Jason Kendrick Howell message
I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD is Chris's infantile-yet-laconic threat to Jason Kendrick Howell after the hacking of Sonichu.net in January 2009. In fact, Howell had nothing to do with the site's demise, for the mastermind was someone far more nefarious.
Context
On 6 January 2009, Gregg Mays contacted Chris, claiming to be an employee of Nintendo. Mays said he had been assigned to redesign Sonichu.net as part of the cross-promotion of Sonichu and Animal Crossing.
In fact, Gregg was really Clyde Cash, seeking vengeance for the suicide of his little brother a few weeks earlier. By 8 January, Chris entrusted him with the password to the site, and in no time at all the site was vandalized. Unable to access the site to restore it, Chris accused Gregg of being a troll and changing the password to lock him out of his Tripod account. Gregg claimed he couldn't access the site either, and suggested that he could restore it if Chris reset the password to his account. Chris complied on 10 January, and soon the account was deleted altogether.
Then, on the 12th, Mays declared that he was Jason Kendrick Howell, a.k.a. Liquid Snake, the creator of the Chris-Chan page on Encyclopedia Dramatica. After taunting Chris and demanding he make videos for his amusement, Cash finally changed his mind on 17 January, and admitted that he was in fact Clyde Cash all along, and not Jason Kendrick Howell.
Chris ignored this revelation, thinking it was the Jason making up yet another alias. After all, Chris had long considered Howell to be the mastermind behind all of the trolls, while Clyde was new to the scene. Further, Chris sent the real Jason an angry voice mail, and gloated about this in response to a bewildered Clyde.
Meanwhile, the TRUE AND HONEST Jason Kendrick Howell, unaware of any of this, checked his messages and this was what he got...
The Message
 |
WARNING! This video features high levels of Tard Rage. |
| I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD | |
| Stardate | January 17, 2009 |
| Subject Matter | Chris reacts to the hacking of Sonichu.net. |
| Featuring | Chris; Jason Kendrick Howell's Answering Machine |
| Saga |  Clyde Cash Saga  Miyamoto Saga
|
| Audio Recordings | |
| previous Only |
next Only |
Transcript
Answering Machine: First saved message
Jason Kendrick Howell...
You BASTARD!
You BASTARD!
You hacked into everything! You have driven me so beyond the wall, I can't even describe it!
You're laughing now, but
I'll BREAK YOU DEAD!
Goodbye!
Alternative Transcriptions
Some argue Chris is actually saying "I'll pray you dead" since Chris had asked the Sonichu Girls and BlueSpike[1] to to pray for the death of Jason Kendrick Howell. However, Chris begging GodJesus to smite his enemies is not as funny as Chris tard raging and snapping (or attempting to snap) Jason in half.
Jason himself originally transcribed the message with Chris saying "YOU HAPPY NAPPA (?!? no idea)", rather than "You're laughing now". Given his history of communications problems, even Chris himself may have had no idea what he was trying to say.
Legacy
Chris would attempt to re-establish his Sonichu website several times, only to be hacked and vandalized as before. In time, Chris would view Clyde Cash as the leader of the trolls, shifting his ire away from Jason. Throughout 2009, Chris would produce numerous videos directed at Clyde, threatening him, pleading with him, or challenging him.
The rage expressed in the "I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD" message would become a familiar refrain in later sagas, as Chris would often cap off a round of trolling by screaming at his camera and uploading the footage to YouTube.
See also
- Death threats
- Jason Kendrick Howell
- Gregg Mays E-mails
- CWC's Sonichu Site!
- IRC (20 January 2009), Chris and Clyde's next encounter.
- Sonichu 10, when we actually get to see Chris break someone dead.
References
External links
- The audio recording
- A Jason Retrospective Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6 (5.2) Jason's commentary on the early history of Chris-Chan trolling, including his POV on the "I'll BREAK YOU DEAD" message.