with Shigeru Miyamoto to produce his own line of video games, Christian hits a snag when Miyamoto jumps to the conclusion that he is talking to a troll and not the real Christian Weston Chandler. To recover the trust of his business partner, Chris rushes to produce this video, in which he tries to appeal to Miyamoto's cultural background.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 18th, 2009 (1:37)
Christian issues a scathing statement concerning hackers who used his email account to send messages to dozens of people saying Christian has come out of the closet. He denies this outrageous claim and proves his heterosexuality by stomping on the vibrator he has owned for years.
- Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash 19 January 2009 (3:23)
Christian begs Clyde Cash to stop torturing him for revenge over his brother's suicide. He suggests Clyde just get over it, and compares the death of Ryan Cash to the death of his dog.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 21st, 2009 (1:35)
Christian announces that sonichu.info, the site he created just days ago following the hacking of sonichu.net, has also been hacked. He promises his fans (especially the female ones) that he will restore his true website soon.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 26th, 2009 (1:43)
After weeks of talking about collaborating with Shigeru Miyamoto, Christian disappeared from the internet for several days around the time that he was scheduled to meet with Miyamoto in Redmond, Washington. Speculation grew that Christian was actually attempting to make this cross-country journey, until he finally posted this video, claiming to have just returned. Somehow you can just tell he hasn't even left his house since his last video.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 30th, 2009 (3:24)
Chris retracts his January 26 statement about having flown to Nintendo of America headquarters to meet Shigeru Miyamoto. He also angrily responds to Reggie Fils-Aimé and his complaint about a panty shot in Chris's PowerPoint presentation, a complaint Chris distorts into false allegations of nudity and characterizes as a general opposition to heterosexuality.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 31st, 2009 (5:56)
Chris retracts his 30 January retraction of his 26 January retraction, and apologizes for his unprofessional behavior toward Shigeru Miyamoto and Reggie Fils-Aimé. He then begs and pleads for Miyamoto and Fils-Aimé to merely postpone the Sonichu video game project indefinitely, rather than cancel it outright.
February 2009
- Chris Comes Out of the Closet 5 February 2009 (6:09)
Threatening Julie with harm, Clyde Cash demanded that Chris come out of the closet on YouTube in exchange for her safety. Ambivalent about how to handle the situation, Chris posts a video in which he filibusters for nearly three minutes and finally declares himself to be a "Gaybian".
- Chris Destroys His Vibrator 6 February 2009 (2:58)
Christian explains why he had to make the two videos suggesting that he was gay, in order to satisfy an agreement with Clyde Cash. He then attempts to honor another agreement with Clyde by destroying his vibrator.
- Captain's Log, Stardate February 8th, 2009 (2:52)
In this video, Chris briefly recaps his previous videos, announces a new website, and speculates that PandaHalo may have been killed in the Australian Bushfires.
- Captain's Log, Stardate February 10th, 2009 (3:20)
Chris shows off his bedroom floor, in a bid to demonstrate to Clyde Cash that he has fulfilled his end of their agreement. Chris then follows up by reading a letter from Nintendo of America, responding to his private query about his negotiations with Shigeru Miyamoto.
- Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009 (2:30)
Chris opens by explaining that he's just finished filming a dedication for one of his sweetest Sonichu Girls. He doesn't name this female fan, but it's nevertheless clear that he's referring to Sarah May. Chris goes on to apologize for having ever said that he hates all gays.
- For Julie's Eyes Only 20 February 2009 (7:40)
JULAYYYY
March 2009
- Captain's Log, Stardate March 4th, 2009 (2:26)
Chris, visibly distraught after the outing of Julie, explains that he has been under a lot of stress lately. He tells his fans to not believe the trolls, and yet, they shouldn't believe him, since he's not wearing his medallion.
- Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009 (4:45)
Chris sees the March 8 episode of Family Guy, "Family Gay," in which Peter Griffin becomes homosexual and Stewie cites Leviticus 18:22 in opposition of this development. In other news, Chris is hard at work on a new Sonichu medallion, and he publicly announces that he is withdrawing from the internet as a front in his Love Quest.
- Apology to Game & Hobby Place 16 March 2009 (:47)
Chris apologizes to Michael Snyder of The GAMe PLACe so that he can buy Eye of Judgement cards.
- Captain's Log, Stardate March 18th, 2009 (2:03)
Chris explains a few recent happenings, or lack thereof. He expresses his hope that he'll win some Eye of Judgment tournament and get some special cards. He then goes on to make excuses for his predictable delays in turning out any new comic pages, and he makes a brief shout-out to Ivy.
- CWC's Message for Ivy 20 March 2009 (:59)
Chris sends a "romantic" message to Ivy that will haunt your dreams.
- CWC Music Video Holding Out For a Hero 26 March 2009 (5:52)
Chris makes a "music video" to the song "Holding Out For a Hero" for Ivy. He also shows off new comic pictures in the process.
- Captain's Log, Stardate March 26th, 2009 (2:50)
Chris threatens to withhold comics from his fans if trolls refuse to leave Megan alone.
- Tour of Chris's House 27 March 2009 (8:59)
Chris gives a video tour of the landfill that is his house.
- Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009 (2:48)
Outraged over the leaking of secret information that he undoubtedly freely distributed to some stranger on the internet, Chris blows his stack and expresses his outrage in the only outlet he has--yelling empty threats and dirty words on the YouTube.
- Chris Sings Lovin' You 29 March 2009 (1:45)
In what is perhaps Chris's creepiest video to date, Chris delivers a short speech to Ivy and shows a few pictures. Chris's poor rendition of "Lovin' You" is sung in the background throughout.
- Chris Sings Fart Song for Flora 30 March 2009 (5:33)
Christian gives a prepared speech about the importance of flatulence, and then sings about farting.
- Take that Page DOWN NOW! 30 March 2009 (5:23)
Christian rages against his ED page, and then abuses a doll with a picture of Clyde Cash attached to its face.
- Secret Weapon 30 March 2009 (:41)
Chris makes fun of Clyde Cash based on his "mugshot" (actually a picture of Lee Hotti).
- YouTube Finale 30 March 2009 (1:08)
Chris calls out to Clyde Cash again, threatening to beat him up. At the same time, he decides to withdraw from the YouTube scene... for now.
April 2009
- Captain's Log, Stardate April 9th, 2009 (1:16)
Chris posts his video on his new YouTube account, a week after saying he's leaving YouTube. He also announces his new website, http://www.cwcville.com.
- Captain's Log, Stardate Easter Sunday, 2009 (1:24)
Chris announces the recent changes to cwcville.com, and lets his sweetheart Ivy know that he loves her.
- More for the crabs 12 April 2009 (:28)
Chris gives a shoutout to Ivy's hermit crabs, Crass and Champ.
- The Return of Kimmi 12 April 2009 (:50)
Chris gives a shoutout to Ivy by kissing his blow-up doll taped with Ivy's face for a good 20 seconds.
- Bunny Hop 12 April 2009 (1:01)
Chris gives another shoutout to Crass and Champ by dancing like a child.
- A CWC Audition 16 April 2009 (7:46)
Chris video tapes himself in an audition with "Vanessa Hudgens".
- April 16 Fetish Vids 16 April 2009 (2:25)
Three leaked videos showing Chris drinking his own semen, spanking himself, and dancing naked in the shower.
- I am devoted to My Sweetest Ivy 17 April 2009 (1:58)
Chris apologizes to Ivy by talking to his sex doll (with Ivy's face attached) before he makes out with it.
- Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions 17 April 2009 (4:49)
Chris apologizes to Ivy for cheating on her with Vanessa Hudgens with complete insincerity.
- Chris Calls Clyde Out 23 April 2009 (1:45)
After a nearly week-long silence, Chris finally speaks up again, this time calling out Clyde Cash.
- CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me" 24 April 2009 (7:14)
Chris does another music video, this time to "It's All Coming Back To Me" by Celine Dion, for his and Ivy's wedding.
- I Got A Fish 27 April 2009 (:12)
Chris gayly sings and dances.
- Power 27 April 2009 (1:06)
Chris shows how "strong" he is.
- CWCFlyingElephants 27 April 2009 (6:54)
In what is possibly the most insane video he's ever made, Chris runs around in his room, naked, screaming whatever comes to his mind.
- Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009 (6:04)
In this set of videos, Chris addresses the 16 April release of video and pictures and admits what was already obvious--that the woman for whom he made the sex videos is Ivy.
- Captain's Log, Stardate April 29th, 2009 (:48)
Chris apologizes for delays in any new comics and then leaves for a haircut.
- ShutUpBrain and WakeUpBrain 30 April 2009 (1:27)
Chris dramatizes his biological clock, which involves repeatedly hitting himself.
May 2009
- For My Sweetest Ivy 1 May 2009 (5:08)
Chris threatens Ivy with promises of sex and hanging out at the mall and sings a Mary Poppins song.
- Keep CWC's Wikipedia Up 3 May 2009 (3:03)
Chris urges the Sonichu and Rosechu fanbase to keep up his Wikipedia page after it was deleted by Wikipedia Admins so that no more vicious lies and slander will spread about him on the internet.
- CWC Address to Unilever About AXE 4 May 2009 (6:36)
Chris tells Unilever to stop selling their products to homos.
- CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters 20 May 2009 (1:33)
A little bit of everything, Chris swears off falling for trolls, sings a silly song about being lonely, and tells the trolls to die.
- Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009 (2:50)
Chris explains that he has closed the cwcville.com domain and has no plans to reopen it in the near future. He also notes he won't be making as many videos in the future. He seems surprisingly cognizant of the fact that if he stops producing content on the internet then the trolls will have no new material to use against him.
June 2009
- Chris's Big Night Out 12 June 2009 (4:33)
Chris visits a local bar/restaurant, where he encounters a pair of fans who record him.
- Don't Trust Any Homos Over There 15 June 2009 (2:02)
Chris sings his own version of the song "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There", replacing "Niggas" with "Homos."
- I'm Sorry, Dude 15 June 2009 (3:02)
Chris apologizes to his gal-pal Kim for offending her gay brother.
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January 2009
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 6th, 2009 (5:47)
Christian announces that a deal has been made with Nintendo of America to introduce Sonichu and Rosechu as characters in the new Animal Crossing: City Folk game, although he seems to believe that early versions of these characters have somehow escaped into the internet.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 8th, 2009 (1:43)
Christian issues a statement announcing the hacking of sonichu.net by Gregg Mays, demanding that the site be restored.
- I am STRAIGHT 12 January 2009 (:08)
Frustrated with accusations that he is gay, Chris attempts to set the record straight once and for all. He holds up a relatively tame picture of Britney Spears, apparently thinking that owning magazines with sexy photos of women in them is proof of his heterosexuality.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2009 (4:19)
Possibly under pressure from Shigeru Miyamoto and Reggie Fils-Aimé, Christian uploads this video to deny his page on Encyclopedia Dramatica as officially as possible. He also forbids everyone from looking at it.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009 (:50)
Chris warns his fans that Jason Kendrick Howell has hacked his Tripod account again, so he informs them of his new Tripod account and website.
- CWC to Mr. Miyamoto-san 17 January 2009 (2:20)
During his talks with Shigeru Miyamoto to produce his own line of video games, Christian hits a snag when Miyamoto jumps to the conclusion that he is talking to a troll and not the real Christian Weston Chandler. To recover the trust of his business partner, Chris rushes to produce this video, in which he tries to appeal to Miyamoto's cultural background.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 18th, 2009 (1:37)
Christian issues a scathing statement concerning hackers who used his email account to send messages to dozens of people saying Christian has come out of the closet. He denies this outrageous claim and proves his heterosexuality by stomping on the vibrator he has owned for years.
- Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash 19 January 2009 (3:23)
Christian begs Clyde Cash to stop torturing him for revenge over his brother's suicide. He suggests Clyde just get over it, and compares the death of Ryan Cash to the death of his dog.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 21st, 2009 (1:35)
Christian announces that sonichu.info, the site he created just days ago following the hacking of sonichu.net, has also been hacked. He promises his fans (especially the female ones) that he will restore his true website soon.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 26th, 2009 (1:43)
After weeks of talking about collaborating with Shigeru Miyamoto, Christian disappeared from the internet for several days around the time that he was scheduled to meet with Miyamoto in Redmond, Washington. Speculation grew that Christian was actually attempting to make this cross-country journey, until he finally posted this video, claiming to have just returned. Somehow you can just tell he hasn't even left his house since his last video.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 30th, 2009 (3:24)
Chris retracts his January 26 statement about having flown to Nintendo of America headquarters to meet Shigeru Miyamoto. He also angrily responds to Reggie Fils-Aimé and his complaint about a panty shot in Chris's PowerPoint presentation, a complaint Chris distorts into false allegations of nudity and characterizes as a general opposition to heterosexuality.
- Captain's Log, Stardate January 31st, 2009 (5:56)
Chris retracts his 30 January retraction of his 26 January retraction, and apologizes for his unprofessional behavior toward Shigeru Miyamoto and Reggie Fils-Aimé. He then begs and pleads for Miyamoto and Fils-Aimé to merely postpone the Sonichu video game project indefinitely, rather than cancel it outright.
February 2009
- Chris Comes Out of the Closet 5 February 2009 (6:09)
Threatening Julie with harm, Clyde Cash demanded that Chris come out of the closet on YouTube in exchange for her safety. Ambivalent about how to handle the situation, Chris posts a video in which he filibusters for nearly three minutes and finally declares himself to be a "Gaybian".
- Chris Destroys His Vibrator 6 February 2009 (2:58)
Christian explains why he had to make the two videos suggesting that he was gay, in order to satisfy an agreement with Clyde Cash. He then attempts to honor another agreement with Clyde by destroying his vibrator.
- Captain's Log, Stardate February 8th, 2009 (2:52)
In this video, Chris briefly recaps his previous videos, announces a new website, and speculates that PandaHalo may have been killed in the Australian Bushfires.
- Captain's Log, Stardate February 10th, 2009 (3:20)
Chris shows off his bedroom floor, in a bid to demonstrate to Clyde Cash that he has fulfilled his end of their agreement. Chris then follows up by reading a letter from Nintendo of America, responding to his private query about his negotiations with Shigeru Miyamoto.
- Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009 (2:30)
Chris opens by explaining that he's just finished filming a dedication for one of his sweetest Sonichu Girls. He doesn't name this female fan, but it's nevertheless clear that he's referring to Sarah May. Chris goes on to apologize for having ever said that he hates all gays.
- For Julie's Eyes Only 20 February 2009 (7:40)
JULAYYYY
March 2009
- Captain's Log, Stardate March 4th, 2009 (2:26)
Chris, visibly distraught after the outing of Julie, explains that he has been under a lot of stress lately. He tells his fans to not believe the trolls, and yet, they shouldn't believe him, since he's not wearing his medallion.
- Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009 (4:45)
Chris sees the March 8 episode of Family Guy, "Family Gay," in which Peter Griffin becomes homosexual and Stewie cites Leviticus 18:22 in opposition of this development. In other news, Chris is hard at work on a new Sonichu medallion, and he publicly announces that he is withdrawing from the internet as a front in his Love Quest.
- Apology to Game & Hobby Place 16 March 2009 (:47)
Chris apologizes to Michael Snyder of The GAMe PLACe so that he can buy Eye of Judgement cards.
- Captain's Log, Stardate March 18th, 2009 (2:03)
Chris explains a few recent happenings, or lack thereof. He expresses his hope that he'll win some Eye of Judgment tournament and get some special cards. He then goes on to make excuses for his predictable delays in turning out any new comic pages, and he makes a brief shout-out to Ivy.
- CWC's Message for Ivy 20 March 2009 (:59)
Chris sends a "romantic" message to Ivy that will haunt your dreams.
- CWC Music Video Holding Out For a Hero 26 March 2009 (5:52)
Chris makes a "music video" to the song "Holding Out For a Hero" for Ivy. He also shows off new comic pictures in the process.
- Captain's Log, Stardate March 26th, 2009 (2:50)
Chris threatens to withhold comics from his fans if trolls refuse to leave Megan alone.
- Tour of Chris's House 27 March 2009 (8:59)
Chris gives a video tour of the landfill that is his house.
- Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009 (2:48)
Outraged over the leaking of secret information that he undoubtedly freely distributed to some stranger on the internet, Chris blows his stack and expresses his outrage in the only outlet he has--yelling empty threats and dirty words on the YouTube.
- Chris Sings Lovin' You 29 March 2009 (1:45)
In what is perhaps Chris's creepiest video to date, Chris delivers a short speech to Ivy and shows a few pictures. Chris's poor rendition of "Lovin' You" is sung in the background throughout.
- Chris Sings Fart Song for Flora 30 March 2009 (5:33)
Christian gives a prepared speech about the importance of flatulence, and then sings about farting.
- Take that Page DOWN NOW! 30 March 2009 (5:23)
Christian rages against his ED page, and then abuses a doll with a picture of Clyde Cash attached to its face.
- Secret Weapon 30 March 2009 (:41)
Chris makes fun of Clyde Cash based on his "mugshot" (actually a picture of Lee Hotti).
- YouTube Finale 30 March 2009 (1:08)
Chris calls out to Clyde Cash again, threatening to beat him up. At the same time, he decides to withdraw from the YouTube scene... for now.
April 2009
- Captain's Log, Stardate April 9th, 2009 (1:16)
Chris posts his video on his new YouTube account, a week after saying he's leaving YouTube. He also announces his new website, http://www.cwcville.com.
- Captain's Log, Stardate Easter Sunday, 2009 (1:24)
Chris announces the recent changes to cwcville.com, and lets his sweetheart Ivy know that he loves her.
- More for the crabs 12 April 2009 (:28)
Chris gives a shoutout to Ivy's hermit crabs, Crass and Champ.
- The Return of Kimmi 12 April 2009 (:50)
Chris gives a shoutout to Ivy by kissing his blow-up doll taped with Ivy's face for a good 20 seconds.
- Bunny Hop 12 April 2009 (1:01)
Chris gives another shoutout to Crass and Champ by dancing like a child.
- A CWC Audition 16 April 2009 (7:46)
Chris video tapes himself in an audition with "Vanessa Hudgens".
- April 16 Fetish Vids 16 April 2009 (2:25)
Three leaked videos showing Chris drinking his own semen, spanking himself, and dancing naked in the shower.
- I am devoted to My Sweetest Ivy 17 April 2009 (1:58)
Chris apologizes to Ivy by talking to his sex doll (with Ivy's face attached) before he makes out with it.
- Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions 17 April 2009 (4:49)
Chris apologizes to Ivy for cheating on her with Vanessa Hudgens with complete insincerity.
- Chris Calls Clyde Out 23 April 2009 (1:45)
After a nearly week-long silence, Chris finally speaks up again, this time calling out Clyde Cash.
- CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me" 24 April 2009 (7:14)
Chris does another music video, this time to "It's All Coming Back To Me" by Celine Dion, for his and Ivy's wedding.
- I Got A Fish 27 April 2009 (:12)
Chris gayly sings and dances.
- Power 27 April 2009 (1:06)
Chris shows how "strong" he is.
- CWCFlyingElephants 27 April 2009 (6:54)
In what is possibly the most insane video he's ever made, Chris runs around in his room, naked, screaming whatever comes to his mind.
- Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009 (6:04)
In this set of videos, Chris addresses the 16 April release of video and pictures and admits what was already obvious--that the woman for whom he made the sex videos is Ivy.
- Captain's Log, Stardate April 29th, 2009 (:48)
Chris apologizes for delays in any new comics and then leaves for a haircut.
- ShutUpBrain and WakeUpBrain 30 April 2009 (1:27)
Chris dramatizes his biological clock, which involves repeatedly hitting himself.
May 2009
- For My Sweetest Ivy 1 May 2009 (5:08)
Chris threatens Ivy with promises of sex and hanging out at the mall and sings a Mary Poppins song.
- Keep CWC's Wikipedia Up 3 May 2009 (3:03)
Chris urges the Sonichu and Rosechu fanbase to keep up his Wikipedia page after it was deleted by Wikipedia Admins so that no more vicious lies and slander will spread about him on the internet.
- CWC Address to Unilever About AXE 4 May 2009 (6:36)
Chris tells Unilever to stop selling their products to homos.
- CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters 20 May 2009 (1:33)
A little bit of everything, Chris swears off falling for trolls, sings a silly song about being lonely, and tells the trolls to die.
- Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009 (2:50)
Chris explains that he has closed the cwcville.com domain and has no plans to reopen it in the near future. He also notes he won't be making as many videos in the future. He seems surprisingly cognizant of the fact that if he stops producing content on the internet then the trolls will have no new material to use against him.
June 2009
- Chris's Big Night Out 12 June 2009 (4:33)
Chris visits a local bar/restaurant, where he encounters a pair of fans who record him.
- Don't Trust Any Homos Over There 15 June 2009 (2:02)
Chris sings his own version of the song "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There", replacing "Niggas" with "Homos."
- I'm Sorry, Dude 15 June 2009 (3:02)
Chris apologizes to his gal-pal Kim for offending her gay brother.